History Funny / Stardust

-->'''Yvaine:''' Yeah, this is where it fell. It is. Or if you want to be really specific, up there is where this weird bloody necklace came out of nowhere and knocked it out of the heavens when it was minding its own business. And over ''there'' is where it landed. And right here, this is where it got hit by a ''magical, flying '''moron!'''''

-->'''Yvaine:''' [[SarcasmMode But of course!]] Nothing says "romance" like the gift of a kidnapped injured woman! I'm not going anywhere with you!

** Alongside Bernard, Lamia also turns Billy, Bernard's goat, into a human. Thing is, Billy doesn't have a human brain, so he continues to act like a goat, from leaping over furniture rather than taking a longer route around it, to eating inedible materials that a human shouldn't consume, much to [[FacePalm Lamia's exasperation]] while she's trying to lure Yvaine into her trap.

* At the wedding/coronation at the end, Captain Shakespeare gives a glance and knowing wink to Humphrey, who returns a faint smile and a possible return wink, meaning he's either [[BiTheWay bisexual]], he's a crossdresser, he's gay and Victoria's TheBeard, or he's [[NotSoAboveItAll just rolling with the weirdness]], much to Victoria's dismay. After this, we also see a priceless reaction shot of Victoria [[SilentSnarker rolling her eyes at Tristan and Yvaine's kiss, as if to say "Whatever!"]]

** Alongside Bernard, Lamia also turns Billy, Bernard's goat, into a human. Despite this, Billy continues to act like a goat, leaping over furniture rather than taking a longer route around it and eating strange inedible materials, much to [[FacePalm Lamia's exasperation]] while she's trying to lure Yvaine into her trap.

** All the reaction shots in the film are absolutely perfect.

* Tristan is turned into a mouse by Ditchwater Sal. Then there's Yvaine's reaction: she first tries to punch and kick Sal, only to be foiled by a spell Lamia had put on Sal a few days earlier to keep Sal from seeing or touching the star. Upon realizing she's virtually invisible to Sal, during the ride, Yvaine says:

-->'''Yvaine:''' [laughs bitterly] You're funny.
-->'''Tristan:''' No, really. We're in a crater, this must be where it fell.

-->''[Tristan makes the most priceless face at realizing ''this'' is the fallen star]''

-->'''Tristan:''' For this. ''[[Tristan takes out the enchanted chain and ties it around Yvaine's wrist]'' Now, if I'm not mistaken this means you have to come with me. You're going to be a birthday gift for Victoria, my true love.

** And followed by a moment that mixes funny ''and'' heartwarming.

-->'''Young Dunstan Thorn:''' [[[BluntYes Yes.]] Because, let's be honest, it's a field. Look, do you see another world out there? No, you see a field. Do you see anything non-human? No. And you know why? Because it's a field!

* Yvaine's DeadpanSnarker tendencies.
--> '''Tristan:''' You will be a present for my Victoria!
--> '''Yvaine:''' [[SarcasmMode But of course! Nothing says 'romance' like the gift of a kidnapped, injured woman!]] I'm not going anywhere with you!
** And when they first meet, Yvaine's very matter-of-fact way of telling Tristan that ''she's'' the fallen star:
-->'''Tristan:''' [''looking round the crater''] This must be where it fell!

* Every time the ghosts of the dead princes appear onscreen. For instance, after Secundus dies, his ghost encounters the ghosts of Sextus, Quartus and Quintus. Their bickering is over-the-top hilarious. Or Tertius's ghost seeing that Tristan is in love with Yvaine and telling the others, "Come and see this!" and the other ghosts calling him a pervert.
* The trading scene where Captain Shakespeare is fencing lightning bolts through Ferdy. Shakespeare wants to sell for a very firm price, but Ferdy refuses to budge:

* As his father lays on his death bed, he tells [[PrinceCharming Secundus]] to look out the window and tell him what he sees. While dimbulb Secundus guesses, "My kingdom?" hopefully, and the triumphant musical score leads you to think he's about to be declared the heir...the king subtly encourages Septimus to [[DestinationDefenestration push him to his death]]. As Secundus falls, [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uopoXtR0Kjk the king begins laughing uproariously as the camera pans up to Secundus's ghost joining the ghosts of the other dead brothers.]]

* [[PrinceCharming Secundus]] marches into his dying father's throne room, and seems set to become the next King, as the triumphant musical score would lead you to think...until Septimus is encouraged by their father to [[DestinationDefenestration push him to his death]]. As Secundus falls, [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uopoXtR0Kjk the king begins laughing uproariously as the camera pans up to Secundus's ghost joining the ghosts of the other dead brothers.]]

