History Literature / LambTheGospelAccordingToBiff

* BeethovenWasAnAlienSpy: According to Raziel, the angel Gabriel once decided to hang around on Earth for sixty years under the guise of [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Miles_davis Miles Davis]].

* ArtisticLicenseHistory: Moore did some pretty serious research for the book, resulting in a fairly-accurate portrayal of life in BibleTimes. Any deviations indulged in for the sake of RuleOfCool, RuleOfPlot and RuleOfFunny are meticulously documented in the Afterword.

In between epistolary moments where he marvels about modern life, Biff pens his gospel, filling in a lot of the blanks. Ever notice how Literature/TheBible [[OffstageWaitingRoom goes straight from Jesus as a kid (about 12 years old) to the beginning of his ministry when he was 30]]? Biff explains that the two of them went east so that Josh could learn, from TheThreeWiseMen, how to become the Messiah. Along the way, they absorbed many Buddhist, Taoist and Hindu attitudes which informed Joshua's later preaching. Biff looks out for his best friend, tempering Joshua's [[VirginityMakesYouStupid innocent stupidity]] with his own brand of ruthless, practical {{Magnificent Bastard}}ry. The only thing that gets him off-balance is the presence of his childhood crush, Mary the Magdalene ("Maggie"), who is depicted as [[AllLoveIsUnrequited having a thing for Josh]]. And, because it's a humor novel, all sorts of silly things happen, be it the names of Balthazar's concubines, the explanation of how the martial art "jew-do" came about, or the start of the Jewish tradition of having Chinese food on Joshua's birthday.

** Joshua's opinion of this "sarcasm" thing Biff invented (at least at first, before Josh starts using it in ways Biff never intended, i.e., against him). Other noteworthy ones include matches and gravity.
** Likewise, Biff's name for a big barrier used to keep some barbarians out: The Ostentatious and Unpleasant Wall Of China.

* PalsWithJesus

** Also subverted as the monastery is described as incredibly cold, and generally not a nice place to live.

** Legion himselves show up, to be banished into some pigs and drowned...which causes some unpleasantness.

* VitriolicBestBuds: Josh and Biff are a mild case at best, but the shades of it get truly meaningful when the reader realizes that Biff is the ''only'' person Josh can be human with - the only one he can even lie to.

In between epistolary moments where he marvels about modern life, Biff pens his gospel, filling in a lot of the blanks. Ever notice how Literature/TheBible [[OffstageWaitingRoom goes straight from Jesus as a kid (about 12 years old) to the beginning of his ministry when he was 30]]? Biff explains that the two of them went east so that Josh could learn, from TheThreeWiseMen, how to become the Messiah. Along the way, they absorbed many Buddhist, Taoist and Hindu attitudes which informed Joshua's later preaching. Biff looks out for his best friend, tempering Joshua's [[VirginityMakesYouStupid innocent stupidity]] with his own brand of ruthless, practical {{Magnificent Bastard}}ry. The only thing that gets him off-balance is the presence of his childhood crush, Mary the Magdalene ("Maggie"), who is depicted as [[AllLoveIsUnrequited having a thing for Josh]]. And, because it's a humor novel, all sorts of silly things happen, be it the names of Balthazar's concubines, the explanation of how the martial art "judo" came about, or the start of the Jewish tradition of having Chinese food on Joshua's birthday.

* ShownTheirWork: Moore's depiction of life in Palestine is reasonably historically accurate, except that he threw out anything that wouldn't fit the RuleOfFunny.

As suggested by its title, the main character and SympatheticPOV is a fellow named "Levi bar Alphaeus who is called Biff." The reason he doesn't show up in the actual Bible is that he was [[UnsympatheticComedyProtagonist kind of a jerk]] and the other apostles [[AncientConspiracy conspired to keep him out of it]] (or so he figures). In the modern day, Biff is resurrected by an angel to give his accounts of what it was like to have known Joshua bar Joseph since both of you were six years old, and you stumbled upon him having his kid brother smash a lizard with a rock, sticking the dead lizard in his mouth, and taking it back out alive again.

