Power Rangers as a whole

03x07 - Ninja Quest, Part IV

• Now that the new ninja suits and Zords have been unveiled, we get a new OP to show off them and Rito. Again, good willpower on not throwing this to us until we actually got to see them in the show.
• The Rangers summon their Ninjazords to battle Rito and save Angel Grove! The city, thankfully, has not yet been destroyed despite Rito having plenty of time to get at least a bit of work done. Given his performance in the forest ambush, he probably just forgot and f*cked off to go take a giant nap in the park.
• I'm pretty sure the Ape is a guy in a costume but I think the other Zords are just new footage filmed with toys. I can't be positive. The wolf and bear in particular are unapologetically lifeless toys. Also, is the Ape supposed to be an Ape? Because it has swords. I feel like it's supposed to be a robot man and they just called it the Ape Ninjazord for the sake of keeping the animal theme.
• Zedd throws a fit over the Rangers' new and improved Zords but Rita reminds him that they still have the Vampirus age waiting to hatch. Yes, soon the Vampirus will be able to attack the temple and Ninjor! Which will not stop the Rangers from getting new powers and Zords because that ship's already sailed, so it's really just spite at this point. Can't blame Zedd for not being particularly enthused.
• The Ape smacks down Rito with his double polearm, because when I think of apes, I think of double polearms. Rito tries to bust out a flamethrower in retaliation, but the Rangers form the Ninja Megazord and with the help of some really cheap animal face graphics, they are able to strike him down.
• But the power of MS Paint is strong with Rito as well. A black inkwell spills over the footage, allowing him to escape to safety even as he is clearly exploding and dying.
• As Bulk and Skull continue their training, a musical theme plays about the physical requirements of being a cop. It's stupid but also catchy.
• The Vampirus finally hatches! Way too late to be of any value to Rita and Zedd.
• The alarm in the Command Center blares, so they scan Angel Grove for trouble. They check various neighborhoods but see nothing amiss, so next they try to scan the solar system. Um. That's a bit of a leap. How about California first? North America? Earth? You're just jumping from "Youth Center" to "Jupiter", eh Billy? In any case, it doesn't matter because the solar scanner's still busted.
• Tommy: Well, we do know one thing: it isn't anything here on Earth.
  • YOU CHECKED THREE NEIGHBORHOODS IN ANGEL GROVE!!! Then gave up because you couldn't scan f*cking Jupiter! You have no basis for that statement, Tommy Olliver.
• The Bulk and Skull failure montage continues with various training mishaps. One in particular vexes me. They fail to keep pace with the group while jogging and instead show up crawling through painful cacti off the trail. Why are they crawling through cacti? What did they think that was going to accomplish?
• Vampirus calls out Ninjor and barely gets two threats in before Zedd and Rita grow him. Still trigger-happy on that, I see.
• Ninjor responds by growing himself, and the two prepare to have a giant duel. Man, I don't even want the Power Rangers to rescue him. I want Ninjor to break Vampirus's face by himself. He's supposed to be this ancient master who forged the Rangers' power, right? He should be able to handle a bat costume trying in vain to impersonate Peter Lorre.
• Back at the Command Center, Billy completes the repairs to the Command Center. I thought Alpha said it would take centuries to get the place back online. Those sure were some quick centuries.
• The alarm blares again as Zordon finds Vampirus, because he didn't buy that shit about, "We can't scan Jupiter, therefore it's not on Earth." Seriously, that was some wishful thinking on Tommy's part. I think he's just tired and wanted to go home. It's been a long day.
• Zordon explains that Ninjor and the temple are key components of keeping the Rangers' powers. What, so the Ninjazords don't have ontological inertia? That's awkward.
• The Rangers morph into action and I really miss their triumphant shouts of their power dinos. Those have been replaced by half-apathetic exclamations of "[Color] Ranger Power."
• As the Rangers call upon their Ninjazords, Ninjor trolls Vampirus with a Flash Step, a smoke bomb disappearance, and riding around on a flying cloud. I'm not convinced he actually needed any assistance.
• Whoops, spoke too soon. Vampirus somehow traps Ninjor with his secret weakness: the color red. By applying food coloring to the sky, Ninjor goes from effortlessly avoiding his attacks to prone on the ground. Vampirus doesn't even hit him. The red sky seems to have the same effect on him as kryptonite to Superman.
• Ninjor succumbs to rage over how stupid the above plot point is and transforms into a samurai Ninjor thing. I seriously have no idea what's even happening anymore. And where are the Rangers while all this is going on?!
• Ninjor whips out a polearm and hits Vampirus so hard it knocks the food coloring out of the sky. Only then do the Rangers arrive, forming the Megazord to killsteal. Yeah, they weren't needed here at all.
• Once the Rangers return to the Command Center, Ninjor contacts them again to have a conversation he totes couldn't have had when they were at the temple killstealing Vampirus. He explains that he's available to be summoned into battle against evil. He's the new Titanus/Tor, I guess? Since Tor and Titanus f*cked off to the Giant Robot Unemployment office alongside Dragonzord.
• Somehow Bulk and Skull not only got through their months of training in the Police Academy in the short time the Rangers have been away, but are actually graduating. The f*ck?! They have done nothing but fail. They knock down the entire procession in the middle of the ceremony because they are so bad at everything. That they could actually become cops is an alarming indictment of the poor training standards for American police.

