History Main / IWantMyBeLovedToBeHappy

'''In extreme cases, this can be paired with a DeathTrope. Administrivia/YouHaveBeenWarned.'''

* A platonic example occurs on the ''WebVideo/DreamSMP''. After finding out that Ranboo married [[HeterosexualLifePartners Tubbo]], Tommy was initially somewhat hostile towards Ranboo due to a fear of being replaced, but he becomes much more civil and amicable about it after knowing that Ranboo makes Tubbo happy.

-->'''Yukari:''' He's the most desirable {{Bishonen}} in school! If you don't make a move now, you may never get another chance!
-->'''Hitomi:''' Uh, actually, it sounds like ''you're'' really into him. Are you sure ''you'' don't want to make a move on him?
-->'''Yukari:''' No! You've loved Amano for years! I could ''never'' stand in the way of your happiness...
-->'''Hitomi:''' Actually, I just met him today. Are you sure you're not projecting just a little?
-->'''Yukari:''' ...Okay, Hitomi. If it's for my best friend, I guess I have no choice. I'll stand aside, and give you a chance at happiness with Amano!
-->'''Hitomi:''' Um, okay....

Contrast MurderTheHypotenuse, GreenEyedMonster, AttemptedHomewrecker, and LoveMakesYouEvil. Compare/contrast LovedINotHonorMore. Diametric opposite to IfICantHaveYou. SisterTrope to PrizedPossessionGiveaway (when a character gives another the material possession they treasure the most, knowing that the other character will be happy by receiving it).

* A platonic example occurs on the ''LetsPlay/DreamSMP''. After finding out that Ranboo married [[HeterosexualLifePartners Tubbo]], Tommy was initially somewhat hostile towards Ranboo due to a fear of being replaced, but he becomes much more civil and amicable about it after knowing that Ranboo makes Tubbo happy.

Under TheFourLoves, this would be classified as ''Agape'': seeking the other person's good unconditionally, even if there's nothing else in it for you. Also see RomanticFalseLead, ActOfTrueLove, UnrequitedLove and InsecureLoveInterest.

Contrast MurderTheHypotenuse, GreenEyedMonster, and LoveMakesYouEvil. Compare/contrast LovedINotHonorMore. Diametric opposite to IfICantHaveYou. SisterTrope to PrizedPossessionGiveaway (when a character gives another the material possession they treasure the most, knowing that the other character will be happy by receiving it).

[[folder:Real Life]]
* Interpretations vary, but Creator/SorenKierkegaard basically did this to his fiancée Regine when he abandoned her. He went as far as to destroy his own public reputation so that people would think that she had broken up with him because he was the problem. In the time they lived in, a man breaking off an engagement with a woman reflected really badly on the woman, and could ruin her reputation for years. Kierkegaard didn't want to see this happen to Regine. The emotional fallout became the backdrop for his writings about philosophy and religion.
* This is a pretty common (and fairly painful) example of TruthInTelevision. One example which may be more relevant to Website/TVTropes as a whole is the case of fans following an actor's love life. While the LoonyFan who [[StalkerWithACrush breaks into a celebrity's house]] may make the news, many other fans are simultaneously {{Squee}}ing over how cute the couple is and sad that it means their favorite crush is now off-limits (not that they were ever a realistic option, but don't crush the poor fan's dreams).
* This type of love for another is referred to as ''[[TheFourLoves agape]]'' by most Christian churches: to love others to such a degree that you place their needs above your own, even if you don't benefit from it or suffer because of it. It is regarded as the highest form of love.
* "If you truly love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, it's yours forever; if it doesn't, it never was to begin with." -- an old proverb.
* People who are terminally ill or who know they may not return alive may encourage their significant others to start searching ([[https://www.nytimes.com/2017/03/03/style/modern-love-you-may-want-to-marry-my-husband.html example]]). Latter scenarios may overlap with IfIDoNotReturn.
[[/folder]]

** Near the end of the episode where a woman replaces Krusty. They're about to get married when Bart shows her a compilation of clips showing how he used to treat his previous wives. She is unbothered by this, however, Krusty realises he'd only hurt her and leaves the altar.

