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-->'''Barnabas:''' You may strategically place your wonderful lips upon my posterior and kiss it repeatedly!

to:

-->'''Barnabas:''' You I have prepared my counter-proposal, it reads thusly: you may strategically place your wonderful lips upon my posterior and kiss it repeatedly!
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Index wick removal


* Barnabas' scene with the hippies. [[AcceptableTargets Especially the end]].

to:

* Barnabas' scene with the hippies. [[AcceptableTargets Especially the end]].end.
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* Behind-the-scenes example: When Denise Nickerson, who played both Amy Jennings/Nora Collins in the original series, and Violet Beauregarde in ''Film/WillyWonkaAndTheChocolateFactory'', noted Creator/JohnnyDepp starring in both the ''Film/DarkShadows'' movie and ''Film/CharlieAndTheChocolateFactory'', she made jokes in interviews not after about Depp being obsessed with her career.

to:

* Behind-the-scenes example: When Denise Nickerson, who played both Amy Jennings/Nora Collins in the original series, and Violet Beauregarde in ''Film/WillyWonkaAndTheChocolateFactory'', noted Creator/JohnnyDepp starring in both the ''Film/DarkShadows'' movie and ''Film/CharlieAndTheChocolateFactory'', she made jokes in interviews not long after about Depp being obsessed with her career.

Added: 1833

Changed: 1994

Removed: 1890

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! The film:

to:

! The '''WARNING:''' Spoilers are unmarked.
----
!The
film:
* The first thing Barnabas sees after being released (and slaking his thirst)? [[UsefulNotes/McDonalds A large golden symbol]] that quite resembles one he had found in a book about the Devil.
-->'''Barnabas:''' Mephistopheles!
* When Elizabeth finds Barnabas talking with Carolyn and David and demands to know what's going on, Carolyn says "I'm pretty sure he called me a hooker."
** Barnabas then gives her a look of confusion.
* Barnabas and Angelique meeting again:
-->'''Angelique:''' Barnabas, get over it.
-->'''Barnabas:''' LOCKED IN A BOX! For 200 years!
-->'''Angelique:''' Don't exaggerate. It was only 196.



--> '''Hoffman:''' Do you know what doctor/patient confidentiality is? (''descends crotch-wise'')
* During the climax when Elizabeth realizes her daughter [[spoiler:is a werewolf]], Carolyn gives her the most deadpan expression ([[LeaningOnTheFourthWall at the camera]]) and says:
--> '''Carolyn:''' I'm [[spoiler:a werewolf]], okay? Let's not make a big deal about it.
--> ''({{Beat}})''
--> '''Carolyn:''' [[spoiler:Woof!]]
* The first thing Barnabas sees after being released (and slaking his thirst)? [[UsefulNotes/McDonalds A large, golden symbol]] that quite resembles one he had found in a book about the Devil.
--> Mephistopheles!

to:

--> '''Hoffman:''' -->'''Hoffman:''' ''[to Barnabas]'' Do you know what doctor/patient confidentiality is? (''descends crotch-wise'')
''[descends crotch-wise]''
* During the climax when Elizabeth realizes her daughter [[spoiler:is Carolyn is a werewolf]], werewolf, Carolyn gives her the most deadpan expression ([[LeaningOnTheFourthWall at the camera]]) and says:
--> '''Carolyn:''' -->'''Carolyn:''' I'm [[spoiler:a werewolf]], a werewolf, okay? Let's not make a big deal about it.
--> ''({{Beat}})''
--> '''Carolyn:''' [[spoiler:Woof!]]
* The first thing Barnabas sees after being released (and slaking his thirst)? [[UsefulNotes/McDonalds A large, golden symbol]] that quite resembles one he had found in a book about the Devil.
--> Mephistopheles!
-->''[{{Beat}}]''
-->'''Carolyn:''' Woof!



-->'''Barnabas''': What kind of sorcery is this? (''rips an input cord out'') Reveal yourself, tiny songstress!

to:

-->'''Barnabas''': -->'''Barnabas:''' What kind of sorcery is this? (''rips ''[rips an input cord out'') out]'' Reveal yourself, tiny songstress!



--> '''Barnabas''': [[TakeThat This is a very silly play]].

to:

--> '''Barnabas''': --->'''Barnabas:''' [[TakeThat This is a very silly play]].