* PrinceCharming Secundus (Creator/RupertEverett) marches into his dying father's throne room, and seems set to become the next King... until Septimus pulls a DestinationDefenestration on him, encouraging by his father, who laughs uproariously.

* The whole pirate fight with Septimus, when he barges in on Captain Shakespeare [[https://24.media.tumblr.com/3c311154685855e1d6ababa1d5574ae3/tumblr_ms67jv0S2f1st2uopo5_500.gif dancing]] in [[https://31.media.tumblr.com/50741a8453694a1fb3cce4761cc259cd/tumblr_ms67jv0S2f1st2uopo6_500.gif drag]] to "Music/TheCancanSong" (complete with a flat "[[https://24.media.tumblr.com/23b14cda130860f28cc02d73ad9c346e/tumblr_ms67jv0S2f1st2uopo9_500.gif What the]] [[https://24.media.tumblr.com/622ad3e722f3f295d900a930af76bf4a/tumblr_mjasvvHxWB1s2cdnto3_250.gif hell is this]]?" reaction), and said music continues through the upstairs fight as the background soundtrack, [[MickeyMousing with swords clashing in time to the music]].
** Though the actually fighting between Shakespeare's pirate crew and Septimus' men is also a moment of awesome for the crew.

'''Septimus:''' ''[to Primus]'' [[YouExclamation You!]] ''[Septimus clutches his throat and chokes on the poison, and collapses, seemingly dead. Primus' eyes light up in realization that he is now the future king of Stormhold. He picks up the crown reverently, accompanied by swelling music...which abruptly dies when Septimus suddenly bursts out laughing and stands up sporting a wild grin.]''\\

--> '''Yvaine:''' But of course! Nothing says 'romance' like the gift of a kidnapped, injured woman! I'm not going anywhere with you!

* Tristan's fantastic CrashIntoHello on Yvaine, and he first thinks she's his mother.
* Bernard, transformed into a woman, is seen sneaking looks at Yvaine in the bath. This is topped later, when he tries to serve poisoned wine to Tristan. Tristan asks for "her" name in the stables and "she" replies, in a very deep masculine voice, "Bernard".

* The [[spoiler:not so]] bloodthirsty pirates. They're a pretty funny bunch.

** On a similar note, after Lamia makes Ferdy only capable of squawking like a chicken, Septimus tries to interrogate him. As Septimus gets more and more enraged by what he perceives as mocking, he stabs Ferdy with the line "What a freak." He then hands the knife to one of his men and tells him to "Clean this... thoroughly." Mark Strong's delivery just sells it.

-->'''Yvaine:'''Yeah, this is where it fell. It is. Or if you want to be really specific, up there is where this weird bloody necklace came out of nowhere and knocked it out of the heavens when it was minding its own business. And over ''there'' is where it landed. And right here, this is where it got hit by a ''magical, flying '''moron!'''''

-->'''Yvaine:'''Yeah, this is where it fell. It is. Or if you want to be really specific, up there is where
this weird bloody necklace came out of nowhere and knocked it out of the heavens when it was minding its own business. And over ''there'' is where it landed. And right here, this is where it got hit by a ''magical, flying '''moron!'''''

'''Tertius:''' Hmmm. ''[He breaks the atmosphere with a laugh. He suddenly starts wheezing and collapses, dead.]''\\
'''Septimus:''' ''[to Primus]'' [[YouExclamation You!]] ''[Septimus clutches his throat and chokes on the poison, and collapses, seemingly dead. Primus' eyes light up in realization that he is now the future king of Stormhold. He picks up the crown reverently, accompanied by swelling music...which abruptly is cut off when Septimus suddenly bursts out laughing and stands up sporting a wild grin.]''\\

* Tristan's near perpetual 'What the fuck' expression, being a FishOutOfWater (to begin with). Once he gets used to it, he seems all cool and confident, rolling with the weirdness. Then, he [[spoiler: runs into his mother and finds out he's the new King of Stormhold.]] His baffled expression during [[spoiler: the coronation]] is absolutely priceless.

* The scene where the Bishop proposes a toast to Primus, Septimus and Tertius, unaware that someone has poisoned the wine:

'''Septimus:''' ''[to Primus]'' You! ''[Septimus clutches his throat and chokes on the poison, and collapses, seemingly dead. Primus' eyes light up in realization that he is now the future king of Stormhold. He picks up the crown reverently. Just as he is about to put it on his head, Septimus suddenly bursts out laughing and stands up sporting a wild grin.]''\\

'''Septimus:''' No, Primus, I think you'll find that ''you'' killed the bishop by drinking out of the wrong cup. ''[{{beat}}]'' Oh look, once you've finished wrestling with your conscience, may I suggest you return to your chamber. Leave the quest for the stone to me.
* Tristan is turned into a mouse by Ditchwater Sal. Then there's Yvaine's reaction: she first tries to punch and kick Sal, only to be foiled by a spell Lamia had put on Sal a few days earlier to keep Sal from seeing or touching the star. Upon realising she's virtually invisible to Sal, during the ride, Yvaine says, "Would I be correct in thinking that you can neither see nor hear me? Then I'd like to tell you that you smell of pee! You look like the wrong end of a dog! And I swear, if I don't get my Tristan back as he was, I'll be your personal poltergeist!"

