History Quotes / Metaphorgotten

13th Feb '17 11:52:36 AM somerandomdude
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->''The Irish fear nothing and no one''\\
''They keep fightin' till everyone's dead!''\\
''...I'm not sure where this metaphor's goin'''\\
''I just felt like it had to be said!''
--> -- '''Paulette''', "Ireland," ''Theatre/LegallyBlonde''
24th Jan '17 4:55:15 PM Tacitus
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->'''Lutark''': Do you know how painful it is to watch you guys not to be with eachother?\\
'''Lutark''': It's like eating macaroni without the cheese.\\
'''Lutark''': So you end up with some sad bowl of mac and nothing and you're there wishing\\
'''Lutark''': 'Damn, this mac looks so sad, it needs some cheese'.\\
'''Rodard''': Pardon, am I the pasta in this metaphor or am I the cheese?\\
'''Lutark''': Well, I dunno, dude, you're both looking like p sad noodles either way.\\
'''Rodard''': Oh.
-->-- ''Webcomic/{{Hackbent}}''



->'''Lutark''': Do you know how painful it is to watch you guys not to be with eachother?
->'''Lutark''': It's like eating macaroni without the cheese.
->'''Lutark''': So you end up with some sad bowl of mac and nothing and you're there wishing
->'''Lutark''': 'Damn, this mac looks so sad, it needs some cheese'.
->'''Rodard''': Pardon, am I the pasta in this metaphor or am I the cheese?
->'''Lutark''': Well, I dunno, dude, you're both looking like p sad noodles either way.
->'''Rodard''': Oh.
->-- ''Webcomic/{{Hackbent}}''



->I always thought swimming was [[JustLikeMakingLove kinda like doing somebody.]] You dive in, flop around a bit, and you either get booed or somebody gives you a medal. And then I found out swimming isn't like that at all. You can't [[CargoShip have sex with]] [[NoodleIncident your neighbor's above-ground backyard pool]]... What was I talking about?
-->-- '''Haru''', ''WebAnimation/FiftyPercentOff''



->We are the Dark Knights for justice. Because as children we were nursed on the milk of justice, and as we grew up we acquired a taste for justice. Now as we get older we once again desire the taste of justice... but we cannot find the milk! So we go to Starbucks! And we get a coffee! But it's not the same thing! IT SUCKS! WHY DID I ORDER THIS!? IT'S TERRIBLE! And now you all understand what our mission is. And. What. We. Must. Do.

to:

->We are the Dark Knights for justice. Because as children we were nursed on the milk of justice, and as we grew up we acquired a taste for justice. Now as we get older we once again desire the taste of justice... but we cannot find the milk! So we go to Starbucks! And we get a coffee! But it's not the same thing! IT SUCKS! WHY DID I ORDER THIS!? IT'S TERRIBLE! And now you all understand what our mission is. And. What.And what. We. Must. Do.



->From the ashes sprouted a powerful friendship, and in time, Kirito found that he could [[DamnedByFaintPraise almost tolerate]] [[RagTagBunchOfMisfits them]], much like how a fat man tolerates the tapeworms in his intestines. And like those tapeworms, that guild burrowed deep into his innards, and gorged themselves on his leftovers, until they began causing abdominal pain and diarrhea. I realize the metaphor's breaking down a bit here, but Granny Dapper didn't raise no quitters!
-->-- '''[[LemonyNarrator Jack Dapper]]''', ''WebVideo/SwordArtOnlineAbridged''



->'''Darwin:''' Yeah... it sounds like the sea, but more purple.\\
'''Gumball:''' What? No.\\
'''Darwin:''' You're right, it's more like the sound of Christmas, but like, in the desert.\\
'''Gumball:''' What does that even mean?!\\
'''Darwin:''' Yeah, it's more like the sound of a cellphone (''wry smile'') grabbing onto an ice cream cake.
-->-- ''WesternAnimation/TheAmazingWorldOfGumball'', "The Advice"



->An elephant never forgets, but I forget what the elephant remembered.
-->-- '''Ed''', ''WesternAnimation/EdEddNEddy''



->An elephant never forgets, but I forget what the elephant remembered.
-->-- '''Ed''', ''WesternAnimation/EdEddNEddy''

->'''Darwin:''' Yeah... it sounds like the sea, but more purple.\\
'''Gumball:''' What? No.\\
'''Darwin:''' You're right, it's more like the sound of Christmas, but like, in the desert.\\
'''Gumball:''' What does that even mean?!\\
'''Darwin:''' Yeah, it's more like the sound of a cellphone (''wry smile'') grabbing onto an ice cream cake.
-->-- ''WesternAnimation/TheAmazingWorldOfGumball'', "The Advice"



