Did I let this girl off too easily?

The facts in brief:

- Actively tries to create as much death and misery as possible.

- Ethnically cleansed the world of an entire Fremen-like race.

- Assists in the summary execution of a group of Magical Girls whose only crime was trying to defend themselves and their younger, weaker peers.

- Attempts to use an ancient superweapon to slaughter every Magical Girl on the planet. Ultimately has an epiphany where she realizes her commander's (the story's Big Bad) plan of killing all of the world's protectors and then basically enslaving the defenseless populace might be a bad idea. Sacrifices herself to stop him.

- It's implied she lives happily ever after in heaven with her dead husbando, who she was basically trying to avenge the entire time (the Big Bad manipulated her grief into RAAAAAGE to get her to do all of the aforementioned things, you see). That or she's just crazy and imagined seeing his ghost a second before she martyred herself.

- My defense: "Darth Vader blew up a planet."

So, what do you think? Does this make her a total Mary Sue, or is she a fairly balanced villain protagonist who pays her dues?

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I don't see why she'd be a Mary Sue at all. Karma Houdini, probably, but that's not necessarily a bad thing. It all depends on whether all the character development follows naturally and makes sense. Also, she sounds fairly insane from your description, but it'll depend on how you portray that.

Most readers will probably consider her to have gotten off too easily — even I, despite not believing in karma or retributive justice, feel on an emotional level that she doesn't deserve a good afterlife. Just make sure not to downplay her crimes, which from your description are quite terrible, on par with Hitler or Stalin.

Also, make sure the afterlife is consistent. Are the gods (or whoever) normally very lenient with forgiveness, no matter what crimes someone's committed?

edited 18th Nov '11 12:59:36 PM by Enthryn

That was the intended effect.

There is no afterlife story arc. Just "oh hey he forgives me *kaboom*."

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Oh, the afterlife bit is fine, then, if it's ambiguous like that. I'd just read that as her dying thoughts and nothing more. Then it's just a matter of making sure other people don't forgive her too easily.

edited 18th Nov '11 1:10:48 PM by Enthryn

Nope. The only living person who's sympathetic for her is the person who understood what she was going through from firsthand experience and coerced her into having the aforementioned epiphany. She's regarded as a Whore of Babylon-type figure by everyone else.

edited 18th Nov '11 1:31:43 PM by Dragonzordasaurus

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I don't see the problem here. She's already dead in her personal "happy ending" so I don't see how that makes her a karma houdini.

"I'll show you fear, there is no hell, only darkness." My twitter

He's worried that she's a Karma Houdini because she got a "happy ending".

I think — since I was okay with the ending of the original Star Wars trilogy, and your Darth Vader comparison was pretty spot-on (aside from the fact that it was Tarkin that actually blew up the planet) — that you're okay here. She's basically someone who was manipulated into being evil, rather than a full-fledged villain, and as long as the good in her resurfaces in some meaningful way (and I think foiling the Big Bad's plan — bonus points if she kills him, too — counts as pretty damn meaningful) before her death, it's okay to make her death a little happy. She does still need to die, but you've already got that covered.

Jesus saves. Gretzky steals, he scores!

I never really understood the whole "Well Tarkin technically issued the order" thing, as if making that distinction makes any difference in the overall scheme and Vader wouldn't have done the same thing in his position. Vader stood there watching him do it without a hint of remorse, and he had no problems with it after the deed was done.

And even if you wanted to speculate Vader just thought Tarkin was bluffing or didn't realize he actually had the power to blow up a planet, the entire line of logic runs into a brick wall once you get to Return of the Jedi, where Vader willingly helps the emperor build another armed and fully operational battle station while knowing exactly what it's capable of and exactly what it's intended to be used for. And he's still totally cool with it.

So, yeah. For all intents and purposes, Darth Vader totally blew up a goddamn planet.

edited 19th Nov '11 8:10:56 PM by Dragonzordasaurus

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Darth Vader also killed hundreds of children in the Jedi Purge. And if you want to keep things in the OT, carbonated Han, knowing that it wasn't a 100% guarantee that he'd survive the process.

And on the topic, I still don't see this characters fate as a Karma Houdini. Just as long as she suffers a major Villainous Breakdown before her death.

"I'll show you fear, there is no hell, only darkness." My twitter

On a somewhat off-topic note, I have to say it slightly bothers me that this

is being placed on with the mass murder of children and being (at the least) an accessory to the destruction of Alderaan, just because it happened to a guy whose name we knew.

Anyway, I agree with the last few posters - she isn't really any more of a Karma Houdini then a lot of other Redemption Equals Death type villains. I wouldn't worry too much about it.

No, but the event did make it seem unlikely that Luke would redeem Vader if he nearly killed someone he was close to.

"I'll show you fear, there is no hell, only darkness." My twitter

I'd say I covered that aspect pretty well.

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