Librarian

She does it surprisingly well. "My land. Get out."

edited 16th Feb '17 7:15:22 AM by BlackMageAnolis

Border control.

Wait, what? What kind of nightmare is this?!

Zig!Hoshi comes across Sharko.

Oh no.

edited 16th Feb '17 7:18:06 AM by arcada188

Zig

Lord English runs marathons, slaughtering the competition in the process.

edited 7th Mar '17 9:31:19 PM by TheGamechanger

Marathon runner.

"Now, looking at me, you may think I like to rummage through the trash for fun, and you'd be right! And here's why; sometimes when you rummage through the trash, you find a gem! That's what big-mammal employers like you should be doing! You might see us little fellas as trash, as dirty business not worth getting your paws in; but what you don't realise is that, if you just rummage through us, you'll find lots of gems worth lots of money! ...This seemed much easier on the TV."

edited 16th Feb '17 8:09:29 AM by PresidentStalkeyes

Civil rights activist.

"I don't think that's how it works... But I'll try regardless!"

*The company loses massive profit as a result of Georgia eating all the shrimp.*

edited 6th Mar '17 4:11:16 AM by BaconZorp

Shrimp farmer

I get to interact with dead people. It's fine for me.

edited 5th Mar '17 6:46:37 PM by CyberController

Exorcist Exorcists are meant to kick unwanted spirits out of people's homes.

Welp, back to my old job then.

edited 6th Mar '17 3:24:56 PM by Jaxfirebus

Engineer.

SAVER OF HUMENS!

"Now that I'm in charge, I will BRING PAPER MARIO BACK TO ITS GLORY DAYS!... wait what do you mean that's a second-party series? What do you mean that's out of my control?"

"..."

"Crap."

edited 6th Mar '17 8:49:43 AM by BaconZorp

Nintendo CEO.

This is boring. I'd rather be lost in the wilderness again.

edited 6th Mar '17 11:25:22 AM by CyberController

Notary.

Ah-h... h-hello. What kind of drink would you l-like?...

edited 6th Mar '17 11:38:42 AM by arcada188

Bartender

I'm prescribe a whole lot-a pills for your cold.

edited 6th Mar '17 12:25:22 PM by TheFarmboy

Doctor.

"But... but I can't draw."

edited 6th Mar '17 11:31:32 AM by BaconZorp

Rule 34 artist.

Everyone got really depressed when I started cheerleading. I was kicked out really fast.

edited 6th Mar '17 2:24:14 PM by CyberController

Cheerleaders

XCOM commander who hires soldiers who can somehow miss even if their targets are standing literally two centimetres in front of the barrel of their weapon.

Gorgon Freechman's Assastint

YES! i will invent something that will make F 2 Ps the master race,

THE ROCKET POWERED GIBUS!

edited 7th Mar '17 7:02:33 PM by Jaxfirebus

Rocket scientist.

"..."

Georgia IS short enough for Loli and the like... but she's still really uncomfortable about this.

"Can... can I stop now? I don't wanna do this anymore..."

Seriously though what the hell dude?

edited 7th Mar '17 7:39:08 AM by BaconZorp

'yer a fetish model now.

Shooting Range Target (well, it seems to be a price of machinery, so why not?)

Art critics laughed at Lord English's art, so he killed them all in retaliation.

edited 7th Mar '17 9:59:56 PM by TheGamechanger

Artist.

I was fired from the first day on the job. Pity, because I almost convinced them to join my sister.

edited 8th Mar '17 7:53:09 AM by CyberController

Suicide prevention hotline worker.

WHAT?!

edited 7th Mar '17 10:50:57 PM by arcada188

Diamond Cleaver (Yes, this is a real life job)

Lord English got fired for killing all the birthday boys and girls, but he doesn't care.

edited 8th Mar '17 6:32:17 AM by TheGamechanger

Birthday clown.

"WHY THE HELL AM I GETTING ALL THE PERVY JOBS?!"

edited 8th Mar '17 4:49:51 AM by BaconZorp

Recreator of the human race. You know how all the women died in LISA, right? Do you understand now?

What?! You monster!

edited 10th Mar '17 11:38:56 PM by arcada188