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The Whole Nine Yards

  • Oz enters his hotel room and finds Frankie waiting for him. When Frankie asks about Jimmy, Oz denies knowledge and Frankie apologizes about the confusion and starts to leave... only to sucker punch Oz in the gut. Then, as Oz is being help up by him, Frankie asks again. Cue a couple more gut shots before Oz finally agrees to go talk to Janni.
    Oz: Do you mind if I piss a little blood first?
    Frankie: Please, by all means.
    Oz: Thanks.
  • After a call from Jimmy, who casually lets Oz know that he knows he's down ratting Jimmy out to Janni, Oz calmly walks into the bathroom and lowers to his knees to vomit in the toilet.
    • Which shortly becomes a Brick Joke when Cynthia arrives to see him and can tell he's vomited recently when she gets too close to him, and they agree he should go gargle.
  • Oz entering the hotel room with Frankie only to see Jimmy, try to run out, bounce off Frankie, fall over behind a couch and smash a lamp.
  • Oz deciding he's had enough of Jimmy and Jill's conversation and trying to make a stand and leave.
  • Jill, Jimmy, and Frankie's reactions to finding out that Oz slept with Cynthia:
    Jimmy: FIND OUT WHERE HE IS! [into phone] JUST STAY RIGHT THERE!
    Jill: [into phone] Oz, you stud, you!
    Frankie: Gonna be a dead stud.
    • Then after Jimmy's calmed down (slightly):
      Jimmy: I'll tell you one thing, you got balls.
      Oz: Yeah. Who knew?
  • Frankie congratulating Oz for cuckolding Jimmy:
    Frankie: By the way... [grabs his crotch] Huevos grandes, amigo!
  • Oz's wife doing a terrible job of explaining to the police how she was caught in a sting op hiring a cop to assassinate her husband. And Oz watching and not giving a shit.
    Oz: This would be sad if it wasn't so pathetic.
  • Jimmy becomes a Shipper on Deck for his ex-wife and Oz - mainly because "love for you means money for me... and like I said before, I'd really hate to have to kill you."
  • When Jimmy, Oz, and Frankie are on the boat, and Jimmy shoots Frankie with no warning.
    Oz: Why, why did you kill him?!
    Jimmy: Well, I had to kill one of you. [casually tosses gun over the side]
    Oz: Well, then you definitely made the decision... but why did you have to kill him?!
    • Then gets funnier when Jimmy casually digs a beer out of the cooler and tosses it to Oz - who is BSOD'ing so hard that he lets it go past him without even noticing - his eyes don't track it in the slightest.

The Whole Ten Yards

  • The second film doesn't have as many, but this is gold: Julie, Oz's receptionist, jumps Jimmy and chloroforms him.
    Oz: Who are you!?
    Julie: Jules. Jules Figueroa. Ring any bells?
    Oz: Frankie Figs?
    Julie: Yeah. Frankie Figs. He was my brother, and I'm pretty sure you knew him.
    Oz: (Beat. Remembers Jimmy killed Frankie) ...Okay, I'll take that chloroform now.
    Julie: Yeah, I know you will! [she gasses him]
  • Earlier, when Oz has Lazlo Gogolak on the phone:
    Lazlo: You locked my son in the trunk?!
    Oz: No! No, sir! He locked himself in there.
    [Lazlo mulls that for a second.]
    Lazlo: This I believe.

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