Follow TV Tropes

Following

History Blog / WhatIf

Go To

OR

Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None

Added DiffLines:

** In [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/1/ "Relativistic Baseball"]], after discussing how throwing a lightspeed baseball would cause a thermonuclear explosion killing everyone for miles around, Munroe quotes the rules of the game
--->A careful reading of official Major League Baseball Rule 6.08(b) suggests that in this situation, the batter would be considered "hit by pitch", and would be eligible to advance to first base.

Added: 364

Removed: 364

Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
how the heck did I mess up the alphabetization that badly?


* TwoKeyedLock: Parodied in "[[https://what-if.xkcd.com/104/ Global Snow]]" with the idea that the National Weather Service's snow depth-measuring board is important enough to be double-locked.
-->'''Scientist 1:''' It's snowing. We'd better go get the board.\\
'''Scientist 2:''' OK. You'll need to come along since we need two people to turn the keys to access it.



* TwoKeyedLock: Parodied in "[[https://what-if.xkcd.com/104/ Global Snow]]" with the idea that the National Weather Service's snow depth-measuring board is important enough to be double-locked.
-->'''Scientist 1:''' It's snowing. We'd better go get the board.\\
'''Scientist 2:''' OK. You'll need to come along since we need two people to turn the keys to access it.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
crosswick

Added DiffLines:

* TwoKeyedLock: Parodied in "[[https://what-if.xkcd.com/104/ Global Snow]]" with the idea that the National Weather Service's snow depth-measuring board is important enough to be double-locked.
-->'''Scientist 1:''' It's snowing. We'd better go get the board.\\
'''Scientist 2:''' OK. You'll need to come along since we need two people to turn the keys to access it.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
typo


** In [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/160/ "Transatlantic Car Rental", the reader asks what would happen if they built a bridge of rental cars across the Atlantic. Randall replies:

to:

** In [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/160/ "Transatlantic Car Rental", Rental"]], the reader asks what would happen if they built a bridge of rental cars across the Atlantic. Randall replies:

Added: 548

Changed: 663

Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


* BadNewsIrrelevantNews: In [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/121/ "Frozen Rivers"]]:
-->This is another question that turns out even worse than I expected.
-->''Image of Randall sitting at his computer desk with questioneer Zoe Cutler behind him''
-->'''Zoe''': Is there ''any'' upside?
-->'''Randall''': I would have an excuse to quote Creator/ArnoldSchwarzenegger's [[Franchise/{{Batman}} Mr. Freeze]] from ''Film/BatmanAndRobin'' constantly!
-->'''Zoe''': Oh no.

to:

* BadNewsIrrelevantNews: BadNewsIrrelevantNews:
**
In [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/121/ "Frozen Rivers"]]:
-->This --->This is another question that turns out even worse than I expected.
-->''Image
expected.\\
''Image
of Randall sitting at his computer desk with questioneer questioner Zoe Cutler behind him''
-->'''Zoe''':
him''\\
'''Zoe''':
Is there ''any'' upside?
-->'''Randall''':
upside?\\
'''Randall''':
I would have an excuse to quote Creator/ArnoldSchwarzenegger's [[Franchise/{{Batman}} Mr. Freeze]] from ''Film/BatmanAndRobin'' constantly!
-->'''Zoe''':
constantly!\\
'''Zoe''':
Oh no.no.
** In [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/160/ "Transatlantic Car Rental", the reader asks what would happen if they built a bridge of rental cars across the Atlantic. Randall replies:
--->After extensive research, I can conclusively state that this would be a violation of your rental car agreement.\\
\\
[[ApocalypseHow Also, you would disrupt ocean circulation in the North Atlantic, potentially seriously altering the climate in the northern hemisphere.]] That's very bad, although not necessarily a violation of your rental car agreement.

Changed: 1

Removed: 159

Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
Elon Musk isn't Russian???


"...which is just a wordy version of the old saying "It's not the fall that kills you, it's the sudden stop at the end."

to:

"......which is just a wordy version of the old saying "It's not the fall that kills you, it's the sudden stop at the end."



** When a hypothetical scenario that would require a lot of reckless spending to finance comes up, Randall mentions that Elon Musk would be the one to fund it.

Added: 1110

Changed: 268

Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


* NonIndicativeName: In-universe, in the AltText for one of the images on [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/160/ "Transatlantic Car Rental"]], Randall thought NATO is an organization formed to defeat the North Atlantic.



--> ''It is, of course, obvious that speed, or height of fall, is not in itself injurious ... but a high rate of change of velocity, such as occurs after a 10 story fall onto concrete, is another matter.''

--> "...which is just a wordy version of the old saying "It's not the fall that kills you, it's the sudden stop at the end."

to:

--> ''It -->''It is, of course, obvious that speed, or height of fall, is not in itself injurious ... but a high rate of change of velocity, such as occurs after a 10 story fall onto concrete, is another matter.''

