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* No matter where the scene is set, no matter the situation they are in, whenever anyone brings up the subject of tortoises, someone else will ''always'' [[RunningGag mention that "there's good eating on of those."]]
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* Brutha sees the statues of the many gods worshiped in Ephebe and notes one [[LoveGoddess goddess]] is having a lot of trouble with her dress.
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* The invading general's puzzlement at Bruha bringing a dead body onto a battlefield. "It's not bring-your-own, you know."
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* The motto of the Quisition is "Cuius testiculos habes, habeas cardia et cerebellum." It's translated as "When you have their full attention in your grip, their hearts and minds will follow" though it clearly means [[GroinAttack something else]].
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** Brutha seeks out some philosophers and finds them in a drunken brawl over the discussion of a paradox. Then they claim not to believe in any gods (''thunder'') except Blind Io the Thunder God (''lightning'') and Cubal the Fire God (''gust of wind'') and [[ToiletHumor Flatulus]] the Wind God (''stray arrow'') and [[PunnyName Fedecks]] the God of Messengers (''angry look from a penguin'') and Patina the Goddess of Wisdom. They consider including Foorgol the God of Avalanches, but the decide the snowline isn't close enough.
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** Brutha seeks out some philosophers and finds them in a drunken brawl over the discussion of a paradox. Then they claim not to believe in any gods (''thunder'') except Blind Io the Thunder God (''lightning'') and Cubal the Fire God (''gust of wind'') and [[ToiletHumor Flatulus]] the Wind God (''stray arrow'') and [[PunnyName Fedecks]] the God of Messengers (''angry look from a penguin'') and Patina the Goddess of Wisdom.
** They consider including Foorgol the God of Avalanches, but the decide the snowline isn't closeenough.enough. Brutha then trolls them by asking if Ephebe is always this chilly.
** They consider including Foorgol the God of Avalanches, but the decide the snowline isn't close
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Changed line(s) 22 (click to see context) from:
** Brutha seeks out some philosophers and finds them in a drunken brawl over the discussion of a paradox. Then they claim not to believe in any gods (''thunder'') except Blind Io the Thunder God (''lightning'') and Cubal the Fire God (''gust of wind'') and Flatulus the Wind God (''stray arrow'') and Fedecks the God of Messengers (''angry look from a penguin'') and Patina the Goddess of Wisdom. They consider including Foorgol the God of Avalanches, but the decide the snowline isn't close enough.
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** Brutha seeks out some philosophers and finds them in a drunken brawl over the discussion of a paradox. Then they claim not to believe in any gods (''thunder'') except Blind Io the Thunder God (''lightning'') and Cubal the Fire God (''gust of wind'') and Flatulus [[ToiletHumor Flatulus]] the Wind God (''stray arrow'') and Fedecks [[PunnyName Fedecks]] the God of Messengers (''angry look from a penguin'') and Patina the Goddess of Wisdom. They consider including Foorgol the God of Avalanches, but the decide the snowline isn't close enough.
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* The philosophers of Ephebe.
** One runs out into the street in front of the Omnian delegates and begins scribbling on the wall of a potter's shop. This apparently happens so regularly that the potter is completely unfazed and gives the philosopher the towel that he'd left there last time.
** Brutha seeks out some philosophers and finds them in a drunken brawl over the discussion of a paradox. Then they claim not to believe in any gods (''thunder'') except Blind Io the Thunder God (''lightning'') and Cubal the Fire God (''gust of wind'') and Flatulus the Wind God (''stray arrow'') and Fedecks the God of Messengers (''angry look from a penguin'') and Patina the Goddess of Wisdom. They consider including Foorgol the God of Avalanches, but the decide the snowline isn't close enough.
** One runs out into the street in front of the Omnian delegates and begins scribbling on the wall of a potter's shop. This apparently happens so regularly that the potter is completely unfazed and gives the philosopher the towel that he'd left there last time.
