Mormonism 1010

Yes this is late to the party, I know. I meant to make this like four weeks ago, but whatever, right?

So, I'm just going to list everything I know about the religion with no forethought or planning, so this will probably be disjointed and not particularly well-written, for that I apologize. Anyway, onward we go.

• History

In the early nineteenth century, as many of you probably know, there was a "Second Great Awakening" in religion, particularly in the "burned-over section" in western New York, so called because of all the hellfire preaching that was going down there. Christianity saw a massive spike in both adherents and Sectarianism. Priests regularly met for verbal sparring matches in Theology, generally with audiences. In to this great confusion was thrust a boy named Joseph Smith, then about 14 or so. He couldn't decide which church to join. With this in mind, and having read the passage in James 1:5, "If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.", he decided to go into the solitude of the local forest to pray. He knelt, and reports that Satan (the exact quote is "a great darkness", but it's canonically Satan, this has been a point of focus in recent doctrine) immediately attempted to prevent him with all of his might, but Joe kept his faith, and soon thereafter, a pillar of light began to descend upon him, driving Satan back. As he looked up, he saw two guys, one of which pointed to the other and said, "This is my beloved son, hear him". This is important, because it shows Mormonism's denial of the Trinity concept, opting instead for three unique, independent Gods, as well as its claim that God and Jesus have physical bodies. Anyway, Jesus told Joseph to join none of the churches, and to instead wait for him to contact him. Long story short, eventually Joseph gets visited by an angel, who shows him where some Golden Plates are, which Joseph translates into the Book of Mormon.

This was the beginning of the religion, and it quickly began to pick up speed, and enemies. After some twenty years and much persecution, (including the infamous "Extermination Act", which made it legal to kill Mormons) Joseph Smith was killed by an angry mob while he was being held in Carthage Jail. Many thought that this would destroy the Church, and it almost did. There was much infighting immediately following this, and many followers left the fold because of it, but it was eventually decided that Brigham Young would step into Joseph Smith's shoes. Brigham promptly decided that the United States was a bad place for Mormons, and they all packed their bags and headed west. Many of them died on the trip, but not as many as some of them would have you think, I'm pretty sure the final death toll was like 5%. In the end, though, they made it to Salt Lake Valley in Utah, where Brigham uttered the famous words, "this is the place" (which is actually a misquote, but no one really cares). The whole trip earned Brigham a title, "The Moses of the West", for leading his followers out of persecution and into a "promised land", or "Zion" (yes, a Jewish word. Mormons actually borrow a great deal of theology and vocabulary from Judaism).

The Mormon society ended up working, spoiler alert, and the religion would eventually evolve into how we know it today, boasting roughly 13 million followers.

• Additions to Scriptural Canon

While the Book of Mormon is the most famous piece of Mormon writ, it's certainly not the only one. The Doctrine and Covenants (D'n'C for short, and I'm not even kidding) is chiefly a record of the revelation gained by Joseph Smith, but there are a few sections written by more modern prophets. It is also the source of most of the Church's organizational and administrative structure. The other main addition is the Pearl of Great Price, which is basically a retcon of the first bit of the Old Testament, serving to give some of Mormonism's claims more support. The reasoning behind this is that over the six thousand year period the Bible has been around, bad people have tried to pervert the Lord's doctrine to meet their own ideas, changing the wording around. Joseph Smith also went through some passages of the Bible, changing minor details, in the ''Joseph Smith Translation''. These are not, however, the only additions to scripture. The current Mormon prophet is always able to add, change, or reverse any doctrine he sees fit, as directed by God.

• No one cares about the background, Sheep! What do Mormons actually believe?

Oh, fine. But Joseph Smith did a much better job of summarizing the tenets of Mormonism in his 13 Articles of Faith, so I'll just post them here, with a bit of explanatory commentary:

1. We believe in God, the eternal Father, and in his son, Jesus Christ, and in the Holy Ghost.

Sheep: This establishes that the "Godhead" is made up of three separate beings, and that Mormons are Christian.

2. We believe that men shall be punished for their own sins, and not for Adam's transgression.

Sheep: The concept of Original Sin is thusly denied. We need Jesus to save us from ourselves, not from Adam.

3. We believe that through the Atonement of Christ, all mankind will be saved, by obedience to the laws and ordinances of the Gospel.

Sheep: An interesting thing about Mormonism is the "all mankind" bit. Not "all Mormons", mind you. I'll explain this in the "Afterlife" section below.

4. We believe that the first principles and ordinances of the Gospel are: first, Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ; second, Repentance; third, Baptism by Immersion for the remission of sins; fourth, Laying on of hands for the Gift of the Holy Ghost.

