Quotes / Ancient Astronauts

So, it turns out the Greek gods were real. They were a race of aliens that lived on a planet named Pollux IV and traveled to Earth 5,000 years ago to dick around with us.
Cracked, "Star Trek's 6 Most Ridiculous Alien Races"

"Silence you insolent Dirtlings! Before your race crawled out of the primordial ooze my people were pissing in it! Our teenagers wrote graffiti on the plains of Nazca and did spin-outs in your cornfields. Your religions are but cargo cults inspired by race memories of our sex tourists. We abducted the entire Mayan civilization solely to further our studies into the anal regions. You should worship me as a God!"
Plan 7 of 9 from Outer Space

Fry: Incredible. This place is just like the Ancient Egypt of my day.
Osiran: That is no coincidence. For our people visited your Egypt thousands of years ago.
Fry: I knew it! Insane theories, one; regular theories, a billion.
Osiran: We learned many things from the mighty Egyptians, such as pyramid-building, space travel and how to prepare our dead so as to scare Abbott and Costello.
Fry: Also Wolfman!
Futurama, "A Pharaoh to Remember".