Digital Analogy
Unfortunately, you get arrested for driving without a license. You also happen to be in a country with awful legal system and corrupt officials and you are fined with whatever money you had in the pickup. Also you're given a death sentence.
In porto perse vitulus est.
All that in one post? 
Fortunately, it's also a country that sucks up to the United States. The president interferes and you get clemency.
The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they're going to be when you kill them.
What's going on?
Unfortunately, you now have assassins after you.
Know thyself, and know thy enemy.
Fortunately, they're incompetent.
The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they're going to be when you kill them.
Unfortunately, the ninjas aren't.
Fortunately, the ninjas are not sent to kill you.
The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they're going to be when you kill them.
Dread Pirate Captain
Unfortunately, the hitmen sent after you is competent - in fact, they carry RPGs and miniguns!
edited 25th Oct '12 3:37:34 PM by DarkDestruction
Don't stop, just proceed, 'cause this is what you need-proceed, just proceed, 'cause this is what you need!
What's going on?
Fortunately, the ninjas kill them.
Know thyself, and know thy enemy.
Unfortunately, after all that ado, you suddenly decide to commit suicide.
The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they're going to be when you kill them.
<33
Fortunately, the ninjas stop you.
edited 25th Oct '12 3:47:35 PM by WertyYertrew
but the future refused to change. the miracle never happen.
Unfortunately, you're so depressed that you convince them to commit suicide, too.
The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they're going to be when you kill them.
What's going on?
Fortunately, a wave of happiness caused by a group of Magical Girls (who are completely unrelated to you and your situation) dispels the depression.
edited 25th Oct '12 3:57:00 PM by VampiricOne
Know thyself, and know thy enemy.
edited 25th Oct '12 4:36:12 PM by PhysicalStamina
Unfortunately, the ninjas have some ancient feud or other with the magical girls. They fight and everyone dies. Since the magical girls are now dead, the depression returns.
edited 25th Oct '12 4:04:07 PM by AnEditor
The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they're going to be when you kill them.
What's going on?
Fortunately, the magical girls come back because Death Is Cheap.
Know thyself, and know thy enemy.
Burn It Down In The End
Unfortunately, they come back as Dark Magical Girls and proceed to kill everyone.
Every time a fairy says that it doesn't believe in humans, a human child dies.
Am I a weirdo?
Fortunately they are only killing everyone so we can all ascend to a higher plane of existence.
Bigotry will NEVER be welcome on TV Tropes.
Unfortunately, the magical girls GOT THE POISON IN THEIR BLOOD.
Fortunately, that's a good thing. The whole "only killing everyone so that they can ascend to a higher plane of excistence" is lame. I say good riddance.
The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they're going to be when you kill them.
Digital Analogy
Unfortunately your best friend gets a cancer.
In porto perse vitulus est.
What's going on?
Fortunately, the author shows up and sets everything right.
Know thyself, and know thy enemy.
Digital Analogy
Unfortunately the author is an asshole and writes up new obstacles for you.
In porto perse vitulus est.
Off-duty Writer
Edited by PatchworkSpace on Jul 5th 2020 at 3:33:00 PM
Unfortunately, your friend was corrupted by her sudden, extraordinary amount of power, and now wants to take over the world.
The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they're going to be when you kill them.
Fortunately, the money fell into a passing pickup truck that you happened to be driving!
"Steel wins battles. Gold wins wars."