Sheep: The third and fourth bits are more telling, especially "Baptism by Immersion", which many Christian religions deny, and the description of the Mormon Priesthood blessing given in the last part. When any Mormon has a significant problem, they will often ask for a blessing from a priesthood holder (There are two sections of Priesthood, but it's kind of complicated and not that important. If anyone wants to hear about it though, say so and I'll follow this up.), who will lay his hands on their head and pray. This is done especially for the aforementioned Gift of the Holy Ghost and blessing the sick. The Gift of the Holy Ghost basically means that the Spirit can influence you to do the right thing by dwelling in you. Before you have the Gift, the Spirit can still act upon you, but not as clearly and with less force. By committing sin, however, you can drive out the Spirit, which means that even with the Gift, you don't necessarily have the Spirit. Wow, this was longer than I intended. Anyway, back with Article of Faith #5:

5. We believe that a man must be called of God, by prophecy, and by the laying on of hands by those who are in authority, to preach the Gospel and administer in the ordinances thereof.

Sheep: Not much to say here, pretty self-explanatory.

6. We believe in the same organization that existed in the primitive church; namely, apostles, prophets, pastors, teachers, evangelists, and so forth.

Sheep: Another interesting thing about Mormonism is its claim that its organization was exactly the same as the one Moses and Abraham participated in. It's unprovable, but whatever, right?

7. We believe in the gift of tongues, prophecy, revelation, visions, healing, interpretation of tongues, and so forth.

Sheep: These are "Gifts of the Spirit", which the Holy Ghost allows you to use, but beyond that, not much to say.

8. We believe the Bible to be the Word of God, as far as it is translated correctly; we also believe the Book of Mormon to be the Word of God.

Sheep: Again, we hit the "translation" problem. This also functions like the Ninth amendment, anything Joseph Smith accidentally looked over while fixing the Bible is covered by this article.

9. We believe all that God has revealed, all that He does now reveal, and we believe that He will yet reveal many great and important things pertaining to the Kingdom of God.

10. We believe in the literal gathering of Israel and in the Restoration of the Ten Tribes; that Zion (the New Jerusalem) will be built upon the American continent; that Christ will reign personally upon the Earth; and, that the Earth will be renewed and receive its paradisiacal [Sheep: of paradise. Archaic, I think] glory.

Sheep: This is the Mormon prophecy of the Second Coming of Christ, again we see the theft of a Jewish term, and a hint at the Afterlife bit that I will explain later.

11. We claim the privilege of worshiping Almighty God, according to the dictates of our own conscience, and allow all men the same privilege, let them worship how, where, or what they may.

Sheep: Yay, religious toleration!

12. We believe in being subject to kings, presidents, rulers, and magistrates, in obeying, honoring, and sustaining the law.

Sheep: My favorite Article of Faith, if only because I'm a sucker for social order.

13. We believe in being honest, true, chaste, benevolent, virtuous, and in doing good to all men; indeed, we may say that we follow the Admonition of Paul-We believe all things, we hope all things, we have endured many things, and hope to be able to endure all things. If there is anything virtuous, lovely, or of good report or praiseworthy, we seek after these things.

Sheep: Basic ideals of Mormonism. The "Admonition of Paul" refers to one of his epistles, but I can never remember which. It basically says the "believing things" bit verbatim, with a few minor changes.

Well, that's the last of them. I'll touch on the Afterlife, but after that I think I'll be done.

• Afterlife

This is where things get weird, but unique. Basically, when you die your spirit gets translated into either of two states: Paradise (also known as Heaven) or Prison (also known as Hell). These are not separate places geographically, but refer instead to the state of mind of the spirits involved. Those in Paradise know they have lived a good life, and rejoice, but those in Prison are racked with torment and guilt. Note that members of all religions can be in Paradise, it only means you have lived a good life. These two states function as a sort of waiting room, in which you kick back and wait for everyone else to be born and to die. At a certain point, though, God declares the world over. That day is called Judgement Day. It is to be followed by the Millennium, a period of time in which everyone who ever lived gets to come and hang out. During the Millennium, there shall be no war, no strife. The Lion shall lay down with the Lamb. Jesus will reign during the Millennium. But, all good things have to end, and eventually the party will stop. When that happens, everyone gets sorted into one of four groups:

1. The Celestial ("Glory of the Sun") Kingdom: This is where people who believe in Christ and have accepted all of the "Saving Ordinances" (to be explained below) go. God is the ruler here, and everything is great. EDIT BY REQUEST: The Celestial Kingdom is split into three sections, and you can move up the hierarchy depending on how many Saving Ordinances you have done, with the highest being accessible only through Covenant Marriage in a Mormon Temple. This one, however, is really really cool, because if you get into the highest level, you become as God, or "exalted". This means it is within your power to create a brand new universe of your own and fill it with souls, and you can be their God, just as Yahweh is to us. Of course, your spouse helps out too, and in fact Yahweh's wife is up there as well. He just made the decision to keep her out of the picture, because he didn't want her to be defamed by the world like he has been. Which is pretty swell, you have to admit. The logical question is, of course, "Has our God lived through a life just as we have, thus gaining his status?" The answer is that we don't know. Seriously, that's the Church's official position.