** Brutha seeks out some philosophers and finds them in a drunken brawl over the discussion of a paradox. Then they claim not to believe in any gods (''thunder'') except Blind Io the Thunder God (''lightning'') and Cubal the Fire God (''gust of wind'') and Flatulus the Wind God (''stray arrow'') and Fedecks the God of Messengers (''angry look from a penguin'') and Patina the Goddess of Wisdom. They consider including Foorgol the God of Avalanches, but the decide the snowline isn't close enough.
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* Brutha marvels at how the Ephebians, who he'd been told were man-eating demons, just seem like ordinary people.
-->''A small boy regarded Brutha thoughtfully while excavating a nostril. If it was a demon in human form, it was an extremely good actor.''
-->''A small boy regarded Brutha thoughtfully while excavating a nostril. If it was a demon in human form, it was an extremely good actor.''
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* The revelation that ''all'' of the [[spoiler:anti-Omnia armada]]'s captains believe they're the one in charge, with reasons ranging from being the most recent victim of invasion to being the sort of person who believes they're in charge when not explicitly told otherwise.
* Near the end of the book, Om is [[spoiler:forcing the gods of Omnia's invaders to order them to cease their war.]] P'tang-P'tang, the newtlike god of a tiny tribe of 51 fishermen, is present mainly because a worshiper of his got dragged along in the wake of the armada by accident. He explains war like this:
* Near the end of the book, Om is [[spoiler:forcing the gods of Omnia's invaders to order them to cease their war.]] P'tang-P'tang, the newtlike god of a tiny tribe of 51 fishermen, is present mainly because a worshiper of his got dragged along in the wake of the armada by accident. He explains war like this:
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* The revelation that ''all'' of the [[spoiler:anti-Omnia armada]]'s anti-Omnia armada's captains believe they're the one in charge, with reasons ranging from being the most recent victim of invasion to being the sort of person who believes they're in charge when not explicitly told otherwise.
* Near the end of the book, Om is[[spoiler:forcing forcing the gods of Omnia's invaders to order them to cease their war.]] war. P'tang-P'tang, the newtlike god of a tiny tribe of 51 fishermen, is present mainly because a worshiper of his got dragged along in the wake of the armada by accident. He explains war like this:
* Near the end of the book, Om is
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* The footnote on how Ephebian democracy 'works'. Namely, after everyone (who is eligible to vote - i.e., being a right-thinking natural born Ephebian citizen who is not a woman, and preferably rich) votes someone in who has been rigorously determined to not be either frivolous, a liar, a criminal, a maniac, a foreigner, or the wrong sort of person, he invariably turns out to be a frivolous, lying, criminal maniac with no regard for the philosopher in the street just looking for a towel, kicked out of office... and the whole thing starts all over again. (Sadly, probably TruthInTelevision for real life democracy, in fact.)
-->''Really, it's amazing how people keep making the same mistakes.''
-->''Really, it's amazing how people keep making the same mistakes.''
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* When the skies erupt as the heavens shake from Om's violent return among the gods to stop a war on Discworld, some of the humans cower for cover under a boat, and start passing around a cigarette and a flask. Occasionally, a line slips in where [[TheGrimReaper someone]] [[AC:thanks them]]. The soldiers are weirded out but can't place why...
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* When the skies erupt as the heavens shake from Om's violent return among the gods to stop a war on Discworld, some of the humans cower for cover under a boat, and start passing around a cigarette and a flask. Occasionally, a line slips in where [[TheGrimReaper someone]] [[AC:thanks them]]. them.]] The soldiers are weirded out but can't place why...
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Death isn't "terrified." He's got nothing to be terrified of, and his only presence is casually passing the cigarette and flask around.
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* When the skies erupt as the heavens shake from Om's violent return among the gods to stop a war on Discworld, some of the humans cower for cover right next to an equally terrified Death.
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* When the skies erupt as the heavens shake from Om's violent return among the gods to stop a war on Discworld, some of the humans cower for cover right next to an equally terrified Death.under a boat, and start passing around a cigarette and a flask. Occasionally, a line slips in where [[TheGrimReaper someone]] [[AC:thanks them]]. The soldiers are weirded out but can't place why...
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* When the skies erupt as the heavens shake from Om's violent return among the gods to stop a war on Discworld, some of the human cower for cover right next to an equally terrified Death.