* A dark version in "Literature/TheLittleMermaid." The title character, now a [[TongueTrauma mute]] human, needs to marry the prince in order to gain an immortal soul; if he goes through with his PerfectlyArrangedMarriage to another girl, the mermaid will dissolve into sea-foam [[CessationOfExistence and get no afterlife]]. She's given an out: if she ''kills'' the prince with a magic dagger and lets his blood splash on her legs, she'll turn back into a mermaid and at least regain her natural 300-year lifespan. She can't go through with it, dies, [[spoiler:[[BittersweetEnding but is granted the opportunity to earn her OWN afterlife because of her sacrifice]]]].

* Myth/ArthurianLegend: Modern tellings often have Arthur tolerate the love affair between Guinevere and Lancelot because he loves them ''both'' too much to see them suffer. Guinevere refuses to run off with Lancelot despite her love for him because she still loves Arthur too.
** In ''Literature/TheMistsOfAvalon'', Arthur's solution to this problem is a threesome.
** In season 2 of ''Series/{{Merlin|2008}}'', Lancelot refuses to return to Camelot because he believes Prince Arthur and Guenevere are the OneTruePairing. This is after ''they've'' agreed that a romance is out of the question.
** This is the central plot of the webcomic ''Webcomic/ArthurKingOfTimeAndSpace''. At one point, Arthur ''had'' banished Guinevere and Lancelot in the Space and Fairytale arcs, but at least partly because he thought they'd be happier together without him. He was wrong.

* The famous JudgmentOfSolomon, where the king hears the case of two women who each claim a baby is hers - he rules that the court should [[InsaneTrollLogic simply cut the kid in two and give half to each woman]]. One woman objects and asks him to give the baby to her rival and spare his life, showing herself to be the real mother.

** In an episode where Peter was lost at sea and presumed dead, Lois ended up remarrying Brian (who has always held a torch for Lois), When Brian discovers that Lois and Peter are having an affair behind his back he goes to confront them, but overhears Lois breaking off the affair with Peter because of the commitment she made to Brian. In response, Brian promptly agrees to end the marriage so Lois can go back and be with Peter.

* ''WesternAnimation/HeyArnold'' used this a few times to underscore that Helga's adoration of Arnold went beyond mere infatuation.

* ''WesternAnimation/TheLegendOfKorra'': The series has this with Korra. Korra is often portrayed as stubborn and even a bit selfish. In a heartwarming gesture, she shows that she can be selfless by allowing Mako, who she is in love with, to be with his then-girlfriend Asami. Korra even goes so far as to befriend Asami and tell Mako to go to her when she needs him. Then, in a twist by itself, Mako admits to having strong feelings for Korra as well and knows how much it hurts her to see him with Asami. Finally, Korra and Mako break up because of their conflicting personalities and that they are better as friends, leading to [[spoiler:Korra and Asami ending up dating each other at the end of the series. And one of the things that helped them bound was the fact that they both dated the same guy.]] And to twist it even further, by the series finale, Mako himself may have grown to feel this about [[spoiler:Korra and Asami's relationship. [[WordOfGod The writers have stated that they think Mako will always carry a bit of a torch for Korra]], and a fairly popular AlternateCharacterInterpretation is that Mako telling Korra that he's got her back, and he always will, was him saying that he understood and supported her and Asami's developing relationship. If you subscribe to that interpretation, his last scene in the series becomes this trope.]]

* ''WesternAnimation/MyLittlePonyFriendshipIsMagic'': For the longest time, Spike has been close to Rarity; when she was attempting to win the heart of Trenderhoof in "Simple Ways", he decides to help her.

** In the episode "Things Change", Beast Boy encounters an unnamed schoolgirl bearing a striking resemblance to his once-petrified girlfriend Terra. Eager to resume their relationship, he is met with considerable resistance on her part, as she repeatedly explains to Beast Boy that she does not wish to be associated with Terra, or Terra's bad deeds. Ultimately, Beast Boy realizes the strain he's putting her through when she explains that, though he may enjoy being a Titan, ''she'' [[IJustWantToBeNormal just wants to be normal]], and he leaves her to enjoy a normal life while he goes off to assist his team with a new threat.