2. The Terrestrial ("Glory of the Moon") Kingdom: This is where people who believe in Christ, but have not accepted all of the Saving Ordinances, go. Jesus rules here, and everything is slightly less great.

3. The Telestial ("Glory of the Stars, When Viewed From The Earth, Yes We Know The Sun Is A Star As Well, Thank You") Kingdom: This is where people who don't believe in Christ go, (and those who have, but still maintain outstanding sins) which means pretty much everyone else. The Spirit rules here, and everything is even less great, but still greater than you could possibly imagine. Interestingly, this Kingdom resides upon the Earth when it is renewed, as we remember from Article of Faith #10.

4. The Sons of Perdition, or Outer Darkness: This is where a select few horrible horrible people go, those who have known God yet still sought to destroy him. The only two confirmed Sons of Perdition are Cain and Lucifer.

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Ok, there you go. If anyone still has questions, feel free to ask. Remember, this is a pretty elementary introduction, believe it or not. The LDS Church has a huge amount of interesting doctrine, theology, and practices that I didn't have time to discuss (read: I don't care enough).

Edit due to omission: I forgot to talk about saving ordinances! How could you guys let this slide? I am ashamed of all of you. Every single one. Anyway, Saving Ordinances are basically the things you need to do to become exalted. It's like a video game, you have to get all the secret bonuses to achieve the best ending. Anyway, they include: Baptism, Endowment, Marriage, and Sealing. We've discussed Baptism and Marriage, but the others haven't been mentioned. When a Mormon is an adult (I think the limit is >18, but I'm fuzzy on this), they go to a Temple and watch a little presentation thing, and get told about some Theological secrets or something. I'm not completely sure about this, as I've never done it personally and it isn't exactly the #1 topic of discussion (anything that happens in a Temple is considered a personal experience, between you and God; it's often compared to intimate experience between you and your spouse). Sealing happens when you get married or adopt a child (when any non-hereditary but legal filial relationship is formed), all the members of the family (including those being added) kneel and hold hands around an Altar and a higher-ranking ('rank' isn't exactly the proper word, it's not like you get promoted or anything, but there is a certain hierarchy, and this is someone who is on the higher end) priesthood holder says a prayer. This bonds the family beyond death, meaning they can experience Exaltation together.

As is often mentioned, all of these ordinances can be done for the Dead. This is why the Church places so much emphasis on Ancestral History, finding relatives (and unrelated people) who have not had these ordinances, so members can do the ordinance for them. As is mentioned by me a few posts down the line, whoever this ordinance is done for will have the opportunity to accept or deny it. This does mean, however, that someone who never heard the Gospel in their life, even someone who may have sinned a great deal, can still be saved from Hell and be Exalted. This is what I was talking about in the comment for Article of Faith #3.

Edit: Holy crap, that was way longer than I expected it to be. Sorry for the Wall'o'Text. Not much I could've done about it, though.

edited 13th Nov '11 8:50:52 PM by TheEarthSheep

Still Sheepin'

Why does nobody ever mention Exaltation? That's the coolest part of being a dead Mormon!

[1] This facsimile operated in part by synAC.

Honestly, I thought that was a bit too in-depth for this.

Do you want me to add it? I will.

edited 9th Nov '11 7:17:02 PM by TheEarthSheep

Still Sheepin'

Do it! It's an excellent selling point for the oft-marginalized megalomaniacal demographic.

[1] This facsimile operated in part by synAC.

Added.

Still Sheepin'

You can always talk about some of the less inflammatory, yet still controversial aspects of Mormon belief and practice. (Presumably it's prudent to leave the FLDS and the like out of this discussion.)

1) Vicarious post-mortem baptism

2) Mormon doctrine of health

3) Temple garments

One seldom sees the LDS perspective on such things.

edited 9th Nov '11 7:44:29 PM by ForlornDreamer

Thank you for supporting what I had heard.

[1] This facsimile operated in part by synAC.

What do you mean by 'Mormon doctrine of health'?