* OddNameOut: All of Balthasar's concubines have long and elaborate names, often regarding their occupation (for instance, "Tiny Feet of the Divine Dance of Joyous Orgasm," who for obvious reasons just goes by "Joy")... Except for the last one: "Sue (short for Susanna)".[[spoiler:A subversion, too, since Joy, not Susannah, lives through the following disaster.]]

* ButYouScrewOneGoat: Played with, a ''lot''.
-->" A ''sea turtle?'' Really?! That's got to be an abomination."

* CuteShotaroBoy: Jesus himself. The scary thing is, in context, it actually makes a lot of sense.

* CelibateHero: Josh is commanded by an angel (Raziel) not to "know women." What exactly does ''that'' mean? They mean to ask Raziel the next time he appears...but, as a RunningGag, they never get around to it.

* BrainlessBeauty: Raziel is...dense. This leads Biff to theorize that Raziel might have been the UrExample DumbBlonde.

In between epistolary moments where he marvels about modern life, Biff pens his gospel, filling in a lot of the blanks. Ever notice how Literature/TheBible [[OffstageWaitingRoom goes straight from Jesus as a kid (about 12 years old) to the beginning of his ministry when he was 30]]? Biff explains that the two of them went east so that Josh could learn, from the Three Wise Men, how to become the Messiah. Along the way, they absorbed many Buddhist, Taoist and Hindu attitudes which informed Joshua's later preaching. Biff looks out for his best friend, tempering Joshua's [[VirginityMakesYouStupid innocent stupidity]] with his own brand of ruthless, practical {{Magnificent Bastard}}ry. The only thing that gets him off-balance is the presence of his childhood crush, Mary the Magdalene ("Maggie"), who is depicted as [[AllLoveIsUnrequited having a thing for Josh]]. And, because it's a humor novel, all sorts of silly things happen, be it the names of Balthazar's concubines, the explanation of how the martial art "judo" came about, or the start of the Jewish tradition of having Chinese food on Joshua's birthday.

An AffectionateParody of TheBible by absurdist & humorist ChristopherMoore.

In between epistolary moments where he marvels about modern life, Biff pens his gospel, filling in a lot of the blanks. Ever notice how TheBible [[OffstageWaitingRoom goes straight from Jesus as a kid (about 12 years old) to the beginning of his ministry when he was 30]]? Biff explains that the two of them went east so that Josh could learn, from the Three Wise Men, how to become the Messiah. Along the way, they absorbed many Buddhist, Taoist and Hindu attitudes which informed Joshua's later preaching. Biff looks out for his best friend, tempering Joshua's [[VirginityMakesYouStupid innocent stupidity]] with his own brand of ruthless, practical {{Magnificent Bastard}}ry. The only thing that gets him off-balance is the presence of his childhood crush, Mary the Magdalene ("Maggie"), who is depicted as [[AllLoveIsUnrequited having a thing for Josh]]. And, because it's a humor novel, all sorts of silly things happen, be it the names of Balthazar's concubines, the explanation of how the martial art "judo" came about, or the start of the Jewish tradition of having Chinese food on Joshua's birthday.

* BishieSparkle:

'''Biff''': You're sure it's not stupidity leaking out of you?
* {{Bishonen}}: Raziel, the angel who resurrects Biff. Supposedly EvenTheGuysWantHim is a standard feature on angels.

* CameBackWrong: Lazarus, who has, err, somewhat fragmented in the meanwhile. (This is a ShoutOut to TheBible: Maggie protests that they should not open the tomb because Lazarus has been dead for four days and the stench will be dreadful.)

* CloudCuckooLander:

** Catch is the main villain in Christopher Moore's first book, ''Practical Demon Keeping'', in which a man summons the demon and then can't figure out how to get rid of him. There's even a mention that the demon said he'd been to Earth before, but refused to say how he'd been banished.

