Improbable Weapon User / Fire Emblem Heroes

While most of the regular units (barring a few exceptions like Felicia) generally avert this trope, the Seasonal units are a whole other story altogether. Behold the improbability of each as the seasons progress:

• Note that in most cases^note Weapons with '+' after their names (such as Deft Harpoon+ and Green Egg+) can be inherited; weapons without '+' (like Fruit of Idunn and Huginn's Egg) cannot., you can sacrifice these units as skill inheritance fodder to transfer their weapons to another unit. Yes, that means you can create gems such as Sigurd brandishing a bamboo ornament (Kadomatsu), Tana taking a harpoon to the skies, or Michalis wielding a plethora of ridiculous "axes".
• In Spring Festival, Spring Camilla and Spring Lucina use giant easter eggs as tomes while Spring Xander uses a giant carrot as a lance. Spring Chrom is the only one who looks like he's using an actual weapon, but his axe still has carrots embedded in its blade.
• In Bridal Blessings, Bridal Caeda uses a bouquet as a tome, Bridal Charlotte carries a giant spoon like a lance, and Bridal Lyn uses a candlestick like a staff. Meanwhile, Bridal Cordelia wields an appropriately-themed bow, making it the most normal of the four.
• In the Ylissean Summer update, meanwhile, Summer Female Robin fights with a trident with a fish still stuck on it as a lance, Summer Adult Tiki has a watermelon serving as an axe (think a nailboard with the melon placed where the nail would be), Summer Gaius's candy-themed bow uses arrows with sugar pop tips, and Summer Frederick throws seashells as if they're daggers.
• The Nohrian Summer update has Summer Xander use a floatie of Lilith as an axe. While everyone else uses tomes, the tomes all use bizarre elements; Summer Elise attacks with flowers, Summer Female Corrin attacks with live fish, and Summer Leo attacks with tomatoes.
• While the units in the Halloween banner have themed weapons, the one that fully cements this is Halloween Sakura, who uses kitty paddles as daggers. Halloween Henry comes close with a tome that attacks with ghosts.
• Winter's Envoy sees Winter Robin attacking with a decorated Christmas tree as a lance, Winter Tharja wielding a candelabra as a red tome, and Winter Lissa and Winter Chrom using a bell and a sack of gifts as axes respectively.
• Happy New Year! introduces New Year's Male Corrin, New Year's Takumi, New Year's Azura, and New Year's Camilla. New Year's Takumi uses mochi as throwing weapons, New Year's Azura uses a hagoita^note essentially a ping-pong racket for use in a traditional Japanese game called "Hanetsuki" as an axe (blunt force trauma, anyone?), and New Year's Camilla uses a kadomatsu as a sword. Masked Marth even lampshades this trope during the respective "Stepping into the New Year" Tempest Trials.
• An update in February 2018 started a monthly tradition in which existing units gain new personal weapons or refines for existing personal weapons. Such examples include Felicia and Jakob as they received their plates^note actual weapons in Fates to use as daggers.
• The Love Abounds event sees Valentine Lilina and Valentine Lyn attack using wrapped gift boxes as tomes. Valentine Hector, meanwhile, bucks the seasonal-themed weapon trend with an Armads variant.
• In Hares at the Fair, Spring Sharena and Spring Catria use Easter eggs in cups as tomes, Spring Alfonse uses a spoon holding an Easter egg as an axe, and Spring Kagero uses carrots as daggers.
• In Bridal Bloom, Bridal Ninian, Bridal Sanaki, and Bridal Tharja use bouquets as tomes while Groom Marth wields a cake knife like an axe.
• Summer's Arrival sees Summer Innes fight using a beach flag as an axe. Honorable mention goes to Summer Tana, who uses a tome that attacks with fruit.
• A Sketchy Summer has Summer Linde fling starfish as if they're daggers, Summer Camilla use her drink glass as a blue tome, and Summer Young Tiki use a popsicle as a dragonstone.
• Festival in Hoshido has Yukata Xander, Yukata Elincia, and Yukata Ryoma use paper fans as throwing daggers, while Yukata Micaiah uses a suzu^note basically, jingle bells on a stick used for calling gods at Shinto shrines to conjure light magic onto her opponents. Unexpectedly, all of them are effective against a certain type.
• The Land's Bounty has Halloween Mia using a candy cane as a magic staff, Halloween Kagero using bottles as daggers, and Halloween Niles firing devil forks from his bow.
• Gifts of Winter sees Winter Eirika using a lantern on a stick as a staff and Winter Cecilia tossing gift-filled boots as if they're knives. Ephraim, meanwhile, just decks out his Siegmund.