* When Angelique tries to make Barnabas take her back. Doubly funny because it makes Barnabas drop his SesquipedalianLoquaciousness act:
-->'''Angelique:''' What if I made you?
-->'''Barnabas:''' With what, a spell? A little doll filled with pins? That is not love.
-->'''Angelique:''' ''[rips her suit off]'' [[IHaveBoobsYouMustObey With THIS!]]
-->'''Barnabas:''' '''[[DistractedByTheSexy Oh]]'''.
** "I-I-I must admit, they have not aged a day."
** Even before the bodice rip, Barnabas's facial reactions to Angelique taking his hand to fondle her with. He seems quite...content with it.
* Barnabas asking Carolyn for some love advice. It's impossible for that setup to ''not'' be hilarious.
-->'''Barnabas:''' What is your age, if I may?
-->'''Carolyn:''' Fifteen.
-->'''Barnabas:''' Fifteen and no husband? You must put those birthing hips to use at once, lest your womb shrivel up and die!
-->'''Carolyn:''' You're weird.
** The priceless moment when Barnabas recites The Steve Miller Band's "The Joker" as ''poetry''! And then compares it favorably to ''Shakespeare''! [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a5d9IrjGNcA Heck, just listen to it.]]
* Barnabas' scene with the hippies. [[AcceptableTargets Especially the end]].



--> '''Barnabas''': (''watching Cooper perform'') Ugliest woman I've ever seen.
* Barnabas' scene with the hippies. [[AcceptableTargets Especially the end]].
* Barnabas's response to Angelique's proposal. "You may strategically place your wonderful lips upon my posterior and kiss it repeatedly!"
* The following:
--> '''Angelique:''' Barnabas, get over it.
--> '''Barnabas:''' LOCKED IN A BOX! For 200 years!
--> '''Angelique:''' Don't exaggerate. It was only 196.
* Barnabas asking Carolyn for some love advice. It's impossible for that setup to ''not'' be hilarious.
-->'''Barnabas:''' What is your age, if I may?
-->'''Carolyn:''' Fifteen.
-->'''Barnabas:''' Fifteen and no husband? You must put those birthing hips to use at once, lest your womb shrivel up and die!
-->'''Carolyn:''' You're weird.
* That priceless moment when Barnabas recites The Steve Miller Band's "The Joker" as ''poetry''! And then compares it favorably to ''Shakespeare''!
** [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a5d9IrjGNcA Heck, just listen to it.]]
* "I'm pretty sure he called me a hooker."
* When Barnabas is locked in a coffin for the second time...
-->'''Barnabas:''' (''hearing footsteps'') I hear you! Come! Do not fear!
-->''The coffin lid opens.''
-->'''Barnabas:''' Oh thank goodness! What year is it? How many decades have passed?
-->'''David:''' It's been twenty minutes. (''beat'') Why do you have ladies' underwear on your face?
-->'''Barnabas:''' Never mind that.
* When Angelique tries to make Barnabas take her back. Doubly funny because it makes Barnabas drop his SesquipedalianLoquaciousness act:
-->'''Angelique:''' What if I made you?
-->'''Barnabas:''' With what, a spell? A little doll filled with pins? That is not love.
-->'''Angelique:''' (''rips her suit off'') [[IHaveBoobsYouMustObey With THIS!]]
-->'''Barnabas:''' '''[[DistractedByTheSexy Oh]]'''.
** "I-I-I must admit, they have not aged a day."
** Even before the bodice rip, Barnabas's...facial reactions to Angelique taking his hand to fondle her with. He seems quite...content with it.
* Angelique: "Command"? You make me sick! ''*projectile vomits* ''
** Barnabas: ''*ducks*'' Missed me. ''*splat*''
*** The old cleaning woman even starts to wipe it off his face, but [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere gives up]] when she sees the bugs in the mess.
* At the party the old woman is sitting right in front of a speaker just reading and not even being aware of the music coming from it.
* Meta example: When Denise Nickerson, former child actress who played both Amy Jennings/Nora Collins in the original series, and Violet Beauregarde in ''Film/WillyWonkaAndTheChocolateFactory'' noted Johnny Depp starring in both the ''Film/DarkShadows'' movie and ''Film/CharlieAndTheChocolateFactory'', she made jokes in interviews not not after about Depp being obsessed with her career.

to:

