History Quotes / CardCarryingVillain

->'''Brea:''' You're all monsters!\\

->'''The Star Child:''' Look, I get that you Dark Eldar will literally die and get swallowed by Slaanesh if you don't act the scoundrel. That has evidently been a problem for everyone for a few millennia now.\\
'''[[EvilOverlord Vect]]:''' True.\\
'''[[TortureTechnician Rakarth]]''': Define "problem".

->'''[[TheConscience Ethical Bug]]:''' Y-you're not gonna shoot a puppy, are you Jack?\\
'''Big Jack Horner:''' Yeah, [[CrossingTheLineTwice in the face]]. Why?
-->-- ''WesternAnimation/PussInBootsTheLastWish''

'''Big Jack Horner:''' Yeah, [[CrossingTheLineTwice in the face]]. Why?\\

->''"There's good guys and there's bad guys in this world, and make no mistake about it, ladies and gentleman, I am a bad, '''bad''' man."''

->''"Vect... You know, I still do not understand you. [...] I can appreciate, to an extent, that [[PoweredByAForsakenChild you MUST indulge in malefic red room nonsense to live]], but... Must you show such... ''repulsive'' glee in doing it?"''

-->-- '''"Gentleman" Johnny Marcone''', ''Literature/BriefCases'', "Even Hand]]"

-> ''"Wow, I AM evil! I should have been the devil instead!"

-->-- ''WesternAnimation/LegionOfSuperHeroes''

-->--''VideoGame/MortalKombat1''

-->-- '''Zenjiro Kasai''' sums his boss Sicks perfectly, ''Manga/NeuroSupernaturalDetective''.

[[folder:Fanfiction]]
->'''Arina''': "You filthy creature! How could you do such an awful thing to someone as pure as her?!"\\
'''Lord Komatsu''': "Because I'm ''evil''. Duh."

->''"I'm a real naughty boy, I'm sure you'll agree"''

-->--'''General Malice''', ''WesternAnimation/HumanResources2022''

->'''Shang Tsung:''' ''[EvilChuckle]'' [[ItsWhatIDo It is what I]] ''[[ItsWhatIDo do]],'' Kitana.

->'"'Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh. I want to tell you both a little secret. Your question is all wrong! (''laughs'') What you 'want' from this? Children, ''please!'' [[ForTheEvulz If you're not loving what you're doing, then you're in the wrong field!]]"''

->''[[CatchPhrase I'm Doctor Horrible!]] I have a [[MorallyAmbiguousDoctorate Ph. D in Horribleness]]!''

->''Hello, [=McFly=]? I'm ''evil''!''

->''Wow, that is the most blunt villain ever! I should really hate what an obvious cardboard cut-out he is, but to be honest, it's kind of refreshing. I just LOVE the lack of creativity with him! It's like he just came out and said: I'm the antagonist. I tied your girlfriend to the railroad tracks, put a bomb on a bridge, and ate puppies for dinner. No reason, I'm just evil.''

->''I'm evil. ''Get it?

->''I don't mean to be mean all the time. I just am.''

->''My name's '''DARK-Matter'''. What's the surprise here?''

->''One of the nice things about being evil is, you get to lie a lot.''

->''And then there was the time I restructured the DNA of our class's pet hamster; turned it into a tapeworm; that was ESPECIALLY evil. Draw that next!''

->''Think nasty, think nasty, think nasty!''

->''My own mother [[YouMonster thought I was a monster]]. ''[{{Beat}}]'' She was ''right'' of course. But it still'' hurt.

->''It's not fair. Somewhere out there, there's a more evil Bender than me. I DO MY WORST, DAMN IT!''

->''I'm not the DamselInDistress.\\

Nope... I'm the bad guy.''

->''So much evil to do, so little time.''

->''With this weapon I will shroud all the planets of the Pentangle in a permanent fog of gloomy darkness and depression forever!''

->''I love to hate! I love to hate! Simply nothing else can make me feel so great! There's nothing more delicious than being gloriously vicious, and by far it is my most outstanding trait!''

->''Crack out the chemistry set, Betty. We have a light to extinguish!''

->''That would make us happy, to see everyone unhappy! We love to see people unhappy! We love it! We love it!''