03x08 - A Brush with Destiny

• With all that hefty plot out of the way, it looks like we're back to the padded oneshots. It'll be nice to have a break before any serious plot happens again.
• The episode opens on some serious plot happening. Damn you, Power Rangers, you fooled me with the single episode titles! Kimberly's mom is marrying a French painter and they're moving to France. Wow, that happened quickly. The guy just seems to be in town for some art gallery thing the Youth Center is doing. This is the first we're hearing of this?
• Kimberly: How can I just leave, Aisha? I'm a Power Ranger. I can't just quit.
  • Half the original team is already gone. You demonstrably can. But you don't have to because, and I know this tends to slip everyone's notice a lot, YOU CAN F*CKING TELEPORT. Nothing says you have to live in Angel Grove to defend it. Nowhere in Zordon's rules did he say, "You must reside within 40 miles of the Command Center."
• Kimberly has a trippy dream about the painter whose name isn't important enough to know turning out to be some art monster while the Pink Ranger waves goodbye to her. Bit on the nose, but okay.
• Rita: (presented with a gift from Finster) Oh goody! I love presents! (to Zedd) You never give me anything but a headache!
  • He just gave you a brand new telescope in the four-parter immediately preceding this episode!
• The device is a conveniently timed dream reading device that lets them read Kimberly's dreams. Lacking vital context, they just assume the scary monster design is distressing her, so Rita orders Finster to make it real.
• Kimberly meets the team at the park the next day to discuss options.
• Adam: Maybe we should tell Zordon about this.
• Billy: Nah, I'm sure he already knows.
  • Billy zings Zordon on his voyeur tendencies.
• Aisha: Have you tried talking this over with your mother?
  • "Mom, we need to talk about this Paris move. I love this opportunity for you and I'm glad you can go, but I have to stay in California to be a Power Ranger. I'm sure I - what? Why, yes, I can teleport. Why do you ask?"
• Finster completes upgrades to the device, allowing it to convert dreams into reality. Wow, that is a lot of unnecessarily hard work. I just thought Finster would mold the monster from the dream and bake it in the monster maker. Finster really took the painfully long way around.
• The Tengas attack the Rangers! They abduct Kimberly while the rest of the mob holds down Tommy all at once. The other four Rangers just sort of wander off while Finster zaps Kimberly. Yes, after building a science-defying dream-to-matter zapper gun, this plan then relied on Finster being able to scan an incapacitated Power Ranger. When he could have just made a f*cking monster.
• At the Youth Center, Bulk and Skull fell asleep on guard duty and now one of the paintings is missing! Some bold thief stole it from the canvas directly behind the sleeping pair. Now that's insult to injury.
• Zordon contacts the Rangers and asks them to come in, to which they comply. Kim misses the memo, however, because her communicator fell off in the park after she was zapped.
• Zordon reveals the Artist Mole to the Rangers. Billy and Adam immediately recognize that the missing painting was used to create this monster.
• The Rangers try to attack the Artist Mole but they pass right through him. He's made of paint or something. Lacking any clear method to harm him, their uncertainty summons Ninjor to the scene. He fares no better.
• As a coup de grace, the Artist Mole sucks the color out of the Rangers. This somehow affects Adam as well, even though he was already black and white.
• At the park, Kim hears her communicator beeping and is able to find it through that. Relieved, she reports in and Zordon briefs her on Artist Mole, who she recognizes immediately. Zordon explains that she must face her fears to overcome him, then delivers some nice platitudes that make her feel better about moving.
• Kim morphs and joins the fight. Artist Mole pretty easily overpowers her, though, because she's just one Ranger and seriously he just took down five. Kim manages to gain the upper hand though and blasts him repeatedly with her sidearm. She doesn't shoot the palette, though, despite being told that doing so would free the other Rangers. It's cool, though, because Artist Mole retreats and it somehow achieves the same result.
• For lack of a better option, Zedd and Rita enlarge Artist Mole. But credit where it's due. He actually got to have a decent fight before they did so.
• The Rangers summon the Ninja Megazord and Ninjor goes into Battle Mode to fight Artist Mole. He barely has time to react before they slaughter him. But again, props for getting a decent fight in the beginning. Zedd and Rita still haven't learned that their monsters fare better on the small scale.
• Back at the Youth Center, the painting is returned despite Bulk and Skull's best efforts, and Kimberly confronts her mom about her concerns with leaving Angel Grove. Aisha comes up with a solution, though, and introduces her parents who've agreed to let Kimberly stay with them for the remainder of the school year.
  • Oh good, this gives her time to find a replacement, since no one cares that they can teleport.

