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Male Students
B053: Clayton Barber
B053: Clayton “Clay” Barber
Designated Weapon: Street Sword: Practical Use of the Long Blade by Phil Elmore
Conclusion: Oh my god! Last time, the mute girl gets the megaphone, and now this? This is too good. Now we just need a deaf kid so we can give them a record player... hang on, does this make me a bad person? - Josh Baines
B054: Drew Woods
B054: Drew Woods
Designated Weapon: Tekagi-shuko gloves
Conclusion: A weak will is a drawback that's difficult to overcome even with the right tools, and B054 does not have the right tools. The best he can hope for is that he can live off the land and lay low, but he'll have to face another competitor at some point, and that'll probably be his end. - Christina Stockton
- Hopeless Suitor: Towards his crush, Declyn.
- The Heart: A ball of sunshine, making him one for the gardening club, alongside his friend and crush Declyn.
B055: Nick Ogilvie
B055: Nicholas "Nick" Domhnall Parkhurst Ogilvie
Designated Weapon: Jagdkommando Tri-Dagger
Conclusion: Hey, my favorite stupid knife. I don't see B055 becoming my favorite stupid boy, but I'm open to surprises. For your next trick, try being halfway competent, and maybe I'll get over the fact that magic tricks are for kids and dumbasses. - Veronica Rai
B056: Jonah Heartgrave
B056: Jonah Heartgrave
Designated Weapon: Desert Eagle handgun
Conclusion: I like to call guys like this the Meatshield Special. He's going down in defense of some loser, and then said loser is going to have a gun that will probably break their wrist. That's what we call karma. - Shamino Warhen
B057: Kyle Harrison
B057: Kyle Harrison
Designated Weapon: Potato launcher + 1 lb. sack of potatoes
Conclusion: This school seems to be evenly divided into sociopaths and bleeding hearts. Unfortunately this boy falls into the latter category, so the weekend Lourvey spent building that weapon is most likely going to have been a waste. - Trent Camden
B059: Nathan Coleman
B059: Nathan Coleman
Designated Weapon: MTs225 Shotgun
Conclusion: Ooh. Ooooooh. Ooooh no. Oh. Oof. Shit. - Josh Baines
- The Load: Due to his Down's syndrome, Nathan is unable to properly grasp the situation and is a liability to his party.
- Morality Pet: For Madison Springer. Deconstructed in that their relationship is not at all healthy because of it.
B060: Thomas "Tom" Swift
B060: Thomas “Tom” Swift
Designated Weapon: Tactical kama
Conclusion: You're already in a downward spiral. The easy way out's right there. Don't waste our time. - Veronica Rai
B061: Oliver Lacroix
B061: Oliver Lacroix
Designated Weapon: Butterfly knife
Conclusion: Between all your vices, I can see you like to live life in the moment, B061. That's good, because with your decison-making skills, you don't have much of that life left to live. - Jim Greynolds
B062: Jeff Greene
B062: Jeffrey Albert Greene
Designated Weapon: Riot shield
Conclusion: There's no better attitude adjustment than staring certain death in the face. B062 will need to figure that out, or make good use of that shield; the lone wolf playstyle doesn't work if everyone you might come across already sees you as a potential explosion. - Christina Stockton
B063: Guillermo "Billy" Trevino
B063: Guillermo "Billy" Trevino
Designated Weapon: Pepper Spray
Conclusion: Another day, another loser whose last words are going to be "Hey, watch this!" - Veronica Rai
B064: Justin Greene
B064: Justin Greene
Designated Weapon: J.R. Rizzolo's tire iron
Conclusion: Your weapon is more interesting than you are. Next contestant! - Josie Knight
B065: Manuel Figueroa
B065: Manuel Figueroa
Designated Weapon: Shuriken x 5
Conclusion: I've been wracking my brain for over a half hour trying to think of a joke involving Mexicans, baseball, dancing and ninjas. I got nothing. This kid came out of the bargain bin wearing whatever stuck to him, so... I guess we'll just have to see how he does? I'll put him down as my wild card. - Josh Baines
B066: Blaise d'Aramitz
B066: Blaise d'Aramitz
Designated Weapon: Bottle of old Jack Daniel's whiskey
Conclusion: You're going to end up just like Bowie. Dead. - Josie Knight
- Ambiguous Gender Identity: Blaise is genderfluid.