* ''WesternAnimation/TheOwlHouse'' gives us a platonic example with Eda, who doesn't seem very fond of former mean-girl Amity. That said, she's nothing but supportive to her apprentice/foster daughter's crush on the girl and is happy to encourage her if that's what she wants.

* Myth/KingArthur: Modern tellings often have Arthur tolerate the love affair between Guinevere and Lancelot because he loves them ''both'' too much to see them suffer. Guinevere refuses to run off with Lancelot despite her love for him because she still loves Arthur too.

** Lancelot and Galehaut also get interpreted this way. In the legends, they're friends with a lot of HoYay (including Galehaut [[LoveAtFirstSight seeming enamored at first sight]]). Later, Galehaut helps set up the affair with Guinevere, which to modern readers seems like this trope plus IncomptibleOrientation.

* Myth/KingArthur:
** Many tellings of the legend have him tolerate the love affair between his wife Guinevere and champion knight Lancelot because he loves them ''both'' too much to see them suffer.
** Guinevere refuses to run off with Lancelot despite her love for him because she still loves Arthur too.
** In the TV adaptation of ''Literature/TheMistsOfAvalon'', Arthur's solution to this problem is a threesome.

** This is the central plot of the webcomic ''Webcomic/ArthurKingOfTimeAndSpace''. At one point, Arthur ''had'' banished Guenevere and Lancelot in the Space and Fairytale arcs, but at least partly because he thought they'd be happier together without him. He was wrong.

* This is a pretty common (and fairly painful) example of TruthInTelevision. One example which may be more relevant to Wiki/TVTropes as a whole is the case of fans following an actor's love life. While the LoonyFan who [[StalkerWithACrush breaks into a celebrity's house]] may make the news, many other fans are simultaneously {{Squee}}ing over how cute the couple is and sad that it means their favorite crush is now off-limits (not that they were ever a realistic option, but don't crush the poor fan's dreams).

* In ''Series/TheMuppets'' episode "Swine Song", Denise sees Kermit and Piggy singing a duet, and even though Kermit insists it was just part of the show decides to bow out.

* Torahiko Ooshima in VisualNovel/{{Morenatsu}} is shown to be this if you don't pick him. He is known by fans as the "Canon" Route of the story. The sad thing is, [[DevelopmentHell you can't pick his storyline yet.]]

* ''WesternAnimation/TeenTitans'':

* Every route in ''VisualNovel/PrincessWaltz'' ends with this. [[spoiler: in the first half of the game, Chris sacrifices herself for Arata. And in the second half of the game, Arata and whichever partner you choose to fall in love with but that girl ultimately steps out of the way so he can be with Chris after she is saved.]]

* {{Inverted}} in the Season 2 finale of ''WesternAnimation/HarleyQuinn2019''. After ComicBook/PoisonIvy cheats on [[RomanticRunnerUp Kite Man]] with Harley, he's devastated but ends up being convinced to give her a second chance. However, after seeing that she still has feelings for her, he grows out of his ExtremeDoormat tendencies and asserts that ''he'' deserves to be happy with someone who won't betray his trust before leaving her to be with Harley.

** In the episode "Things Change", Beast Boy encounters an unnamed schoolgirl bearing a striking resemblance to his once-petrified girlfriend Terra. Eager to resume their relationship, he is met with considerable resistance on her part, when she repeatedly explains to Beast Boy that she does not wish to be associated with Terra, or Terra's bad deeds. Ultimately, Beast Boy realizes the strain he's putting her through when she explains that, though he may enjoy being a Titan, ''she'' [[IJustWantToBeNormal just wants to be normal]], and he leaves the schoolgirl to enjoy a normal life, and attend to his responsibilities.
** A variant happens in the ''ComicBook/TeenTitansGo'' continuation comics, when Terra's brother Geoforce shows up looking for her. Beast Boy tells him about the schoolgirl, and he confirms when they visit the school that she is indeed Terra; but when he sees that she's happier now than she ever has been, they leave without speaking to her. However, Terra does notice her brother out of the corner of her eyes and is happy to but she notices him out of the corner of her eye and seems happy to see him.
* ''WesternAnimation/ThunderCats2011'': Lion-O finds out that his crush Cheetarah prefers his older brother Tygra over him and always had. While he does go on to encourage their relationship in front of their friends, he does take Cheetarah aside in private to call her out for her flirtatious methods of supporting and encouraging him, which led to the misunderstanding in the first place. He ''does'' want them both to be happy, especially since he and his brother are ''finally'' starting to get on good terms for the first time in their entire lives, but that doesn't necessarily mean he's happy ''about'' it.

