Manly Guys Doing Manly Things

There's a trick to this. Designate one pocket the key pocket. Always put your keys there. Of course, every so often, I forget and put my keys in a different pocket, and spend an hour looking for them, but it's better than constantly spending 15 minutes finding them every day.

Brought to you by the people who may be a bit too pro-Liefeld for anyone to be comfortable.

EDIT: Also, since when does Cable take any transport that isn't "Bodyslide by (number of people present)"?

edited 6th Jun '16 8:22:48 AM by 32_Footsteps

I'll never get over how stupid "Bodyslide" sounds as a means of transport.

Don't get cocky, DC fans. "Boom Tube" is just as bad.

Eh, I give both a pass. Neither was developed in our contemporary culture In-Universe; I'll give that a Hand Wave of in-universe Values Dissonance (specifically, the value of what sounds good in a given culture).

Also, "bodyslide" gets a bit more leeway because I think Cable specifically picked that phrase so that nobody would accidentally trigger Graymalkin (the computer that handled Cable's teleportation machinery) and just teleport things at random. That said, at least it's strongly suggested that boom tubes got their name as a slang term in-universe because they look like tubes and their activation is really fricking loud. Maybe not creative, but it would be Exactly What It Says on the Tin.

I don't even have that many pockets normally, and I also have a habit of putting my things in the same spot whenever possible, including my wallet and my cell phone.

I have for the last few weeks dedicated one pocket of my various jackets/shirts to carrying my keys in. It also helps I tether them to said jacket/shirt with the mommy and daddy of all lengths of elastic shock cord to avoid losing them.

Oh dear, she has like 13 pockets? I have a vest with 42, it came with a bloody map.

Aren't Liefeld's characters covered in pouches because each pouch carries one round of ammo for their refrigerator-sized guns?

Not gonna lie, I thought bodyslide referred to picking up some hapless bystander and using them as a ramp.

@2861 Well, if we're not just making fun of Liefeld, I think the actual reason is because the lack of pockets on characters bothered him (which is fair; it bothers a lot of people that superheroes wouldn't have pockets), but he still wanted the skintight outfits. Pouches were the obvious solution. He just went overboard with it - there is a point of diminishing returns for that kind of thing. Still, it's not like people don't go overboard with pockets - I remember the early 90's, when John Popper of Blues Traveler had a vest with over a dozen pockets, all with a harmonica.

For all the pouch jokes that are fun to make, it's probably the most realistic thing Liefeld does.

Reaper, chillaxin; and dropping a bomb of insight on Jared.

I was wondering if the edgelord was gonna make an appearance. 76 and Reinhardt are also good candidates.

I take it from Jared's reaction in the first panel that most people who go through those offices have a bit more of a grasp on Gun Safety than Reaper does.

Given that these guys are all hypermasculine man-bros, I somehow doubt trigger discipline is a concept most of these people have heard of. Jared is simply responding quite understandably to having a gun shoved in your face. You don't get used to constant unintended death threats^Listen! One of the first things you're taught about firearms: it doesn't matter if it's unloaded, it doesn't matter if the safety is on, it doesn't matter what mitigating circumstances you might think exists. To point your weapon at a person is to make a violent threat against their life. It communicates that you are ready and willing to make them die. They and anyone else around are well within their rights to respond accordingly. from your clients.

edited 13th Jun '16 11:44:41 AM by TobiasDrake

I mean, I'm sure they've heard of trigger discipline. Seems like that'd be exactly the kind of thing this clinic would try to teach.

I wonder what Drake of the 99 Dragons Reaper is doing here, anyway. Perhaps he thinks Commander Badass is a member of Overwatch.

Considering Reaper throws his every gun away after finishing the clip, I wouldn't be surprised if he isn't aware of the concept of safety locks.

@2687 I beg to differ - most of these guys have been repeatedly shown to not be sticking weapons into other people's faces. And it's not like Jared is only hanging out with guys like Kratos, who has a comparatively small range limit. Duke Nukem doesn't lead with a gun, even when he's wearing multiple ammo belts as suspenders. Marcus Fenix doesn't lead with a gun, even when nobody has randomly stuck him in a bikini. I'm going to guess that most of the guys know better.

He does what?! If he throws away every gun after unloading the clip, then he hasn't heard of reloading, let alone safety locks.

Neither of those guys had a gun in hand, though. Those comics don't show how they behave while holding a gun. I'm sure even Reaper puts down the guns at some point. Like, it'd be hard to pee while holding them. And messy.

edited 13th Jun '16 12:46:43 PM by TobiasDrake

@2691 The fact that neither of those guys had a gun in hand is kind of my point - you don't just walk around with a gun out at all times. I believe it's the corollary to "never point the gun at anything unless you're willing to pull the trigger" - don't take the gun out if you're not intending to pull the trigger at anything.

However, those guys have been at the rehab for some time, while Reaper seems like a fresh arrival.

Yeah, every character has a unique reload animation. Reaper's consists of him dropping the guns and pulling another pair out of his armpits coat, Drake style.

It really annoys the cowboy character McCree.

It's also a common trope.

Drake? If anything that reminds me of Neo in the lobby shootout.

That would probably explain why Drake did it, actually.

I did what now?

Also, Reaper is a guy who could really use some Commander rehab. In case you didn't know, he was a formerly no-nonsense and self-respecting black ops specialist whose jealousy over his best friend being promoted past him led to a violent confrontation that destroyed their international peacekeeping organization and left him for dead. He was then resuscitated and can now turn into smoke, wears a skull mask and trenchcoat, and unironically says things like "The reckoning draws near" and "Death walks among you" and "Mwahahaha!".

Incidentally, literally no one takes him seriously. Tragic, really.

Not you, Drake. Another Drake. I think. I'm confused.