B067: Ramsey Cortez
B067: Ramsey Cortez
Designated Weapon: 40 lb. bag of Lucky Charms marshmallows
Conclusion: Follow the rainbow, B067. It's the only chance you've got at stumbling into success. - Shamino Warhen
B068: Alexander Brooke
B068: Alexander Brooke
Designated Weapon: Grand Power K100
Conclusion: Thanks for the dog, fucko. - Veronica Rai
B069: Ron Kiser
B069: Ronald "Ron" Kiser
Designated Weapon: Fire extinguisher
Conclusion: SIXTY NINE, DUDES! ... Doesn't feel as good as I thought, but still got it out of my system. Ahem, B069 is quick, lasts a long time, and is best in pairs where he can properly reciprocate duties. He just needs to be concerned about the enjoyment of others and not just himself, lest somebody sink their teeth into him. - Dennis Lourvey
B070: Dane Lennox
B070: Dane Lennox
Designated Weapon: Uzi-Pro
Conclusion: Rich kid with a silver spoon born in his mouth? Yeah, I can see why that would be easy to hate. Now, let's see them try to hate on somebody with a spoon in their mouth and an Uzi in their hands. - Trent Camden
B071: Sal Bonaventura
B071: Salvatore “Sal” Bonaventura
Designated Weapon: Non-functional collar (old model, no explosives or electronics)
Conclusion: Oh, what you've got there is one of the old models I worked on. Think that one was 'D4-K' something. Had a weird designation, but I liked calling it the 'Black Waltz 4'. It won't blow up or anything and it's nothing like the latest models, but in the right hands I think it can be put to some good use. Come on, B071... let's get creative. - Dennis Lourvey
B072: William Dover
B072: William "Bill" Dover
Designated Weapon: Caffeine Pills
Conclusion: I'm always relieved when we don't waste a good weapon on these dopey Jesus types. Makes me feel like somebody up there is looking out for things... oh wait. - Matt Richards
B073: Jeremiah Anderson
B073: Jeremiah Anderson
Designated Weapon: Claw hammer
Conclusion: You have two choices, B073: take the opportunity we've given you to forge the new path you've so desperately been seeking, or die as miserably as you lived. - Tracen Danya
B074: Theo Walterson
B074: Theophilus “Theo” Walterson
Designated Weapon: Color Guard rifle
Conclusion: Gardeners have an interesting track record, so I'd say try snapping quickly and keeping things interesting, but man. I just can't get behind a guy named Theophilus as any sort of credible threat. Also the unconvincing fake gun, but man. - Josh Baines
- The Smart Guy: In the gardening club. This is best shown in the aftermath of Drew's death, where he is able to compose himself and ask some sensible questions while the other surviving club members freak out.