03x09 - Passing the Lantern

• Adam went to a family reunion! He's not going to one, he already went to one. We open on him returning with one of those big barrel-shaped Asian lanterns. …so the lantern here is literal, then. I figured it was a metaphor for Kim choosing a replacement or something. A play on "passing the torch".
• Billy notices an inscription on the lantern but it's written in Korean. He asks Adam what it says, but Adam doesn't know because he's "supposed to discover it for himself". I like how Adam plays this like it's some big mystery quest his family gave him, when what their refusal to translate it really says is, "Learn to speak the f*cking language of your heritage, America Boy." Learning your roots is a big deal to a lot of immigrant families, especially those from Asian cultures.
• Officers Bulk and Skull arrive to shit on Adam's cultural heritage. Bulk makes a xenophobic joke about languages and they almost break the lantern because they're morons. I'm so glad those two are cops.
• Zedd seems to have finally learned to respect Baboo and Squatt's usefulness. He orders them to fetch the lantern - possibly the first time he's ever utilized their talents since he arrived on the moon. Rito invites himself along as well, which I'm nervous about. Baboo and Squatt are kinda a duo. Rito's awesome on his own, but I don't know how well they'll work as a trio.
  • Also, this is clearly another spite scheme. Zedd wants to steal Adam's lantern because it's important to Adam. There's no real causality between it and world domination.
• Billy takes Adam to meet Ko, a wise old man who I believe is Japanese. He talks with Adam about the meaning of lantern inscriptions and reads one of his own. "The dragon you fear is only as potent as your imagination." I'm not going to make fun of this. It's some good wisdom.
• Aisha, Rocky, and Tommy meanwhile are looking for plants for Kimberly's new garden when they run afoul of Bulk and Skull, who've been assigned to patrol the area. Lt. Stone said he was going to put them on permanent parking ticket duty because they're f*ck-ups. How does the universe keep conspiring to get them real jobs?!
• Billy and Adam present Adam's lantern to Ko, who translates it for them. "The lamp may light the path, but the soul must light the way." Adam is still flummoxed, though, because it sounds like gibberish to him. Because he's, like, 16.
• Ko: Have patience. Ancient words do not always reveal themselves right away.
  • Especially when you don't speak their language.
• Ko takes his leave just as the other three approach, and then Tengas attack so the Rangers call on ninja power! Okay, what. Ko just left. He's like five feet away. He can't be out of earshot or line of sight. He is clearly seeing this happen.
• Tommy beats down several Tengas by himself - great job backing him up, Rocky and Aisha - while Adam and Billy decide to perform a double vault. This involves Billy launching Adam into the air and then jumping just as high himself unassisted, meaning his assistance was actually pointless. Also, it's just a way of jumping, so it's not clear what, if anything, it actually contributes. I think they just didn't want Tommy to look like he was doing all the work, so they're faking.
• Baboo and Squatt aren't sure which lantern is the right one because they don't have a scrying telescope or visor and were just listening to Zedd rant about it. So they come up with the plan to grab all the lanterns. That way, they're sure to find the correct one. That's actually fairly sound logic; take 'em all and sort 'em out when you're out of the combat zone.
• The colored ninjas finally begin doing something and it's really dumb. Adam does this handstand bicycle kick thing, Aisha jumps around the Tenga without attacking it much, and Rocky sits on one's head and plucks feathers. It looks awful. I don't know if this is new footage or from Kakuranger, but either way, it's trying way too hard to look generically ninjaesque.
• Once the lanterns are taken, Rito calls off the attack and everyone vanishes. Rito did absolutely nothing in this entire fight. I don't know why he came.
• Adam puts himself down when he realizes the lantern was stolen. Along with all the other ones.
• Adam: I shouldn't have let it out of my sight.
  • I would agree with this, but honestly, the Tengas were a formality anyway. There was no reason to send them. Zedd has repeatedly demonstrated the ability to abduct objects by zapping them with his staff and no-clipping them to the moon. This entire fight was unnecessary, and Adam could never have prevented this.
• Bulk: We'll get back the missing goods but let me make a suggestion. Forget the lantern, come into the 90's. Ever hear of a flashlight?
  • Bulk and Skull are awful for their cultural insensitivity but that was still a funny line.
• For some reason, Rito, Baboo, and Squatt chose the nearby park to sort through the lanterns rather than Bandora Palace. I think Rito's afraid of Zedd seeing them with all the lanterns. Frustrated, Rito throws a lantern at random, it just happens to be Adam's, and Bulk and Skull happen to be walking by in its line of fire.
• While Bulk and Skull try to figure out police protocol on aliens - also a legitimately funny moment - Rito gets frustrated and makes the same call Baboo and Squatt did. Take 'em all, sort it out later. Because it's the right call when you don't know which one is the right one.
• Bulk: Why are we screaming?
• Skull: Because evil aliens are using their magical powers right in front of us.
• Bulk: Oh. (They resume screaming)
  • Okay, these two idiots are on fire today. This is a really good episode for Bulk and Skull.
• At the Command Center, the Rangers deliberate with Zordon over why Zedd would want Adam's lantern. Billy notes that Adam's family did say the lantern possesses great powers. Maybe Zedd's after those. …you know, I would call that really f*cking stupid, but it's not the first time Zedd has mistook metaphorical power for world-conquering superpowers. He struggles with culture clash.
• Zedd: Why did you bring me so many? How am I supposed to know which one has the special powers?!
  • Yep, Zedd thinks Adam's lantern can shoot planet-busting lasers or something.
• Rita examines the lanterns for special powers and then picks the one that seems the most Special Powersy. It's a little red ball lantern. From it, they make the monster Lanterra, while Zedd orders Squatt and Baboo to take the other lanterns back to Earth.
• Lanterra sneaks up on Bulk and Skull to scare them with his scary green teeth. He's a giant lantern with scary teeth. It's gross and hideous all at once. The pair scream, run, and tip off Aisha and Adam to Lanterra's existence so the Rangers morph and move in. Where was your siren on that one, Zordon? Dropping the ball, man.
• Adam: No, wait! Don't attack yet guys, please! Maybe there's some way to stop that monster without destroying it. That lantern is so important to my family. I have to try and save it if I can.
  • Adam is letting fear and self-doubt cloud his judgment. Every time Zedd has made a monster out of a thing, they have always gotten the thing back when it was destroyed. Every time. There's no reason to assume any harm would befall the lantern if Lanterra was killed.
• Rita cheers because she knew Adam's loyalty to the lantern would prevent him from fighting. Zedd tries to say he knew that too, but he didn't. He thought the lantern had magic superpowers. Removing a Ranger or two from the picture and then trying to steamroll the others in their absence is pretty much Rita's M.O.
• Adam: Wait, I've got it. The inscription said it's the soul that lights the way. That means the power's inside ME and not inside that lantern.
  • You're on the right track, Adam. Not quite there, but on the right track. If it gives you the confidence to punch an asshole in the face, I say run with it.
• Adam: The lantern's just an object. It can only remind me of the strength I possess.
  • Now you've got it. The inscription is a reminder that wisdom can be found in a great many things and can be used to advise your course, but ultimately your choices are your own. Heed wise counsel but never forget that you own your destiny. The responsibility is yours.
  • It's basically a fortune cookie that says, "You know fortune cookies don't actually predict the future, right?"
• Oh, I've missed this. The Rangers all attack Lanterra and actually share screentime with him. It's great! They all get smacked down but then Adam uses the wisdom he's received to attack full force. Then he summons a glowing giant fist to super-punch Lanterra. ...did he just bludgeon him with weaponized enlightenment? Because that's awesome.
• Zedd shows remarkable restraint by only growing Lanterra once he seems to be losing the small-scale fight. The Rangers summon the Ninja Megazord and Ninjor shows up out of f*cking nowhere on Kintoun to jump in. That was abrupt.
• Ninjor: Allow me to try!
  • Ninjor proceeds to charge in and get shitstomped. It's great.
• Enraged, Ninjor converts to Battle Mode and blasts Lanterra, while the Megazord does its one thing it does: locking in Tommy's Falconzord and doing a diving double punch that explodes the monster.
  • It's nice that Tommy's Falconzord actually gets used for the final blow, even if it's not part of the main Megazord. He still leads from the Starbucks but now he can perform an epic coffee delivery. He's been promoted from entirely superfluous to Sailor Moon.
• Ninjor: Good work, Power Rangers! The evil lantern is no more!
  • With a single sentence, Ninjor summarizes this entire franchise.
• Later at the Youth Center, Kimberly reveals that she does exist after all! Making her first appearance in the episode - background Pink Ranger shots notwithstanding - she commisserates with Adam over the destruction of his lantern. I guess nobody wanted to embarrass his assumptions by pulling the totally unharmed lantern out of the combat zone and discovering it's the wrong one anyway.
• Adam shows off his growth and development over the course of the episode by acknowledging that the lantern was just a symbol, and not some kind of mystical power core that fuels his bloodline.
• Bulk and Skull insist on following the other Rangers to the Youth Center, then proudly demonstrate that they solved the case! Adam's lantern is returned, safe and sound.
  • Credit where it's due, they did in fact solve the case. It was purely by coincidence but they still had enough wits about them to keep hold of the lantern while panicking and screaming. For Bulk and Skull, that's an accomplishment. This is one of their more legitimately helpful episodes. As I said before, they're on fire today.

