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You know what the difference between your book and mine is? MINE WEIGHS MORE!

Word is they're gonna throw the book at you... followed by the bookcase, and then the library, brick by brick!
Rimmer, Red Dwarf

Sticks and Stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me. Unless you throw a dictionary at me. This Is the Colbert Report!
Steven Colbert, The Colbert Report "April 8th, 2008"

[This book] probably won't injure you at all. Unless somebody throws it at you, which is a possibility that should never be discounted
Pseudonymous Bosch, The Name of This Book is Secret

Use of this book for other than the intended purpose is not advised. While it may seem like an ideal projectile, the makers of this book cannot guarantee your safety if you throw it at someone. There is always the possibility that that person will throw it back.
Pseudonymous Bosch, This Isn't What It Looks Like

Lassiter: Spencer, if I see you anywhere near this case, I'll throw every book I can find at you.
Shawn: Oh yeah? And what if you find the Bible? Are you gonna throw that too? Seems a little sacrilegious to me don't you think?
Psych, episode 3

Listen! Such is the power of the Prince of Darkness, that he can kill with a single look! Attacks against Ganon will prove fruitless unless Link attacks with the sacred book.

NO! NOT INTO THE PIT, IT BUUUURRRRNNNSSS!!!

Losing an argument is always painful. Doubly so when the loss is due to some critic beating you unconscious with a leather-bound volume.
Fallen London, after a failed attempt to invoke Talk to the Fist

Well, my book is filled with helpful suggestions for all you parents. But in case you get nothing from the inside, you'll find the outside useful on their little backside.
Ludwig von Drake, Kids is Kids

Ian: Nice hit.
Chris: I'm just glad I got the hardcover instead of the paperback.
Minilife TV, "Home Alone"

Now he’s cryin’! Then I grab a telephone book and I beat him on the torso with it. Cause as any Chicago cop will tell ya, a phone book doesn’t leave bruises.
John Mulaney, Kid Gorgeous

"A gun or a dictionary, both can be used to kill."
Jean Croce, Gunslinger Girl

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