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  • "I want you inside me! Oh, um, hey... from before..."
  • When Andy has to clean up after himself in the cafeteria, and he throws the biggest silent hissy fit as picks up every piece.
  • The councilors' Good-Times Montage devolving into beating up old ladies and visiting a crack house.
  • While none of the counselors could be called responsible, Andy and Lindsay are so hilariously apathetic to the campers and their jobs in general that they let two kids drown and left the kids who witnessed it to die in the woods.
  • Gary and J.J.'s dialogue about finding a girl to set McKinley up with. All the girls they suggest are named Debbie, one of whom is his cousin. For bonus points, this occurs simultaneously with McKinley having sex with Ben in a shed—the scenes cut back and forth to each other, and Gary and J.J.'s dialogue even extends into a voiceover.
  • Beth and Neil's attempt to find Victor almost instantly devolves into an over-the-top disaster movie parody, with frequent cuts back to the campers on the river (who aren't actually that near the rapids), needless destruction of the set, and rampant Chewing the Scenery.
    Beth: THE PHONE! THE PHONE! WHERE'S THE FUCKING PHONE?!
  • Allan Shemper's hosting jokes are all just the same quips about how he went to camp a really long time ago. It's so repetitive and uninspired (and the characters find it so incredibly hilarious) that it loops back around to being funny again.
    When I was at camp, my favorite activity was always arts and crafts. Or, as we used to call it, arts and farts and crafts.
    I went to camp so long ago that fucking Jesus Christ was my counselor and my best friend hadn't fully evolved yet!
  • "You're doing it! You're actually doing it!!"
  • "White folks sound so stupid when they get mad. They be like 'Hey asshole, I'm going to kick your behind.' But the brothers won't even need to raise their voice. These motherfuckers be like "Don't make me say it twice!'"
    • "That's true, that's true." "I hate white people!"
    • The fact that not only are all these characters white, but the one doing the standup looks to be at most thirteen years old.
  • "Before we start, I'd just like to say the campers you're about to see suck dick. But nevertheless, please welcome them."
    • This precedes a performance of "Day By Day" from Godspell which is actually very good for what's supposed to be a kids talent show, and there are repeated cuts to the audience, who are clearly enjoying it... Until immediately after the song ends, at which point everyone vehemently boos.
  • "Look, Gene, I've never told anyone this before...but I can suck my own dick...and I do it.....a lot."
  • The alternate fart track on the DVD.

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