Is it seen as a bad thing for guys to turn down sex?

Yeah but the word is overused by social commentators to the point of cliche. There is online thesaurus, use it.

edited 4th Apr '12 3:19:44 PM by joeyjojo

Oh don't pretend you were just doing it for lingual sake. What you meant was that you don't think people should get critisized for entitlement issues, even if that is an existing thing. It comes off as "don't quuestion my feelings of entitlement!"

While we're on that subject (Iaculus will know what I mean): Is it so difficult to say 'women' instead of 'females'? 'Females' makes me think of animal husbandry or something. Even more so when it says 'avaible females', that nearly sounds dehumanizing/objectifying.

Why Octo, I never knew you were a mind reader

edited 4th Apr '12 3:36:42 PM by joeyjojo

Alright, know that off. A semantics derail about entitlement isn't really needed here.

I don't know, what about that lacrosse case where the accused were tried and executed by the media for the crime of being 'entitled frat boys'.

Well, it's on topic if you can establish how it's on topic. Did it have anything to do with guys turning down sex?

This case? Yeah, just violent burglary, assault and murder over a break-up, totally just the media...

They couldn't be innocent because that would involve men passing up sex?

no this one[1]

edited 4th Apr '12 4:11:49 PM by joeyjojo

I looked into that case (hadn't heard of it before or maybe I didn't remember it, but anyway,) I don't really see how it relates to the thread.

I mean, that one would be more like men passing up rape, so it's not the scenario that we're talking about here (which is that a person that a man finds attractive offers the man sex and the man refuses.)

I don't get it. If a guy turns down sex, so be it. I don't see how it would be other people's business or a bad thing.

Yeah, I agree, and that attitude is how things should be. Unfortunately, that's not always so. Which means that your thread hopping first post is not quite correct...

Is it seen as unusual? Certainly. Does that mean it's looked down upon? Not really, no. When I've seen it happen, the worst reaction was just "C'mon, she was hot!".

So, no, at most, people might think you're gay, but then they ask, you say no, life goes on.

edited 4th Apr '12 8:35:12 PM by AStrayBard

Those guys view anyone with an even marginally different lifestyle as gay, though.

thread hop

Okay, since some of my posts were a little misunderstood I'm going to make an attempt at clarifying.

No, I was not trying to look down on anyone by saying that "until you've had good sex you don't know what you're missing". You don't, but if you have some and then decide "eh, not for me", that's your call.

Case in point; I don't like anime. I never have, and I probably never will. When I make this statement to fans of the genre, they always tell me the same thing I'm saying; that if I'd seen 'the good shit' I wouldn't feel that way. So I went out and watched some. I took recommendations from people who were fans. Hell, I even joined the local anime club and watched what they were showing every week for about six months. And after doing all of this, none of what I was shown rated more than "meh" in my book. There were examples I didn't hate, but nothing I'd go out of my way to watch a second time. *

Now, I don't think anime is stupid, or that people who like it are wasting their time, just that for me it is not something I want to spend time consuming. But the point here is that I went out and tried it, so I can speak with authority on the matter of it being something I do not like, and I feel as though I consumed enough of it to make this judgment for myself.

But until I made the step of trying it for myself, I could not speak with such authority.

Someone who has personally experienced something is more knowledgeable on it than someone who has not. This is a fact, but one that does not come with a value judgment attached. It does not make those who have not personally experienced it "lesser", it just makes them slightly more ignorant. And in some cases, the risk is not worth the reward; I am not as knowledgeable on the ins and outs of heroin as someone who has spent time easing spikes into their arm would be, but I'd like to think that's okay.

Which brings me to the next point. Sex carries with it a certain amount of intrinsic risk, and if you have decided that the risk is not worth the knowledge gained, that is certainly a reasonable conclusion to make. AIDS kills, kids are forever and getting your heart broken is really unpleasant.

But until you decide to take that plunge, you are slightly less knowledgeable than those who have and that's just the way it is. I'm not judging you for your lack of knowledge, and I don't think the likes of Barkey or Martello are either; both of them have expressed what I also know, that that's the fact that sex and love are always risky business. But kindly admit that those that have been there and done it know more about it than you who have not. We've already admitted that abstaining is probably the safer course.

If those of you who say sex ain't no thing finally end up in a night of passion with someone you care deeply for and come away from the experience saying "nice for some, not my thing", fine. However, I hope you'll forgive me if I don't lay any money on that being the outcome.

As to the topic...TL;DR

• Knowledge always has a price; you play, you pay, you learn. There's really no other way.
• Does society see turning down sex as a bad thing for guys to do? Yes and no.
• Is it? You figure it out. You're the one who has to live with the result.
• Do I? Why the fuck do you care what I think?

edited 5th Apr '12 12:28:01 AM by drunkscriblerian

I feel this thread is destined to repeat itself over and over. I really don't have anything more to add, except:

Sex is awesome. Enjoy it while you can.

That's it. I rest my case.

Oh, it has.

Will it go round in circles? / Will it fly high like a bird up in the sky?

This is an interesting read and was a response to this Cracked article, which to me sounds a lot like some of the arguments being thrown around here.