But for the other questions:

Baptism for the Dead: Pretty simple, anyone with a temple recommend (literally a piece of paper that means your local leaders thought you were rad enough to enter the temple doors) can go to a Temple, and they will have a list of names of people that have died but have not been baptized, and you will go be baptized for them. The ordinance is carried up to the Spirit World (the aforementioned Paradise and Prison, collectively), where the person can choose to accept it or not. If they do, they go up a rung in their ultimate placement. If not, then tough luck for them, I suppose.

Temple Garments: It's really simple, they're just there to remind a married person of the marital oath they took. For example, if you were about to commit adultery, but then while taking your clothes off notice your garments and think to yourself, "Hey, I promised I wouldn't do this, so maybe I shouldn't," and so you don't.

edited 9th Nov '11 7:51:26 PM by TheEarthSheep

Still Sheepin'

No, actually, I don't have to admit any such thing. This was one of the big sticking points for me when I was Mormon. I have always been anti-pedestalization of women, and that goes for divine women as well as mortal ones. I always thought that God's wife would rather not have been separated from Her spirit children—after all, she was supposed to be the perfect mother just as God was the perfect father. Not to mention, Mormons use the unambiguously masculine character of their concept of the Godhead as their justification for denying women the priesthood or any significant authority in the church, meaning that when God chose to keep his wife uninvolved, he was choosing to make second-class citizens of half the souls he was supposedly shepherding.

Stuff what I do.

LIES! I found it fascinating and enlightening. I wasn’t aware of a great deal of it.

Justice is a joy to the godly, but it terrifies evildoers.Proverbs21:15 FimFiction account.

From personal experience, this is upheld at least slightly less often then it's violated. Possibly more, depending on how you view missionaries as related to religious tolerance. I know there's people who don't consider it particularly nice to have random strangers knock on their doors and tell them, "Hey, your religion is cool and Imma let you finish, but Mormonism is really the best religion of them all."*

^{scumbag rapper voice completely optional.}

That’s the epitome of privilege right there, not considering armed nazis a threat to your life. - Silasw

Am I allowed to ask potentially inflammatory questions?

Please.

Why is your theology pop-cultural butchering of christian mythology without all of the cool stuff, and why do hate your group dedicated to reconcile mormonism and homosexuality when your religion supposedly doesn't step on other people's rights? (Although, since dishonourable proselyting has occured, I suppose the main mormon church is going Knight Templar).

A single phrase renders Christianity a delusional cult

....huh?

Karalora, Dead Man's Life: I'd probably prefer that this doesn't devolve into a debate topic, so Kar, if you want to discuss this I would advise the creation of a new topic, and Dead, feel free to ask it, but if it is a very divisive and inflammatory question, I would ask you to create a new topic as well.

Blue Ninja: To be fair, that doesn't really matter. This is about what Mormons believe, not whether they succeed at practicing what they preach.

Edit: Gannet, it seems like you already know the answer you want, and thus wouldn't hear any other. So why would you ask?

edited 10th Nov '11 3:22:57 PM by TheEarthSheep

Still Sheepin'

Because I'm curious about the opinions of someone who actually believes this. I can't always just assume something is societal cancer without back up evidence.

A single phrase renders Christianity a delusional cult

Ok, well then,

Why is your theology pop-cultural butchering of christian mythology without all of the cool stuff,

That's an opinion.

and why do hate your group dedicated to reconcile mormonism and homosexuality when your religion supposedly doesn't step on other people's rights?

What do you even mean?

Still Sheepin'

I should had worded it better.

There was a mormon group that was against Prop 8, but all other mormon groups appearently hated it with a passion and I don't know if it dismantled or not.

A single phrase renders Christianity a delusional cult

The official position of the church was against Prop 8, but individual members are encouraged to make their own political decisions. So I still don't see the problem.

Still Sheepin'

Okay then. I suppose it is easy to commit misconceptions when mormons and scientologists were the groups more interested in letting Prop 8 pass.

A single phrase renders Christianity a delusional cult

Oh, I forgot to touch on Saving Ordinances! But that is now fixed and added to the OP, for all interested.

Still Sheepin'

I'd ask why the Mormon Church pours huge amounts of money into various causes (such as the aforementioned Prop8 thing), but I doubt I'd get a good answer.

go ahead and do every stupid thing you can imagine

You don't have to keep on adding things to the OP, you know.

It might be a little easier to add anything else you think of in another post.

Justice is a joy to the godly, but it terrifies evildoers.Proverbs21:15 FimFiction account.

Because they agree with those things, and have huge amounts of money. It's the same as any politician or otherwise wealthy individual, they want a good public image and they like certain charities/movements.

Yeah, but I figure I should only add unrelated information via new post, especially because I said I would add the Saving Ordinances bit in the OP, I thought I should have just squeezed it in at the end. So I did.

Still Sheepin'