--> '''Barnabas''': (''watching -->'''Barnabas:''' ''[watching Cooper perform'') perform]'' Ugliest woman I've ever seen.
* Barnabas' scene with At the hippies. [[AcceptableTargets Especially party, the end]].
old cleaning woman is sitting right in front of a speaker just reading and not even being aware of the music coming from it.
* Barnabas's response to Angelique's proposal. "You proposal:
-->'''Barnabas:''' You
may strategically place your wonderful lips upon my posterior and kiss it repeatedly!"
* The following:
--> '''Angelique:''' Barnabas, get over it.
--> '''Barnabas:''' LOCKED IN A BOX! For 200 years!
--> '''Angelique:''' Don't exaggerate. It was only 196.
* Barnabas asking Carolyn for some love advice. It's impossible for that setup to ''not'' be hilarious.
-->'''Barnabas:''' What is your age, if I may?
-->'''Carolyn:''' Fifteen.
-->'''Barnabas:''' Fifteen and no husband? You must put those birthing hips to use at once, lest your womb shrivel up and die!
-->'''Carolyn:''' You're weird.
* That priceless moment when Barnabas recites The Steve Miller Band's "The Joker" as ''poetry''! And then compares it favorably to ''Shakespeare''!
** [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a5d9IrjGNcA Heck, just listen to it.]]
* "I'm pretty sure he called me a hooker."
repeatedly!
* When Barnabas is locked in a coffin for the second time...
time.
-->'''Barnabas:''' (''hearing footsteps'') ''[hearing footsteps]'' I hear you! Come! Do not fear!
-->''The -->''[The coffin lid opens.''
opens]''
-->'''Barnabas:''' Oh Oh, thank goodness! What year is it? How many decades have passed?
-->'''David:''' It's been twenty minutes. (''beat'') ''[{{beat}}]'' Why do you have ladies' underwear on your face?
-->'''Barnabas:''' Never mind that.
that!
* When Angelique tries to make Barnabas take her back. Doubly funny because it makes Barnabas drop his SesquipedalianLoquaciousness act:
During the final battle:
-->'''Angelique:''' What if I made you?
"Command?" You make me sick! ''[projectile vomits]''
-->'''Barnabas:''' With what, a spell? A little doll filled with pins? That is not love.
-->'''Angelique:''' (''rips her suit off'') [[IHaveBoobsYouMustObey With THIS!]]
-->'''Barnabas:''' '''[[DistractedByTheSexy Oh]]'''.
** "I-I-I must admit, they have not aged a day."
** Even before
''[dodges out of the bodice rip, Barnabas's...facial reactions to Angelique taking his hand to fondle her with. He seems quite...content with it.
* Angelique: "Command"? You make me sick! ''*projectile vomits* ''
** Barnabas: ''*ducks*''
way]'' Missed me. ''*splat*''
***
me.
-->''[Angelique vomits again and gets Barnabas in the face]''
**
The old cleaning woman even starts to wipe it the venom off his face, but [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere gives up]] when she sees the bugs in the mess.
* At the party the old woman is sitting right in front of a speaker just reading and not even being aware of the music coming from it.
* Meta
Behind-the-scenes example: When Denise Nickerson, former child actress who played both Amy Jennings/Nora Collins in the original series, and Violet Beauregarde in ''Film/WillyWonkaAndTheChocolateFactory'' ''Film/WillyWonkaAndTheChocolateFactory'', noted Johnny Depp Creator/JohnnyDepp starring in both the ''Film/DarkShadows'' movie and ''Film/CharlieAndTheChocolateFactory'', she made jokes in interviews not not after about Depp being obsessed with her career.
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* Meta example: When Denise Nickerson, former child actress who played both Amy Jennings/Nora Collins in the original series, and Violet Beauregarde in ‘’Film/WillyWonkaAndTheChocolateFactory’’ noted Johnny Depp starring in both the ‘’Dark Shadows’’ movie and ‘’Film/CharlieAndTheChocolateFactory’’, she made jokes in interviews not not after about Depp being obsessed with her career.

to:

* Meta example: When Denise Nickerson, former child actress who played both Amy Jennings/Nora Collins in the original series, and Violet Beauregarde in ‘’Film/WillyWonkaAndTheChocolateFactory’’ ''Film/WillyWonkaAndTheChocolateFactory'' noted Johnny Depp starring in both the ‘’Dark Shadows’’ ''Film/DarkShadows'' movie and ‘’Film/CharlieAndTheChocolateFactory’’, ''Film/CharlieAndTheChocolateFactory'', she made jokes in interviews not not after about Depp being obsessed with her career.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


* Meta example: When Denise Nickerson, former child actress who played both Amy Jennings/Nora Collins in the original series, and Violet Beauregarde in ‘’Film/WillyWonkaAndTheChocolateFactory’’ noted Johnny Depp starring in both the ‘’Dark Shadows’’ movie and ‘’Film/CharlieSndTheChocolateFactory’’, she made jokes in interviews not not after about Depp being obsessed with her career.