It's actually a monkey, not specifically an ape, but close enough.

And yeah, the majority zords are models the same way the D Inozords and Thunderzords are. For actual toys... well wait for the Ultrazord :-P

In the Sentai, this is Ninjaman's powered up form, Samuraiman.

He's more of a non-combining Dragonzord. Incidently, Titanus returns later this season... Looking waaaay cheaper.

edited 1st Dec '16 12:19:00 PM by Ghilz

Not Kakuranger. The Tengas and Ninja Ranger suits are Power Rangers exclusives.

The ninja suits aren't even from Kakuranger?!

...

Okay, I just looked up Kakuranger and I am super jealous of their ninja suits. Those look pretty sweet. Dammit Japan, always kicking our ass at our own attempts to appropriate their culture. How dare Japan do Japan better than America!

edited 1st Dec '16 9:35:39 PM by TobiasDrake

Season 3 has Saban spending a lot of money on original props and fight scenes without Kakuranger and its plethora of B movie ninja vets (and in the case of Kane Kosugi, future B movie ninja vets). Not to mention, this is where parents were really getting in Saban's grill about the violence in PR. Granted Zach Morris was an amoral jerk and probably had the superpower of stopping time but his zany schemes didn't involve roundhouse kicking whoever was staring at Kelly that week. So the fight scenes become really cartoony instead of ninjas kicking each other in the face.

Long story short, it doesn't really work.