-->
''\\
\\
"...which is just a wordy version of the old saying "It's not the fall that kills you, it's the sudden stop at the end."
"



* ParallelParking: Parodied; in [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/160/ "Transatlantic Car Rental"]], an image of hundreds of cars stacked on top of each other while sinking into the ocean is given the AltText of "Parallel parking".



* SkewedPriorities: In [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/111/ "All the Money"]]: "There are ways to avoid this. You could, say, build a wall around the coins to contain them. Unfortunately, then you might face a problem worse than death: [[NoOshaCompliance building code violations.]]

to:

* SkewedPriorities: SkewedPriorities:
**
In [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/111/ "All the Money"]]: "There are ways to avoid this. You could, say, build a wall around the coins to contain them. Unfortunately, then you might face a problem worse than death: [[NoOshaCompliance building code violations.]]]]
** In [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/160/ "Transatlantic Car Rental"]] (where an audience asks Randall how many rental cars would it take to build a land bridge across the Atlantic), Randall opens by stating that doing so would be a violation of the car rental's agreement. Also, the ocean currents will be disrupted, causing severe climate change, although that is not necessary a violation of the rental's agreement.

Added: 1082

Changed: 31

Removed: 366

Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


* NoKillLikeOverkill: In [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/141/ "Sunbeam"]]:
--> "If you were standing in the path of the (laser with a diameter of 1m that contains all of the sun's output of visible light), you would obviously die pretty quickly. You wouldn't really die ''of'' anything, in the traditional sense. You would just stop being biology and start being physics.



* ThereIsNoKillLikeOverkill: "What if we tried more power?"

to:

* ThereIsNoKillLikeOverkill: ThereIsNoKillLikeOverkill:
**
"What if we tried more power?"power/higher/faster?" is Randall's go-to answer whenever overkill is ''not'' achieved. In the ''Diamond'' scenario, it ends with the meteor being fired with the speed of the [[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oh-My-God_particle Oh-My-God Particle]] (that is, very, very close to the speed of light) and the resulting impact [[EarthShatteringKaboom destroys the Earth]].
** In [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/141/ "Sunbeam"]], the entirety of the Sun's power is collected, then fired at earth in the form of a 1m-wide beam. How destructive is such a beam? Well, in Randall's words:
--> "If you were standing in the path of the beam, you would obviously die pretty quickly. You wouldn't really die ''of'' anything, in the traditional sense. You would just stop being biology and start being physics.
** In ''Proton Earth, Electron Moon'', Randall warns beforehands that this scenario is the most destructive yet, even compared to the former Earth-Shattering or Earth-Scorching ones. Indeed, it ends with [[ApocalypseHow/ClassX4 the destruction of the entire Universe]].
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None

Added DiffLines:

* CurrencyConspiracy: In "[[https://what-if.xkcd.com/111/ All the Money]]", it's implied that all US currency is all under the control of an EldritchAbomination that resembles the EyeOfProvidence, this being the reason why the symbol is on the $1 bill.

Changed: 86

Removed: 388

Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
Up To Eleven is a defunct trope


* Fiction500: [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/111/ "All The Money"]] takes this UpToEleven by imagining a scenario where you had all the money in the world.

to:

* Fiction500: [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/111/ "All The Money"]] takes this UpToEleven by imagining imagines a scenario where you had all the money in the world.



** "[[http://what-if.xkcd.com/57/ Dropping a Mountain]]" shows why this doesn't work in real life. After a series of {{Up To Eleven}}s where Mount [=McKinley=] is lifted and dropped from increasing heights, it is taken to the edge of Earth's gravitational well, the highest point an object could fall from, and hits Alaska at 10 km/s. The Black Hat Guy asks to drop it from even higher, which fails because Earth no longer has enough gravitational force to overcome that of other bodies in the solar system. Randall even hangs a lampshade on it.

to:

** "[[http://what-if.xkcd.com/57/ Dropping a Mountain]]" shows why this doesn't work in real life. After a series of {{Up To Eleven}}s where When Mount [=McKinley=] is lifted and dropped from increasing heights, it is taken to the edge of Earth's gravitational well, the highest point an object could fall from, and hits Alaska at 10 km/s. The Black Hat Guy asks to drop it from even higher, which fails because Earth no longer has enough gravitational force to overcome that of other bodies in the solar system. Randall even hangs a lampshade on it.



* ShockinglyExpensiveBill: You get this if you [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/35/ switch on]] an [[UpToEleven 11-petawatt]] hairdryer. Or [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/87/ run enough energy through a cell phone transmitter]] to vaporize a snowflake [[ItMakesSenseInContext in an attempt to levitate it]].

to:

* ShockinglyExpensiveBill: You get this if you [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/35/ switch on]] an [[UpToEleven 11-petawatt]] 11-petawatt hairdryer. Or [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/87/ run enough energy through a cell phone transmitter]] to vaporize a snowflake [[ItMakesSenseInContext in an attempt to levitate it]].