to:

* Meta example: When Denise Nickerson, former child actress who played both Amy Jennings/Nora Collins in the original series, and Violet Beauregarde in ‘’Film/WillyWonkaAndTheChocolateFactory’’ noted Johnny Depp starring in both the ‘’Dark Shadows’’ movie and ‘’Film/CharlieSndTheChocolateFactory’’, ‘’Film/CharlieAndTheChocolateFactory’’, she made jokes in interviews not not after about Depp being obsessed with her career.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None

Added DiffLines:

* Meta example: When Denise Nickerson, former child actress who played both Amy Jennings/Nora Collins in the original series, and Violet Beauregarde in ‘’Film/WillyWonkaAndTheChocolateFactory’’ noted Johnny Depp starring in both the ‘’Dark Shadows’’ movie and ‘’Film/CharlieSndTheChocolateFactory’’, she made jokes in interviews not not after about Depp being obsessed with her career.

Changed: 2

Removed: 86

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* Barnabas reciting "The Joker" by the Steve Miller Band as if he were reading a poem.



** That priceless moment when Barnabas recites The Steve Miller Band's "The Joker" as ''poetry''! And then compares it favorably to ''Shakespeare''!
*** [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a5d9IrjGNcA Heck, just listen to it.]]

to:

** * That priceless moment when Barnabas recites The Steve Miller Band's "The Joker" as ''poetry''! And then compares it favorably to ''Shakespeare''!
*** ** [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a5d9IrjGNcA Heck, just listen to it.]]
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None

Added DiffLines:

* At the party the old woman is sitting right in front of a speaker just reading and not even being aware of the music coming from it.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


-->'''Barnabas''': What kind of sorcery is this? (''rips a power cord out'') Reveal yourself, tiny songstress!

to:

-->'''Barnabas''': What kind of sorcery is this? (''rips a power an input cord out'') Reveal yourself, tiny songstress!
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


** "I must admit, they have not aged a day."

to:

** "I "I-I-I must admit, they have not aged a day."
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None


* The first thing Barnabas sees after being released (and slaking his thirst)? [[McDonalds A large, golden symbol]] that quite resembles one he had found in a book about the Devil.

to:

* The first thing Barnabas sees after being released (and slaking his thirst)? [[McDonalds [[UsefulNotes/McDonalds A large, golden symbol]] that quite resembles one he had found in a book about the Devil.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None

Added DiffLines:

** Even before the bodice rip, Barnabas's...facial reactions to Angelique taking his hand to fondle her with. He seems quite...content with it.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


* During the climax when Elizabeth realizes her daughter [[spoiler:is a werewolf]], Carolyn gives her the most deadpan expression and says:

to:

* During the climax when Elizabeth realizes her daughter [[spoiler:is a werewolf]], Carolyn gives her the most deadpan expression ([[LeaningOnTheFourthWall at the camera]]) and says:
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None

Added DiffLines:

** That priceless moment when Barnabas recites The Steve Miller Band's "The Joker" as ''poetry''! And then compares it favorably to ''Shakespeare''!
*** [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a5d9IrjGNcA Heck, just listen to it.]]
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


-->'''Angelique:''' (''rips her suit off'') With ''[[IHaveBoobsYouMustObey this]]''!

to:

-->'''Angelique:''' (''rips her suit off'') [[IHaveBoobsYouMustObey With ''[[IHaveBoobsYouMustObey this]]''!THIS!]]
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None

Added DiffLines:

** "I must admit, they have not aged a day."
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None


** Later on, he's watching ''ScoobyDoo''.

to:

** Later on, he's watching ''ScoobyDoo''.''Franchise/ScoobyDoo''.

Added: 4

Changed: 116

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None


--> '''Hoffman:''' Do you know what doctor patient confidentiality is? (''Descends crotch-wise'')
* During the climax when Elizabeth realizes her daughter [[spoiler: is a werewolf]], Carolyn gives her the most deadpan expression and says:
--> '''Carolyn:''' Yes, I'm [[spoiler: a werewolf]]. Let's not make a big deal about it.

to:

--> '''Hoffman:''' Do you know what doctor patient doctor/patient confidentiality is? (''Descends (''descends crotch-wise'')
* During the climax when Elizabeth realizes her daughter [[spoiler: is [[spoiler:is a werewolf]], Carolyn gives her the most deadpan expression and says:
--> '''Carolyn:''' Yes, I'm [[spoiler: a werewolf]]. [[spoiler:a werewolf]], okay? Let's not make a big deal about it. it.



