History Funny / TheLooneyTunesShow

-->You'll have to pardon my friend. The heat's getting to him. He's not used to this. He's not a hardened criminal like you... I mean, I shouldn't assume that you're a hardened criminal, but -- in my defense, you ''do'' have a Neanderthal-shaped head, which I normally equate with stupidity -- oh, not that you're stupid, I-I just mean that you ''look'' stupid! ...I don't mean that as an insult! I mean, some people think "stupid" to mean "cool," like "That's a stupid car," "You've got a stupid apartment" -- I wish I could stop talking! I'm just very nervous right now, I tend to ramble when I'm nervous -- you know what the word "ramble" means? You're probably too stupid to know... and here, I mean stupid-''stupid'', not stupid-''cool''!

--> '''Daffy:''' Someday this country will ''send a man to the moon!''
--> '''Bugs:''' [[UsefulNotes/TheSpaceRace That already happened.]]
--> '''Daffy''' ''(gazing at his own hands in awe):'' Am I... a ''wizard?''

-->'''Daffy:''' You mean you can get ''paid'' to make peoples' lives miserable? I've been doing it all this time for free!

-->'''Daffy:''' [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KMuQo51VwmM HEY GOOD LOOKIN', WHAT'S--COOKIN'? 'CAUSE IT SMELLS LIKE YOU'RE STIRRIN' UP SOME--LOVE STEW! YOU KNOW WHAT I THINK YOU SHOULD DO?--I'LL TELL YOU RIGHT AFTER THE BOAT--TURNS AROUND--I THINK YOU SHOULD GIVE ME--A GREAT BIG--GLASS OF GINGER ALE BECAUSE I'M--GETTING SICK FROM GOING BACK--AND FORTH--BLAUGH!--WAUGH!--BLAUGH!]] ''Urghhhh...''

* Generally, WesternAnimation/DaffyDuck's complete ineptitude in paying attention to what he's talking about results in some very hilarious moments. There's his DiggingYourselfDeeper moments, his off-tangent description of a "cheer-leader cleaning lady", and the "tomato-tomAto" conversation in "Casa de Calma", to name a few.

* "The Reunion" has quite a few:
** '''SEE WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU PEOPLE DON'T LET ME READ YOUR MAIL!?!'''

* The ''We Are in Love'' music video, especially when Bugs does things like knock Lola off his car with the windscreen wipers.
-->'''Bugs''': I won't lie, you're a very pretty lady...but you're [[StalkerWithACrush crazy]] [[CloudCuckoolander crazy]] [[{{Yandere}} crazy]], you make me wanna [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere move to Bolivia]]...
* TheStinger in "Peel of Fortune", in which [[spoiler:Daffy goes back in time to throw toilet paper at some cavemen]].

-->*disturbed* "Daffy. [[{{Squick}} Are you tellin' me that you don't use toilet paper]]?"
-->*Daffy closes the garage door on him*
-->*from inside garage* "Mine was gonna be called butt paper!"

-->'''Daffy:''' "Don't try to use that money; you could get arrested."

** Daffy goes up to the other nerds, Marvin and Pete, who are happy to sit with him. In reality where Daffy was the nerd, he asks if the seat is taken...[[EvenNerdsHaveStandards only to just walk away from the table without a word.]]

* Henry keeps telling Porky that he wants some chicken to eat, but Porky explains to him at one point that chicken is just a metaphor for wanting more guidance. Henry's reaction is PRICELESS.
* Henry's complete and utter bewilderment when Porky excitedly gushes over literally watching paint dry
--> '''Henry:''' We're watching paint dry?! That's the most boring thing in the world! That's why there's an expression "watching paint dry"! We're literally doing the expression!
* When Henry literally bites Foghorn in the butt because he's a chicken. Everyone's faces are just so shocked, it's pretty hilarious. Also with Bugs' 'I'm so done with this' face afterwords adds onto it.

--->'''Granny:''' We're going to clean out my attic.
--->'''Daffy:''' Clean out your attic? What's romantic about that?
--->'''Granny:''' I'm a 90 year old woman. Get your mind out of the gutter.
* "I hate to tell you, lady, but you're still a WAAC".