* UpToEleven: The [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/35/ Hair Dryer.]] 11 ''petawatts,'' that is. [[spoiler: [[SubvertedTrope Subverted]] destruction-wise, as while at the previous setting, the box would never leave the Earth, eventually destroying everything, here it is simply ejected into outer space. The devastation around the point of ejection is immense, but the Earth as a whole is safe.]]
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


** From the book, the result of making the periodic table out of 1-liter blocks of each element would result in a Class 0, as the transuranic elements would decay and produce a [[NukeEm massive continuous nuclear blast]], obliterating whatever city the table was in and spreading radioactive material all over the world.

to:

** From the book, the result of making the periodic table out of 1-liter blocks of each element would result in a Class 0, 1/Class 2, as the transuranic elements would decay and produce a [[NukeEm massive continuous nuclear blast]], obliterating whatever city the table was in and spreading radioactive material all over the world.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


''[[http://what-if.xkcd.com/ What If?]]'' is a blog by Creator/RandallMunroe, the creator of the StickFigureComic ''Webcomic/{{xkcd}}''. Updated [[ScheduleSlip erratically]][[labelnote:*]]The last post, "Earth-Moon Fire Pole," was posted in May 2018; the prior one had been posted in March 2017.[[/labelnote]], he answers off-the-wall reader questions using math, science, and ''xkcd''-style cartoons. Randall has a Website/{{Twitter}} feed, [[https://twitter.com/whatifnumbers @whatifnumbers]], of numbers he comes up with while writing the blog. He's also published a book, ''[[http://whatif.xkcd.com/book/ What If?: Serious Scientific Answers to Absurd Hypothetical Questions]]'', containing several of the more popular answers and some new ones.

to:

''[[http://what-if.xkcd.com/ What If?]]'' is a blog by Creator/RandallMunroe, the creator of the StickFigureComic ''Webcomic/{{xkcd}}''. ''Webcomic/{{xkcd}}'', started 10 July 2012. Updated [[ScheduleSlip erratically]][[labelnote:*]]The last post, "Earth-Moon Fire Pole," erratically]][[labelnote:*]]Originally it was posted in May 2018; the prior one had been posted in March 2017.Tuesdays, but it gradually shifted to "when I feel like it" starting about 2016.[[/labelnote]], he answers off-the-wall reader questions using math, science, and ''xkcd''-style cartoons. Randall has a Website/{{Twitter}} feed, [[https://twitter.com/whatifnumbers @whatifnumbers]], of numbers he comes up with while writing the blog. He's also published a book, ''[[http://whatif.xkcd.com/book/ What If?: Serious Scientific Answers to Absurd Hypothetical Questions]]'', containing several of the more popular answers and some new ones.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
Fix punctuation


* AbsurdlyHighStakesGame: In [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/105/ "Cannibalism"]], discussing how it would be determined who eats whom, he suggests flipping coins and making it into "the tournament bracket to end all tournament brackets.

to:

* AbsurdlyHighStakesGame: In [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/105/ "Cannibalism"]], discussing how it would be determined who eats whom, he suggests flipping coins and making it into "the tournament bracket to end all tournament brackets."
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


* LightningCanDoAnything: [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/16 Apparently a computer that is flashing the BIOS will install Microsoft Bob if hit by lightning.]]

to:

* LightningCanDoAnything: [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/16 Apparently a computer that is flashing the BIOS will install Microsoft Bob Gateway 2000 edition if hit by lightning.]]
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None

Added DiffLines:

* StarKilling: Joked about in one of the "Weird (and Worrying) Questions" sections, where the questioner asked whether it would be possible to build a new star.
-->'''Cartoon of questioner''': ''(holding a device marked "Sun Obliterator")'' [[RunningGag ...I need to know by Friday.]]
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None

Added DiffLines:

* PlanetaryRelocation: In [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/146/ "Stop Jupiter"]], Randall [[AvertedTrope largely dismisses the possibility]] of significantly altering Jupiter's (or any other planet's) orbit by using it for {{Spaceship Slingshot Stunt}}s, noting that Jupiter was only affected by 10^-21 meters per second when ''New Horizons'' did it on its way to Pluto: Jupiter is so huge it would hardly notice if we threw Earth's entire crust at it. He compares it to trying to stop a moving tractor trailer with a thrown tennis ball: [[GonnaNeedMoreX "...you need an awfully big tennis ball."]]
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
Moving cut Critical Research Failure entry.