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* When the skies erupt as the heavens shake from Om's violent return among the gods to stop a war on Discworld, some of the human humans cower for cover right next to an equally terrified Death.
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* "Choral singing was compulsory for novitiates, but after much petitioning by Brother Preptil a special dispensation had been made for [[DreadfulMusician Brutha]]."
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* "Choral "Brother Preptil, the master of the music, had described Brutha's voice as putting him in mind of a disappointed vulture arriving too late at the dead donkey. Choral singing was compulsory for novitiates, but after much petitioning by Brother Preptil a special dispensation had been made for [[DreadfulMusician Brutha]].Brutha]]. The sight of his big round face screwed up in the effort to please was bad enough, but what was worse was listening to his voice, which was certainly powerful and full of intent conviction, swinging backward and forward across the tune without ever quite hitting it."
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* "Choral singing was compulsory for novitiates, but after much petitioning by Brother Preptil a special dispensation had been made for Brutha."
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* "Choral singing was compulsory for novitiates, but after much petitioning by Brother Preptil a special dispensation had been made for Brutha.[[DreadfulMusician Brutha]]."
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-->''VI. This Is Religion, Boy. Not Comparison Bloody Shopping! You Shall Not Subject Your God To Market Forces!''
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-->''VI. This Is Religion, Boy. Not Comparison Bloody Shopping! You Shall Not Subject Your God To Market Forces!''Forces!''
----
----
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* The revelation that ''all'' of the [[spoiler:anti-Omnia armada]]'s captains believe they're the one in charge, with reasons ranging from being the most recent victim of invasion to being the sort of person who believes they're in charge when not explicitly told otherwise.
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* The re-empowered Om busting into Dunmanifestin and, when challenged by Blind Io for his intrusion, ''head-butting the nominal chief god of Discworld in the face''.
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* The re-empowered Om busting into Dunmanifestin and, when challenged by Blind Io for his intrusion, ''head-butting the nominal chief god of Discworld in the face''.face''.
* Om's indignant reaction to Brutha promising religious toleration.
-->"Ah, but it'll work for you," said Brutha. "People will soon see that those other ones are no good at all, won't they?" He crossed his fingers behind his back.
-->''VI. This Is Religion, Boy. Not Comparison Bloody Shopping! You Shall Not Subject Your God To Market Forces!''
* Om's indignant reaction to Brutha promising religious toleration.
-->"Ah, but it'll work for you," said Brutha. "People will soon see that those other ones are no good at all, won't they?" He crossed his fingers behind his back.
-->''VI. This Is Religion, Boy. Not Comparison Bloody Shopping! You Shall Not Subject Your God To Market Forces!''
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* "Choral singing was compulsory for novitiates, but after much petitioning by Brother Preptil a special dispensation had been made for Brutha."
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* Any time Om [[CutHisHeartOutWithASpoon curses]]. In particular though:
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* Any time Om [[CutHisHeartOutWithASpoon curses]].attempts to blast someone with a mighty curse]]. In particular though:
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** Said worshiper then wonders why so many people would want to hit Pacha Moj's uncle with rocks.
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** Said Although this does leave the worshiper then wonders wondering why so many ''many'' people would want to hit Pacha Moj's uncle with big rocks.
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* The re-empowered Om busting into Dunmanifestin and, when challenged by Blind Io, ''head-butting the nominal chief god of Discworld in the face''.
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* The re-empowered Om busting into Dunmanifestin and, when challenged by Blind Io, Io for his intrusion, ''head-butting the nominal chief god of Discworld in the face''.
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** Said worshiper then wonders why so many people would want to hit Pacha Moj's uncle with rocks.
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** Said worshiper then wonders why so many people would want to hit Pacha Moj's uncle with rocks.rocks.
* The re-empowered Om busting into Dunmanifestin and, when challenged by Blind Io, ''head-butting the nominal chief god of Discworld in the face''.
* The re-empowered Om busting into Dunmanifestin and, when challenged by Blind Io, ''head-butting the nominal chief god of Discworld in the face''.
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* Any time [[DeadpanSnarker Pratchett]] brings up the value or merit of philosophers, church bureaucracy, or death traps conveniently placed in large foreboding libraries.