--->'''Lola (w/ disturbed smile):''' "Not every girl is as stable as me." (slowly crushes soda can against her forehead without changing expression or flinching).

-->'''Lola:''' "I'll just leave this ladder here. For later."

-->'''Lola:''' "That time I actually did hit an oil truck. ...Gotta go, byeeeee! ''(explosion over the phone)''"

-->''*types up the name, the scoreboard, limited to three-letter names, lists Player 1 as "THE"*''

-->''*types up the name, and the scoreboard lists Player 2 as "THE"*''

'''Marvin:''' The Marvinator?!\\

-->''*types up the name, and the scoreboard lists Player 3 as, what else, "THE"*''

-->''*types up the name, and the scoreboard lists Player 4 as "POO"*''
-->''*{{beat}}*''

* "That is a GARBAGE move! Porky is a PIECE of GARBAGE!"

* Daffy took his role as commander-in-chief of pizza operations seriously. To put things in perspective, he delivered pizzas [[CrazyAwesome WITH A TANK]].

--> '''Dr Weisberg:''' You've got one friend who nearly gets you killed in a fire and another friend who hits you with his car. You've gotta get some new friends!

'''Speedy:''' Señor Bunny?

--> '''Daffy:''' Where's the body? I'll help you bury it.

--> '''Bugs:''' Okay. You're a [[ItsAllAboutMe narcissist]], you're a [[TheSociopath sociopath]], you're ''probably'' a psychopath, you're a- ''[[CurseCutShort (elevator door closes;]]'' ''door reopens in the mall garage)'' ...you're [[TheParanoiac paranoid]], [[StrawMisogynist sexist]], and you [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking make fun of the elderly]].

'''Daffy:''' Well, I hope you have better luck with that than I did.

---> '''Pete:''' I'm still waiting to graduate.

--> '''Daffy:''' School is a lot like prison. I should know, [[CallBack I've been to both]].
* Daffy trying to get Gossamer to flee the country as beloved baseball player Fernando Valenzuela. ...along with "his fake phone number, in case of an emergency."

--->'''Gossamer:''' *playing football by himself* Go open! Go long! *throws football* Interception! *runs back* Touchdown! We did it! Yaaaay!
--->'''Daffy:''' *looking out the window while playing cards* Pathetic. Playing all by yourself. Get some friends, kid! *puts down all his chips* I'm all in. *camera pans out to the table; Daffy scoots over to the other side where there is no one there* Fold. Hmph! *pushes table over* I'm never playing with you again!

'''Daffy:''' I said hold on, The Porkinator. And finally, since ''I'' am the team captain, my nickname will be... ''The Grand Poobah!'' -- Wait! Make that -- ''Poohah the Grand!''

-->'''Lola:''' "That time I actually did hit an oil truck. Gotta go!"

--> '''Daffy:''' No! '''More''' illegally! [[CowboyCop Like you don't have time for the rules!]]

* Daffy took his role as general in charge of pizza seriously. To put things in perspective, he delivered pizzas [[CrazyAwesome WITH A TANK]].

* As Bugs and Daffy are leaving the office building via elevator
--> '''Daffy:''' Why didn't you tell me I have a bump on my beak?
--> '''Bugs:''' I never noticed a bump.
--> '''Daffy:''' Do not patronize me. If there's something wrong with me, then you owe it to me, as my best friend, to tell me.
--> '''Bugs:''' [[TheReasonYouSuckSpeech All right. You're narcissist. You're a sociopath. You're probably a psychopath.]] You're a...(elevator door closes, reopens on the bottom floor)...You're paranoid, sexist, and you make fun of the elderly.
--> '''Daffy:''' Those are just quirks! Endearing quirks!

''[Porky smiles nervously]''

-->'''Lead FBI Agent:''' That's not illegal. It's pathetic. But it’s not illegal.

--> '''Lead FBI Agent: That’s not illegal. It’s pathetic. But it’s not illegal.

--> '''Policeman:''' Impersonating a chauffeur isn't illegal. ''Pathetic,'' but not illegal.

* The RunningGag after the yacht drifts from the dock about how Daffy spent more money on luxury on necessities. Instead of a sail, he bought a jacuzzi. And instead of a radio to contact the coast guard, he bought...[[ViolationOfCommonSense a second jacuzzi]].