Funny / The Arcana

Per wiki policy, Spoilers Off applies here and all spoilers are unmarked. You Have Been Warned.

Asra

• When the apprentice finds Asra through the fountain's water, his expression looks incredibly baffled.
• In a flashback, Asra tries to help the apprentice pick out an outfit for the Masquerade and the apprentice teases Asra for trying to offer them a bright purple dress with leopard spots on them. Asra laughs and says that the apprentice would look good in anything.
• Asra's reaction when the Magician Tarot figure takes the form of himself, and asks the apprentice if they could tell which was real one.
• After getting locked up with Julian, he asks why he went through all of this trouble just to talk and Julian said it was on a "whim". Asra seems more enraged that Julian had ruined his night with the apprentice than being thrown in jail on the accusation of murdering Lucio and being Julian's accomplice.
  • Asra angrily argues that he's not that hard to find, before pausing and turning to the apprentice and asking to confirm if that was true or not. If you admit that Asra usually never tells you where he goes, he gets silent.
• Asra attempting to run over and hug the apprentice, forgetting that he's connected to Julian on one long chain. This leads to Julian being pulled up against the wall and Asra just inches away from the apprentice.
• During the coliseum match with Muriel Julian asks why Muriel's line wasn't more dramatic.
  Asra: We didn't all go to community theater.
• After Julian's condemened to murder, and Asra and the apprentice head back to the Palace the two later go to meet Julian.
  Julian: I hear the blood of a hanged man is excellent for magic.
  Asra: (smirks) Yes, good for summoning chimeras.
  Julian: (shocked) Really?
  Asra: (angrily) No.
• Asra's fury when he finds that Julian wrote in his book and nearly tore page 394.
• The apprentice wishing Julian good luck in meeting the Hanged Man he says, "Of course, or else I won't get to gloat over it." This even brings out a little chuckle from Asra himself.
• In Julian's route, he asks why he stole one of his books, and Julia sheepishly says he was trying to figure out how to cure the plague, while attempting to be helpful and make notes in the book.
  Asra: By getting inkstains all over it and dog-earing all the pages?
  • Asra's look of pure rage when he points out beforehand that Julian took his book without his permission.
  Asra: And made... additions to.
• Asra telling Julian to stall a revived Lucio.
  Asra: Just be a pain in his ass!
  Julian: Why didn't you say so? That I can do.