B075: Arjen Kramer
B075: Arjen Justus Kramer
Designated Weapon: Flammenschwert
Conclusion: That is a very nice sword. If you spin it around and scream loud enough, people might think you're scary and not stick around long enough to realize you've got no way of using it properly. - Matt Richards
B076: Abraham “Abe” Watanabe
B077: Abraham “Abe” Watanabe
Designated Weapon: Replica Freddy Krueger glove
Conclusion: A kid with a reference weapon that Lourvey isn't fighting everyone to get? Sucks to suck, I guess. I've seen the movies though, so don't worry: bad jokes are exactly the way to go. - Veronica Rai
B078: Thomas Buckley
B078: Thomas Buckley
Designated Weapon: Vektor SP1
Conclusion: You don't want pity? Good news then coward. There's no pity for you here. You get to put that gun to use and go solve some problems before someone solves you. - Josie Knight
B079: Colin McCabe
B079: Colin McCabe
Designated Weapon: 1000-piece puzzle (missing 2 pieces)
Conclusion: Hey guys, I found the last two pieces under the- aw, man... - Donald, our intern
Female Students
G052: Joanne Coleman
G052: Joanne Sekai Coleman
Designated Weapon: George Hunter High School mascot costume
Conclusion: Welp, doesn't get any more gender-neutral than THAT, does it? Go Horned Owls! - Matt Richards
G053: Katelynne Kirkpatrick
G053: Katelynne Kirkpatrick
Designated Weapon: Cochise High School 2015 yearbook
Conclusion: It's like that one weird horse girl from high school did the fusion dance with Sid from Toy Story, and they've merged for the sole purpose of crafting custom-tailored nightmares. Would you kindly send us the contact info of other members of your 'community' so we can put them on the island also? - Dennis Lourvey
G054: Valerija Bogdanovic
G054: Valerija Bogdanovic
Designated Weapon: Pickelhaube helmet
Conclusion: Screw diplomacy, G054. You've got killing in the blood... heck, you even got a tragic backstory to really get that rage going. Use your head (no, literally, ram it right into somebody's gut) and you're a contender. Or drop dead, see if I care. Cyka blat! - Dennis Lourvey
G055: Tirzah Foss
G055: Tirzah Foss
Designated Weapon: Wildey .45 (handgun)
Conclusion: You don't need to worry about opening up. With a draw like that, other people will have no problems opening up to you. - Abby Soto
G056: Dhairyalakshmi "Daria" Bhatia
G056: Dhairyalakshmi “Daria” Bhatia
Designated Weapon: Pack of instant hand warmers
'Conclusion:]] I don't see this show going for a very long run. Put your acting chops to some good use and play the role of somebody who at least makes it to act 2. - Jim Greynolds''
G057: Catherine Zier
G057: Catherine Lina Zier
Designated Weapon: Large plastic bag containing 1 live lobster in water
Conclusion: Mr. Pinchy? Where did you go? Pinchy- PINCHY NOOOOOO! - Donald, our intern
G058: Yuko Hayashibara
G058: Yuko Hayashibara
Designated Weapon: Nock gun
Conclusion: Athletic? Tough, prideful, aggressive? Holy shit I was right, you ARE Buttercup! Ahem, given your role as the muscle of the Powerpuff Girls (which is totally what we're calling you all now), I see no reason why you can't team up and make it far. Provided you can all get together, that is... if evil finds you when you're alone, your formulaic episode will grind to an abrupt, and deadly, end. - Dennis Lourvey
G060: Princess McQuillan
G060: Princess McQuillan Dasinger
Designated Weapon: Vial of Samandarin + vial of antidote
Conclusion: Adapt and overcome, G060. You're versatile and with a good skill set. Manipulate your way into a strong social circle of 'friends' willing to take a bullet for you, obtain a weapon of your own, and you might just stand atop the mountain. Doesn't that sound promising? - Tracen Danya
G061: Charelle Chernyshyova
G061: Charelle Faith Chernyshyova
Designated Weapon: Brass knuckles
Conclusion: If you get lucky you'll be able to live long enough to become a meme or you'll just die in a fucking hilarious way. I don't care. - Josie Knight
G062: Tonya Collins
G062: Tonya Eudora Collins
Designated Weapon: Machete
Conclusion: There's no extra credit for being a mother, G062. But you do have something to live for that nobody else here does. If your child really matters to you, now is the time to show it. - Abby Soto
G063: Christina "Renz" Rennes
G063: Christina Siobhan “Renz” Rennes
Designated Weapon: Parachute knife
Conclusion: Laugh all you want, but 'won't trust murderers' and 'understands how to play the game' are advantages many of you are sorely lacking. If I didn't know better, I'd say G063 was practically studying up to win this whole thing. Gamers do it greatest! - Dennis Lourvey
- Polar Opposite Twins: Christina is savvy and mistrustful, but unsociable, whereas her identical twin sister Jessica is popular but naive.