->[Airships] put me in mind of a man who invents a floor that is perfectly smooth, beautifully patterned, never requires cleaning, and never wears out. Unfortunately, the floor cannot be walked upon with nailed shoes or have anything dropped on it, because it's made of high explosive.
-->-- '''UsefulNotes/AdolfHitler'''




->''"[Airships] put me in mind of a man who invents a floor that is perfectly smooth, beautifully patterned, never requires cleaning, and never wears out. Unfortunately, the floor cannot be walked upon with nailed shoes or have anything dropped on it, because it's made of high explosive."''
-->-- '''UsefulNotes/AdolfHitler'''
8th Jan '17 4:53:45 AM Nepeta
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->-- ''Webcomic/{{Hackbent}}

to:

->-- ''Webcomic/{{Hackbent}}
''Webcomic/{{Hackbent}}''
8th Jan '17 4:53:12 AM Nepeta
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->'''Lutark''': Do you know how painful it is to watch you guys not to be with eachother?
->'''Lutark''': It's like eating macaroni without the cheese.
->'''Lutark''': So you end up with some sad bowl of mac and nothing and you're there wishing
->'''Lutark''': 'Damn, this mac looks so sad, it needs some cheese'.
->'''Rodard''': Pardon, am I the pasta in this metaphor or am I the cheese?
->'''Lutark''': Well, I dunno, dude, you're both looking like p sad noodles either way.
->'''Rodard''': Oh.
->-- ''Webcomic/{{Hackbent}}
18th Nov '16 5:40:55 AM VPhantom
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-->-- '''Yahtzee,''' ''WebOriginal/ZeroPunctuation''

to:

-->-- '''Yahtzee,''' ''WebOriginal/ZeroPunctuation''
''WebAnimation/ZeroPunctuation''
20th Jun '16 8:22:17 PM magmablock
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->''"[Airships] put me in mind of a man who invents a floor that is perfectly smooth, beautifully patterned, never requires cleaning, and never wears out. Unfortunately, the floor cannot be walked upon with nailed shoes or have anything dropped on it, because it's made of high explosive."''
-->-- '''UsefulNotes/AdolfHitler'''
9th Jun '16 10:41:15 PM mk097
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->'''Darwin:''' Yeah... it sounds like the sea, but more purple.\\
'''Gumball:''' What? No.\\
'''Darwin:''' You're right, it's more like the sound of Christmas, but like, in the desert.\\
'''Gumball:''' What does that even mean?!\\
'''Darwin:''' Yeah, it's more like the sound of a cellphone (''wry smile'') grabbing onto an ice cream cake.
-->-- ''WesternAnimation/TheAmazingWorldOfGumball'', "The Advice"
28th Apr '16 3:03:45 PM MetalAiAi
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->An elephant never forgets, but I forget what the elephant remembered.
-->-- '''Ed''', ''WesternAnimation/EdEddNEddy''
17th Jan '16 11:05:39 AM Tacitus
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->'''1st Gamestop Clerk''': Aw, yeah...Nuketown!
->'''2nd Gamestop Clerk''': Yeah! I am the Mayor of Nuketown! My campaign promise is pain!
->'''1st Gamestop Clerk''': Oh yeah? Well you can go ahead and crown me Miss Nuketown USA! My talent is tap-dancing...::taps, jazz hands::...on your grave!
->'''3rd Gamestop Clerk''': Oh yeah? Well I'm the city planner of Nuketown! I lay down the infrastructure...so that...transit can run on time...I'll get back to you. ::wanders off::

-->-- Gamestop/Franchise/CallOfDuty Commercial

to:

->'''1st Gamestop Clerk''':
->'''Clerk 1''':
Aw, yeah...Nuketown!
->'''2nd Gamestop Clerk''':
yeah... [[AbridgedArenaArray Nuketown!]]\\
'''Clerk 2''':
Yeah! I am the Mayor of Nuketown! My campaign promise is pain!
->'''1st Gamestop Clerk''':
pain!\\
'''Clerk 1''':
Oh yeah? Well you can go ahead and crown me Miss Nuketown USA! My talent is tap-dancing...::taps, tap-dancing... (''dances, jazz hands::...hands'') on your grave!
->'''3rd Gamestop Clerk''':
grave!\\
'''Clerk 3''':
Oh yeah? Well I'm the city planner of Nuketown! I lay down the infrastructure...infrastructure... so that...that... transit can run on time...time... I'll get back to you. ::wanders off::