Added DiffLines:

* ArtisticLicenseCars: A rare one for Randall, but it still happened. A question on how much power can be produced by [[Franchise/StarWars The Force]] compares Yoda's power output to that of a Smart Car, with Yoda popping out of the front hood of said car. However, the Smart Car is a rear-engine car, with the [[InsistentTerminology front flap]] covering various auxiliary components.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None

Added DiffLines:

* InCaseOfXBreakGlass: According to "[[http://what-if.xkcd.com/48/ Sunset On The British Empire]]", the interior walls of Buckingham Palace have numerous 'In Case Of Emergency, Break Glass' boxes. [[BritsLoveTea Each one has a cup of tea in it.]]
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


* LogicalExtreme: Some of the hilarity in the posts comes from the [[SerialEscalation progressively more ridiculous situations the What If? suggests]] (the ever-so-popular "What if we tried more power?" being one of them). They're plausible in RealLife, just not humanely ([[FlatWhat and, in some cases, inhumanely]]) possible.

to:

* LogicalExtreme: Some of the hilarity in the posts comes from the [[SerialEscalation progressively more ridiculous situations the What If? suggests]] (the ever-so-popular "What if we tried more power?" being one of them). They're plausible in RealLife, just not humanely humanly ([[FlatWhat and, in some cases, inhumanely]]) inhumanly]]) possible.
Tabs MOD

Changed: 30

Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
this looks like misuse of [[invoked]] tag


** In [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/64/ "Rising Steadily"]], [[FanNickname Danish]] [[invoked]] rises past the giraffes from [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/44/ High Throw]].

to:

** In [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/64/ "Rising Steadily"]], [[FanNickname Danish]] [[invoked]] "Danish" rises past the giraffes from [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/44/ High Throw]].

Added: 583

Removed: 583

Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


* AWizardDidIt: Used constantly, which seems a little unusual for a series that is all about SurprisinglyRealisticOutcome, but it's justified as so much of the series is about things that really can't actually happen in the first place, so "magic" is used to set up the scenario the question requires (for example, magically accelerating the baseball in [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/1/ Relativistic Baseball]], or a magically expanding and contracting firepole in [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/157/ Earth-Moon Fire Pole]]), and after that the situation plays out completely realistically.


Added DiffLines:

* AWizardDidIt: Used constantly, which seems a little unusual for a series that is all about SurprisinglyRealisticOutcome, but it's justified as so much of the series is about things that really can't actually happen in the first place, so "magic" is used to set up the scenario the question requires (for example, magically accelerating the baseball in [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/1/ Relativistic Baseball]], or a magically expanding and contracting firepole in [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/157/ Earth-Moon Fire Pole]]), and after that the situation plays out completely realistically.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


* FrivolousLawsuit: [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/96/ 2 undecillion]] explores what would happen if the guy who filed a 2 undecillion lawsuit actually won. Turns out, he'd never get the money awarded because it's ''flat out impossible'' for Au Bon Pain to gather that much money, ever. They wouldn't even get anywhere near the target amount if they were able to convert the Earth's weight into copies of the most valuable item buy weight ever sold (the Treeskilling Yellow postage stamp) and somehow sold all of them for the original's selling price.

to:

* FrivolousLawsuit: [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/96/ 2 undecillion]] explores what would happen if the guy who filed a 2 undecillion lawsuit actually won. Turns out, he'd never get the money awarded because it's ''flat out impossible'' for Au Bon Pain to gather that much money, ever. They wouldn't even get anywhere near the target amount if they were able to convert the Earth's weight into copies of the most valuable item buy by weight ever sold (the Treeskilling Yellow postage stamp) and somehow sold all of them for the original's selling price.



* GoneHorriblyWrong: The splash image and cover of the book depict a ''Tyrannosaurus rex'' being lowered into a [[Film/ReturnOfTheJedi Sarlacc pit]] on a crane, excellently illustrating the tone of the blog. The back cover of the book, under the dust jacket, shows the outcome of this scenario: [[spoiler: The T-Rex swings to the side of the pit, bites off its harness, damages the support structure of the crane, and run down the man on the ground.]] Clever girl.

to:

* GoneHorriblyWrong: The splash image and cover of the book depict a ''Tyrannosaurus rex'' being lowered into a [[Film/ReturnOfTheJedi Sarlacc pit]] on a crane, excellently illustrating the tone of the blog. The back cover of the book, under the dust jacket, shows the outcome of this scenario: [[spoiler: The T-Rex swings to the side of the pit, bites off its harness, damages the support structure of the crane, and run runs down the man on the ground.]] Clever girl.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
I thought I'd need to put this on the Trivia page.

Added DiffLines:

** As of 2015, there is [[https://www.imdb.com/title/tt5954666/?ref_=kw_li_tt one film about the Anglo-Zanzibar war listed on IMDB]], which is roughly 79% the length of that war, meaning that war probably has the highest movie:war length ratio of any war.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
Another random addition.

