Funny / Cars

Cars
  • Guido's pit stop is without a doubt the Crowning Moment of Awesome for this film. The reaction of Chick Hicks' pit crew is priceless - they drop their mustache grilles. "Peet stop."
  • Lightning tries to use Doc's advice to "turn right to go left"—-only to thud into another cactus patch; and the impact also causes a tall saguaro to fall on him
    Lightning: Ow! Ow that—(saguaro falls on top of him) OWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!
  • Lightning muttering to himself about his failed use of Doc's advice.
    Lightning: "Turn right to go left"...Guess what? I tried it, and you know what? This crazy thing happened - I went right!
    Lizzie: You keep talkin' to yourself, people will think you're crazy.
    Lightning: (sarcastically) Thanks for the tip.
    Lizzie: What? I wasn't talking to you.
  • Harv buttering up Lightning:
    Harv: And it is such an honor to be your agent that it almost hurts me to take ten percent of your winnings. And merchandising. And ancillary rights in perpetuity-- anyway, what a race, huh, champ?
    • And later after Harv finds Lightning:
    Harv: "You can't buy this kind of publicity! I don't know what you need me for! That's just an expression, by the way, you signed a contract."
    • What really sells this moment is his change of tone, mid-sentence. At first it's loud and hammy, then it's all serious and quiet, with no warning.
  • "AND MY NAME IS NOT CHUCK!" Even better is that his character is listed in the credits as "Not Chuck".
    • Comes up again in the mini-biography collection you can unlock on the Blu-ray. Actually most of the biographies are pretty funny.
  • This exchange:
    Mater: I know this might be a bad time right now, but you owe me thirty two thousand dollars in legal fees.
    Lightning: What?
    Mater: *Nods*
  • When Doc introduces Lightning to Bessie and sentences him to community service:
    Lightning: Whoa, whoa, whoa, how long is this gonna take?
    Doc: Well, if a fella does it right, it should take him about five days.
    Lightning: Five days?! But I should be in California shmoozing Dinoco right now!
    Doc: Then if I were you, I'd quit yappin' and start workin'! Hook him up, Mater!
    Mater: Okey-dokey! [struggles with getting the clamp off Lightning's left front tire, but successfully removes the clamp, allowing Lightning to speed off into the distance]
    Lightning: FREEDOM!!!
    Mater (as Doc glares at him): Err...Maybe I should've, uh...hooked him up to Bessie... and THEN, uh...then took the boot off?
  • Doc completely Trolling Lightning when he gets stuck in the cactus patch.
    Hey! Was that floating like a Cadillac or was that stinging like a Beamer? I'm confused! You drive like ya fix roads! Lousy!
  • This exchange between Fillmore and Sarge:
    Fillmore: "I'm telling you, man, every third blink is slower."
    Sarge: "The '60s weren't good to you, were they?"
    • Made even funnier via Word of God stating that the animators did, in fact, make every third blink a little slower than the first two.
  • Chick pulling an Exact Words on himself:
    Chick: Hey, McQueen, that must be really embarrassing. But I wouldn't worry about it. Because I didn't do it!
  • Chick Hicks getting booed off the stage.
  • The utter contempt for the Fourth Wall displayed in the credits where Mack comments on John Ratzenberger's voice in Cars versions of several other Pixar films.
  • Various dialogues during credits scene which shows Toy Story, Monsters, Inc., and A Bug's Life are recycled AS CARS!.
  • The whole tractor-tipping scene with Lightning and Mater, up to and including the encounter with Frank. Mater demonstrates by sneaking up to one tractor. He then lightly starts his engine, startling the tractor, which rolls forward and pitches up on its back wheels. But when Lightning revs his engine at full blast, intending to tip just the tractor he's snuck up on, every single tractor in the field that isn't already down tips over. They both get a good laugh out of it — until they hear the sound of a bull bellowing.
    • Gets its Brick Joke when the tractors stampede the town.
  • Lightning's Freak Out when Van and Minny quickly flee Radiator Springs, while he's stuck to Bessie, flailing around:
    Lightning: Don't leave me here! I'm in Hillbilly Hell! My IQ is dropping by the second!! I'M BECOMING ONE OF THEEEEEEEEEMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!
    • Bonus point when you realize that he does become one of them by the end of the movie.
  • The very final scene after the credits, where Van and Minny are lost in the desert.
    (Van and Minnie are in the middle of the desert, dusty, still looking for California)
    Minnie: [exhausted] Oh for the love of Chrysler, Can we please ask someone for directions?
    Van: [delirious and hysterical] NO! There's another ramp close! I KNOW IT! I CAN FEEL IT! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!
  • Every morning, Sarge raises the flag while playing "Reveille" and Fillmore plays the Jimi Hendrix's rendition of "The Star-Spangled Banner" loudly next door:
    Sarge: WILL YOU TURN THAT DISRESPECTFUL JUNK OFF?!
    Fillmore: Respect the classics, man! It's Hendrix!
  • The tractor stampede, full stop:
    Mater: Hey, listen, listen! If anybody asks you, we was out smashing mailboxes, okay! (speeds away)
    Lightning: What? (sees tractors coming up the road)
  • A meta example for the animators brainstorming session.
  • Lightning going crazy fixing the road at night, after crashing at North Willys Butte:
    Lightning: [sarcastically] Radiator Springs! A HAPPY place! [Bessie squirts a blob of pavement on him] Oh! Okay, Bessie, you think that's funny?! Great! I'm talking to Bessie now! I'M TALKING TO BESSIE!!
Cars comic books


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