Just awesome like that
Well, if it's affecting your quality of life, then you outright need to seek psychological help. That's pretty much the only way to overcome it. Simply avoiding everything gaming related, especially if you frequent the internet, just isn't possible.
Insert witty and clever quip here. My page, as the database hates my handle.
Tangential, but I'm actually curious about why you want the attention of any gaming community at all.
![[up]](https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/smiles/arrow_up.png "[up]"){kind=icon}
Friends. I took up online gaming in 2009 as a way to become less isolated from the world. The game I used to start this off was Mario Kart Wii. Due to the whole "friend lists" thing going on ina forum I'd visit regularly, I started one too, but I back then had to realize the hard way that no one would want to add a random person just because they asked. And so began my "quest for attention", so to speak. There originated my idea of "if you want to catch the attention of that community, you must be exceptional". While it was kinda under control back then, mostly due to the aid of Skype, it probably ingrained itself deep into my mind silently, and without Skype to distract me an obssession was allowed to bloom.
Going to have to third the "see a psychologist" suggestion - there seems to be a worse problem hidden here.
I suppose just telling you that you don't have to be amazing to get friends won't help.
edited 6th Dec '12 1:51:35 PM by burnpsy
Folks, it got worse.
[00:01:44] Gabriel Pereira: I actually used to enjoy playing video games (and, as a matter of fact, still enjoy talking about them) but I withdrew from them because I couldn't withstand the level of pressure I was subjecting myself to in every game I played.
[00:02:12] Antimatter625: Not what you -used- to enjoy. What do you still enjoy?
[00:04:51 | Editado 00:05:12] Gabriel Pereira: I don't think there's much else, actually. I can only think of listening to music (but even that has a caveat - perhaps due to my tainted memories of the video games, I sometimes find myself abruptly stopping listening to a Touhou song I know I like due to an influx of thoughts over the games; I pretty much have to be trying to go this far, though) and watching movies (but they must be in a theater, else my attention drifts)
[00:05:32] Antimatter625: I see.
[00:05:51] Antimatter625: Well, I suppose first step is to find something you enjoy.
[00:08:07] Gabriel Pereira: There's also random You Tube comedy (like random TF 2 videos or Tourettes Guy, as I showed you a long time ago) but even that I've put off for a bit because they were making me feel like a shallow, immature person who laughs at profanity. You're probably right, I need to find something I can enjoy without guilt. Or maybe seek psychological help, because my current thought patterns probably aren't being good for my mental health.
[00:08:29] Antimatter625: These are all things it would be good to tell your psychiatrist.
[00:09:48] Gabriel Pereira: I think it's too late now. Other than that...I think you better be trying to solve that compulsion to compare yourself to others, or you won't be able to enjoy EVERYTHING ELSE! Hell, I can't even think of one thing on Earth that you can't compare it to what others does! It has gotten to this point onyhow mentioned.
[00:12:04] Antimatter625: You may also be having a bit of difficulty at this moment because of the late hour. But we've both known for a while that that mindset is unhealthy.
[00:15:19 | Editado 00:15:24] Gabriel Pereira: So it is, thus making my current objective finding a way to enjoy things guilt-free, worry-free; basically, digging myself out of this hole I buried myself in.
[00:15:48] Antimatter625: Even simply finding a thing you enjoy would a good start.
edited 6th Dec '12 6:44:21 PM by AngelG55th
If you're having trouble with things you know you'd enjoy, try something you don't know anything about. Worst case scenario, you don't like it; best case, you find something new to like that you don't feel guilty about.
-Nudge-
sounds about right... the way I think of it as doing something because you want to do it, rather than doing something because it'll make you feel better, or doing something because you had to.
not game related, but just... generally.
Add me on skype! Dynamod1990
Does the need for attention also apply to your real-life, in-person friends?
I only ask because you don't mention them (or haven't mentioned them in a notable capacity in this thread).
I really should add that at this point I've decided to take a new direction in my life. The reason I took video games far too seriously was because I did little else. The way to fix that was by finding other things of interest, as a way to sideline video games and curb their importance in my life. (I think this went unseen, but at one point my avatar + title in this forum made an allusion to suicide
◊, and it shocked everybody close to me out of their wits)
In a nutshell, I'm learning how to live all over again.
How close are the ones you have? Are they aware of your situation?
-Nudge-
You know, this was pretty off topic either way, I think I'll just edit it out. no use
edited 10th Dec '12 1:33:03 PM by Dynamod
Add me on skype! Dynamod1990
The real life friends that are not family that I currently have are more like classmates, so I haven't really delved into detail with them over my current predicament. The closest friends I have are all virtual... x_x
Which brings me to one more issue I need to fix: find something I find pleasurable to do that involves the participation of other live people.
edited 10th Dec '12 2:19:35 PM by AngelG55th
I was going to recommend something of the sort, certainly. Some of my closest friends are my former classmates, so there's definitely that.
That being said, family also should be a support group (whether or not it is your first choice would depend on how close you are to them).
Particularly damaging to my self-esteem would be reading up or watching the achievements of challenge gamers (one even frequents this very forum - Poochy.EXE). I'm not too sure if it's because I really want to attain a level of proficiency in video games like they have, or if I simply cannot accept myself for who I am (such as my limitations and my set of skills), but I've began to see such players as if they were superhuman, like they belonged to some kind of superior species, born to conquer and to win (while at the same time berating myself, thinking I belong to an inferior species, bred to be enslaved). Yes, this line of thought is totally bonkers, but I can assure you that this is the caliber of the things that swirl about my mind.
I'm going to ask, yet again: how can I cope with this? It's really affecting my quality of life.
edited 6th Dec '12 12:34:24 PM by AngelG55th