Fits in Heavy's pocket!
You know you just slapped me on the butt, right?
Sorry, I was aiming for your sister
The last thing you hear before an unstoppable juggernaut bisects you with a minigun.
jasper (thats my actual name)
Why did you just ignore me?
No. Never. And even after that.
im not just any trash, im lapidot trash
my current job
So, you wanna go drug some mice and kick them into the English Channel?
I feel like I've been tied to the whipping post.
The possum is a potential perpetrator; he did place possum poo in the plum pot.
The Scarlet Witch
Are you into BDSM, perhaps?
Because I had stuff to do.
"Thanks for the lesson. But I don't need you to tell me who I am."
The King Without a Kingdom
Transcender of Gender
You, uh, you wanna go half on one of these delicious cooked faces?
I won't be tricked by your mind games!
they/them || "Forgive me, regent of queer amphibians" - Lt.BGob
Into Oblivion
What will you do now, so-called hero?
My Xion plushie is MINE! NO ONE ELSE'S!
please call me "XionKuriyama" or some variation, thanks! | What is the good deed that you can do right now?
The Scarlet Witch
Can I borrow your Xion plushie for awhile?
He had a Rosalina amiibo, I had to do it!
"Thanks for the lesson. But I don't need you to tell me who I am."
my current job
Why did you glomp that avatar with -40 damage battle gloves?
None, it's actually Grimdark.
The possum is a potential perpetrator; he did place possum poo in the plum pot.
Is there love in the Warhammer 40K reality?
...Well, it's a long story involving that animatronic we found, an empty yellow suit, and a two-headed dildo...
The fact that only 140 characters are allowed here is honestly so disappointing to me.
The Scarlet Witch
...What just happened?!
There's blood on my hands!
"Thanks for the lesson. But I don't need you to tell me who I am."
Tief girl with eartude
What if I told you that you helped finance one of Uwe Boll's movies?
If I give you a hug, will you leave me alone?
TV Tropes's No. 1 bread themed lesbian. she/her, fae/faer
The King Without a Kingdom
my current job
Quick, what's the first Jack Nicholson line that you can think of?
Oh, they're jamming in the attic.
The possum is a potential perpetrator; he did place possum poo in the plum pot.
The Scarlet Witch
Why is there noise coming from the attic?
But he's sooo dreamy! :)
"Thanks for the lesson. But I don't need you to tell me who I am."
Into Oblivion
Why in the name of Kingdom Hearts would you want to date Vexen?!
Hey, don't ask me, I don't read that shit.
please call me "XionKuriyama" or some variation, thanks! | What is the good deed that you can do right now?
The fuck is this Urgot/Gragas ship fic doing here?
Look, you ate my arms at least twice, I feel fully justified in kissing you.
The fact that only 140 characters are allowed here is honestly so disappointing to me.
The Scarlet Witch
Why would you kiss me?!
I woke up and there were spider webs all over my room!
"Thanks for the lesson. But I don't need you to tell me who I am."
This is really quite impolite! Why is it that when your house was robbed you assumed my highly trained spider thieves were to blame?
Because you got magma all over my shoes!
Braids From S286 Not Included
Why are you jumping around like that?
He's obsessed with bears!
"Rarity, are you okay? We gotta get you and your friends outta here soon!"
my current job
The heck is a bearhead doing in Jerry's room?
...sounds ambitious.
The possum is a potential perpetrator; he did place possum poo in the plum pot.
quickest draw in the west
Do you think I could make a universe with my bare hands?
As far as I know, the lion's always been there.
the gost. ooo 👻
Holy shit there's a lion and three wolves in my room !
...that might be a bit petty.
Worldbuilding is fun, writing is a chore
"Just as planned."
Do you really think he'll sue over the 'Fruit flies like a banana' comment?
... that is the worst thing you've ever done.
"Did you expect somebody else?"
Why'd you do it?
Uh, yeah, I meant to do that.