** From the same scene, the goat-turned-man, who continues to act like a goat, leaping over furniture rather than taking a longer route around it and eating strange inedible materials, much to [[FacePalm Lamia's exasperation]] while she's trying to lure Yvaine into her trap.

* The background expression of the crewmember winding the gramophone in the middle of Tristan and Yvaine's DanceOfRomance.

** Just the way his father asks--the tone implying he is a mischievous boy suspected of some amusing prank.

* When Septimus finds Primus's dead body, we see that while Lamia has used her magic to get rid of the inn after her attempt on Yvaine's life failed, she did not bother to destroy the bathtub.

* At the wedding/coronation at the end, Captain Shakespeare gives a glance and knowing wink to Humphrey, who returns a faint smile and a possible return wink, meaning he's either [[BiTheWay bisexual]], he's gay and Victoria's TheBeard, or he's [[NotSoAboveItAll just rolling with the weirdness]], much to Victoria's dismay. After this, we also see a priceless reaction shot of Victoria [[SilentSnarker rolling her eyes at Tristan and Yvaine's kiss, as if to say "Whatever!"]]

* The background expression of the crewmember winding the gramophone in the middle of Tristan and Yvaine's DanceOfLove.

* At the wedding/coronation at the end, Captain Shakespeare gives a glance and knowing wink to Humphrey, who returns a faint smile and a possible return wink, meaning he's either [[BiTheWay bisexual]], he's gay and Victoria's TheBeard or [[NotSoAboveItAll just rolling with the weirdness]], much to Victoria's dismay. After this, we also see a priceless reaction shot of Victoria [[SilentSnarker rolling her eyes at Tristan and Yvaine's kiss, as if to say "Whatever!"]]

* Tristan is turned into a mouse by Ditchwater Sal. Then there's Yvaine's reaction: she first tries to punch and kick Sal, only to be foiled by a spell Lamia had put on Sal a few days earlier to keep Sal from seeing or touching the star. Upon realizing she's virtually invisible to Sal, during the ride, Yvaine says, "Would I be correct in thinking that you can neither see nor hear me? Then I'd like to tell you that you smell of pee! You look like the wrong end of a dog! And I swear, if I don't get my Tristan back as he was, I'll be your personal poltergeist!"

** From the same scene, the goat-turned-man, who continues to act like a goat, leaping over furniture rather than taking a longer route around it and eating strange indedible materials, much to [[FacePalm Lamia's exasperation]] while she's trying to lure Yvaine into her trap.

* At the wedding/corronation at the end, Captain Shakespeare gives a glance and knowing wink to Humphrey, who returns an uneasy shrug and smile, meaning he's either [[BiTheWay bisexual]] or [[NotSoAboveItAll just rolling with the weirdness]], much to Victoria's dismay. After this, we also see a priceless reaction shot of Victoria [[SilentSnarker rolling her eyes at Tristan and Yvaine's kiss, as if to say "Whatever!"]]

* The [[spoiler:not so]] bloodthirsty pirates. They're a pretty funny bunch.
--> '''Crew:''' ''[cheerful]'' ARGH!

--->'''Pirate:''' It's alright, captain. We've always known you was a whoopsie!

** Though the actually fighting between Shakespeare pirate crew and Septimus's men is also a moment of awesome for the crew.

** ON a similar note, after Lamia makes Ferdy only capable of squawking like a chicken, Septimus tries to interrogate him. As Septimus gets more and more enraged by what he perceives as mocking, he stabs Ferdy with the line "What a freak." He then hands the knife to one of his men and tells him to "Clean this... thoroughly." Mark Strong's delivery just sells it.

* The exasperated look on the first mate's face whenever Captain Shakespeare (or at one point, Tristan) forgets to act tough and pirate-y.