** [[DoggedNiceGuy Cody]]. He liked Gwen but didn't know that Gwen was clearly the OfficialCouple with his friend Trent. Once he figured it out, though, he decided to help set them up together. This is averted in Season 3. By this point, Gwen and Trent have broken up, and Cody makes it clear that he's hoping she'll give him another chance. However, he's once again oblivious to the fact that she likes somebody else--Duncan, a friend of hers who's TroubledButCute at best and a JerkAss at worst, and already involved with someone else. When the two secretly kiss in the bathroom and later get found out, Cody's reaction is to punch Duncan in the face and continue flirting with Gwen.

* A dark version in "Literature/TheLittleMermaid." The title character, now a [[TongueTrauma mute]] human, needs to marry the prince in order to gain an immortal soul; if he goes through with his PerfectlyArrangedMarriage to another girl, the mermaid will dissolve into sea-foam [[CessationOfExistence and get no afterlife]]. She's given an out: if she ''kills'' the prince with a magic dagger and lets his blood splash on her legs, she'll turn back into a mermaid and at least regain her natural 300-year lifespan. She can't go through with it, dies [[spoiler:[[BittersweetEnding but is granted the opportunity to earn her OWN afterlife because of her sacrifice]]]].

* King Solomon's judgment regarding a child in dispute by two women - he proposes to simply [[InsaneTrollLogic cut the kid in two for each mother to have an equal part]], and one of the women says to just give the child to the other. This proved to Solomon that ''she'' was the mother, for being that selfless.

* A dark version in "Literature/TheLittleMermaid." The title character, now a [[TongueTrauma tongueless]] human, needs to marry the prince in order to gain an immortal soul; if he goes through with his PerfectlyArrangedMarriage to another girl, the mermaid will dissolve into sea-foam [[CessationOfExistence and get no afterlife]]. She's given an out: if she ''kills'' the prince with a magic dagger and puts his blood on her legs, she'll turn back into a mermaid and at least retain her natural 300-year lifespan. She can't go through with it, [[spoiler:[[BittersweetEnding dies, but gets an afterlife in reward for her sacrifice]]]].

** Played straight in Season 3. [[spoiler:Jackie breaks up with Marco because she knows he's unhappy with life on Earth after spending so much time on Mewni, and implicitly because she knows he'd be happier with Star. Later, when Marco realizes that he has a crush on Star, he holds off on telling her because she had already moved on by that point to start dating Tom, a friend he cares too much about to hurt.]]

** In the episode "Things Change", Beast Boy encounters a Schoolgirl bearing a striking resemblance to his once petrified former girlfriend Terra. Eager to resume the relationship, he is met with considerable resistance on the part of the Schoolgirl when she repeatedly explains to Beast Boy that she does not wish to be associated with Terra, or Terra's bad deeds. Ultimately, Beast Boy realizes the strain he has put The Schoolgirl through when she explains that, though he may enjoy being a Titan, ''she'' [[IJustWantToBeNormal just wants to be normal]], and he leaves the Schoolgirl to enjoy a normal life, and attend to his responsibilities.
** A variant happens in the ''ComicBook/TeenTitansGo'' comics continuing the series when Terra's brother Geoforce shows up looking for her. Beast Boy tells him about the Schoolgirl and he goes to look at her from afar, [[spoiler:recognizing her as Terra,]] he is amazed that she looks happier now than she ever did in her life. He leaves without speaking to her, but she notices him out of the corner of her eye and seems happy to see him.
* ''WesternAnimation/ThunderCats2011'': Lion-O has just found out that his crush Cheetarah prefers his older brother Tygra over him. He actually takes it amazingly well, publicly encouraging their relationship. In private, however, he calls Cheetarah out on her flirtatious methods of supporting and encouraging him, which led to the misunderstanding in the first place. He ''does'' want them both to be happy, but that doesn't necessarily mean he's happy ''about'' it.