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* Any time [[DeadpanSnarker Pratchett]] brings up the value or merit of philosophers, church bureaucracy, or death traps conveniently placed in large foreboding libraries.libraries.
* Near the end of the book, Om is [[spoiler:forcing the gods of Omnia's invaders to order them to cease their war.]] P'tang-P'tang, the newtlike god of a tiny tribe of 51 fishermen, is present mainly because a worshiper of his got dragged along in the wake of the armada by accident. He explains war like this:
-->Remember when Pacha Moj hit his uncle with big rock? Like that, only more worse.
** Said worshiper then wonders why so many people would want to hit Pacha Moj's uncle with rocks.
* Near the end of the book, Om is [[spoiler:forcing the gods of Omnia's invaders to order them to cease their war.]] P'tang-P'tang, the newtlike god of a tiny tribe of 51 fishermen, is present mainly because a worshiper of his got dragged along in the wake of the armada by accident. He explains war like this:
-->Remember when Pacha Moj hit his uncle with big rock? Like that, only more worse.
** Said worshiper then wonders why so many people would want to hit Pacha Moj's uncle with rocks.
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* When the skies erupt as the heavens shake from Om's violent return among the gods to stop a war on Discworld, some of the human cower for cover right next to an equally terrified Death.
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* When the skies erupt as the heavens shake from Om's violent return among the gods to stop a war on Discworld, some of the human cower for cover right next to an equally terrified Death.Death.
* Any time [[DeadpanSnarker Pratchett]] brings up the value or merit of philosophers, church bureaucracy, or death traps conveniently placed in large foreboding libraries.
* Any time [[DeadpanSnarker Pratchett]] brings up the value or merit of philosophers, church bureaucracy, or death traps conveniently placed in large foreboding libraries.
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-->"Your intestines to be wrapped around a tree until you are sorry!"
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-->"Your intestines to be wrapped around a tree until you are sorry!"sorry!"
* When the skies erupt as the heavens shake from Om's violent return among the gods to stop a war on Discworld, some of the human cower for cover right next to an equally terrified Death.
* When the skies erupt as the heavens shake from Om's violent return among the gods to stop a war on Discworld, some of the human cower for cover right next to an equally terrified Death.
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Changed line(s) 3,4 (click to see context) from:
--->"Your sexual organs to sprout wings and fly away!"
--->"Your intestines to be wrapped around a tree until you are sorry!"
--->"Your intestines to be wrapped around a tree until you are sorry!"
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Curses. He\'s actually \'\'cursing\'\' them. It\'s not his fault it doesn\'t work... is there a verb for divine punishment?
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* Any time Om [[CutHisHeartOutWithASpoon swears]]. In particular though:
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* Any time Om [[CutHisHeartOutWithASpoon swears]].curses]]. In particular though:
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* Any time Om [[UnusualEuphemism swears]]. In particular though:
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* Any time Om [[UnusualEuphemism [[CutHisHeartOutWithASpoon swears]]. In particular though:
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Changed line(s) 1 (click to see context) from:
* The RunningGag of someone asking for the Deformed Rabbit shadow-puppet whenever shadow-puppets are referred to, culminating in Didactylos in ''Small Gods'' using it as the punchline in the Parable of the Cave.
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* The RunningGag of someone asking for the Deformed Rabbit shadow-puppet whenever shadow-puppets are referred to, culminating to culminates in Didactylos in ''Small Gods'' using it as the punchline in to his version of the Parable of the Cave.
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--->"Your sexual organs to sprout wings and fly away!" and
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--->"Your sexual organs to sprout wings and fly away!" andaway!"
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from Funny.Discworld
Changed line(s) 1 (click to see context) from:
Any time Om [[UnusualEuphemism swears.]] In particular though:
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* The RunningGag of someone asking for the Deformed Rabbit shadow-puppet whenever shadow-puppets are referred to, culminating in Didactylos in ''Small Gods'' using it as the punchline in the Parable of the Cave.
* Any time Om [[UnusualEuphemismswears.]] swears]]. In particular though: though:
* Any time Om [[UnusualEuphemism