Added DiffLines:

*** [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/117/ In one case,]] Randall uses the capton "Actual Size" on an illustration of a single microbe. [[DontExplainTheJoke Since microbes are invisible to the human eye, it's just an arrow pointing at nothing.]][[note]]Though as the AltText points out, there ''are'' microbes on the point of that arrow...[[/note]]

Added: 297

Changed: 520

Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


* AllNaturalSnakeOil: [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/143/ "Europa Water Siphon"]] discusses about siphoning water from [[UsefulNotes/TheMoonsOfJupiter Europa]] and selling it as bottled water. Randall mentions that although there's no point in this, since water from Europa is just the same as water in Earth, the plan could work with the right marketing.

to:

* AllNaturalSnakeOil: [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/143/ "Europa Water Siphon"]] discusses about the idea of siphoning water from [[UsefulNotes/TheMoonsOfJupiter Europa]] and selling it as bottled water. Randall mentions that although there's no point in this, since water from Europa is just chemically the same as water in Earth, the plan could work with the right marketing.



** Again in the third image of [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/111/ "All the Money"]], this time butchering [[Literature/TheBible 1 Timothy 6:10]]:

to:

** Again in the third image of [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/111/ "All the Money"]], this time butchering [[Literature/TheBible 1 Timothy 6:10]]:6:10:



* BluntYes: [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/43/ "Train Loop"]] gives us a Blunt No instead.
--> '''Gero Walter:''' Could a high-speed train run through a vertical loop, like a rollercoaster, with the passengers staying comfortable?\\

to:

* BluntYes: BluntNo:
** From
[[http://what-if.xkcd.com/43/ "Train Loop"]] gives us a Blunt No instead.
-->
Loop"]]:
--->
'''Gero Walter:''' Could a high-speed train run through a vertical loop, like a rollercoaster, with the passengers staying comfortable?\\



** However, when the question of whether fire tornadoes exist is submitted, Randall's answer is simply "Yes." Then a brief aside noting that this fact is awesome.

to:

** However, Later subverted; when the question of whether fire tornadoes exist is submitted, Randall's answer is simply "Yes." a BluntYes. Then a brief aside noting that this fact is awesome.



-->Billions and Billions served, all of them former solicitor general Ted Olson

to:

-->Billions --->Billions and Billions served, all of them former solicitor general Ted Olson



--> '''Randall:''' The sky is dark at night [[superscript:[citation needed] ]] because the Sun is on the other side of the Earth. [[superscript:[citation needed] ]]

to:

--> ---> '''Randall:''' The sky is dark at night [[superscript:[citation needed] ]] because the Sun is on the other side of the Earth. [[superscript:[citation needed] ]]



* DugTooDeep: [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/135/ "Digging Downward"]] - "What would happen if I dug straight down, at a speed of 1 foot per second? What would kill me first?" Randall concludes that if you're assumed to be protected from the ''many'' things that could kill you, then the question becomes unanswerable scientifically, because by this point the scenario is pure fantasy. Which he notes, makes the answer obvious- [[Literature/TheLordOfTheRings a Balrog]].

to:

* DugTooDeep: [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/135/ "Digging Downward"]] - -- "What would happen if I dug straight down, at a speed of 1 foot per second? What would kill me first?" Randall concludes that if you're assumed to be protected from the ''many'' things that could kill you, then the question becomes unanswerable scientifically, because by this point the scenario is pure fantasy. Which he notes, makes the answer obvious- obvious -- [[Literature/TheLordOfTheRings a Balrog]].



* InstantGravestone: The end of [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/64/ "Rising Steadily"]] depicts the unfortunate thought-experiment victim as a steadily-rising gravestone.

to:

* InstantGravestone: The end of [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/64/ "Rising Steadily"]] depicts the unfortunate thought-experiment victim as a steadily-rising gravestone.gravestone after suffocating to death.



* MajorInjuryUnderreaction: [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/133/ "Dang."]] In response to ''having one's arms torn off'' as a result of grabbing a flagpole while falling from a building.

to:

* MajorInjuryUnderreaction: MajorInjuryUnderreaction:
**
[[http://what-if.xkcd.com/133/ "Dang."]] In response to ''having one's arms torn off'' as a result of grabbing a flagpole while falling from a building.



---> "If you were standing in the path of the (laser with a diameter of 1m that contains all of the sun's output of visible light), you would obviously die pretty quickly. You wouldn't really die ''of'' anything, in the traditional sense. You would just stop being biology and start being physics.

to:

---> --> "If you were standing in the path of the (laser with a diameter of 1m that contains all of the sun's output of visible light), you would obviously die pretty quickly. You wouldn't really die ''of'' anything, in the traditional sense. You would just stop being biology and start being physics.



--> The lowest route to Death Valley is probably by traveling up the Colorado River watershed, along the Arizona border past Quartzite, then northwest past Zzyzx, [[RealJokeName which is a real place.]]

to:

--> ---> The lowest route to Death Valley is probably by traveling up the Colorado River watershed, along the Arizona border past Quartzite, then northwest past Zzyzx, [[RealJokeName which is a real place.]]