'''Septimus:''' ''[to Primus]'' You! ''[Septimus clutches his throat and chokes on the poison, and falls down. Primus' eyes light up in realization that he is now the future king of Stormhold. He picks up the crown reverently. Just as he is about to put it on his head, Septimus suddenly bursts out laughing and stands up sporting a wild grin.]''\\

'''Primus:''' ''[crestfallen:'' You killed the bishop.\\
'''Septimus:''' No, Primus, I think you'll find that ''you'' killed the bishop--by drinking out of the wrong cup! ''[{{beat}}]'' Oh look, once you've finished wrestling with your conscience, may I suggest you return to your chamber. Leave the quest for the stone to me.

* The whole pirate fight with Septimus, when he barges in on Captain Shakespeare [[https://24.media.tumblr.com/3c311154685855e1d6ababa1d5574ae3/tumblr_ms67jv0S2f1st2uopo5_500.gif dancing]] in [[https://31.media.tumblr.com/50741a8453694a1fb3cce4761cc259cd/tumblr_ms67jv0S2f1st2uopo6_500.gif drag]] to "Music/TheCancanSong" (complete with a flat "[[https://24.media.tumblr.com/23b14cda130860f28cc02d73ad9c346e/tumblr_ms67jv0S2f1st2uopo9_500.gif What the]] [[https://24.media.tumblr.com/622ad3e722f3f295d900a930af76bf4a/tumblr_mjasvvHxWB1s2cdnto3_250.gif hell is this]]?" reaction), and said music continues through the upstairs fight as the background soundtrack, with swords clashing in time to the music.

* Every time the ghosts of the dead princes appear onscreen. For instance, after Secundus dies, his ghost encounters the ghosts of Sextus, Quartus and Quintus. Their bickering is over-the-top hilarious. Or the fact that a lovemaking scene at the Slaughtered Prince is implied by Tertius's ghost telling the others, "Come and see this!" and the other ghosts calling him a pervert.

* When Septimus finds Primus's dead body, it's awfully funny to see that while Lamia has used her magic to get rid of the inn after her attempt on Yvaine's life failed, she did not bother to destroy the bathtub.
* When one of the witches animates Septimus's corpse to fight Tristain, the other six dead princes turn to look at Septimus. The look on his face is somewhere between "WTF?" and "Well don't look at ''me.''"

* The exasperated look on the first mate's face whenever Captain Shakespeare (or at one point, Tristan) forgets to act tough and pirate-y.

-->'''Bishop''': (''toasting the princes'') To the new King of Stormhold. Whichever of you fine young men it might be.
-->'''The Princes''': To the new King of Stormhold. (''They acknowledge him and drink. Seconds later, the bishop's face contorts, and he collapses, dead. They look uncomprehendingly at their cups, and then eye each other suspiciously'')
-->'''Tertius:''' Hmmm. (''He breaks the atmosphere with a laugh. He suddenly starts wheezing and collapses, dead'')
-->'''Septimus''': (''to Primus'') You! (''Septimus clutches his throat and chokes on the poison, and falls down. Primus' eyes light up in realization that he is now the future king of Stormhold. He picks up the crown reverently. Just as he is about to put it on his head, Septimus suddenly bursts out laughing and stands up sporting a wild grin'')
-->'''Septimus''': You really thought ''you'' were king!
-->'''Primus''': (''crestfallen'') You killed the bishop.
-->'''Septimus''': No, Primus, I think you'll find that ''you'' killed the bishop by drinking out of the wrong cup. (''{{Beat}}'') Oh look, once you've finished wrestling with your conscience, may I suggest you return to your chamber. Leave the quest for the stone to me.

* The [[spoiler: not so bloodthirsty]] pirates. They were a pretty funny bunch.
--> '''Crew''': (''cheerful'') ARGH!

*** And followed by a moment that mixes funny ''and'' heartwarming.
--> '''Pirate:''' It's alright, captain. We've always known you was a whoopsie!
* Septimus' response to his father's not unreasonable suspicion that he offed his missing sister Una, whom ''we'' know is Ditchwater Sal's slave and Tristan's mother: "Why would I kill my sister when these two cretins are still alive?"
** Just the way his father asks - the tone implying he is a mischievous boy suspected of some amusing prank.

* Every time the ghosts of the dead princes appear onscreen. For instance, after Secundus dies, his ghost encounters the ghosts of Sextus, Quartus and Quintus. Their bickering is over-the-top hilarious. Or the fact that a lovemaking scene at the Slaughtered Prince is implied by Tertius's ghost telling the others "Come and see this!" and the other ghost calling him a pervert.

-->'''Ferdy:''' [resignedly] Brilliant. Put it in the back.

* When one of the witches animates Septimus' corpse to fight Tristain, the other six dead princes turn to look at Septimus. The look on his face is somewhere between "WTF?" and "Well don't look at ''me.''"
* The exasperated look on the one pirate's face whenever Captain Shakespeare (or at one point, Tristan) forgets to act tough and pirate-y