->''It should be enough that I say that everything is okay. And it is. Or maybe an Evil version of okay. Like E-kay… You know what, I don’t think that’s going to catch on. ''

->''What is it about the name 'Dr. Insano' that eludes you people?!''

->''What do you ''want'' from us?! We're '''evil!''' '''''EVIL!'''

->'"'Patience is not one of my virtues. Well, actually, I don't have any virtues, but if I did, I'm sure patience wouldn't be one of them."''

->''You know, I always felt this place was missing a real villain. Hence my humble contribution.''

->''I use my powers for evil\\

I use them any way I please''

->''I ain't nice, no I'm ''quite'' a dick,\\

I'm in it for the money and fame!''

->''I will not apologize''\\

''I'm making a career of evil''

->''I do it all because I'm evil,\\

your tears are all the pay I'll ever need.''

->''If all the world's a stage\\

But it's mine to tear apart!''

->''It is not that I cannot make anything good, but that I will not.''

-> '''Bill''': (as Walter walks out of a door while smiling) Aah. Being a greasy, evil creep is its own reward. The greasiness! The evil! The creepiness! So satisfying!
-->-- ''Podcast/RiffTrax'', Film/KissOfTheTarantula

->''Wrestling/RingOfHonor, a place where respect, and tradition, are applauded. Where handshakes and praise are common found. But what ever happened to the men devoted to wickedness? Well fear no more, for this may be the place where the heroes are made, make room for the one true villain.''

->''I am ''not'' a good person. I have never ''been'' a good person.''

->''I was the most diabolical man in the history of this business. I've got a mind that just... works as a villain. True villains can't pretend to be anything else, they are what they are.''

->Often, villains are fond of claiming that they are misquoted, or misunderstood, or really oppressed heroes whose names have been unjustly tarred by vengeful enemies. Not so the Nephandi: they know what they are and they accept it, with no mamby-pamby moralizing or angst-ridden bemoaning of the fact. After all, [[MindRape having your Avatar ripped inside out]] tends to remove the ambiguity from your worldview.

->[[ThenLetMeBeEvil Some Nosferatu take the Victorian mindset to heart]], becoming embodiments of the blackest evils [[BeautyEqualsGoodness they so visibly represent]]. These Nosferatu are true horrors, [[ForTheEvulz inflicting pain and misery for the vicarious thrill it gives them]], and [[EvilLaugh cackling]] whenever new fiendishness comes their way. These Sewer Rats are usually the bullies and terrors of their nests, [[KickTheDog victimizing even other Nosferatu]] when a lack of other targets presents itself. Thankfully, these Nosferatu rarely accumulate influence of any standing value or length, and are soon undone by the weight of the own wickedness. Ultimately, they destroy themselves - or force others to bring them down, for if they [[SanitySlippage haven't fallen to the Beast]] soon after deciding to become such malicious creatures, [[TheDogBitesBack few of their fellow Nosferatu]] have any qualms about convincing other Kindred that it's only a matter of time until they ''do'', [[PragmaticVillainy and it's in everyone's best interests to get rid of them now]].

->''If a man dedicates his life to good deeds and the welfare of others, [[BeingGoodSucks he will die unthanked and unremembered]]. If he exercises his genius bringing misery and death to billions, [[FamedInStory his name will echo down through the millennia for a hundred lifetimes]]. Infamy is always more preferable to ignominy.''

->''And therefore, since I cannot prove a lover,\\

And ''hate'' the idle pleasures of these days.''

->''The pendant's burning tells me that my heart is evil...That's good to know.''

->''Evil is actually in my job description.''

->''My wicked intellect will lead us to victory.''

->''We have no need for illusions or euphemisms between us, [[HelloInsertNameHere Troper]]. There are those who fight consistently for the side of right, and they are heroes. And then there are those like us, who know how to turn the powers of the world to our advantage without care for the cost to others, and we are called villains. Personally, I would rather be the latter any day.''

->''We just love being mean!''

->''Ware ga akuma da!'' (I am ''the'' devil!)

->''Look at me! I am sublime! I AM THE TRUE FACE OF EVIL!!!''

