- Allison tries to get her brothers to call her Albert when they meet one of Dad's friends while camping. They don't listen.
- When her dad forces her to get dressed for a wedding, she asks if she can wear sneakers with her sailor's suit.
- While in college, Allison took a course on Ulysses. She ended up blowing off most of the reading, and in her words, bullshat through her exam.
- Right before her first sexual encounter, Joan Performs a "Shut Up" Kiss to Middle Allison and her reaction is priceless.
- When Bruce finds a dead mouse in a box of old antiques, Small Allison gladly takes it in.
Bruce: [disgusted] Ugh, dead mouse.
Small Allison: [excited] Oh, Oh! Can I have it?
Bruce: ...It's all yours.
- Regular Allison has this golden line.
Allison: Caption: My dad and I are exactly alike!
Allison: Caption, my dad and I are nothing alike.
- Middle Allison's awkward yet Adorkable sing-song rambles are bound to get a chuckle out of some.
Middle Allison: Joan I feel like Hercules! — Oh GOD that sounds ridiculous!