Nadia

• Nadia orders the guards from the front gate who were rude to you to dress up like animals for the apprentice to chase, a rabbit and a deer.
  • In later chapters, she notes how the one guard dressed as a deer doesn't at all like the costume.
• When visiting the town if you choose to go to the coliseum, but don't choose to follow Nadia she returns with a happy smile on her face saying, "I just purchased a cheetah".
  • At the beginning of the chapter, people begin to crowd around the royal carriage in awe, and Nadia wonders if even the most plain carriage she could find wasn't enough to not draw attention (it was still plenty royal looking).
• Vlastomil's worms, to Nadia's chagrin. So much so that she and the apprentice become a Battle Couple in order to take down the worms.
• There's something mildly amusing about the apprentice meeting all of Nadia's sisters, especially Nahara who seems to be sizing the apprentice up and probably wondering, "Are you good enough for my little sister?"
• After Valerius breaks his wine glass in anger Nadia quips about how he was so clumsy with his wine.
  • Then Valerius snipes at the other council members for being so useless, leading to a rather hilarious line from Vulgora.
  Vulgora: YOU TAKE THAT BACK I AM EXTREMELY CALM AND PUT TOGETHER!!
  • Volta quietly admits that Vulgora does yell a lot, leading them to yell, "I HAVE NEVER ONCE YELLED BEFORE IN MY LIFE!!"
• Volta crying to Nadia and asking to not be kicked out of the Masquerade's feast tonight, and Nadia calms her by saying she was still allowed to come.
  Vulgora: WHAT ABOUT ME?!
  Nadia: ...............No.
• After Julian refuses to talk to either you, or Nadia, Portia comes by and Nadia tells her that she knew that Julian was her brother. She then asks Portia to go speak to Julian in her steed, since he wouldn't open up to her or the apprentice.
  Portia: Believe me, I have a LOT to say to him.
• Once you get Nadia to the realm of the High Priestess she asks if you would want to go swimming with her. The apprentice blushes and says they didn't bring a swimsuit, with Nadia pointing out it would just be the two of you so it wouldn't matter if you were naked. The free answer has the apprentice say, "I'm afraid of sea monsters."
• Nadia and the others ignoring and simply walking away from Lucio like a group of adults paying no mind to a petulant child.
  • He then addresses the spirit of the apprentice.
  Lucio: Well, it's not like YOU can go anywhere-
  Apprentice: (Follows Nadia and the others out of the ballroom, leaving Lucio to shriek in frustration)
• The paid option to set fire to Lucio's last portrait leads to Nadia pretending to be sad about this "accident".
  Nadia: That was the last portrait of you left in the palace, too. What a shame...\\
  Lucio: WHAT?! What happened to the rest of them?!
  Nadia: (pretending to look at her nails) Oh, I had them all destroyed. They were clashing with my curtains.
  Lucio: (shrieks in rage and tries to strangle you, forgetting that you exist between planes, and can't be touched)
  Asra: What are you doing, Lucio? Trying to fight the air?
  Lucio: Don't lie to me! You know [they're] right here!
  Asra: I don't see anyone but you making a fool of yourself, Lucio.
  Muriel: ...He does that a lot.
  Nadia: He does, doesn't he? Don't you think you're being a little dramatic, Lucio?
  • Nadia giving this fantastic burn to Lucio:
  Nadia: I'd stay away from the flames were I you. We all know how... flammable you are.
  • If you didn't choose the paid option, Nadia tells you that the next time Lucio badmouths you, you have no reason to hold back in kicking him in the ass.

Julian

• Amongst the available love interests, Julian has plenty of humorous moments almost to the point of him being a bit of a Butt-Monkey.
• In one chapter, Julian accidentally winds up on stage during a play that mockingly reenacts Lucio's murder. Julian is forced to improvise As Himself.
  Community Theater Lucio: What are you going to do, smother me with your thighs?
  Julian: For the hundredth time, no.
• Portia and apprentice look for Julian, and when they find him in a tavern, he's pretty much close to blacking out.
  • Julian says that he kept ordering a drink called "Salty Bitters", and noted that it tasted horrible.
  • Portia gives you the option to either let the apprentice kick him in the ass, or allow her to.
• When trying to sneak Julian into Nadia's palace, the apprentice casts a glamor over Julian so he looks like Asra. His reaction says it all.
  Julian: (As Asra, giving his signature smirk) I'm definitely too drunk for this.
  • As they eventually stumble upon Nadia and the servants cleaning up Lucio's room, Julian can barely stay in character (with what little character he can muster), and before they leave, he smirks.
• A merchant in the underground coliseum tries to sell the apprentice items that Muriel supposedly possessed as a gladiator, that the apprentice quickly picks out as fake. From a knife that he claimed Muriel used to kill people (it was a cheese knife) to his underwear (it wasn't his) and then a comb (that also wasn't his). Finally, once the apprentice found something that actually belonged to Muriel, Julian pays the man with a sack of gold. As the two walk off, the merchant screams that the money was fake, leading the two to book it out of the market. Once outside, Julian laughs and notes that the pirate must have stiffed him.
• There something so jarring about Julian appearing at the end of Chapter X, purposefully showing himself to Nadia and her guards, whilst loudly declaring for her to arrest him.
• Julian absolutely hamming it when putting on a show in the coliseum match against Muriel.
• When the apprentice sees him again after his trial, he's so reluctant to talk about his declaration of guilt that he tries to make a run for it, forgetting that he's chained to the table. Looks like Nadia came in prepared.
  • Julian trying to avoid everyone's questions by diverting his attention to the feast in front of him. It doesn't work.

