History Quotes / LethalChef

->''"Determined to get better at cooking, especially now that she had a house guest, [[VideoGame/Splatoon2 Pearl]] had decided that she wanted to prepare a meal for her and Marina. What was supposed to be a nice, elegant serving of homemade lasagna ended up being a sloppy, burnt around the edges, bubbling cheesy volcanic eruption of a science experiment gone terribly wrong.\\\

->'''[[Manga/RanmaOneHalf Ranma:]]''' Soup, Akane. How did you manage [[EpicFail to burn soup]]? You'd better hope the EPA never finds out about you...\\

5. When the sauce's color changes a bit, add 45cc of sulfuric acid.\\

->'''Amity:''' We've been here for months and we've made no progress on the portal door. We can't expect Camilla to take care of us forever.\\

'''Shinji:''' Oh... great. (''thinking'') Oh God in Heaven, not again, I can’t go through that... ''food''... again...

-->-- '''Film/CarryOnAbroad''

->'''Rimuru''': Don't tell me that this is going to be that overused trope where the seemingly-skilled hot woman turns out to suck at cooking!
->''(Shion brings out the food, and it is purple, oozing, and emanating an evil miasma)''
->'''Rimuru''': Why, trope, why?!

->'''Brock:''' That's a very strange flavor.
->'''Max:''' I think calling it a flavor at all is going too far.
->'''James:''' There is a hint of how you say, jet fuel, and an after taste of burning truck tires... and for some reason, I can't seem to quite swallow it. It is my conclusion that these [=PokéBlocks=] should be destroyed before anyone eats any of it by mistake.

-->-- ''WesternAnimation/SpongebobSquarepants'', showing what happens when you use ExactWords.

'''Mung''': No Chowder... Believe me, no one will want to eat ''this''.

'''[=P3P=] Heroine:''' I know all about you too, Fuuka. Let's see, Fuuka's codename... Maybe Hacker? Or, Killer Chef?\\

->'''Helmut Spargle''': Your meal is... acceptable.
->'''Bender''': Then why did you only take one bite?
->'''Helmut''': Because my stomach is about to explode.

-> '''[[VideoGame/UnderNightInBirth Hyde Kido]]:''' I-Is this curry?
-> '''[[Franchise/BlazBlue Noel Vermillion]]:''' Hm? Yeah, just regular curry.
-> '''Hyde Kido:''' Why does it look... metallic?
-> '''Noel Vermillion:''' Oh, well that's interesting. Maybe it's because we used ingredients from this world. Oh, but don't worry about the flavor. It's real curry, through and through, I guarantee it!
-> '''Hyde Kido:''' (H-Hell no, it's not! This is DEFINITELY not curry... There's no way. The pressure coursing out of this dish... It's as if the Hollow Night was simmered in a pot and served up on a plate... Screw the flavor guarantee, I just want to know if I'll survive.)

-> '''[[Videogame/Persona4 Yu Narukami:]]''' .....
-> '''[[Videogame/Persona4 Yosuke Hanamura:]]''' Is is just me, or does that looks a little, uh...
-> '''Yu Narukami:''' They've definitely taken some poetic license with the definition of pudding.
-> '''Yosuke Hanamura:''' Can get that license revoked somehow? It's like something out of a nightmare. It was looking almost edible a minute ago. What happened? And how can it be black and weirdly rainbowy at the same time?
-> '''Yu Narukami:''' ...The same way the puddles at a gas station can.
-> '''Yosuke Hanamura:''' This is 100% not good!
-->-- ''Videogame/BlazblueCrossTagBattle'', describing Noel Vermillion's attempt to make pudding (Extra Episode)

->'''Hisui:''' ...I understand. If you do not mind, then I will make something [to eat].
->'''Shiki:''' —! Yes! For real, Hisui!?
->'''Hisui:''' Yes. But since you insisted, you are bringing this on yourself.
->'''Shiki:''' Eh...?
->'''(Narration):''' Saying something incredibly ominous, Hisui heads towards the kitchen.

->Asuka's cooking isn't just bad, it's almost supernatural. When she steps into a kitchen, strange things start to happen. It's like she turns off the Earth's magnetic field.

->Hurry! Put it in your mouth before the bowl melts!