03x10 - Wizard for a Day

• We open with Tommy training Billy. Guess he picked up Jason's old job in that regard too. Adam's setting up boards for Billy to try breaking when Rocky comes in with a load of books.
• Rocky's bothered by the Teacher for a Day program, in which a teacher and student trade places for a day. He's been selected so now he has to figure out how to be a teacher. The f*ck is this now? I have never heard of any such class or project or program.
• Rocky's been switched with Mr. Wilton, who we've never seen before but apparently his class is brutal and he's really strict. Rocky's expected to teach his science class somehow. This is the weirdest f*cking school thing I've ever heard of.
• Billy: I don't know, it sounds kind of fun, Rocky.
  • That's because you're Best Student, Billy. You eat academia and fart perfect grades. You've invented countless devices that completely shatter our entire comprehension of physics. Teaching the hardest class in the school would probably be a downgrade for you.
• Mr. Wilton comes in and he's a complete f*cking lunatic. He's Drill Sergeant Nasty for some reason I cannot even begin to fathom. I've had actual Drill Instructors less brutal and offputting than him. Why is this man employed in the education industry?! He's like the worst gym coach stereotype but he's a science teacher for some reason!
• DI Wilton: Remember, in order for this experiment to work, you kids are going to have to treat me JUST as you treat Rocky. IS THAT CLEAR?!
  • This is seriously the creepiest f*cking thing any school has ever done. Why do they have to pretend DI Wilton is a teenager? Why is that part of the assignment?
  • Also, Adam and Billy respond to this with, "Yes, sir! Perfectly clear, sir!" but Tommy adds the hilarious ass-kissing, "I like your tie."
• Rito gets the idea that they should try a switch in Bandora Palace too, and Zedd condescendingly agrees to it. This is going to end in disaster. Rita is naturally dumbfounded at how this dumbf*ck idea actually gained traction. Right there with you, Rita. No one could have anticipated the sheer quantity of rural white voters turning out in the droves they did to support Rito.
• Bulk and Skull are finally on parking detail like they're supposed to be. Bulk thinks it's a test, but it's not. Lt. Stone was very clear about them being on perpetual parking duty on account of being consummate f*ck-ups. I still have no idea how they possibly managed to graduate.
• Desperate for a real assignment, Bulk spots Rocky slipping out of school with teachers' manuals. He assumes that Rocky must be cheating and this is an opportunity for them to strut their cop stuff, but in doing so, he exposes part of the problem with this stupid assignment. If Rocky gets to access all the lesson plans and assignments and shit, what's to stop him from doing exactly that?
  • I mean, Rocky's high moral standards would stop him, but I mean that in general. All a student needs is five minutes alone with a copying machine and he's set for the rest of the semester. This is a really dumb assignment.
• Bulk and Skull break into Rocky's locker and discover the teacher books. They swipe them for evidence, putting Rocky in a difficult position.
• Without his teachers' manuals, Rocky attempts to teach science and winds up creating a volatile concoction that bubbles over onto his desk. Could've been worse.
• DI Wilton is nowhere to be seen, however, because he's in Mrs. Applebee's class ruining the educational experience for the actual kids by knowing all the things already and eagerly answering them. Wait, he's taking all of Rocky's classes?! While Rocky's teaching for the entire day?! That makes negative sense. This assignment keeps getting stupider!
• Rito comes up with a brilliant scheme to destroy the Power Rangers. He'll make a monster! Zedd and Rita share a hearty laugh at his expense. "No wonder he gets the big bucks."
• Rito summons Finster to make a monster but Finster refuses. He only serves Zedd and Rita. And since he has never been tasked with monster making by Zedd, he really just serves Rita. Rito gets frustrated and decides to make his own monster. This should end well.
• Rocky finds DI Wilton moping on a park bench because he was given detention for being disruptive in class. They commisserate over the difficulties of their exchanged roles, and I am still at a loss for what could possibly be accomplished by having a teacher pretend to be a teenager.
• Goldar provides some legitimately useful advice despite trying to tear down Rito. He suggests both attacking Rocky while he's isolated and sending the Tengas to do it since Rito's monster isn't complete. He's an asshole, but a surprisingly useful one today.
• The Tengas fly to the park and promptly ambush DI Wilton, mistaking him for Rocky. Yes. They mistook a middle-aged balding man for Rocky because he was wearing a red shirt. As difficult as it may be to believe, the Tengas may in fact be dumber than Putties.
• Rocky dons his ninja guise and attacks the Tengas, but they refuse to surrender DI Wilton. Two attempt to make off with him while the others keep Rocky busy. They are so committed to DI Wilton being Rocky that they continue abducting him after the Red Ranger physically shows up. I call this confirmation. The Tengas are provably dumber than Putties.
• The Rangers get the message from Zordon that Rocky needs help in the park. They contact Kim, who has conspicuously stopped hanging out with or talking to them since her mom moved to Paris. Clearly the result of whatever drama will lead her to leave the show soon Kimberly missing her mother very badly and unsubtly blaming the rest of the team for trapping her here.
  • You can teleport….
• The fight against the Tengas remains just as stupid as it was before. The ninja action scenes are live-action cartoons, but with less violence.
• Rito shows up to make bold threats to the Rangers, then accidentally transforms DI Wilton into Marvo the Meanie, who is exactly what he seems like: an evil monster science teacher.
• The Rangers once again call out their much less interesting, "[Color] Ranger Power!" invocations as they transform, and I suddenly realize that I may not get to see them screaming brand names when we get to the car show. "FORD!" "CHRYSLER!" "CHEROKEE!" "CHEVROLET!" "HONDA!" "HARLEY DAVIDSONZORD!!!"
• That said, as shitty as the Tenga fights, the monster fight is once again a breath of fresh air with the Rangers actually fighting Marvo.
• Kimberly and Tommy try to restrain Marvo, but he overpowers them. The phantom of DI Wilton appears on his stomach for a brief moment, shouting for help. Why his stomach? Did Marvo eat DI Wilton?
• Marvo uses his chemistry powers to shoot a beam of science that turns Aisha and Billy into beakers of science juice. I have so many questions about that power.
• Rocky: They could be noxious liquids! We'd better cover our faces!
  • YOU ARE WEARING HELMETS!!!
  • The best part is Tommy, Adam, and Kimberly dumbf*ckedly following suit with Rocky and shoving their palms to their faceplates. When we cut back to them a couple seconds later they aren't doing it, presumably because everyone at the same time realized how dumb they were being.
• Marvo fires off another blast of science magic. Tommy pushes Rocky out of the way as he, Kim, and Adam are all turned into beakers of liquid.
• Rito collects the beakers in a carrier. Why is he taking them alive? He should be dumping the contents on the grass. Then he could go home and, against all odds, prove to Zedd and Rita that he DID, in fact, make the moon great again.
• Rocky manages to recover the beakers by running over to Rito and just manhandling them away from him. It's completely effortless. He takes the beakers and teleports back to the Command Center for help.
• Alpha doesn't know how to reverse the Baleful Polymorph on the Rangers. Zordon advises that if Rocky destroys the monster, Mr. Wilton will be returned to normal unharmed. Because of course he will. That's always how destroying Zedd's transformed monsters works, despite Adam's worrying over his family lantern.
• However, Zordon also reveals that if Rocky kills Marvo before the Rangers have been returned to normal, they will remain liquid forever. Um, how exactly do you know this, given that Alpha just said they can't recognize what or how this was done to them?
• Rocky gives Alpha a pep talk, and then they do some science and reverse the transformation. It takes like fifteen seconds. All that worrying about not knowing how to do it was completely pointless.
• Rocky: Bad news, Marvo! We found out that destroying you will actually help Mr. Wilton!
  • Thank you for sharing, angry crow.
• When it appears that the Rangers might actually start attacking Marvo, Rito panics and enlarges him. This gives them the impetus they need to summon the Ninjazords. I'm not clear on why Marvo couldn't just try turning everyone to liquid again. I mean, it's not like they made a vaccine. They just figured out a chemical concoction that could reverse it. They can't do that if everyone's liquid.
• Since Marvo's a one-trick pony, we don't even get a giant-scale fight out of him. The Rangers literally go straight from assembling the Ninja Megazord to the killing drop-punch.
• Rocky: I feel responsible for Mr. Wilton! I'm going after him myself!
  • Rocky ejects from the Megazord with his Ape and slashes Marvo with his sword to finish him off? What? Why was that necessary?! Why is everyone else just like, "Yeah, cool, you go get that vengeance, we'll meet you at Starbucks"?!
• Marvo dies and DI Wilton is left lying on the ground in the wake of his destruction. Because again, that is always how Zedd's monster making powers work. This is not a miraculous outcome. This is business as usual. Adam.
• Later at the Youth Center, DI Wilton has learned that being a teenager is difficult while Rocky's come to respect the amount of work teachers have to do, and I still haven't gotten an answer for why this awful assignment is a thing.
• Bulk and Skull show up to confront Rocky about the stolen books, and DI Wilton Hulks out on them for nearly ruining the experiment.
• Skull: Teacher for a day? Never heard of it!
  • In Bulk and Skull's defense, this assignment is asinine. They couldn't have been expected to know better.