(''wanders off'')
-->-- Gamestop/Franchise/CallOfDuty CommercialGamestop commercial for ''Franchise/CallOfDuty''



->You know, people say you should just play the hand you've been dealt in life. You know what? [[ScrewDestiny Fuck that.]] I say that if you get a dealt a bad hand, you throw out your cards, [[FlippingTheTable flip the table]], pull a gun on the dealer and start shooting... life, I guess.

to:

->You know, people say you should just play the hand you've been dealt in life. You know what? [[ScrewDestiny Fuck that.]] I say that if you get a dealt a bad hand, you [[RageQuit throw out your cards, cards]], [[FlippingTheTable flip the table]], pull a gun on the dealer and start shooting... life, I guess.



I wanted to send you this friendly little letter to inform you of your imminent demise. If you're curious about the frequency of which I send these letters, it is merely to instil as much fear as I can. As if basting a turkey. Which I will then proceed to have sex with.\\

to:

I wanted to send you this friendly little letter to inform you of your imminent demise. If you're curious about the frequency of which I send these letters, it is merely to instil instill as much fear as I can. As if basting a turkey. Which I will then proceed to have sex with.\\



'''Sarge:''' [[{{Dissimile}} Except imagine that pretty girl in school]] [[MiniMecha is armor-plated with a titanium polyalloy, and outfitted with fifty millimeter cannons and ammo for days!]]\\

to:

'''Sarge:''' [[{{Dissimile}} Except imagine that pretty girl in school]] [[MiniMecha is armor-plated with a titanium polyalloy, and outfitted with fifty millimeter fifty-millimeter cannons and ammo for days!]]\\



->Whatever it is ''[that makes Communists such killjoys]'', it makes for the kind of person who, when he was a kid, [[TeachersPet used to do next Tuesday's work on last Friday night]], if you know what I mean. Lots of times he used to be a minister's son, which isn't a Communist, exactly, but usually was a Presbyterian, which is not ''as'' bad, but still stinks. Well, what you did to the minister's kid was [[BlackComedyRape tie him to a fence post with his pants off and dip his pecker in fresh cream]] and [[BestialityIsDepraved turn a half-weaned calf loose on him]]. Which is exactly what we ought to do to [[DirtyCommunists all the Communists in the world]], [[NuclearOption except with atom bombs]].

to:

->Whatever it is ''[that [that makes Communists such killjoys]'', killjoys], it makes for the kind of person who, when he was a kid, [[TeachersPet used to do next Tuesday's work on last Friday night]], if you know what I mean. Lots of times he used to be a minister's son, which isn't a Communist, exactly, but usually was a Presbyterian, which is not ''as'' bad, but still stinks. Well, what you did to the minister's kid was [[BlackComedyRape tie him to a fence post with his pants off and dip his pecker in fresh cream]] and [[BestialityIsDepraved turn a half-weaned calf loose on him]]. Which is exactly what we ought to do to [[DirtyCommunists all the Communists in the world]], [[NuclearOption except with atom bombs]].
5th Jan '16 10:55:06 AM Anarquistador
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->'''1st Gamestop Clerk''': Nuketown!
->'''2nd Gamestop Clerk''': Yeah! And I am the Mayor of Nuketown! My campaign promise is pain!
->'''1st Gamestop Clerk''': Oh yeah? Well you can go ahead and crown me Miss Nuketown! And my talent is tap-dancing...::taps, jazz hands::...on your grave!
->'''3rd Gamestop Clerk''': Oh yeah? Well I'm the city planner of Nuketown! I lay down the infrastructure...so that...public transportation can run on time...I'll get back to you. ::wanders off::

to:

->'''1st Gamestop Clerk''': Aw, yeah...Nuketown!
->'''2nd Gamestop Clerk''': Yeah! And I am the Mayor of Nuketown! My campaign promise is pain!
->'''1st Gamestop Clerk''': Oh yeah? Well you can go ahead and crown me Miss Nuketown! And my Nuketown USA! My talent is tap-dancing...::taps, jazz hands::...on your grave!
->'''3rd Gamestop Clerk''': Oh yeah? Well I'm the city planner of Nuketown! I lay down the infrastructure...so that...public transportation transit can run on time...I'll get back to you. ::wanders off::
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