G064: Anna "Roxanne" Herbert
G064: Anna “Roxanne” Christine Herbert
Designated Weapon: Benelli M3
Conclusion: There's just one rule here, and you've got the tools to follow it. So, who do you want to be when you're out from under your parents' thumbs? Figure it out, and don't forget to put on a show. - Jim Greynolds
G065: Kelly Nguyen
G065: Kelly Thuy Nguyen
Designated Weapon: Rubber Chicken
Conclusion: Is there some rule I wasn't told about that says all Vietnamese girls in the game have to have a name starting with K? Whatever. I don't see this busybody upholding any legacies. - Veronica Rai
G066: Marco/Nona Hart
G066: Nona Hart
Designated Weapon: FN P90
Conclusion: As my father once told me, you can't do a thing about where you are — only where you're going. You grow and adapt in order to survive, or you fail to find that drive to succeed, and die like many of your classmates. Which path you go down is determined solely by whether or not you can re-discover your survival instincts, G066. - Tracen Danya
- Trans Tribulations: Before the island, Marco was a closeted trans man. After killing Kayla Harris, he decides that he can't continue suppressing this part of himself, and comes out as male. A big facet of his story is trying to come to terms with finally being himself while he likely only has a few days left to live.
G067: Kayla Harris
G067: Kayla Harris
Designated Weapon: Steel folding chair
Conclusion: I can expect lots of - whose music is that? BAH GAWD, IT'S G067! SHE'S COMING DOWN THE RAMP AND SHE'S GOT A STEEL CHAIR! LORD HAVE MERCY, SHE'S BREAKING THE COMPETITION IN HALF! STOP THE DAMN MATCH, SHE'S BEATING THEM LIKE A GOVERNMENT MULE! - Dennis Lourvey
G068: Adele Jones
G068: Adele Jones
Designated Weapon: Small shopping cart
Conclusion: What kind of- did our budget run out? Where did we get that? - Veronica Rai
G069: Shauna Cooke
G069: Shauna Cooke
Designated Weapon: Pata
Conclusion: If you already crumple like wet tissue paper in the face of day-to-day adversity there's not much more to say here. G069 may ride in the wake of stronger contestants for a while, but she's more likely to be an early out. - Christina Stockton
G070: Jessica Rennes
G070: Jessica Marie Rennes
Designated Weapon: Bear Trap
Conclusion: We've got a grand tradition here of siblings turning on each other when the chips are down, and I think Little Miss Sunshine is about to become the next in that long line of casualties. - Veronica Rai
- Lipstick Lesbian: Is conventionally feminine and is dating Stephanie McDonald.
- Polar Opposite Twins: Jessica is popular but naive, whereas her identical twin sister Christina is savvy and mistrustful, but unsociable.
G071: Sakurako Jackson
G071: Sakurako Adina Jackson
Designated Weapon: Prop knife set (plastic knife w/ collapsible blade + 2 fake blood capsules)
Conclusion: Play to your strengths, and you have a straight shot to at least the midpoint of the game, G071. Get bogged down by your weakness, and you're little more than an excessively cheerful moving target. Don't get eliminated. - Christina Stockton
G072: Quinn Abert
G072: Quinn Abert
Designated Weapon: Bullwhip
Conclusion: Look, I could make references to the song all day (and it's stuck in my head, thanks a lot), but it's a lot more constructive to focus on your fiery temperament. Psyche yourself up enough and you're bound to LP LP forward LK HP somebody's block off before they even know what's happening. - Dennis Lourvey
- Armor-Piercing Response: When Daria Bhatia rejects the premise of the game, telling Quinn that she's trapped in the terrorists' system, Quinn's answer renders Daria momentarily speechless.Quinn: You people. You— [she looked up, and her face twisted.] Things. You never mattered. Not to me.
- Ax-Crazy: Averted. Even though Quinn racks up a very rapid body count, for no real reason other than that she can, she is in full control of herself the entire time.
- Dead Person On Display: Quinn puts two of her victims (Stepney and Richard) on display in brutal fashion, referring to it as "making a scarecrow".
- Doesn't Like Guns: She finds guns to be boring and unsatisfying, and is actively annoyed about the difficulty of effectively wielding her rifle.