03x11 - Fourth Down and Long

• Rocky's uncle Joe is apparently some bigshot pro quarterback. Rocky's lab partner Alan admires his celebrity and is apparently important enough to have a name and be Rocky's lab partner over one of his Ranger colleagues, so that's a thing.
• Rocky and Alan's project accidentally floods the science room with smoke, so DI Wilton orders everyone to leave the science room. Good job, Rocky. You've invented dry ice!
• Zedd and Goldar are tossing a football around as Finster approaches Rita with a centipede monster. She screams at him that she's done with bugs, but then Zedd fumbles the ball. Finster races to pick it up for him but accidentally bumps into Zedd, dropping his centipede on the football. Zedd's magic accidentally transforms the pair together, and this football centipede monster is born.
  • Jesus, that's a long-winded way to arrive at "Football Centipede Monster". Poor guy. Nobody wants to hear that they're an accident that happened because their creator wasn't paying enough attention and transformed prematurely.
• Zedd: Mmm. Impressive.
  • The half-assed way he says that is glorious. He's just trying to be polite in front of the monster he never wanted.
• The monster lobs his ball to Rito, who is promptly imprisoned inside of it. Goldar makes a pretty funny crack about how he's finally useful, and then Zedd and Goldar play "Ritoball".
• Zedd names the creature Centiback. That's a pretty clever pun, actually. This episode is shaping up to be really good.
• Zedd: Finster! By sheer accident, you've created something you could never have created on purpose!
  • That is HARSH! Yet an accurate assessment of Finster's creations.
• Bulk and Skull drop by to let everyone know they've been assigned to guard Rocky's uncle. How they keep getting real jobs is beyond me.
• With the smoke cleared and kids starting to shuffle back inside the class, Billy corrects Alan's mistake. He read the chemicals backwards. DI Wilton considers this a last straw and is about to request Alan be suspended from the football team until he can improve his grades, but Rocky jumps in to save him by offering to tutor him.
  • What's to tutor? Billy confirmed that his notes were perfect. He just read them wrong. He's probably dyslexic.
• At their first tutoring session, Rocky asks Alan why he struggles so much when he's so smart, and Alan explains that he's just "no good" at school because when he tries to read the things he's written down, the words switch places and shit. Yeah, he's totally dyslexic.
• Rocky: You know what? I bet Uncle Joe could tell you where you're going wrong.
  • Having dyslexia is where he's going wrong. And that's not a thing that he can just not do. Rocky means well, but Alan has an actual learning disability. He's not going to be able to just study that away. He needs more help than a pep talk can provide.
• Bulk and Skull show up to the football field to escort Uncle Joe to his hotel. They also ask his autograph.
• Uncle Joe: Autograph? This is parking violations. I'm not going to sign that.
  • They have him sign the back, but it's hilarious that they offered him a parking ticket to sign in the first place.
• Centiback shows up to the field. Bulk and Skull panic, but Uncle Joe's just curious about it. He's from out of town, so this might be his first monster.
• Centiback tips his hand, revealing his powers by capturing Skull in a football. He then spends several seconds setting up a kick, then nails Bulk as he stands there slackjawed like an idiot. Neither Bulk nor Joe made even the slightest effort to escape.
• Rocky and Alan show up to help Joe, and Centiback once again shows off his power by transforming Alan. So by now, Rocky should have a very clear idea of what he can do.
• Rocky gapes at Alan and doesn't even try to flee or pay attention to his surroundings, so Uncle Joe has to sacrifice himself to a football to protect him. Good news is, this gets the civilians out of the way so Rocky can morph.
• Rocky tries fighting Centiback, but he just gets his ass kicked. Centiback shrugs off everything Rocky throws at him. Rocky calls for backup and Zordon sends the other Rangers to join him. Rocky weakly warns them to avoid the balls.
• Zedd sends the Tengas to even the odds and the Rangers have an actual football game.
• Tenga throws a pass and Centiback bulldozes through each of the Rangers to catch it. Then he nails Tommy right in the crest, which causes him to explode just like Zedd's Putties become a football.
• With the Tengas restraining them, Centiback manages to nail Billy, Kimberly, and Adam with his doomball. He gets Aisha shortly after, but hers is more embarrassing because she's not wrestling with any Tengas. She just stands there and takes a football to the face.
• Now on his own, Rocky teleports to the Command Center. There, he comes up with the plan that if they can turn the football's energy waves upside-down and then backwards, it would change the Rangers back to normal. …that's some really shitty technobabble right there.
• Alpha develops buckets that will reverse the energy field of the footballs if they can be dumped in them. Zordon also contacts Ninjor for help, and he and Rocky head to the mountains where Centiback is waiting with the footballs. Also, a snowstorm is moving in because reasons.
• Nope, I had that wrong. Rocky catches the evil football in the bucket, which reverses its energy field. Then he chucks it at the balls lined up on the ground, reversing the spell on them and setting free the civilians.
• Alpha teleports the civilians back to the safety of the football field while Centiback fails to learn his lesson and kicks the ball at Rocky and Ninjor again. Ninjor repeats Rocky's catch and throw maneuver and the Rangers are released from their spell.
• Rita and Zedd grow Centiback and the Rangers form the Ninja Megazord as they do. Ninjor and the Megazord double-team Centiback and with a variety of blows, they're able to destroy him. The Falconzord never enters the mix, so Tommy must be at the Starbucks again. Or he might be at King Soopers this time, picking up the victory Gatorades.
• At the Youth Center later, Kimberly shows up for her one scene. Rocky shows up to deliver the good news: Alan doesn't have to quit the team.
• Joe: I told Mr. Haley about my problems in school and he did the rest.
  • Uh, you want to clarify what "did the rest" means? Because he's just a well-known football player, and you're making it sound like he pulled some strings to make your grades stop mattering or something.
• Lt. Stone shows up to criticize Bulk and Skull for not going to the football field. They scream and practically wet themselves when they see he's holding a football, but it's played for laughs because PTSD was considered funny in the 90's.
• Lt. Stone: It's the last time that you'll EVER receive celebrity duty!
  • Why did they receive celebrity duty in the first place?! I still haven't gotten an answer for that.
• Stone lobs the football to them and they freak out and slapstick themselves. It's all played for the typical Bulk and Skull slapstick laughs but it's just uncomfortable this time, because it's making fun of PTSD.
• Once that unpleasant display is over, Joe finally clarifies what he did for Alan. He took him to the learning center where he was diagnosed with dyslexia. So now DI Wilton's cutting him some slack and says he knows some ways to help him learn, and Alan doesn't have to quit the football team. Hooray!

