Funny / The Lost Fleet

  • Geary's description, in a conversation with Captain Duellos, of his arrival with Captain Desjani to meet her parents ... while trying to dodge the media and government big noises. As Duellos put it, "I've seen movies like this." They probably starred someone comparable to Leslie Nielsen or Eddie Murphy.
    "We made it to the high-rise where Tanya's parents lived, and it was one of those secured-access places, so we jumped out of the car, ran up to the access panel, and Tanya pounded on it, yelling, 'They changed the access code! Mom, Dad, let us in!'"
    • Tanya's mother to her daughter upon recognizing her new son-in-law:
    "You're trying to kill me aren't you? Were you hoping for a stroke or a heart attack?"
  • The ending of Victorious becomes subtly humorous when you realize that it's basically the classic Rom Com ending transposed into The Lost Fleet series. Love interest leaving main character behind? Check. Mad dash through crowds and security to make it to her terminal in time? Check. Anguished declaration of love? Check. On the spot marriage proposal? Check. Fortunately, it doesn't come off as terribly silly as it might, given that it's all justified in-universe. Which, frankly, makes it funnier.
  • Geary breaking new ground in masculine cluelessness as he wonders why suddenly his love-interest cum political advisor and his female flag captain can't stand each other. It can't have anything to do with him!
  • Rione on an obstructive fleet captain: "Numos is so dense that I'm surprised he doesn't have his own event horizon."
  • Geary to a ship trying bull another aside: "Audacious, be advised that if you are attempting to mate with Resolution, you might try buying her a few drinks first." When they sheepishly move back into position, the response is "''Resolution wishes to report that her virtue is unharmed."
  • In Invincible, negotiations with the spider-wolves get confusing when the aliens start demanding a "Universal fixing substance." None of the higher-ups have any idea what this is referring to, but in a moment of brilliance, Geary gathers the chiefs together and asks them. The unanimous response? Duct tape.
  • "Admiral, would you please stop discovering new alien species."
  • Desjani is describing the dream in which she saw John Geary sleeping in the cold dark of his survival capsule:
    "I saw you in the dream and I yelled at you."
    Geary: Your reaction on seeing me was to yell at me? That I have no trouble believing."
  • Captain Badaya's glee at having foiled Fleet Headquarters gambit to incite the fleet into a coup'detat - specifically, which he did by obeying orders and not acting like a loose cannon.
  • General Charban's despair over trying to get a straight answer out of the Dancers:
    "I asked them why they were here. The brief response said 'we are on a mission'. What Mission? An 'important mission'. Admiral, why don't you shoot me now and put me out of my misery?"
  • Geary realizing that one of the staff officers serving in his auxiliary fleet deserves a commendation and wondering how he's supposed to write it up: The thing he needs to commend Lieutenant Jamensen for is her talent for writing extremely confusing but technically accurate reports so that the upper brass will leave the fleet alone and let them do their job.
  • When looking for help in tracking down and recovering two kidnapped officers, one agency gives a response so obnoxiously bureaucratic that Desjani requests permission to blow up their headquarters on their way out of the system. Geary reluctantly states that there's probably some form they'd have to fill out first, and they don't have time to wait for approval to come through.