* DeconstructorFleet on TheBible (played more for laughs than anything else)

* ItWillNeverCatchOn:

* JerkWithAHeartOfGold: Biff.

* LoveTriangle: Biff [=--->=] Maggie [=--->=] Josh

* NamesTheSame:

* StupidSexyFlanders:
** Biff, tackling Raziel, shouting, "''I have not been laid in two thousand years!!!''"

* TheLegionsOfHell:

* WalkOnWater:
** Another good example of how Moore both pokes fun at TheBible and plays it straight. Peter takes one step and goes straight in. Josh teases him for being dumb as a rock, but also praises him for the strength of his faith, claiming, "On this rock..."

** Biff, tackling Raziel, shouting, "''I have not been laid in two thousand years!!!''" There's also that time that Biff asked to see Raziel's, err, equipment...
* TheLegionsOfHell: Legion himselves show up, to be banished into some pigs and drowned. (which causes some unpleasantness) There is also the demon Catch.

* UncannyFamilyResemblance / FamousAncestor: There's a slight implication that the Emperor of San Francisco from ''Literature/BloodsuckingFiends'' and ''Literature/ADirtyJob'' might be Bartholomew's descendant, considering both are huge, bearded homeless men accompanied by dogs and completely happy with the way they live, not to mention, well... [[CrazyHomelessPeople they seem crazy]] (or [[TheCuckoolanderWasRight do they?]]). Or maybe Bart is just an Expy...

* WalkOnWater: Another good example of how Moore both pokes fun at TheBible and plays it straight. Peter takes one step and goes straight in. Josh teases him for being dumb as a rock, but also praises him for the strength of his faith, claiming, "On this rock..."

* {{Adorkable}}: Jesus comes off as a bit of this. He literally cannot help himself from poking anyone who calls himself an Untouchable, and finds it hilarious every single time.

* LoveTriangle

* ContinuityNod: Catch is the main villain in Christopher Moore's first book, ''Practical Demon Keeping'', in which a man summons the demon and then can't figure out how to get rid of him. There's even a mention that the demon said he'd been to Earth before, but refused to say how he'd been banished. Raziel is later an important character in ''Literature/TheStupidestAngel''

* BrainlessBeauty - Raziel is...dense. This leads Biff to theorize that Raziel might have been the UrExample DumbBlonde.

* Adorkable: Jesus comes off as a bit of this. He literally cannot help himself from poking anyone who calls himself an Untouchable, and finds it hilarious every single time.

* HoYay: A certain amount between HeterosexualLifePartners Josh and Biff. (Not to mention [[StupidSexyFlanders Stupid Sexy Raziel]]...)

** There's also that bit where John the Apostle makes a rather flirty comment in regards to Josh. He spends the rest of the scene [[HaveIMentionedIAmHeterosexualToday loudly proclaiming his interest in random women]] before his brother James tells him to stop embarrassing himself.

-->" A ''sea turtle?'' Really?!"

* ContinuityNod: Raziel is later an important character in ''Literature/TheStupidestAngel'', and Catch is the main villain in Christopher Moore's first book, ''Practical Demon Keeping''.

** Also subverted as the monastery is desribed as incredibly cold, and generally not a nice place to live.

* TheLegionsOfHell: Catch, anyone? And then Legion himselves show up later.
* UncannyFamilyResemblance / FamousAncestor: There's a slight implication that the Emperor of San Francisco from ''Literature/BloodsuckingFiends'' and ''Literature/ADirtyJob'' might be Bartholomew's descendant, considering both are huge, bearded homeless man accompanied by dogs and completely happy with the way they live, not to mention, well... [[CrazyHomelessPeople they seem crazy]] (or [[TheCuckoolanderWasRight do they?]]). Or maybe Bart is just an Expy...