* TheShortWar: [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/100/ "WWII Films"]] tries to determine which war has the greatest length of movies about war:length of actual war ratio, and naturally brings up a bunch of there. None of these quite manage to beat the ratio of WorldWarII, but there are some that he thinks might, though he can't find confirmation.

to:

* TheShortWar: [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/100/ "WWII Films"]] tries to determine which war has the greatest length of movies about war:length of actual war ratio, and naturally brings up a bunch of there. None of these quite manage to beat the ratio of WorldWarII, UsefulNotes/WorldWarII, but there are some that he thinks might, though he can't find confirmation.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
Added a more specific slipped schedule.


''[[http://what-if.xkcd.com/ What If?]]'' is a blog by Creator/RandallMunroe, the creator of the StickFigureComic ''Webcomic/{{xkcd}}''. Updated [[ScheduleSlip erratically]], he answers off-the-wall reader questions using math, science, and ''xkcd''-style cartoons. Randall has a Website/{{Twitter}} feed, [[https://twitter.com/whatifnumbers @whatifnumbers]], of numbers he comes up with while writing the blog. He's also published a book, ''[[http://whatif.xkcd.com/book/ What If?: Serious Scientific Answers to Absurd Hypothetical Questions]]'', containing several of the more popular answers and some new ones.

to:

''[[http://what-if.xkcd.com/ What If?]]'' is a blog by Creator/RandallMunroe, the creator of the StickFigureComic ''Webcomic/{{xkcd}}''. Updated [[ScheduleSlip erratically]], erratically]][[labelnote:*]]The last post, "Earth-Moon Fire Pole," was posted in May 2018; the prior one had been posted in March 2017.[[/labelnote]], he answers off-the-wall reader questions using math, science, and ''xkcd''-style cartoons. Randall has a Website/{{Twitter}} feed, [[https://twitter.com/whatifnumbers @whatifnumbers]], of numbers he comes up with while writing the blog. He's also published a book, ''[[http://whatif.xkcd.com/book/ What If?: Serious Scientific Answers to Absurd Hypothetical Questions]]'', containing several of the more popular answers and some new ones.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


* DugTooDeep: [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/135/ "Digging Downward"]] - "What would happen if I dug straight down, at a speed of 1 foot per second? What would kill me first?" The answer concludes with an image of [[Literature/TheLordOfTheRings Gandalf confronting the Balrog in Moria]].

to:

* DugTooDeep: [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/135/ "Digging Downward"]] - "What would happen if I dug straight down, at a speed of 1 foot per second? What would kill me first?" The answer Randall concludes with an image of that if you're assumed to be protected from the ''many'' things that could kill you, then the question becomes unanswerable scientifically, because by this point the scenario is pure fantasy. Which he notes, makes the answer obvious- [[Literature/TheLordOfTheRings Gandalf confronting the Balrog in Moria]].a Balrog]].
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


''(home row)'' [[KingArthur Galahad]] has a Flash SSD\\

to:

''(home row)'' [[KingArthur [[Myth/ArthurianLegend Galahad]] has a Flash SSD\\

Changed: 104

Removed: 4753

Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
Shout Out moved to a seperate page.


** Later installments that involve something magically disappearing (like in [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/103/ "Vanishing Water"]]) assume that the empty space left is replaced with air, to avoid a "[[CallBack glass half empty]]" scenario.

to:

** Later installments that involve something magically disappearing (like in [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/103/ "Vanishing Water"]]) assume that the empty space left is replaced with air, to avoid a "[[CallBack glass half empty]]" scenario.



-->There's some good news: Deep in the Sun, the photons carrying energy around have very short wavelengths—they're mostly a mix of what we'd consider hard and soft X-rays. This means they penetrate your body to various depths, heating your internal organs and also ionizing your DNA, causing irreversible damage before they even start burning you. Looking back, I notice that I started this paragraph with "there's some good news." I don't know why I did that.

to:

-->There's some good news: Deep in the Sun, the photons carrying energy around have very short wavelengths—they're mostly a mix of what we'd consider hard and soft X-rays. This means they penetrate your body to various depths, heating heat your internal organs organs, and also ionizing ionize your DNA, causing irreversible damage before they even start burning you. Looking back, I notice that I started this paragraph with "there's some good news." I don't know why I did that.



** In the course of [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/17/ "Green Cows"]], Munroe makes up the unit "megayodas" for power, in reference to a previous entry [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/3/ on Yoda's energy output]].

to:

** In the course of [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/17/ "Green Cows"]], Munroe makes up the unit "megayodas" for power, in reference to about a previous entry [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/3/ on Yoda's energy output]].



