Characters / Glorb

The Krusty Krab Krew

Spongeopp

Fun, fun stands for "Fuck you and pay me"
Fun, funny how you never gonna play me
Fun, I have had enough, now hold up
Read that backwards, that shit fun, ha, yeah, I'm goin' crazy

One of Mr. Swags' two top enforcers. Fond of blowing bubbles, drinking lean, and allegedly sleeping with Plankton's wife.

• Adaptational Villainy: Like most characters in the Glorb universe, but Spongebob stands out especially, going from a cheerful fry cook to a ruthless gangster who has no problems murdering his enemies for fun.
• Big Damn Heroes: He rides in on an Alaskan Bull Worm in the opening of "The Bottom 2", right when it looked like Karen and Dankton were going to finish off the Krusty Krew.
• Giggling Villain: Does this frequently.
• Image Song: His solo, "FUN".
• O.O.C. Is Serious Business: "Can Gangsters Cry?" is a far cry from the sponge who claimed to only do "real shit", singing a country song about wanting to repair things with Sandy.
• Psychopathic Manchild: The most hedonistic and wanton of the Krusty Krew. Karen mocks this in her revenge solo, deriding his fondness for karate as immature.
• Your Mom: A large part of "FUN" is about having sex with Karen and shooting Dankton to rub salt in the wound.

Squidwock

Yeah, these bitches gettin' moister, them bullets hittin' critical
We split him like an oyster, and left him lookin' clinical
Now Squiddy got a pointer, and he'll tell you what he finna do
Is catch an opp, pussy, stretch him out like a syllable
One of Mr. Swags' two top enforcers. Has a noted fondness for guns and an especially brutal style.

• Heterosexual Life-Partners: He and SpongeOpp are Those Two Guys who play it cool, until one of them is hurt. Of course, if Karen is to be believed, it may not be so hetero...
• Image Song: His solo, "Trendsetter".
• Knight of Cerebus: He frequently spills the hardest bars in the group songs, and his demeanor when doing so is much steelier and cold than Swags or SpongeOpp.
• Villainous Friendship: He gets along much better with SpongeOpp than canon Squidward ever did with Spongebob.
• Your Mom: Often claims to have had sex with Plankton's wife as a dig.

Mr. Swags

Red bottom, sippin' purple lean
Bitch I'm gon' ride for my fuckin' team
Plankton whack, he a fucking fiend
Yeah, I run the game, what's my name? Eu-Eu-Eu-Eugene

Owner of the Krusty Krab and explicit leader of the Krusty Krew.

• The Leader: Explicitly the leader of the Krusty Krew gang and Plankton's archnemesis.
• Punctuated! For! Emphasis!: His verse in "The Bottom 2" as he loads up a rocket launcher:
  You. Are. FUCKED!

The Notorious P.A.T.

Let's see if she choked on dick
VVS on both my wrist
I was in the Chum Bucket
Now I'm outin' on my city

SpongeOpps best friend. While not parcipitating in the gang war or seeming to have ties towards the Krew, Dankton drafts him into the war by brainwashing him into a feature for one of his disses. Ever since his freeing, he's joined in the fun.

• Brainwashed and Crazy: Gets involuntarily recruited as a feature for "KFC" this way.
• Dumb Muscle: Doesn't have much of a role in the gang war, but is important enough to SpongeOpp for Plankton to target him.

Sandy Thee Squirrel

I'm geeked up like I'm DDG
I hit your block on every corner like a fuckin' DVD
They said the girly couldn't rap, hit the kitchen, leave 'em be
I hit 'em up like Crips and Bloods, the way I'm tryna see 'em bleed

The Krews lovely lady. She joined the rap game to prove that women are just as capable on the mic as men are.

• Friendly Sniper: She plays the part in "The Bottom 2", defending SpongeOpp with a sniper rifle when one of Dankton's goons tries to attack him.
• Image Song: Her solo, "MHMM".
• The Smurfette Principle: The solo female rapper aligned with the Krusty Krew.
• Stay in the Kitchen: Rejects this mindset among the rap game.

Secret Member

Gary the Snail

SpongeOpps pet snail. While unimportant to the Krew, he's a key figure in "The Bottom 2".

• Lethal Joke Character: Plankton's wrath is unfolding in "Vengeance" and the Krusty Krew can't fend him off. What do they do? Bring Gary in on "The Bottom 2" and give him a major Make My Monster Grow to take on the building-sized Karen mech.

The Chum Bucket

Dankton

That boy gonna leak, that boy gonna die
Know that I'm him, 'cause there's only one I
Bitch, I'm rollin' in the deep, set 'em on fire
Bitch, I'm stayin' with Adele, now she back online

Former owner of the Chum Bucket, now owner of the Clams Casino following its destruction. Mr. Swags arch-enemy.