* ''VisualNovel/KatawaShoujo'', this is the reason why [[spoiler:Misha helps Hisao get together with Shizune in the latter's route. The big twist here is that her beloved is not Hisao but [[SchoolgirlLesbians Shizune]]. Eventually, however, especially after the first time Hisao and Shizune have sex, her feelings start to come to the surface and put a strain on ''everyone's'' relationships with each other.]]

* ''WesternAnimation/StarVsTheForcesOfEvil'': Deconstructed and defied in Season 2. [[spoiler: Star has feelings for Marco, but she doesn't realize it until he's already in a relationship with Jackie-Lynn Thomas, [[MatchmakerCrush whom she was trying to set up with him]] for much of the school year. Star ''tries'' to invoke this trope, but finds that she has a hard time doing so. Her unintentional jealousy and bottling of her emotions cause her magic to go berserk in a number of episodes throughout that season.]]

* In the ''WesternAnimation/TeenTitans'' episode "Things Change", Beast Boy encounters a Schoolgirl bearing a striking resemblance to his once petrified former girlfriend Terra. Eager to resume the relationship, he is met with considerable resistance on the part of the Schoolgirl when she repeatedly explains to Beast Boy that she does not wish to be associated with Terra, or Terra's bad deeds. Ultimately, Beast Boy realizes the strain he has put The Schoolgirl through when she explains that, though he may enjoy being a Titan, ''she'' [[IJustWantToBeNormal just wants to be normal]], and he leaves the Schoolgirl to enjoy a normal life, and attend to his responsibilities.

* In ''WesternAnimation/MiraculousLadybug'' episode "The Bubbler", Marinette knits Adrien a scarf for his birthday. However, at the end of the episode, Nathalie (The personal assistant to Adrien's father) takes Marinette's name off the tag and claims it came from his father, to cover up that she neglected to get a gift in Gabriel's stead. Rather than reveal that the scarf came from her, Marinette sees how happy Adrien is thinking that the scarf was from his father and stays silent.

** Marinette initially dislikes Kagami because she and Adrien get along well, and she also has feelings for him. But later on, Marinette realises she doesn't have any other friends and befriends her, and though she's still jealous of how close Kagami is with Adrien when the three of them spend time together, she eventually decides to let them be.
** [[spoiler: However, they break up quickly. When Marinette learns this, she initially tries to get them back together. But it fails, and Kagami points that Marinette is a better match for Adrien than her.]]

* ''WesternAnimation/MyLittlePonyFriendshipIsMagic'': For the longest time, Spike has been close to Rarity; when she was attempting to win the heart of Trenderhoof, he decides to help her.

* In ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons'':

* ''WesternAnimation/StarVsTheForcesOfEvil'': Deconstructed and defied in season two. [[spoiler: Star has feelings for Marco, but she doesn't realize it until he's already in a relationship with Jackie-Lynn Thomas, [[MatchmakerCrush whom she was trying to set up with him]] for much of the school year. Star ''tries'' to invoke this trope, but finds that she has a hard time doing so. Her unintentional jealousy and bottling of her emotions cause her magic to go berserk in a number of episodes throughout that season.]]
** Played straight in season three. [[spoiler:Jackie breaks up with Marco because she knows he's unhappy with life on Earth after spending so much time on Mewni, and implicitly because she knows he'd be happier with Star. Later, when Marco realizes that he has a crush on Star, he holds off on telling her because she had already moved on by that point to start dating Tom, a friend he cares too much about to hurt.]]

* Mocked at the very end of season 4 of ''WesternAnimation/TheVentureBrothers''. When The Outrider tells Dean "you should be happy as long as she's happy", he curses him back with a PrecisionFStrike.