** In the [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/1/ first]] entry, the question is "What would happen if you tried to hit a baseball going 90% the speed of light?" The end result is the complete annihilation of the batter, pitcher, ballpark, and everything within a mile radius. But, for what it's worth:

to:

** In the [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/1/ first]] entry, the question is "What would happen if you tried to hit a baseball going 90% the speed of light?" The end result is the complete annihilation of the batter, pitcher, ballpark, and everything within a mile radius. But, for what it's worth:



* HideYourChildren: In the question asking "What if everyone in the world gathered in one place and jumped at the same time?" He assumes all 7 billion people in the whole world was magically transported to Rhode Island and all jumped (affecting nothing) and wonder why we did that and then trying to make their way home. It conveniently [[Administrivia/TropesAreTools and understandably]] ignores all the children who would be present but possibly be far from their parents and caregivers (hopefully families were transported together) and millions of babies and disabled people who can't jump.

to:

* HideYourChildren: In the question asking "What if everyone in the world gathered in one place and jumped at the same time?" He assumes all 7 billion people in the whole world was were magically transported to Rhode Island and all jumped (affecting nothing) and wonder why we did that and then trying tried to make their way home. It conveniently [[Administrivia/TropesAreTools and understandably]] ignores all the children who would be present but possibly be far from their parents and caregivers (hopefully families were transported together) and millions of babies and disabled people who can't jump.



* LiteralMetaphor: While explaining why you can't set fire to something with a magnifying glass and moonlight in [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/145/ "Fire From Moonlight"]], Randall makes a remark about the reason involving "a rabbit hole of optics". Cue image of a ''literal'' rabbit hole with a bunch of lenses in it.

to:

* LiteralMetaphor: While explaining why you can't set fire to something with a magnifying glass and moonlight in [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/145/ "Fire From Moonlight"]], Randall makes a remark about remarks the reason involving "a rabbit hole of optics". Cue image of a ''literal'' rabbit hole with a bunch of lenses in it.



* MovingTheGoalposts: Done in [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/43/ "Train Loop"]] in order to allow for an interesting answer (as in, other than "no"). "Could a high-speed train run through a vertical loop, like a rollercoaster, with the passengers staying comfortable?" becomes (changes bolded) "Could a '''modified and reinforced''' high-speed train '''with a jet engine on top''' run through a vertical loop, like a rollercoaster, with the passengers '''surviving'''?"

to:

* MovingTheGoalposts: Done in [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/43/ "Train Loop"]] in order to allow for an interesting answer (as in, other than "no"). "Could a high-speed train run through a vertical loop, like a rollercoaster, with the passengers staying comfortable?" becomes (changes bolded) "Could a '''modified and reinforced''' high-speed train '''with a jet engine on top''' run through a vertical loop, like a rollercoaster, with the passengers '''surviving'''?"



** In the [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/30/ "Interplanetary Cessna"]] entry, each and every one of the 32 result diagrams had an {{alt text}} describing the pilot's reactions. Sadly, Randall has removed the image map making alt text for different parts of the image possible (presumably for technical reasons), causing them to be lost; thus, for the sake of posterity, we present all 32 of them here:

to:

** In the [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/30/ "Interplanetary Cessna"]] entry, each and every one of the 32 result diagrams had an {{alt text}} describing the pilot's reactions. Sadly, Randall has removed the image map making alt text for different parts of the image possible (presumably for technical reasons), causing them to be lost; thus, for the sake of posterity, we present all 32 of them here:



** "[[http://what-if.xkcd.com/36/ Cornstarch]]". The kick key phrase in the question is 'unpleasant things', so the author continues to assume that the person performing the experiment is having fun (and has an infinite amount of spare time and cornstarch), even after the oobleck blocks the drains, overflows the sink, fills the tester's home, blows out a window, and causes the tester to be dumped out onto the lawn in the resultant flood. But if the tester honestly enjoyed spending several months and several hundred thousand dollars making oobleck and destroying their home until the authorities shut off the water supply, technically no unpleasant things happened.

to:

** "[[http://what-if.xkcd.com/36/ Cornstarch]]". The kick key phrase in the question is 'unpleasant things', so the author continues to assume that the person performing the experiment experimenting is having fun (and has an infinite amount of spare time and cornstarch), even after the oobleck blocks the drains, overflows the sink, fills the tester's home, blows out a window, and causes the tester to be dumped out onto the lawn in the resultant flood. But if the tester honestly enjoyed spending several months and several hundred thousand dollars making oobleck and destroying their home until the authorities shut off the water supply, technically no unpleasant things happened.



