- One time Joan's phone rings with stirring, inspirational music, like what would announce the arrival of a king...she looks at the caller ID and it clearly says "GOD."
Joan: Haha, very funny!God: I thought so.
- Before Joan believes she's actually talking to God, she's skeptical.
God: Okay...how about that?Joan: ...that's a tree.God: Let's see you make one.
- From the pilot:
Luke: What you do is you shoot these photons at this piece of paper-Joan: There's a pervert in the yard!Luke: -and a pervert appears in the yard!
- "Wealth of Nations"
Adam: You stole from the homeless?!Joan: I know I'm a terrible person.Adam: Yeah!Joan: Well, you weren't supposed to say that!
- "Thanks for leaving a message with my father the rabbi saying you wanted to spend the night with me building a gun!"
- "Don't scare the cripple! My fight or flight impulse is very confused!"
- God appears in the form of twin girls...
Joan: I thought we were going with monotheism.God Girls: I'm impressed you know what that is.