->''Most villains don't ''think'' they're evil. They think they're ''[[KnightTemplar heroes]]''. Not me. I'm reclaiming it: EVIL WIZARD! I'm rotten to the bone, and I don't care who knows it!''

->''So tell me, heretic, is this God of yours a compassionate one? I doubt even He has room in His divine heart for such an unusually talented sinner as me.''

->''I am an evil scientist! What did you expect?''

->''Who am I? I'm the scariest motherfucker you're ever gonna meet! I'm Cook-Cook, bitch, better not forget it!''

->''I must play in this game by my rules!\\

If you ask me again, I will show you the same!''

->''Vect... You know, I still do not understand you. [...] I can appreciate, to an extent, that [[PoweredByAForsakenChild you MUST indulge in malefic red room nonsense to live]], but... Must you show such... ''repulsive'' glee in doing it?''

->''Now I'll be the first to admit: [[FantasticRacism Humans are the WORST.]] ''*gestures to himself*'' Case in point.''

->''Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh. I want to tell you both a little secret. Your question is all wrong! (''laughs'') What you 'want' from this? Children, ''please!'' [[ForTheEvulz If you're not loving what you're doing, then you're in the wrong field!]]''

->''[[EvilLaugh NYAHAHAHAHA!]]'' ''I'M SO'' '''EVIL!'''

->''As a reward for your honesty there, I'll let you in on a little evil secret. What I [[ShutUpElves said up there to Dorukan]] about overwhelming force? That's only part of Colonel Xykon's secret recipe for winning. It's not just about raw power, it's also about how far you're willing to debase yourself before feeling bad. And me? [[OurLichesAreDifferent I ripped off my own living flesh so that I wouldn't have to admit weakness]]. You're strictly little league compared to that. That right there? That's the difference between bonafide true Evil with a capital E and your whiny [[WellIntentionedExtremist "evil, but for a good cause"]] crap. [[EvilerThanThou One gets to be the butch, and one gets to be the bitch]]... [[ThisIsForEmphasisBitch bitch]].''

->''Cheers, to the ship that charmed the devil.''

->''Prepare for trouble, and make it double\\

To extend our wrath to the stars above''

->''You are now official Decepticon warriors. Go out there and be as violent as you can be!''

->''This will be the story of how I became the greatest demon lord of all!''

->''My aim....hm.....Ah! Yes. That would actually be very simple. I want your powers as Spirit to turn the ways of the world upside down....In order to topple the restraints of this world. But your existence in this world is stable. I wonder what I have to do to make you despair?''

->''You know, Guile, evil is a good career choice. It has a lot to offer.''

-> ''Hey Tetsu. Have you ever thought about 'evil'? In the world these days... The idea that [[RousseauWasRight all people all inherently good]] gets tossed a lot. The law represents that. 'There's no such a thing as a [[EnfantTerrible person who was born evil]]', '[[GreyAndGrayMorality From the point of view of the person committing the crime, they had a reason for it]]'... Like that. You've probably seen in in mangas and movies, haven't you? All those final bosses that seemed like [[WellIntentionedExtremist 'he was actually a good guy']], [[EvenEvilHasLovedOnes 'he just did evil things for the sake of his friends']] or [[DrivenToVillainy 'he did evil things to overcome his own personal trauma']]. Even if they are defeated... That kind of half-assed evil can never be clear-cut. Anyway, it has gotten to be the generally accepted opinion that nobody in this world is pure "evil".''\\\

''Not impure evil like [[NecessarilyEvil necessary evil]] or resultant evil or anything. '[[TheSociopath Absolute Evil]]'. '''That person''' watched the [[MindRape electronic drug]] that made even my questionable soul waver. [[NightmareFace While grinning]]. Wearing an expression like... 'I wonder what element of this was leading people astray?'. All [[SlouchOfVillainy while sitting on]] a [[DeadGuyOnDisplay favourite piece of furniture he recently got]]. Just being with him... [[EvenEvilHasStandards Fills me with the urge to throw up. And it gets that I'm disgusted with even alive...]] Even then, this 'evil' is charismatic enough that I can't get away from it. If you were doing a ''good job...'', I figured I'd take you to him but I guess I've been disappointing.[...] Hihihi, How considerate, You'll understand someday... No, you'll... probably never understand him. Sorry to bother you Tetsu. Well... Have a peaceful life.'' [sets Tetsu's garage on fire.]