• While the Nifl siblings in the New Year's of Fire and Ice banner wield practical weapons, the Múspell sisters has New Year's Laevatein wield a Kumade^note A decorated rake used for good luck as a staff while New Year's Laegjarn wields a Wagasa^note A Japanese oil-paper umbrella as a lance.
• Hostile Springs has Bath Ryoma using a hot spring curtain on a stick as a lance, Bath Sakura using a back scratcher as a magic staff, and Bath Elise, Bath Hinoka, and Bath Camilla using rubber duckies, bath buckets and pouches as throwing daggers, respectively.
• Greil's Devotion has Valentine Mist and Valentine Soren attack using baskets of flowers, and Valentine Titania using a flower wreath, as tomes.
• Regal Rabbits has Spring Palla and Spring Marisa wield carrots as daggers and lances, respectively, while Spring Bruno and Spring Veronica use eggs in cups as a staff and tome, respectively.
• In A Season For Picnics, while Picnic Flora uses a knife, Picnic Lukas uses a flagpole as a lance, Picnic Genny uses a marshmallow skewer as a staff, Picnic Felicia uses a saucepan (filled with bad cooking) as an axe, and Picnic Leo uses a basket full of sandwiches, burgers and tomatoes as a tome.
• In Bridal Belonging, while Bridal Fjorm uses a fancy but practical staff and Bridal Louise uses a bow covered in flowers, Bridal Tanith uses a bouquet stand as a lance, Bridal Sigrun uses a cake-cutting knife as a sword, and Bridal Pent uses a wine bottle as a tome.
• In Summer Returns, Summer Gunnthrá uses coconuts as daggers, Summer Laevatein and Summer Laegjarn uses a surfboard and a bottle as a tome, respectively, Summer Helbindi using a shovel as a sword, and Summer Ylgr using a sand rake as an axe.
• In Summer Refreshes, while Lyn and Wolt use bows, Ursula and Lilina uses a seashell and a leaf fan as daggers, respectively, and Fiora uses a parasol as a sword.
• In A Spendid Soiree, while Dancing Berkut wields a practical lance, Dancing Ishtar, Dancing Reinhardt and Dancing Rinea wield chalices as tomes, while Dancing Nephenee wields what appears to be a bow made of two halves of a violin as its limbs.
• In A Monstrous Harvest, while Rolf wields a bow, Halloween Ilyana and Halloween L'Arachel use a lantern and a potion flask as tomes, respectively, Halloween Dozla uses a jack-in-a-box as a dagger, and Halloween Hector uses a candy-themed staff as a sword.
• The elves Peony, Triandra, and Plumeria use flowers in place of tomes. Mirabilis, meanwhile, has her flower styled into a sword.
• In Glorious Gifts, while Winter Duo Marth & Elice wield a decorated bow and Winter Young Zephiel wields a decorated sword, Winter Nino uses a small christmas tree as a tome and Winter Jaffar uses a candy cane as a dagger.
• In Renewed Spirit, while New Year Anna wields a bow, New Year Duo Alfonse & Sharena wield toy tops as a tome, and New Year Eir wields a toy ball as a dagger.
• In Lovely Gifts, while Valentine Rudolf uses a decorated lance, Valentine Faye uses arrows tipped with roses, while Duo Valentine Alm & Celica, Valentine Conrad, and Valentine Silque uses a bouquet of flowers as an axe, sword, and staff, respectively.
• In Familial Festivities, while Spring Idunn uses an egg with dragon decorations to hold her dragonstone and Spring Bartre uses a carrot-shaped sword, Spring Est uses an egg in a cup as a tome, Spring Fir uses a giant carrot as an axe, and Spring Narcian uses a giant golden fork as a lance.
• Among April 2020's refine batch, Regular Gaius gains a bear-shaped lollipop that is used as a dagger.
• In Bridal Beloveds, while Bridal Nailah and Groom Rafiel fight as themselves, Groom Hinata uses a giant folding fan as an axe, and while Bridal Oboro uses a katana, she fights with its scabbard still on. Meanwhile, while Bridal Duo Micaiah & Sothe sees Sothe uses daggers, he doesn't attack at all, while Micaiah, who's doing the actual fighting, uses a bouquet of flowers as a tome, which rains diamonds on her opponent.
• In Summer Passing, while Summer Joshua uses a bow decorated with coral and Summer Lute uses a tome, Summer Sacred Stones Selena uses a coconut drink as a tome, Summer Rhys uses a small palm tree as a staff and Summer Harmonized Mia & Marth uses bamboo watermelon strikers as daggers.