->'''[[SlimeGirl Suu]]:''' I'm detecting a truly unique flavor, and a distinct bouquet of insecticide. If, as people say, "cooking is a form of love♥", this dish is clearly StockholmSyndrome.
-->-- ''Manga/MonsterMusume, I ♥ Monster Girls'', volume 2

-->-- '''Anime/PokemonTheSeriesRubyAndSapphire''', [[Recap/PokemonS7E50PokeblockStockAndBerry PokéBlock, Stock, and Berry]]

->It'd be surprising if Chef Hatchet could make toast right. Toast that isn't soggy or green or is still on fire, or somehow all three at once.
-->-- Tyler, ''Fanfic/TotalDramaComebackSeries''

->I'd offer to cook you dinner, but you look pretty miserable already.
-->-- Steve Rogers, ''Film/AvengersEndgame''

->Molly once burned my egg. My boiled egg. I don't know how.

->Me-me's hamburger-olive loaf is so bad, it should be in jail.

->Carl, you don't cook, you burn. You burn eggs, you burn toast. You're the only man I know who burns Jell-O.

->Even Franchise/HannibalLecter couldn't keep that woman's cooking down!

->They say that in the army,\\

And killed a friend of mine.

->Our old mess sergeant's taste buds have been shot off in the war,\\

It makes a fellow proud to be a soldier!
-->-- ''Music/TomLehrer'', "It Makes A Fellow Proud To Be A Soldier"

->We'll have to blast 'em out. They heard we feed our prisoners C rations.
-->-- '''Bill Mauldin's''' ''Willie and Joe,'' commenting on a German bunker that has refused to surrender

->Arthur, you’re aware the point of giving us separate meals is so that we can’t both get food poisoning? There’s really not much point if you’re just going to poison us in two different ways.

->You better prepare yourself. Because this... this will be the most difficult quest yet. Supreme Kai of Time's cooking is... well, it's more destructive than any Shenron out there.

->actually, that spaghetti from earlier...it wasn't too bad for my brother. since he started cooking lessons, he's been improving a lot. i bet if he keeps it up, next year he'll even make something edible.

->Guy's restaurant should be shut down and he should be prosecuted to the furthest extent of the law for making toasted marshmallows taste like fish. That's like a dream wrapped in a nightmare. That sounds like something you'd find on the floor of a strip club in Thailand after the strippers ran out of ping pong balls.

->I didn't know you could burn ''juice''.

->"I think she's using the same recipe I used to make my topographical map of Mexico."

-->-- '''Anime/{{Pokemon}}''', [[Recap/PokemonS7E50PokeblockStockAndBerry PokéBlock, Stock, and Berry]]

-->-- ''VideoGame/{{Persona 4}}''

->'''[[LethalChef Yukiko]]''': U-Um...sorry, I did make some [cookies] with [[SupremeChef Shinjiro-san]], but those are his. The ones I made turned out like this...(takes out cookies)
->'''Kanji''': Huh, are those mud balls in the shape of pigs?
->'''Yukiko''': They're bear-shaped cocoa cookies!
->'''Teddie''': ''This'' is what bears look like to you, Yuki-chan?[[note]]Teddie is a ''literal'' bear.[[/note]]
->'''Yukiko''': I'm sorry, they're a bit off, aren't they?
->'''Kanji''': "[[{{Understatement}} A bit]]"?
->'''Yukiko''': They didn't turn out so well, so I asked Shinjiro-san to give you the ones he made.
->'''P4 Protag''': I think the thought alone is enough to make Rei happy.
->'''Rei''': Mm-hm! Can I have those too, Yuki?
->'''Yukiko''': Huh? But...
->'''P4 Protag''': Sorry, no. You really shouldn't. [[ContinuityNod I'm not kidding! It's dangerous!]]
->'''Rei''': Thanks for the food! (takes bite of cookies)
->'''Yosuke''': Ack, don't do it! You're taking your life in your hands!
->'''Rei''': Hrm? That's an interesting texture. It's delicious, too!
->'''Shinjiro''': Wha—! How could those be!?
->'''Junpei''': Whose cooking do you think is dangerous? Hers or Fuuka's?
->'''Shinjiro''': That's...that's...nnh...ughhh. Just thinking about it makes my stomach hurt.

-->-- '''FlavorText for Hu Tao's "Ghostly March dish,''' ''VideoGame/GenshinImpact''

->"He burnt my fries!"\\
"He burnt my Krabby Patty!"\\
"He burnt my shake!"

->'''Curtis:''' First you want to [[AttackHello kill me]], now you want to feed me.

-->-- Manga/DailyLifeWithMonsterGirl, I ♥ Monster Girls, volume 2

-->-- ''Manga/SasamekiKoto''