--> "Mephistopheles!"

to:

--> "Mephistopheles!"Mephistopheles!



-->'''Barnabas''': What kind of sorcery is this? Reveal yourself, tiny songstress!

to:

-->'''Barnabas''': What kind of sorcery is this? (''rips a power cord out'') Reveal yourself, tiny songstress!



--> '''Barnabas''': [[TakeThat This is a very silly play.]]

to:

--> '''Barnabas''': [[TakeThat This is a very silly play.]]play]].



--> '''Barnabas''': ''(watching Cooper perform)'' Ugliest woman I've ever seen.

to:

--> '''Barnabas''': ''(watching (''watching Cooper perform)'' perform'') Ugliest woman I've ever seen.



* Barnabas' scene with the hippies. [[AcceptableTargets Especially the end.]]

to:

* Barnabas' scene with the hippies. [[AcceptableTargets Especially the end.]]end]].



--> '''Barnabas:''' Locked in a box for 200 years!
--> '''Angelique:''' Don't exaggerate, it was only 196.

to:

--> '''Barnabas:''' Locked in a box for LOCKED IN A BOX! For 200 years!
--> '''Angelique:''' Don't exaggerate, it exaggerate. It was only 196.



-->'''Barnabas:''' ''*hearing footsteps*'' I hear you! Come! Do not fear!

to:

-->'''Barnabas:''' ''*hearing footsteps*'' (''hearing footsteps'') I hear you! Come! Do not fear!



-->'''David:''' It's been twenty minutes. ''(beat)'' Why do you have ladies' underwear on your face?

to:

-->'''David:''' It's been twenty minutes. ''(beat)'' (''beat'') Why do you have ladies' underwear on your face?



-->'''Angelique:''' (Rips her suit off) With ''[[IHaveBoobsYouMustObey this]]''!

to:

-->'''Angelique:''' (Rips (''rips her suit off) off'') With ''[[IHaveBoobsYouMustObey this]]''!



** Barnabas: ''*ducks*'' "Ha! You missed m-" ''*splat*''
*** The old cleaning woman even starts to wipe it off his face, but [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere gives up]] when she sees the bugs in the mess.

to:

** Barnabas: ''*ducks*'' "Ha! You missed m-" Missed me. ''*splat*''
*** The old cleaning woman even starts to wipe it off his face, but [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere gives up]] when she sees the bugs in the mess.mess.
----
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-->'''Angelique:''' (Rips her suit off) With ''[[IHaveBooksYouMustObey this]]''!

to:

-->'''Angelique:''' (Rips her suit off) With ''[[IHaveBooksYouMustObey ''[[IHaveBoobsYouMustObey this]]''!
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


-->'''Angelique:''' (Rips her suit off) With ''[[MyBreastsAreDownHere this]]''!

to:

-->'''Angelique:''' (Rips her suit off) With ''[[MyBreastsAreDownHere ''[[IHaveBooksYouMustObey this]]''!
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None

Added DiffLines:

* Until he gets a coffin to rest in, Barnabas has to make do with sleeping upside down on a bedpost, a refrigerator box, and a cabinet full of towels and blankets.
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* Angelique: "Command"? You make me sick! *projectile vomits*
** Barnabas: *ducks* "Ha! You missed m-" *splat*

to:

* Angelique: "Command"? You make me sick! *projectile vomits*
''*projectile vomits* ''
** Barnabas: *ducks* ''*ducks*'' "Ha! You missed m-" *splat*''*splat*''
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None


* The RunningGag of Barnabas thinking that AliceCooper is a woman.

to:

* The RunningGag of Barnabas thinking that AliceCooper Music/AliceCooper is a woman.
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*** The old cleaning woman even starts to wipe it off his face.

to:

*** The old cleaning woman even starts to wipe it off his face.face, but [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere gives up]] when she sees the bugs in the mess.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


** Barnabas: *ducks* "Ha! You missed m-" *splat*

to:

** Barnabas: *ducks* "Ha! You missed m-" *splat**splat*
*** The old cleaning woman even starts to wipe it off his face.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


--> '''Barnabas''': This is a very silly play.

to:

--> '''Barnabas''': [[TakeThat This is a very silly play.]]
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None


-->'''Barnabas''': Tell me your secrets, tiny songstress!

to:

-->'''Barnabas''': Tell me your secrets, What kind of sorcery is this? Reveal yourself, tiny songstress!
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


-->'''Barnabas:''' Oh thank goodness! What year is it? How many decades have past?

to:

-->'''Barnabas:''' Oh thank goodness! What year is it? How many decades have past?passed?

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