Funny / Tim Minchin

  • Take your pick; his own favourite is Peace Anthem For Palestine, whose one verse is:
    You don't eat pigs
    We don't eat pigs
    It seems it's been that way for ever
    So if you don't eat pigs
    And we don't eat pigs
    Why not not-eat-pigs together?
  • The ending of Canvas Bags.
    Tim: BLACKOUT! Fuck yeah!
  • The monotonous, completely deadpan way he sings the opening line of Some People Have It Worse Than I.
    Tim: Well, I wake up in the morning at 11:47 and I can't believe I have to face the horror of another fucking day.
  • The line in 'Thank You God (For Fixing The Cataracts of Sam's Mum)'
    Fuck me, Sam! What are the odds?!
  • From the Darkside Live album, just after the second chorus, the audience starts to clap along to the beat. Tim's about to launch into a solo, and he isn't pleased with the sudden participation.
    Tim: People always start clapping then, but I'm about to do a solo and I can't keep time. *beat* So shut the fuck up.
    • Another instance of Dark Side's solo clapping gets an especially dry reaction from Tim when the audience claps out of time with his playing.
    Tim: Ah yeah, off-beat. Wicked.
  • The entirety of Storm. This troper's favorite bit is when he rhymes "Carbon" with "Hard-on".
  • In Song for Wossy, he concludes a line with 'I wanna make sweet love to ya, sweet love to ya wife." The look on Ross's face was priceless.
  • Stone Her to Death!
  • Five Poofs and Two Pianos
  • Tim Minchin and the Heritage Orchestra: Free Jazz!
    • When he talks to the audience:
    Audience Member: WE LOVE YOU!
    Tim: It's nice to see that you already nominated a spokesperson. And the consensus seems to be that you love me. That's incredible, that's, oh fuck off. Let's just skip the pleasantries and have an enormous orgy.
    • Oh this, this is my orchestra.
    It's nice to finally have my orchestra. I've always felt deep down that at the very least I deserve an entire symphony orchestra.
    • William and Kate got married the day of one of the performances:
    The good thing about the royal wedding... *beat* Speaking of things I don't care about, this is my band!
    • Tim screwing with the conductor. And asking an audience member to rub one out in order to see if a spell he performed worked. Or at least tweet him the results.
    • The amazingly large number of statistics fans in the audience.
    • Tim has two guilty pleasures: wine because the money he spends on it could go towards immunizing children in poor countries (which is why he savors it) and cheese.
    • Before the Tear Jerker that is "Beauty", Tim had this to say:
    The next song is about my is about doing this (performing) and only really applies to me—or other people with the same experiences as me—so it's rather self-indulgent. Which is really saying something considering I just performed a 7 1/2 minute song about cheese.
    • Before performing the final song, Tim comments that he has always ended the show with the same song ("Darkside") and has been trying to come up with a better one and earlier that year he finally gave up.
    • During the "Darkside": Free Jazz!
    Bassoon Solo!
  • After performing the Pope Song, a piano company in Dallas refused to let him actually borrow one, calling him a "God-hater" and "a demon".
  • Tim's improvisational skills have keen timing as well - before playing "If I Didn't Have You" in Canada, his stand-up recieved an out-of-place "Woo!" following a string of digits. After calling the audience member "Rainman" he went on to perform "If I Didn't Have You", and then drilled into the aforementioned audience member with his eyes when he got to the "9.999 hundred thousand other loves" line.