Muriel

• After Muriel gifts you with myrrh so you won't forget him again, you have the option of thanking him or teasing him. If you choose the teasing option, "Good, you're too cute to forget", it causes him to get flustered and declaring that he was going to revoke your food away.
• At an inn that the others stop at for the night, the innkeeper Mr. Withers who comes off as a Shipper on Deck for Muriel and the apprentice claims to only have one room available that night. This leads to Muriel and the apprentice discovering that There Is Only One Bed.
  • If the apprentice offers to share the bed with Muriel, Muriel's expression reads as if the apprentice offered for the two of them to get naked and dance.
• Muriel's names for his chickens? Bawkbawk, Cluckie and Bawkcluck.
• When you use the water communication spell to contract Vesuvia after Morga's death, you land right in the middle of an argument between Asra and Julian.
  Asra: Ilya, that's a terrible idea. We're not doing that.
  Julian: Well it's better than breaking and entering, isn't it? Last time I tried that, you got mad!
  Asra: Because it was MY SHOP you were breaking into!
• The paid option of the apprentice, Muriel and Natiqa prank Julian with a giant chicken.
  • He's later recounting this tale to Asra and he swears that what he just experienced was real.
  The Apprentice [narrating]: I manage to catch the words 'chicken', 'escaped with my life,' and 'not lying, Asra!'
• During the Masquerade, Muriel can get the option to try some foods to see which he likes. When trying cantaloupe, the apprentice has the option of being affronted, or agreeing with Muriel not liking it. As he tries caviar, his sprite shows him looking surprised as he asks, "It pops?"
• Nadia asks for Muriel to talk to the refugees outside his hut which he isn't up for saying he doesn't like talking to people.
  Apprentice: You talk to me!
  Muriel: You're weird, you don't count.
• Consul Valerius managing to make it to Muriel's hut, disheveled and the furthest image away from the idea of nobility. There's even a leaf in his wine glass. If you choose to help him on your first choice, you manage to pull him out of the mud, but one of his shoes gets stuck.
  Valerius: These were couture!
  • However, if you refuse to help him and feign walking away, he starts getting flustered. He then tells you he has information for Nadia which leads Muriel to walk over, hold him under the arms "like a child" and pulls him out of the mud.
• Asra, Muriel, Julian, and the Apprentice sneaking into the city is full of very funny moments. When Julian first appears in disguise is particularly good.
  Julian: Call me... Julio!
  Apprentice: Okay, Julian.
  Muriel: ...This is going to be a disaster.
• There is an optional scene where the Apprentice, disguised as Lucio, does an exaggerated impression of him to cheer Muriel up. Then Muriel, disguised as Valdemar, does an impression of them.
  Muriel: Well I, the... creepy Valdemar, am personally disappointed.
• If you choose to brag to the kid at the Rowdy Raven, Muriel hurriedly starts trying to downplay what the two of you have accomplished, causing Asra to break in with, "Don't sell yourself short, Muriel. You're too tall for that!"
• When Asra and Julian are fighting Lucio's mercenaries together, they spend the whole time bantering back and forth, which confuses the enemy.
  Julian: How am I supposed to do cool backflips while I'm ducking?
  Asra: I'm sure you'll figure something out. You're plenty good at evading problems.

Portia

• Portia teasing the apprentice when the two of them hide in a nearby closet to avoid some passing guards.
• This exchange from Julian's trial:
  Valerius: Is Julian capable of murder?
  Asra: Well, he did murder some perfectly good drinking songs back in the day.
• In the paid option when trying to cheer Portia up after it's revealed that Tasya destroyed half of the city so she could get a chance at immortality, the apprentice whips on a dark cape pretending to act like a cult member. They then brandish an item that has Portia blushing and what's described as an "unfortunately-shaped black candle".

Lucio

• As Lucio bargains with the apprentice to change him back to his normal form, he asks if they apprentice keep his fur cape since he was partial to the fur. One of the apprentice's choices leads to them saying how Lucio's ghost form is already covered in fur.
• Lucio attempting to prank a employee of the castle by taking the feather from their hat. If you chose to stop him, he'll pout about how the feather would look better on him. If you don't, he'll take the feather and tickle the man's nose. When he puts the feather on, he decides that it better suits the apprentice and puts it on them. The apprentice then makes note of how horribly the feather clashes with their outfit.