03x12 - Stop the Hate Master, Part I

• I could totally make a Trump joke right now but this season's just making them too easy.
• Holy crap, we actually get to see Kimberly at the start of the episode. And she's interacting with other Rangers!
• Kim and Aisha open up the episode checking a tryouts board for something they tried out for. Kimberly made the team, Aisha didn't. Kim insists it must be a mistake and wants to talk to some gal named Veronica about it, but Aisha says it's not important and sulks off.
• I think the club is called "Angel Girls"? In any case, Veronica comes over to chat up Kim and Kim asks about Aisha, but Veronica says she didn't have the right "qualifications". Oh, I think I know where this is going. This is a racism episode, isn't it?
• Aisha's predicament gives Zedd an idea. He wants Finster to make a hate monster. Oh, f*ck. This is a racism episode, isn't it?
• Meanwhile, the boys are helping Ernie clean up graffiti. Tommy remarks that he'd love to learn who keeps tagging the Youth Center, to which Bulk emerges from his typical creepy stalking with an idea.
• Skull, even creepier, is hiding under a table at the Angel Girls meeting. That's…I can't even…you are a cop. You can't keep doing these things. I mean, it's in the Youth Center and there's tons of people just traipsing around because it's just the lobby, but if anything, that only makes his decision to hide under a table even skeevier.
• Kim confronts Veronica to find out what she meant about Aisha's qualifications, and Aisha makes several loaded dogwhistle statements about Aisha's background. Kim gets offended on Aisha's behalf. Veronica insists that Kim's got automatic access because her mother was a member, but Kim responds that her mother wouldn't want anything to do with a group like this and quits.
• Finster: Take these magical seeds of hate which I have extracted from every monster I have created and simply toss them to Earth.
  • The sheer bullshit-to-word ratio of that sentence is truly a marvel to behold. Well done, Finster. Well f*cking done.
• Zedd and Rita cast the seeds to Earth and then recite a rhyming incantation to empower them. The seeds grow into an especially atrocious monster who dances and raps. Yep, another rapping bastard.
  • This monster is meant to embody hate and he truly does a remarkable job of it. Before he's even finished his second rhyme, I have grown to despise him like I have hated few things in this life. Mission accomplished. Now go die in a fire.
• Kim breaks the news to Aisha but she seems to have actually bought the, "family isn't rich enough" line. Either that or I may have misinterpreted the line's intent. Appealing to economic status is a popular dogwhistle for racism and remains so to this day due to the association of low-class = minority. But the show might be trying to make it literally about her family's wealth.
• Kim tells Aisha that she quit the club because people who judge others ''no matter what the reason" is totally uncool. She then gives Aisha a hug and reminds her that her real friends love and accept her for who she is. …this still feels like it's about race, not her parents' income. I think they might just be trying to avoid actually saying it.
• Zedd explains that Hate Master will spread hate dust to destroy the world. And that would probably be why they're trying to avoid saying it. As much as this show tries really hard to be progressive, Very Special Episodes have a reputation for a reason, because it's hard to give a serious, mature look at complex issues while also being a superhero show. You wind up with shit like a rapping douchebag who spreads hate dust.
• Zedd sends the Tengas to attack the Rangers in the park. They summon their ninja powers and, as usual, I wish the transformation stopped halfway through because they look so much cooler without the full masks.
• And also as usual, the Tenga fight is a complete joke. At one point, Billy and Adam teleport underground so they can reach up and grab the Tengas legs, zombie style. Also, if they do any more cartwheels I'm pretty sure they're going to die of overdose. I miss the actual martial arts of the Putty fights so much. And the much cooler music.
• Tommy and Kimberly asspull yet another new ninja power, in which Kim gets on Tommy's shoulders and they combine their shooty gun fingers to fire lasers. The lasers swirl an awful lot in the wind, however, which is really conspicuous. I swear, the shit that happens in these ninja sequences is exactly the kind of thing I'd expect from another show half-assedly parodying Power Rangers.
• Aisha talks to her grandmother about the club. Her grandma offers the sage wisdom, "Do you really want to be part of something that treats people that way?" Then she gives an uplifting talk about not letting small-minded folks get you down and being strong in the face of adversity.
• Aisha's grandmother gives her what seems to be a broach shaped like a heart made of ruby with gold trim. It's been in the family for generations, she explains. Wonder how Aisha's mom feels about being skipped?
• Squatt, competent as he is, manages to collect hate dust from the very battlefield the Rangers are fighting Tengas on without a single person intervening. He delivers it to Hate Master, who turns it against the Rangers.
• Hate Master swirls his hate particles as the Rangers struggle to resist it. Rocky seems to be having a harder time than the others, thrashing about while everyone else just plugs their ears and cringes in pain. To ensure maximum hate, Hate Master raps through the entire thing, creating more and more hate with each awful rhyme. It's awful, but it works. The hate sets in and the Rangers turn on each other.
• Now victorious, Rita and Zedd celebrate by growing Hate Master. Um. Why was that necessary? He'd won.
• He's not grown five seconds before he busts another rhyme and I instantly understand the scheme. By being giant size, his rap will carry farther, inspiring hate from a wider swath of people.
• At Zordon's urging, Aisha teleports to the field to try and convince everyone to break out of the hate spell using logic. This goes as well as you'd expect.
• Despite Aisha's complete failure, the spell abruptly wears off and everyone is set free by time. So Aisha didn't need to leave her grandma after all. I'm sure she feels great about that.
• Since Zedd and Rita already did the courtesy of growing the monster, the Rangers morph and summon their Ninjazords. This shouldn't take long. He's a one-trick pony.
• With the Zords assembling on his position, Hate Master uses his one trick and, surprisingly, it still works through the Zords. He infects each Ranger with more hate particles. Except Aisha, who no longer has an excuse for why she's unaffected.
• The Rangers each bail out of their Zords and demorph. Aisha does as well, as she desperately tries to convince the others to stop being assholes.
• Aisha: Now, I don't understand why I'm unaffected by this, but—
  • No buts. That's the important bit. Why and how are you unaffected? Last time, you were spared by virtue of just not being present, but you don't have that this time. What the hell, Aisha?
• Infected by Hate Master, the Rangers return to the Command Center to belligerently shout at Zordon and quit. They would much prefer Zedd destroy the world to ever being Power Rangers again. Hate is nothing if not short-sighted.
• Zordon asks Alpha to scan Aisha and find out why she's immune to hate. It's because she's black, isn't it? In the 90's, we believed only whites and Asians - since they're the "quasi-white" minority - could hate. In any case, Aisha asks what will happen if they can't synthesize a cure.
• Zordon: Then eventually the Power Rangers will turn their power on each other and destroy themselves. All of us, everyone on Earth, will then be at the mercy of Zedd and Rita.
  • No pressure!

How did Bulk and Skull even get into the police academy while they were still high school teens?

It's Hand Waved as this junior police program that Angel Grove High is hosting.

EDIT: Also, I really miss Jason and Zack. Rocky and Adam don't quite have the same force of personality those two had. I mean, Jason was bland but there was still a clear and concise impression of who he was and what he enjoyed doing. And Zack threatened to drown you in his personality on a regular basis.