• Badass in a Nice Suit: Prefers this look.
• Even Evil Has Loved Ones: Has hit up both Pearl (allegedly with Karen's blessing) and Mrs. Puff, yet he doesn't love Karen less and is devastated when she is target in a hit-and-run, not to mention ecstatic when he manages to bring her back.
• I Work Alone: Doesn't ask for help unless he needs it or to make a point. As he puts it in "KFC", "It is a 1-v-3 and I'm still soloing!"
• Sitcom Arch-Nemesis: Plays this role to the Krusty Krew...in a particularly violent kind of sitcom.

Karen

Back with a vengeance, the Mac got extended
More than an OS, I am snappin', Avengers
Back from the dead, bitch I came out the trenches
Opps gettin' red, leave 'em dead, like Redemption

• Climax Boss: Serves as the Final Boss of the first phase of the gang war, being more threatening than Dankton or the brainwashed P.A.T. and requiring teamwork from the entire Krusty Krew, including Sandy and even Gary to defeat.
• The Dog Bites Back: Tends to be the designated Your Mom for the Krusty Krew. SpongeOpp not only allegedly carried out a hit on her for Mr. Swags, but made a whole song with Squidwock, "Killcam" about how fun it was to violate and then kill her. Suffice to say, he should've double-tapped, and her clapback is vicious.
• Even Evil Has Loved Ones: She has Dankton's back and lets him feature on her solo "Vengeance".
• Humongous Mecha: Dankton doesn't just repair her, he plugs her into a giant mech with which to destroy the Krusty Krew!
• More Deadly Than the Male: Her resurrection in "Vengeance" solidifies her as undoubtedly the coldest and deadliest rapper of the whole lot. Her bars are every bit as devastating as Dankton's and twice as personal.
  Back with a vengeance, the Mac got extended,
  More than an OS^*A play intended to resemble the name "Thanos", the main villain of Avengers: Infinity War and Avengers: Endgame I am snappin' Avengers^*Karen in the video is armed with an Avenger minigun on her right arm and "snapping" is a euphemism for killing someone.
  Back from the dead, bitch I came out the trenches^*"The trenches" is internet slang for a really difficult ordeal, and is also an oceanography reference towards deep-sea trenches.
  Opps gettin' red, leave 'em dead, like redemption!^*An obvious reference towards the game Red Dead Redemption.
  MS Paint paint the block red!^*MS Paint is a pixel-based paint function, used to literally paint individual blocks of pixels, and "painting the block red" is a euphemism for enacting a slaughter. (x4)

  Solid State Drive-By on ya whole krew,^*A solid-state drive, or an SSD card, which stores memory in computers, combined with "drive-by" as in a drive-by shooting.''
  Why-Five guys gettin' bagged at the drive-thru?^*A quintuple-entrendre: "Why-Five guys" double-references 'wifi' which computers run, as well as the Five Guys Burgers 'n Fries restaurant chain, similar to the Krusty Krab. "Gettin' bagged" double-references both bagging food for drive-through customers at restaurants and "bagged" is a slang term for killing an animal and collecting it as a trophy. And, in her next set of verses, Karen goes on to diss five people: Sandy, Mr. Swags, Pearl, Spongeopp, and Squidwock.
• Not Quite Dead: At the end of "Killcam" and the beginning of "Vengeance".
• Plot-Triggering Death: Things already got tense during Danktons diss string, but the Krew hitting up the Chum Bucket and killing her is what kicks the war into high gear.
• Roaring Rampage of Revenge: The focus of her image song, "Vengeance", is how she's going to pay back everything done to her tenfold.

Unaffiliated

A$AP Larry

I've been me forever, I've been me forever, yeah
Don't mix business with my pleasure, they don't love me, I don't care
They say, “Larry, you a lobster, how the fuck you get so swell?”
Then they say, “Larry actin' shellfish 'cause he focus on himself”

A Goo Lagoon resident known for his large build. Isn't apart of either sides or aware of the gang war, atleast for now.

• "I Am Great!" Song: Since he isn't a part of the gang war between the Krusty Krew and the Chum Bucket, "Dumb Bell" is just about how jacked he is.

The Puff

So fuck these pussies, I'ma ride, this ain't no drivin’ school
I shot his feet and had him dancing like my diamonds do
Talking double D's, my chest on overload
Told him grab the keys, I'ma show him how I motorboat

SpongeOpps driving school teacher, Mr. Swags ex, and Danktons right-hand at Clams Casino.

• All Women Are Lustful: Her feature on Dankton's song has her claim to have lost interest in Mr. Swags due to him not being good in bed.
• Big Beautiful Woman: Implied to have been this in the show proper, but in this version it's more...well, think more "big beautiful lift".