* ShoutOut:
** Occasional jokes involving the [citation needed] meme spawned by Wiki/{{Wikipedia}}.
** The AltText for the third image of "[[http://what-if.xkcd.com/37/ Supersonic Stereo]]": "[[WesternAnimation/AvatarTheLastAirbender My cabbages!]]"
** [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/41/ "Go West"]] borrows its name from the song by Music/VillagePeople, and the AltText for the second image reads, "cars drive west, every one driven by someone [[EarWorm with that song in their head]]".
** From [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/43/ "Train Loop"]]:
*** The second image has the locomotive going [[Literature/TheLittleEngineThatCould "I think I can, I think I can,"]] and the AltText lampshades it with "the little engine that let everyone down".
*** AltText for the fourth image: [[Literature/TheLordOfTheRings "i will diminish, and go into the west, and remain a train"]]
** To ''Videogame/TheOregonTrail'' in the final image of [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/121/ "Frozen Rivers"]].
*** "You lost 3 family members and 2 oxen fording the river! I mean, you didn't lose them. They're right there. But they're definitely not going anywhere."
** To ''VideoGame/{{Minecraft}}'' in the fourth image of [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/57/ "Dropping a Mountain"]].
** [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/60/ "Signs of Life"]] contains the sentence "Wait for nightfall." followed by a footnote that, instead of containing a citation, references the classic SF story "Nightfall" by Creator/IsaacAsimov.
** The AltText for the eighth image of [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/68/ "Little Planet"]] reads, "This is [[VideoGame/KerbalSpaceProgram KSP]] on nightmare mode."
*** In the print edition, footnote 3 reads "This is presumably what happened to VideoGame/SonicTheHedgehog."
** The AltText of the second image of [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/73/ "Lethal Neutrinos"]] refers to [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Faster-than-light_neutrino_anomaly the kerfuffle over neutrinos traveling faster than light]], which later turned out to be an equipment screwup.
---> "Hey, these ones arrived faster than light! Wait, no."
** [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/77/ "Growth Rate"]]:
*** The first paragraph and its image compare the birth length of the average human baby to [[Film/ANewHope the Death Star's exhaust port and a womp rat]]. He later compares the ensuing rapidly growing baby to the heights of [[Franchise/StarWars Yoda and Darth Vader]].
*** To ''Film/AirBud'' in the AltText of the thirteenth image:
----> "What do you mean 'against the rules'? Your team has a freakin' golden retriever!"
** [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/42/ "Longest Sunset"]]:
*** There's one to ''Literature/TheHitchhikersGuideToTheGalaxy'' in the Alt Text of the third image. Appropriate, since it's the 42nd post.
*** Also, another one to ''Minecraft'' in the sixth, this time the image itself.
** [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/103/ "Vanishing Water"]]
*** The Alt Text to the third image is another ''Air Bud'' ref.
*** The fourth image is another ''Hitchhikers'' ref.
** The first footnote in [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/124/ "Lunar Swimming"]]:
--->"Inertia is a property of matter[[labelnote:[1] ]]♬ [[Series/BillNyeTheScienceGuy BILL NYE]] [[EarWorm THE SCIENCE GUY]] ♬[[/labelnote]] independent of gravity.
** [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/126/ In "Stairs"]], the first image's AltText:
--->[[Literature/HouseOfLeaves ſtairs! We have found ſtairs!]]
** The last line of [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/127/ "Tug of War"]]:
--->"In the end, trying to develop stronger ropes leads only to greater danger to everyone, both participants and bystanders. In the ultimate game of tug-of-war ... [[Film/WarGames the only winning move is not to pull]].
*** The article also mentions a footnote pointing out that "People often play tug-of-war with their dogs. Going by weight alone, 30 humans would probably be about evenly matched against WesternAnimation/OneHundredAndOneDalmatians."
** The third image in [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/50/ "Extreme Boating"]] shouts out to ''Film/{{Jaws}}''.
** [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/141/ "Sunbeam"]] has Shout-Outs[=/=]{{Take That}}s to ''Literature/{{Twilight}}'' and its two sequels.
** One of the charts in [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/147/ "Niagara Straw"]] shows the rating [[WebAnimation/HomestarRunner "very yes"]].
** ''Series/LookAroundYou'' with "[[https://what-if.xkcd.com/97/ What IS fire? We just don't know.]]" [[labelnote:*]]birds in the original[[/labelnote]] and "[[https://what-if.xkcd.com/152/ Thanks, Nick. Thick.]]"
** [[https://what-if.xkcd.com/18/ "BB Gun"]], the AltText for the first image, inevitably, has a reference to [[Film/AChristmasStory shooting your eye out]].
** The final image in "[[https://what-if.xkcd.com/44/ High Throw]]" is of a small girl releasing a red balloon. The AltText says "[[Music/{{Nena}} just 98 more]]".
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


* SeriesHiatus: Munroe has put the series on hold quite a few times, once from April to July 2015, again from September 2015 to January 2016, then from June 2016 to January 2017, then finally from March 2017 till now (which, given that the latest is 4 years and counting at this point, is edging the series from "hiatus" to "OrphanedSeries").

Top