Hello, Snickerdoodle Hamster back again! Today, I am going to liveblog something that isn't a Crossover! I will do Something Completely Different then what I normally do. I will be liveblogging The Mockbuster known as Life's a Jungle: Africa's Most Wanted.
For those of you who don't know, Life's a Jungle: Africa's Most Wanted is an unwatchable ripoff of Madagascar, released to cash in on the third film, Madagascar 3: Europe's Most Wanted (hence the suspiciously similar titles). There are no likeable characters, the film constantly relies on Filler, Padding, Plot Detours, an Ending Fatigue, animation that looks like it was done by high school animation students, overdosed potty humor, Limited Sound Effects, and no redeeming factors whatsoever. The film has gained almost universally negative reviews, and even easily amused children have despised it.
To spilt up the torture, since the film is exactly one hour and forty minutes long, I will be splitting this into ten parts, each covering exactly ten minutes, or one tenth, of this one hundred minute turd. So now... it begins!
Part One out of Ten. Also, no YouTube link for you, so you will have to search for this film online elsewhere!
We start the film with the Vanity Plate for Prevalent Entertainment. We get to the Artistic Title right afterward (that is, if you call cheap, mediocre CGI "artistic"), where we pan through the jungle to explore the poorly animated world of this movie. I will be skipping this part, because it wastes two and a half minutes of the film's running time.
We pan into our main character, Pip, who looks very bored. He attempts to swat a fly, but only in the most unnatural and strange way possible. We haven't even gotten to the first line of dialogue yet and this film is already unwatchable. Pip's owner is already acting very bratty, forcing Pip to go back into the jungle with him. The voice actors here are already Chewing the Scenery. Pip goes through the jungle on a truck, with as much Padding as they can possibly fit, again for two minutes.
We cut to Pip at a Vista Point, with this strange background music playing. Cut to some Stock Footage from the opening sequence. Another minute of Padding later, Pip bounces out of the truck because of a rhino and is left in the jungle on his own. Cue a completely unnecessary Happy Flashback to show how spoiled Pip is, complete with Spring from The Four Seasons. Total time wasted: THREE MINUTES AND FOURTY-FIVE SECONDS. Suddenly, Pip gets interrupted by a black panther who speaks in a baby's stock sound effects. That wraps up the first 10 minutes of this film.
How much more Padding can fit into a single film? Find out next time!
Time wasted total: About nine minutes and fifteen seconds of the film.
Percent of wasted time: 92.5%
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