• In Overseas Memories, while Summer Ingrid uses a decorated lance, Summer Dorothea uses tuning forks decorated with flowers as a dagger, Summer Sylvain and Summer Lorenz uses a ice cream melon soda tropical drink and a bouquet in a conch as tomes, respectively, and Summer Duo Female Byleth & Rhea uses soft hammers as a tome.
• In Pirate's Pride, while Pirate Tibarn fights as himself, Pirate Brigid uses a bow decorated as a ship's wheel, Pirate Harmonized Veronica & Xander has the former use an axe shaped as an anchor, Pirate Geese uses a weather vane as a lance and Pirate Darros uses a broom as an axe.
• In To Stay Dreaming, while Dancing Quan uses a bow decorated as a candelabra, Dancing Lachesis and Dancing Ethlyn uses a domino mask and a folding fan as daggers, respectively, Dancing Eldigan uses a candlestand as a lance and Dancing Duo Sigurd & Deirdre uses a goblet as a tome. For extra points, Eldigan's Meet the Heroes description claims that his candlestand is actually a golden staff, which makes it very odd that he's a Lance Flier, not a staff unit.
• In Dragons Harvest, while nearly everyone uses decorated dragonstones, Halloween Xane uses a hand of playing cards as a tome.
• The weapons from In the Moment are pretty realistic in general barring Ninja Laevatein's Twin Star Axe, which is a Fuuma Shuriken split in two and used as a pair of axes.
• The A Festival Miracle, while Winter Harmonized Altina & Sanaki has the former dual wield Ragnell and Alondite and Winter Felix wields a decorated bow shaped as reindeer antlers, Winter Sephiran wields a decorated coathanger stand as a staff, Winter Bernadetta wields a christmas wreath on a stick as a tome and Winter Hilda wields a giant candy cane as a lance.
  • Bernie's deserves a tiny bit of extra mention; since her wreath on a stick IS a magic tome, it does magic things.... specifically, conjuring a house around Bernie herself while a blizzard rages on the enemy.
• In New Year: ω Special Heroes, while New Year Plumeria uses a decorated bow and New Year Velouria, New Year Kaden, and New Year Keaton fight as themselves, New Year Duo Peony & Triandra use a Shimekazari^note A rope wreath decorated with items of good omen, such as an orange or fern leaves, used to hang on the front door to celebrate New Years in Japan and ward away bad spirits as a tome.
• In Dark Desert Rituals, while Plegian Raphael uses a decorated bow and Plegian Male Kris uses an axe with the head in the shape of the Brand of the Defile, Plegian Tharja, Plegian Katarina, and Plegian Harmonized Dorothea & Lene uses a gold oil torch for the former two and a candelabra for the latter as a tome.
• In Love of a King, Valentine Gustav uses a wooden axe decorated with flower, and Valentine Henriette, Valentine Alfonse, Valentine Veronica, and Valentine Duo Líf & Thrasir use flower vases as tomes.
• In Willful Rabbits, while Spring Inigo, Spring Minerva, and Spring Saleh use decorated but practical weapons, and Spring Harmonized Myrrh & Nah has the former transform into a dragon to attack, Spring Severa uses an egg as a tome.
• In Bridal Grace, while Groom Saul uses a staff shaped like a scepter and Bridal Shanna uses a decorated bow, Bridal Juno uses a bouquet of flowers as a tome, Groom Zelot uses a candelabra stand as an axe, and Bridal Harmonized Catria & Thea has Catria uses a wedding bell on a pole as an axe.
• In Summer Vibrance, while Summer Ashe wields a lance (albeit with fish skewered on it) and Summer Leonie uses a bow decorated with sunflowers, Summer Mercedes wields a parfait as a tome that buries the opponent underneath cake, Summer Caspar wields a freshly caught skipjack tuna^note also known as victor fish, which is the name of his weapon as an axe and Summer Duo Hilda & Marianne wield parasols as a staff which, when they attack, directs the sun to burn even brighter and burn the opponent with its rays.
• Legendary Byleth's tome sends in the various lost items from the rest of the cast, as a nod to the mechanic in his home game.
• In Summer's Dream, while both Summer Freyja and Summer Freyr fight as themselves, and Summer Ogma uses a Trident as a lance, Summer Harmonized Caeda & Plumeria uses a pole decorated with two glass dolphins on each side as an axe, and Summer Norne uses a pole tipped with a spiral sea shell as a lance.
• In Perilous Seas, while Pirate Naesala and Pirate Vika fight as themselves, Pirate Surtr uses an anchor-shaped spear and Pirate Duo Hinoka & Camilla has Hinoka use a decorated bow and Camilla using a saber, Pirate Lifis uses a ship's wheel with an extra large peg as an axe.
