Pierre Chang (talking about the Orchid): It will allow us to manipulate time.
DHARMA Workman: And then what, you're going to go back in time and kill Hitler?
Pierre Chang: Don't be ridiculous. There are rules.
"Time travel and Hitlers are always a bad combination."
"Time travelers! You can go back in time and fuck Hitler, but you can't kill him!"
"Also, don't kill Hitler, even if it really seems like a good idea. Just trust me on this one."
—tailsteak.com, Basic Time Travel Etiquette
At 02:21:30, SneakyPete wrote:
Vienna, 1907: after numerous attempts, have infiltrated the Academy of Fine Arts and facilitated Adolf Hitler's admission to that institution. Goodbye, Hitler the dictator; hello, Hitler the modestly successful landscape artist! Brought back a few of his paintings as well, any buyers?
At 02:29:17, SilverFox316 wrote:
All right; that's it. Having just returned from 1907 Vienna where I secured the expulsion of Hitler from the Academy by means of an elaborate prank involving the Prefect, a goat, and a substantial quantity of olive oil, I now turn my attention to our newer brethren, who, despite rules to the contrary, seem to have no intention of reading Bulletin 1147 (nor its Addendum, Alternate Means of Subverting the Hitlerian Destiny, and here I'm looking at you, SneakyPete). Permit me to sum it up and save you the trouble: no Hitler means no Third Reich, no World War II, no rocketry programs, no electronics, no computers, no time travel. Get the picture?
"Shoot the dictator and prevent the war? But the dictator is merely the tip of the whole festering boil of social pus from which dictators emerge; shoot one, and there'll be another one along in a minute. Shoot him too? Why not shoot everyone and invade Poland?"
A: Time travel is impossible
B: Future people are dicks
C: Future people are really bad at killing Hitler
Jane Goodall: We have an alternate history, and time travelers are all over the place.
Steve Irwin: And we've killed a dozen Hitlers already! We're winning!
"Ever wondered what a parallel universe you might be like? Well, stop wondering, because youíre just Hitler. Every parallel universe ever. You. Hitler. We canít figure it out. Anyway, if you meet him in the next test, donít kill him. I know, I know. But trust me, itíd be bad."
—Unused Cave Johnson line, Portal 2
Commander: Ah, I'm a commanding officer a' th' Navy TIALS. Y'know, Time Air Land Sea. Th' government commissioned a handful'a platoons of us in th' future. Get t' jump back and punch Hitler, win Vietnam, that kind of thing.
Jonesy: But...we didn't win Vietnam...
Commander: Yeeeaaaaah, The Man decided people couldn't handle a world where America took 'Nam an' they sent me back again to sabotage myself.
Commander: Take a moment to imagine yer livin' in a world where th' Rambo movies didn't get made.
Jonesy: [thinks about it, gets a look of horror on her face.]
If someone who knew the future, pointed out a child to you and told you that that child would grow up totally evil, to be a ruthless dictator who would destroy millions of lives... could you then kill that child?
- Fourth Doctor, Doctor Who, "Genesis of the Daleks"
Let's see... You've got a time machine. I've got a gun. What the hell. Let's kill Hitler!
- Mels, Doctor Who, "Let's Kill Hitler"
"Apparently the Russians were not too happy I killed Joseph Stalin... The Americans not wanting world war three, blamed the Hungarians.... who had no capability to dispute, the Soviet union declared war.... however China joined the Hungarians... America saw this as their chance to get on the Russians' good side and ALSO went after China.... And it became a mess.... "
—Imca, We Are Our Avatars
Assistant: Did you find him?
Einstein: Hitler is... out of the way.
Assistant: Congratulations, professor! With Hitler removed-
Einstein: Time will tell. Sooner or later... time will tell...
(Cut to opening sequence, depicting scenes from an even worse war against Stalin)
— Opening sequence to Command & Conquer: Red Alert
Ach, another time traveller. I must have done something terrible in a past life to face so many assassins.
—Hitler himself after killing a time traveller, Deadpool #26
My mission is done. Future generations will be spared the horrors of that madmanís ambitions for all time.
—Paul Driscoll, triggering the rise of an even worse Fuehrer in Weber's Germany: The Veterinarian Totalitarian.