Jason was the karate guy whose episodes consistently revolved around the classes he teaches. Zack was the dance fighter who self-sabotaged trying to hit on women. Billy was the science bro who needed help learning to fight. Kimberly was the gymnast who brought a more acrobatic flair to her style. Rocky and Adam just feel shallower by comparison, because they don't have very many really distinct traits. They're just generically good guys.

Aisha is loads better than Trini though, on account of actually having a personality and being the focus of the episode from time to time. Trini was just sort of a backup dancer to the rest of the team.

edited 5th Dec '16 8:43:33 AM by TobiasDrake

The Red reunion (not to be confused with the Red Wedding unless you want to traumatize someone) shows how important Rocky was...by not including him. Not even in the original script where he was supposed to cameo as Tommy's butler. Seriously.

I dunno, I would have went "screw the Alien Rangers, they're really, REALLY lame (as you will soon see) and make Rocky Ninja Red because ninjas are a thousand times cooler than water addicted aliens." But it really puts his memorability in perspective.

To be fair, the issue with including Rocky in Forever red is what morph do you give him? He can't be in the Red MMPR suit coz that'll be confusing. And his other costumes are not red rangers, so you'd be "Forever Red and one Blue"

Or you give Rocky a morph he's never had, which isn't much better

edited 5th Dec '16 9:58:25 AM by Ghilz

I would have went "Your ninja powers gave you this suit, now you're Sasuke. Go do...ninja stuff."

All things considered, he doesn't get much better as a character.

Eitherway, they couldn't find Steve Cardenas when they filmed Forever Red (he had just moved), so the discussion is pointless. Even if they would've had a suit for him

True. Either way he doesn't leave an impression this season.

He never did. and I think that sort of what was the point. Since they wanted Tommy to be team leader, I think they purposely wrote the new Red Ranger to sort of meld in the background, to contrast with the previous Red Ranger who had been team leader.

This monster is meant to embody hate and he truly does a remarkable job of it. Before he's even finished his second rhyme, I have grown to despise him like I have hated few things in this life. Mission accomplished. Now go die in a fire.

I warned ya back in the Pumpkin Rapper review. As bad as he was, Hate Master is so much worse.

I seriously want to know who thought making Rocky into Tommy's butler was a good idea. Between that and how he got replaced I wonder if someone in the writer's room really hated him.

I'd say Adam's kind of taken Billy's previous role as the shy one of the team without being the brains while Rocky is more of the team joker like Zack.

edited 5th Dec '16 12:29:59 PM by windleopard

I wonder if season 3 finally got the better of Tobias Drake :-P

It does make the least amount of sense.

Honestly I would skip to Zeo.

I wouldn't, since there's some build up TO zeo in season 3. I mean, it's not great...

Nah. Life got the better of Tobias Drake. My office closed down so I'm on the job trail AND I have to find a new home. The two are not related; they simply happened concurrently. And also I'm the best man in a friend's wedding so that's happening too.

This is a hiatus. Not just from Power Rangers; I also have less time to post on the forum in general now. I plan to return in full once life settles down a bit.

edited 9th Dec '16 6:30:54 AM by TobiasDrake

Sounds like a full plate. Hopefully everything works out for you.

Well, I guess now is as good a time as any to look at Saban's fight choreography in the early era. This one is good - The first encounter with the Cogs.

Zeo starts with the Cogs...looking like they're scouting an area for a picnic. Ohranger starts with...a city being attacked (and some hilariously fake green screen). Enjoy.

People make fun of Kalishsplosions but the choreography is leagues ahead of where it was.

edited 9th Dec '16 6:47:46 AM by Beatman1

An interview on the Justice League crossover.

Zordon: "Value them and protect them as you did your morphers and your power coins. Until we the next season were you can just toss them into the garbage and never mention them again."

For it's faults, Megaforce did a better job of explaining why the new powers were needed.

What was the theme of Ohranger exactly?

Ancient Civilization(s) (Think Atlantis or the ancients from Stargate). Symbols, Kings. It's all over the place.

It's sort of convoluted. Ohranger was meant to be an anniversary with a super serious plot, but the Sarin attacks in the Tokyo subway and the Great Hanshin Earthquake put the kaybosh on that.

Basically the plot is that long ago there wan an ancient civilization (like, older than the dino people of Zyuranger) who created the plot to Terminator. The ancient humans were saved by a hero called the King Ranger (Literally what Ohranger means), and the machines banished in space. In the present, Japanese scientists have unearthed the Technology that gave the King Ranger his powers, creating new rangers. Which is good coz the robots are back. And later they unearth the Kingranger himself in stasis (Who is, again, a fucking kid who turns into an adult, though King Ranger is less annoying) who joins the team.

The series has a lot nods to earlier sentai (The mentor, for example, is the actor who played the original Blue Ranger of the first Sentai (Aorenger) and the First Sixth Ranger (Big One, from JACKQ)) But the re-writes and weird tone shift are obvious, so it's generally regarded poorly. In a recent poll is came in 5th as the lowest rated series, just edging out Koryuger (Dino Charge), Go-buster, Toqger & Nininger (Ninja Steel) (Yeah, the recent Sentai are not doing well in Japan).

edited 9th Dec '16 10:35:28 AM by Ghilz

Zeo was interesting for how relatively easy it was to create new Rangers using a good enough power source. The white ranger was a personal creation of Zordon and Alpha and was shown to be labor intensive, but no explanation given what was powering it. That's one of the problems with Turbo as the source of the powers were never explained, especially since the Zeo crystal was said to be extremely powerful and continually growing in strength. Fan theories suggested the Zeo crystals powered the Turbo powers as well, it was just the costumes and equipment that were upgrades (helped that it had the exact same color set-up and the morphers were mildly similar wrist devices). But that theory went out the window when both Zeo Ranger V and Red Turbo Ranger were seen in "Forever Red."

In Space had the biggest hand wave for where the new powers came from, morphers were just passed out matching the seeming solitary Red Ranger. The seasons using organizations with near unlimited resources (Lightspeed Rescue and Operation Overdrive) don't really explain why they stop at 5 or 6 Rangers when three times as many would be just as helpful. SPD did a clever move by explaining that there are more Rangers and we are just following the B squad, but it's always better when it's a rare power source or built on ancient tradition.