• When the Gatekeeper of Garreg Mach was chosen as a Brave Hero, he is given a horn in place of a tome...which calls forth the Garreg Mach Monastery gate, out of which comes an assortment of the Three Houses cast to trample the foe.
• In Shared Bounty, Halloween Kurthnaga uses an ornamental paper lantern as a dragonstone, and Halloween Sophia uses a plush toy spider as a tome.
• In Winter Wonderland, while Winter Manuela wields a decorated rapier and Winter Ignatz wields a decorated bow, Winter Mirabilis uses a small snowman as a dagger, Winter Artur uses a snowglobe as a tome, and Harmonized Winter Lysithea & Lute uses a Yule log cake^note a rolled sponge cake shaped into an actual Yule log traditionally made for Christmas as a tome.
• In Like Clockwork, while New Year Lyre and New Year Kyza fight as themselves and New Year Duo Dagr & Nótt has Dagr use a decorated bow and Nótt use an ornate small sword, New Year Reginn uses an O-mikuji box^note O-mikuji are bamboo stick that have a number that matches another box that contains a fortune as a tome and New Year Fáfnir uses flowers on a stick as a dagger.
• In Of Lost Kingdoms, while Hatari Nailah fights as herself, Hatari Karla uses a decorated lance, Hatari Xane uses a decorated staff, and Hatari Deen uses an unusually shaped but practical dagger, Hatari Harmonized Azura & Leanne uses flaming torches as tomes.
• In Here with Me, while Valentine Lucina uses a decorated axe, Valentine Owain uses a decorated lance, Valentine Duo Chrom & Male Robin uses a decorated bow, and Valentine Lissa uses a decorated staff, Valentine Female Robin uses a flower wreath as a tome.
• In Hop-and-Go-Seek, while Spring Maria uses a decorated axe, Spring Henry uses a decorated bow, and Spring Luthier uses a decorated lance, Spring Delthea uses a decorated egg and Spring Harmonized Sonya & Tharja uses cages with bunnies and eggs inside of them as tomes.
• In Bridal Blossoms, while Harmonized Groom Roy & Eliwood bring an axe and spear, respectively, Bridal Lilina, Sophia and Cecilia uses bouquet as tomes, while Bridal Larum uses a bouquet stand as a lance.
• In Summer Vacation, while Summer Elincia uses a decorated bow, Summer Dimitri uses an oar carved to look like Areadbhar as an axe, Summer Micaiah uses a clam shell as a tome, Summer Claude uses popsicles as daggers, and Summer Harmonized Edelgard & Altina has Edelgard use a beach umbrella as a sword while Altina assists with floatie versions of Ragnell and Alondite.
• In Taken by the Tide, while Summer Nifl fights as herself and Summer Seth uses a highly decorated axe, Summer Eirika and Summer Duo Thórr & Loki uses a Nautilus shell and a folding fan as tomes, respectively, and Summer Lyon uses a coral branch as a sword.
• In Risk and Reward, while Thief Sothe uses a dagger with a Calling Card stuck to it, Thief Rickard uses a cane as a sword, Thief Cath and Thief Leila uses a Calling Card and a perfume bottle as a tomes, respectively, and Thief Duo Nina & Kagero has Nina using a feather quill and Kagero using a Calling Card as daggers.
• In Bite of Flame, while Flame Lyn uses a decorated lance, Flame Harmonized Tana & Peony has the former using a hand spear, and Flame Múspell and Flame Mordecai fight as themselves, Flame Rinkah uses a gunbai^note a military leader or sumo judge signaling fan as a sword.
• In Holiday Handoff, Winter Dorothea and Winter Bruno use a filled stocking and a candy cane as tomes respectively.
• In Gods Renewed, while everyone else fight as themselves, New Years Askr carries a filled vessel as a tome.
• Sage of Khadein has some improvised tomes: Khadein Nino wields a magic pendulum-styled compass, Khadein Male Byleth uses a special hourglass, Khadein Soren brings a lantern, Khadein Ursula carries a spherical crystal, and Khadein Linde and her partner Sara use enchanted globes.
• In A Special Gift, Valentine Takumi carries a gift box as a tome, Valentine Effie swings a flower vase on a stick like an axe, and Valentine Elise uses a flower wreath on a stick as a staff.
• In Spring Eternal, Spring Ashe carries an egg with rabbit ears as a dagger, while Spring Triandra uses a colored egg as a tome.
• Bridal Dreams has Bridal Say'ri wield a bouquet with a cherry blossom branch as a lance, while Groom Robin carries a ring in a box as a tome. While Bridal Tiki fights as herself, she nests her dragonstone in a bouquet.

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