Let's make shitty music together.

I'm in.

Actually, I just made a song and have a new pseudonym I'm using for this project. So now, I give you...

"HoOSHA!" by AwESOME MOVIE SOUND NOISES!!!.

Yeah, quite frankly I'm terrified too. Feel free to add something to it if you want - it's probably annoying enough already, but I guess some terrible guitar playing or even just more unintelligible screaming could be added.

Fun facts for those of you reading in 2020: The name AwESOME MOVIE SOUND NOISES!!! was borrowed from an unintelligible, hopefully trolling user review of a movie - the lowercase "w" was added by me, as a typo I decided was annoying looking enough to keep; then I also applied that capitalization to the song name. The vocals were kinda supposed to parody Yamatanka Eye of Boredoms (meets Brak). The psychotic laugh track was going to be me doing even more screaming, but I cracked up at my own performance and on the spur of the moment I just tried to fake laugh throughout the entire song - at a certain point I start coughing from fake laughing so much.

Edited by MikeK on Mar 30th 2020 at 1:26:18 AM

I took King Of Kings' guitar fragment and made it palpably more revolting. Behold, "Guitar Flailure"!

Alright, here's what I've done so far with the first "song", see what you guys can do with it to make it worse. Tags are unofficial, and I haven't used everything uploaded yet; I want to save some stuff for later.

@Bound By The Moon: Site won't load for me for some reason, could you upload your thingy to Mediafire instead?

I'm interested.

Anyway, I'm downloading the song (nice title). I'm going to use my effects pedal with its "wall of white noise" setting to put some... well, riffs is too kind a word... on it.

Horrible white noise (all in the left ear) complete! Here's the new version. Actually, the guitar is a bit further down in the mix than I wanted because I didn't want to overwhelm the track, but maybe someone could turn it up a bit? (Unfortunately, the name has no umlaut and the name of the album is "Year:2042,He Conquered the blah blah blah" because I forgot what the album's name was. Maybe that'll make it worse...)

http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?jai9so9vuex8y6j

edited 21st Apr '11 6:39:33 PM by YonTroper

DropBox >>> MediaFire. Here's the link again, in case something went wrong with the original post.

edited 21st Apr '11 7:38:38 PM by BoundByTheMoon

The site still won't load for me, unfortunately. I get as far as the QuickTime logo and then it stops loading.

@Mike K: GOOD GOD THAT IS THE MOST EVIL THING I HAVE EVER HEARD. Screw Immortal, screw Rammstein, hell, screw Merzbow, that thing is pure malevolence incarnate.

Immortal is evil? I always thought they were like teddy bears. Frostbitten, corpsepaint-wearing teddy bears.

So, BBTM, I got past the QuickTime logo and played your thingy (guess I should have been more patient), but being a dumbass I couldn't find a way to download it. Rather than download it, I decided to use my cheap-ass microphone to record the solo from my laptop speakers. Here is the result.

SUCH TROO BLAЦK EXCELLENCE SHALL NOT GO UNDRUMMERED. COMMENCING WORK ON SHITTY DRUM MACHINE BEATS NOW.

Right-click -> Save As will do. Dropbox links go directly to the file itself, instead of a waiting screen.

Thanks, downloading now.

This is BLVCKer than the BLVCKest BLVCK times infinity.

Be careful using the word "gh_tt_" around this song.

Also, LAME refused to encode the song in 66kbps, so you're listening to it in 64kbps instead. Y U DISCRIMINATE, OPEN SOURCE COMMUNITY

Also, it completely loses its blackness in the gh_tt_ version but I included it anyway.

edited 22nd Apr '11 11:29:04 AM by Litis

I'm on it.

I'll add you to the list in the OP now.

OK, here's "trapped in a room WITH NO ESCAPE", a seven-minute-long mess of kvlt distortion, shitty vocals and other "goodies". I also played around a tiny bit with Yon Troper's version of "Imma Hard Durg Taker".

See what you guys think.

Here's a thought for what I could write for the liner notes of our album.

"The Werecow has come for your soul on the moon of the black day rising in the shadows east as old as time. Beware. You might be next. NAKED TIME! Flinch the castrated necessary, land no more, reel the months of kill. We make the music that Saparmurat Niyazov likes. Gurbansoltan. I want to eat jello pudding with Jello Biafra. Holding back the years, thinking of the fear I've had so long. Spiked karpet. Lucy in the sky with diamond Dave is a dream Theater quote and we make the music that Nightmare day of Cinemaful likes. Under the sign of the black market we have a white mans rhythm and we will ENT-ER-TAIN u because there is no way out of here it will be dark soon. We still want to put it in yer pooper."

Nonsensical enough?

Also, maybe if it's all listed as different artists, we can list our hypothetical album as a label compilation.

edited 22nd Apr '11 11:47:16 PM by YonTroper

If you want a god-awful synth drum solo, complete with jacked-up treble, a huge load of fuzz and "I'VE GOT BLISTERS ON MY TOES!!!", go here.

http://www.mediafire.com/?7nh5buszkfhcrfq

I want someone to record vocals for a godawful deathcore song, "Year 3088: Nail Polish Powered Hair Straightener". Could also be crunkcore.

Here's a free Auto-Tune VST if anyone goes with the latter.

edited 23rd Apr '11 2:23:39 AM by Litis

I'm game. You could also use the drum loop as a basis, maybe - it's slightly better than Waking the Cadaver, though, I reckon.

Oh, and that Auto-Tuner doesn't work on my Mac. I'll just use Garage Band's "enhance tuning" feature. I just need some simultaneously Christian, emo and "girls up in this club" lyrics - anyone want to do some crunkcore songwriting? The only thing I have in mind is to make sure to yell "GO!" before the breakdown - how else would the bros know when to mosh?

edited 23rd Apr '11 2:44:26 AM by YonTroper

A crunkcore/deathcore crossover? I'd be up for doing some br00tal growls, and I could attempt some sikk piggy squealz (I can't do them properly for the life of me, so my failed attempts should suit the song).

Idea for lyrical theme: the song tells the story of some metrosexual dude who was in da club when his girlfriend, whom he refers to as "Shawty", broke up with him. Afterwards, he whines about how his life sucks because she left him, and then it transforms into a preachy "EVERYONE IS GOING TO HELL, ACCEPT JESUS AS YOUR SAVIOUR" thingy.

Also, we need to steal some At the Gates riffs.

I thought about actually just sampling At the Gates, but if this gets onto iTunes or anything (which I wholeheartedly support), we'd get into legal trouble. But yeah, whoever's playing guitar for "U Ain't Christian, Shawty", rip off At the Gates whenever you're not doing a bro0tal breakdown for the bros.

Also, lyrics sent to Lordnecronus for approval (PM only at the moment - they're horrendously not work safe, and if the mods catch wind of them we're done for).

Lyrics approved.

I've got my axe tuned to C (C F Bb Eb G C) right now, which is just half a step shy of what At G uses. I'm not sure that'll be br00000tul enough, but it'll probably do. And I've got about 3 years of experience in the "ripping off At The Gates" department. Any specifics about tempo/structure?

Haven't really worked out the tempo specifics; going fast when the ATG riffs are playing and slow when the br00tal breakdowns are playing sounds like a decent way to go, though. Yon Troper sent me his idea for the structure of the song in his PM along with the lyrics; I'll send it to you now if you like.

edited 23rd Apr '11 3:28:26 PM by Lordnecronus

Go ahead.