- Homage: To the horror genre and slasher villains in general, but most specifically Halloween (1978) and Michael Myers, including appearing in the very background of a scene with the post linking out to one of Halloween's stinger sound effects ("Michael kills Judith").
- Improvised Weapon: Quinn makes extensive use of wooden shivs crafted by breaking up and sharpening tree branches, utilising them in the majority of her kills.
- Sinister Shiv: In a huge way.
- Reminiscing About Your Victims: Invoked by Juliette Sargent, who asks Quinn about her favourite kill.Quinn: Stepney. I made a scarecrow. Always wanted to make a scarecrow.
- Shout-Out: Quinn's background is an extensive Shout-Out to Worm, sharing the element of a mother named Annette being killed in a car crash (leaving her father Danny a widower) with Taylor Hebert of the aforementioned, among other references. She even claims to be called Taylor when tricking Stepney Cruz.
- The Dreaded: Attracts a naturally frightening reputation due to killing so frequently, so early (and the manner of some of those kills), but also has several characters specifically terrified of her, including Katelynne Kirkpatrick and Garren Mortimer. This is no better displayed than when her presence alone causes Meilin Zhou, Ace Ortega, and Angie Cortez to panic and flee.
- The Sociopath: A textbook example: Quinn has zero conscience. The closest she comes to regret is her anger at teammate Rhonda Lawson "making" her kill her, and then only because she believes it will draw other teammates' attention. As the quote above illustrates, Quinn doesn't even really view anyone else as a real person.
- Reconstruction: Of psychopaths in Survival of the Fittest in general. Psychopathy had previously been used largely as an easy label for characters to slaughter their classmates without remorse and with little explanation given, something arguably going all the way back to Battle Royale's Kazuo Kiriyama. With Quinn, a lot goes into examining how a literal clinical psychopath would tick and the fact she is simply not wired correctly in the head.
G073: Terra Johnson
G073: Terra Johnson
Designated Weapon: Gas Mask
Conclusion: Hey, don't worry about it, G073. Your video game namesake was ALSO brainwashed by an uncaring god. Don't worry too much about being selfish, by the way... it's the only chance I see of you approaching anything resembling victory. - Dennis Lourvey
G074: Megan Summers
G074: Megan Summers
Designated Weapon: ArtCreativity Juggling Balls Set for Beginners (Set of 3)
Conclusion: Much like your weapon, I only see you getting tossed around for a little bit before being unceremoniously dumped into a garbage can. - Trent Camden
G075: Aditi Sharma
G072: Aditi Abhijit Sharma
Designated Weapon: Browning Hi Power 9mm
Conclusion: No taste for blood and no love for any pride but your own. You are a wounded lioness, child, and the scavengers are unkind. Bad luck. - Adimabua Lawal
G076: Garnet Barnes
G076: Garnet Barnes
Designated Weapon: String of Mardi Gras beads
Conclusion: Life on the island can be a lonely one for the ill-prepared, G076. What to do about that, that's the only thing I can't teach you. We all need to figure out the answer for ourselves. So how are you going to survive? Are you going to sing your song? Our song? - Dennis Lourvey
- Morality Pet: Acts as one to Erika Stieglitz: during their stretch in the midgame spent together, Erika doesn't kill a single person. Once they separate, Erika goes right back to killing.
- Signature Headgear: Her Arcanine-patterned hat. She loses it relatively early in the game only to rediscover it (battered and weather-damaged) much later on, donning it once again.
- Sole Survivor: Winner of Survival of the Fittest Version 7.
G077: Christine “Chris” Bright
G077: Christine “Chris” Bright
Designated Weapon: Big Mouth Billy Bass (15th Anniversary Edition)
Conclusion: Keep this between us, G077, but that was actually supposed to go out last version for the anniversary. Stupid postal service ran late, so now you have a whole new friend to motivate you! Just think about how lucky you are. - Matt Richards
- Posthumous Character: Chris dies very early, but gets a pretty decent amount of coverage via flashbacks and reminscence from Erika Stieglitz and Garnet Barnes, who used to play dungeons and dragons with her.
