History Funny / AssassinsCreedBrotherHood

--> '''Guard, in a very coy tone of voice and backing off''': Nice ''assassino''... Put it down, yes? (this incidentally migrated from AC2 here, probably because it was so hilarious)

** And the fact that many players are hung up over losing the Armor of Altaïr. It was a damn fine armor.

** Oddly enough, if you later complete the "Templar Agent" mission to kill Gaspar de la Croix (aka the Engineer multiplayer character), Ezio does do the "close eyes" motion with him despite de la Croix wearing glasses.

** Pretty much anything with Shaun and Rebecca.

* When you get back from killing the Banker, and approach the Rosa in Fiore, you receive the next mission, stating that there's trouble inside. There are a bunch of crying courtesans outside, saying that the guards followed the one who took a money chest back. Ezio/the player enter the building, expecting a PlayerPunch since Ezio's mother and sister are inside... [[spoiler: only to find a bunch of dead guards, surrounding a knife-wielding Claudia.]]

* After the second infiltration of the Castel Sant'Angelo, the next time that Ezio visits Leonardo, he will ask if Ezio is the one behind [[spoiler:Rodrigo Borgia]]'s demise and Ezio denies it. Then, [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nuI8DdJgYLY&hd=1&t=0m24s this]] comes up:

** Cristina's expression as she watched Ezio trip over his words during his attempted wooing is equally hilarious. Also, following Cristina's rejection, Ezio hilariously honest reply:

** Likely because [[spoiler: Caterina]] had ''just'' admitted to Ezio that the only reason she slept with him the night before the Siege of Monteriggioni was to [[IDidWhatIHadToDo ''really'' make sure]] that he'd lend her some of his mercenaries in [[TheWomanWearingTheQueenlyMask defending Forlì against the Borgia]]. Sure, he'd answered, "Politics, I understand. You not need explain," but...

* This little gem when frerunning:

*** More humorously, it could be interpreted that Ezio's ''finally'' figured out what Leonardo meant about "women providing little distraction," ''three years later''.
* The first doctor Ezio sees informs him that someone his age could not recover normally from his wounds. Ezio leaves politely enough, but when he gets out of earshot...

** And the fact that many players are hung up over losing the Armor of Altaïr. [[TearJerker It was a damn fine armor though.]]

*** This particular exchange arguably morphs into HarsherInHindsight following the "Brexit" vote (particularly as Shaun's voice actor Danny Wallace favoured the "Remain" side).

--> '''Guard, in a very coy tone of voice and backing off''': Nice ''assassino''... Put it down, yes?

** And the fact that many players are hung up over losing the Armor of Altaïr.

-->'''Lucy''': If I pulled ''all'' the levers, what would be left for you to do?
-->'''Desmond''': (''shrugs'')...Nothing?
-->'''Lucy''': Nice try.

-->'''Shaun''': The apprentice even got to keep the Mona Lisa. Either this was true love, or Salaì had one hell of a sugar daddy[[note]]which ''is'' played up during the Da Vinci Disappearance DLC[[/note]].

* [[ImprovisedWeapon Killing a guard with a broom]]: Funny. Seeing a broom impacting with the same force and sound as a mace? ''Hilarious''. Killing a guard with a broom and getting the achievement "Spring Cleaning"? ''Minutes'' of nonstop laughter.

* [[ImprovisedWeapon Killing a guard with a broom]]: Funny. Seeing a broom impacting with the same force and sound as a mace? ''Hilarious''. Killing a guard with a broom and [[TheDevTeamThinksOfEverything getting the achievement "Spring Cleaning"?]] ''Minutes'' of nonstop laughter.

** And the fact that many players are hung up over losing the Armor of Altair.

* In a later Christina memory, Ezio saves her fiancé from some loan sharks he owes money to for gambling, and then holds him off the bridge and threatens to hunt him down and kill him if he's not a good husband. He then walks back, pulls Christina out of his view, gives a ''very'' long kiss to her, and departs thusly:

'''Christina''': Wh-what?

** Bonus points for all his bombastic ranting about how he's survived Assassin attacks hundreds of times, and how he'll protect the men under his command… and as soon as you or the recruits are detected, he [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere runs for]] [[MilesGloriousis the hills.]]

* Examining Altair's statue in the present for the first time leads to this exchange.

** Which doubles as a BrickJoke, albeit a subtle one - near the beginning of the game, the technician operating the Animus briefly mentions that the translating software they're using has a tendency to glitch when trying to deal with German or French.

* Overheard from a townsperson after a successful battle with guards: "This is our just reward - entrusting our security to incompetent guards!"

-->'''Shaun''': The apprentice even got to keep the Mona Lisa. Either this was true love, or Salaì had one hell of a sugar daddy.

* Early in the DLC, Leonardo da Vinci's artistic apprentice Gian Giacomo Caprotti, aka Salaì, asks Ezio if he was one of [[spoiler: the new Pope]]'s monks, to which Ezio answered, "My church is not of God." Salaì's response: "Outside of the church of God is the realm of men. You worship there, ''messere''?" Later on, Salaì complains about Leonardo penny-pinching:

-->'''Ezio:''' He actually gives you coins?

*** More humorously, it could be interpreted that Ezio's finally figured out what Leonardo meant about "women providing little distraction," ''three years later''.

* One of the captains in charge of a Borgia-controlled guard tower can be found giving advice to his men from horseback, explaining to them that they may be under attack from assassins and gives them somewhat helpful hints about how to fight them. One of those tips is that they rarely go for a full-out frontal attack. Sending in yourself and all of your recruited assassins at that moment certainly qualifies. Especially if one of the signaled assassins rides in on a horse of their own from out of nowhere to kill him.

* Overheard from a towns person after a successful battle with guards: "This is our just reward - entrusting our security to incompetent guards!"

--->'''Bartolomeo''': You steal a man's wife and hide inside a fortress?! Nothing hangs between your thighs! In fact, there is a hole there so deep it reaches into the maledetto inferno! [[note]]Fucking underworld![[/note]]

-->'''Shaun''': "What about those other seven children?" you may ask. Find out next week, on Romance Gone Wrong.