->''Redditch is dead! And I killed him! Now it is [=DePrayve=]'s turn to live... to exult in the richness of evil!''

->''I am lord of evil, little man -- forever and always!''

->''I am not the hero in my own story. I am the bad guy. I have no end in mind that justifies my means. There are no skeletons in my closet, no [[TragicVillain abusive childhood or inciting misery]] that might expiate my vile behavior. Nor am I insane. I know the difference between good and evil. And I am fully capable of empathizing with the pain, emotional or physical, of others. No [[TheSociopath sociopath]], I. Rather, [[BadIsGoodAndGoodIsBad I simply prefer bad over good. Wrong over right. Dirty over clean. Sick over healthy. Untrue over true.]]''

->''Y'see, deep down, in my most secret heart of hearts, I'm still a totally depraved sonuvabitch whose main goal in life is to watch you die. Slowly and painfully. Just like your kid.''

->''What can I say? I'm a ''bad guy''. I do ''bad'' things. It's my ''job''. And [[BetterLivingThroughEvil it beats working retail.]]''

->''""The fact I derive pleasure from cruelty doesn't make me feel guilty, Frank... guilt is ridiculous. There is no 'good' or 'bad'. There is only pleasure and pain... with no Heaven or Hell at the end of it!""''

->''HAHAHA ITS SO NICE BEING A BAD GUY!''

->''In my defense, Lady, you should have seen that coming.''

->''I once thought that the greatest evil in this world was done in [[WellIntentionedExtremist the name of the greater good.]] I was wrong. Terribly wrong. There is evil in this world which knows itself for evil, and hates the good with all its strength. All fair things does it desire to destroy.''

->''What do we care about nice?\\

To be as mean as we can!''

->It feels so good to be bad\\

It feels so good to be bad

->Oh, I love it when I'm nasty!

->''I am bad, and that's good. I will never be good, and that's not bad. [[BeYourself There's no-one I'd rather be than me.]]''

->''Doesn't it feel so GOOD... to be BAD?''

->''Actually, I'm an evil scientist.''

->''I'm a greedy little [[WesternAnimation/TheSmurfs Smurf]] who [[OnlyInItForTheMoney did it for the money]]!''

->''Good morning, my golden retrievers! What kind of havoc shall the Carver Media Group create in the world today?''

->''Remember, if this makes the papers, we're no longer the Wet Bandits, we're the Sticky Bandits!''

->''I am Lord Zedd, sworn enemy of all that is good and decent!''

->''God, I love being a bad guy.''

->''You are deluded, Captain. You pretend to be a simple soldier, but in reality, you are just afraid to admit that we have left humanity behind. Unlike you, I embrace it proudly, without fear!''

->''Aw, get this straight!\\

cos I'm Mean and Green! AND I AM BAD!''

->''Hear me, believe me, and fear me!''

->''I like being bad. It makes me happy.''

->"We all have flaws," he said, "and mine is being wicked."

-> ''I'' like ''people thinking I'm an asshole. Being an asshole is my life's vocation; I'm a goddamned asshole professional. When other people act like assholes, they're doing it on their own time, but me, it's my'' job.

->''We are different from all the oligarchies of the past, in that we know what we are doing.''

->''You figure that out all by yourself? The god of evil is evil?''

->''Evil, be thou my good.''

->''I am a [[TheDon professional monster]].\\

[[BadassNormal I made a choice]].''

->''I am "the world's worst evil god" after all.''

->''Distrusting me was the wisest thing you've done since you climbed off your horse.''

->''I ain't no suit wearing businessman like you. I'm JustAGangster, I suppose.''

->''We're VILLAINS! When are you gonna get that through your thick skulls?''

->''Patience is not one of my virtues. Well, actually, I don't have any virtues, but if I did, I'm sure patience wouldn't be one of them.''

-> ''You know, some experts say that sick people, people like me, you know, that ultimately we want to be caught. That the mistakes we make are intentional. Or that we stray from some particular course of action because we like the risk. Those experts are morons. I have no intention of being caught.''

->''I ain't no suit wearing businessman like you. I'm just a gangsta, I suppose.''