If you could, what would you say to a critic?

Let's face it, critics are human like the rest of us, and opinions are a dime a dozen. The big difference is that critics get paid for their opinions.

Still, I'm not sure that a lot of stock should be put into critics. I mean, I have a book titled Harry, A History, and one critic said before the release of Harry Potter:

• "Parents and godparents who wander into children's book departments or bookshops in search of Christmas presents can be forgiven for feeling at a loss. Unfamiliar titles line the walls. Those formerly reliable volumes of fairy tale are now lurid cartoons in which the princess saves the prince, and the frog has to get fair species recognition in a sage-green eco-home."

If I could, I would say to her, "Ahem. I believe The Little Mermaid and My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic would like to have a word with you."

Oh, yes, then there's this one critic who gave an unfavourable review of The Casual Vacancy, comparing it to Harry Potter and saying:

• "We do not come away feeling that we know the back stories of the 'Vacancy' characters in intimate detail the way we did with Harry and his friends and enemies, nor do we finish the novel with a visceral knowledge of how their pasts — and their families’ pasts — have informed their present lives."

If I could, I would say to her, "You can't compare The Casual Vacancy to Harry Potter because they're too different. It's unfair to judge a book by the standards of another book."

Isn't there a critic out there that you would like to say something to?

Roger Ebert, you can't find a single redeeming factor about North?

edited 27th Dec '12 3:41:54 PM by 0dd1

Hey, you're talking about 'before Harry Potter was released'. Friendship Is Magic wasn't even on the horizon back then.

Anyway, your sig is awesome. I actually once wrote lyrics for a pony anthem set to "O Canada".

Armond White: YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, I HATE YOU YOU SUCK AND EVERYTHING YOU REPRESENT, YOU'RE NOTHING BUT A PLAGUE UPON THIS COUNTRY!

Thank you, Screwattack, for that quote.

Critical responses to "The Hobbit" have made me want to educate quite a few people on the fact that following the source material to the letter is not what makes a good adaptation. Instead, respecting and translating the original story into a film that can stand on its own merits is of primary importance. That said, I quite enjoyed The Hobbit, but too many of its critics seem to be preoccupied with "This was/wasn't in the book!!!"

On a related note, 3-D and HFR and similar technologies aren't good or bad in and of themselves; it is how they're used by filmmakers that matters. Fortunately Ebert seems to be coming around on this point.

I love you, Yahtzee. Keep up the good work.

Also, there is a good thing about North? :V

@ Midnight Rambler: That's very kind of you. I wondered if anyone even noticed how I modelled my sig line after one of the "O Canada" lines!

True, MLPFIM didn't exist before the release of Harry Potter, and I guess timing can change the impact of comments.

Still, I'll admit that critics do make good points from time to time, like this bit from Wikipedia about the Revenge Of The Sith:

• Much of the criticism for the film was directed towards the dialogue, particularly the film's romantic scenes, and for Hayden Christensen's performance (which won him his second Golden Raspberry Award for Worst Supporting Actor). Critics and fans alike were quick to jump on such lines as "Hold me, Ani. Hold me, like you did by the lake on Naboo...where there was nothing but our love...." Critics have claimed this demonstrated Lucas' weakness as a writer of dialogue, a subject with which Lucas openly agreed when receiving the Lifetime Achievement Award from the American Film Institute.

If George Lucas agreed with the critics, then they were obviously on the mark!

"Dude, I'm so sorry you chose a job that is essentially voicing your opinion and your knowledge and being screamed by people who can't stand contradiction. Wanna go and drink a few cold ones to get rid of the after-taste?"

Contradictions make the world go round. :3

Seriously. :o Quantum Mechanics are weird. @-@

@ kay4today: Sure, that at the end of North, the whole thing was revealed to be All Just a Dream. I know that trope gets booed at a lot, but sometimes it can be such a good thing!

If I met a critic, I'd say:

'I feel bad for you, man, having to watch shit films for a living. Did you never think of getting a real job?'

Eh, critics don't only watch shit films.

No, but they have to watch many, many films and that means sitting through an awful lot of shit films that anyone who wasn't a critic could just avoid.

But it's worth it, apparently! I mean, they live from watching movies! That's like a dream come true to some people! XDD

Ugh. Can you imagine? Having to sit through every damned soulless rom-com or impenetrable art house snooze-fest or every plotless Michael Bay explodathon?

There are people who do that for fun. Myself included. So yes

That's the cynical view of what a critic does. I don't deny that Michael Bay gets a lot of criticism, but I don't think he's terrible. I enjoyed the Transformers movie he directed. Besides, the word "worst" can get debatable when applying it to people. Why, Bay delivered a pretty big "The Reason You Suck" Speech about Uwe Boll, a guy whose name is proudly displayed in the Permanent Red Link Club.

Man, of all the things that make me sad of being a critic, writing two page essays on why this or that movie is awful and make a living out of it is hardly even there.

Not only that, but you still get to choose your material. It's just that it's incredibly easier to write about shit-movies. Not only that, but they're even enjoyable on their own right, most of the time.

I'd like to tell a critic "fuck you, jackoff, fuck you. Let's see you do better."

They can't.

Of course they can't. That's why they criticize.

That depends on the critic and the movie in question I think. :p

Either way, I'd say Let's See YOU Do Better! is a fallacy. One can appreciate all the work that goes into something while still criticizing the final product.

edited 29th Dec '12 8:08:47 PM by 0dd1

The thing about Let's See YOU Do Better! is that it's simply put, utter bullshit.

Like, let's say I cook you a pizza and I burn it. You may be a shit chef yourself who would burn a bowl of cereal, but that doesn't change the fact that I burnt my pizza and thus created a bad product.

edited 29th Dec '12 8:11:52 PM by MillerCross