Madame Malfoy, or a Forced Marriage
(Russian: Мадам Малфой, или Брак по принуждению) is a Harry Potter / Don Quixote Crossover Crack Fic by Samus2001.
Many years after the events of the canon, Pansy Parkinson's steady life as Draco's mistress is turned upside down when widower Lucius Malfoy, whom she believed to have died or moved away, turns up alive as an escaped Madman in the Attic. Lucius is certain that he is a valiant knight… and that Pansy is both his squire and his bride.
Tropes featured in the fanfic:
- Affectionate Nickname: Lucius calls Pansy "my loyal Sancho Pansy".
- Archnemesis Dad: In his madness, Lucius proclaims Draco his mortal enemy. Considering Draco refused to get him treated until matters came to a crisis, there's certainly no love lost there in reality either.
- Courtly Love: In Lucius's vision of the world, he is loyal to Pansy but his heart belongs to Rosmerta, and he wants everyone he meets to declare Rosmerta the fairest of all.
- Fantastically Indifferent: Lucius and Hagrid's duel progresses as Lucius throws Killing Curses and Hagrid deflects them with his umbrella, while in the meantime, Pansy, watching it, is so bored she yawns a few times.
- Fourth-Date Marriage: Lucius barely knows Pansy, and she hasn't seen him since the Battle of Hogwarts, but thanks to his deteriorated mental state, he declares her his bride.
- Gold Digger: Pansy is only involved with Draco for his money. Then she realizes she can secure a much better deal if she stays married to Lucius.
- Hoist by His Own Petard: Draco forces Pansy (on pain of mutilation) to play along with Lucius's insane ideas. Cue Pansy marrying Lucius and taking away most of the Malfoys' earthly possessions.
- I'm a Doctor, Not a Placeholder: At one point, Pansy grumbles that she is Lucius's wife, not a squire.
- Karmic Butt-Monkey: Draco ends up robbed of all his money and valuables, but it's hard to feel sorry about it considering he cheated on Astoria with Pansy, didn't get his father treated, and forced Pansy to distract Lucius.
- Wicked Stepmother: Pansy doesn't really care for Draco, so when she marries Lucius, she feels no qualms about robbing the entire Malfoy family of their possessions and taunting Draco about it.
