Things You are No Longer Allowed to Do in an RPG

I am no longer allowed to take a Plasma Gun at the start of Only War if the GM accidentally made it a regimental favoured weapon... also, if I do somehow get my hands on a Plasma Gun, the GM reserves the right to do everything in his power to get it off me, he was not happy my paranoid trooper incinerated 5 local priests with it in one shot

But was it HERESY?

ehhhhh, depends on your point of view... yes they were a sanctioned cult, but they were big into ancestor worship and tradition (though they worshipped Big E over all), I had the dissenter trait and an off world redemptionist priest assigned to our squad was certain they were heretics, after I failed to incite them to kill one another they decided to threaten us, so he pulled out a flamer... and I set my plasma gun to maximal and incinerated them before he could kill them, I then told him he was taking the rap for killing them and barricaded myself into my room again.

the redemptionist said it wasn't heresy, the locals.... kinda did....

edited 18th Nov '16 7:11:02 PM by FieldMarshalFry

Hey, don't commit heresy if you can't take a plasma blast I say. Filthy heretics had it comin'.

If the bloody REDEMPTIONIST says it's not heresy, then it isn't heresy and your plasma rights are reinstated immediately. Inform your GM I said it is ok.

well... only problem is the locals don't want me to have it (they don't like the redemptionist either, after all, he did try to kill their priests as well)... and we're on their ship... (it's an Dark Age relic and basically Rivet City in SPAAAAAAACE) and said ship... has volkaite weapons mounted in the hull...

Funny thing is that, from an Orthodox Imperial standpoint, the Redemptionists are heretics.

It is recommended to blow up the barn after everyone has left.

edited 20th Nov '16 8:50:21 PM by Blackie

Elves do not have the racial trait: tsundere

Elves do not have an obsession with tassels

Elves do not hiss when they are not allowed food

Elves do not get drunk from pepsi

Elves do not have universities which offer 'daintiness' degrees.

I cannot make an elf from Ukraine, nor a dwarf from Africa

That last one doesn't work in Pathfinder.

There are Dwarves in the Africa-analogue.

Apparently, according to my gf who D Ms D&D, I am not allowed to make a wizard that specializes in the school of lesbomancy.

@2711 Well, not in D&D. Save that for a particularly enthusiastic Verbena or Cult of Ecstacy mage in Mage: The Ascension. Not recommended to be in the same party as a Celestial Chorus member, and only with a Virtual Adept if you don't mind the running commentary.

• If I fail to intimidate someone by threatening to castrate them with their own teeth they are not instead confused for a round as they try to work out the logistics.

• Elves do not regrow if you plant and water whats left like a tree.

• I cannot use the phrase 'Shit is getting warpy in here' or refer to "Warpyness" outside of the 40k setting.

• No one is allowed to abuse the rules like a redheaded Welsh stepchild.

• "fucking psykers" is not an acceptable thing to say about non-40k wizards, say "fucking wizards" instead, and no you are not allowed to play a Blank equivalent in Dn D, BECAUSE WIZARDS DON'T SUMMON DAEMONS ON A BAD ROLL IN THIS GAME!

Honestly, my GM probably would've allowed something like that unless you failed by a huge margin and/or rolled a natural 1. And just so we're on topic here:

Given the setting of our campaign is a high fantasy/early steampunk era, "Rave Ball" is not an appropriate name for a blinding spell. Also, it doesn't create a disco ball.

What's confusing here? It's just a matter of ripping their lower jaw off...

There is no gnomish god of bagpipes.

Gnomes do not ride corgis into battle.

Gnomes do not have the racial trait: Bouncy

Gnomes also do not have the racial trait: sugar-sweat

There is no Gnomish god of fartillery.

Nor one of fire farts.

Nor one of 'overground gas supplies'

(It was a family game and my brother's a fan of Pathfinder.)

No longer allowed to accidentally risk total party kills.

Someone be blaspheming against the gnomish god of war, corgis, and bagpipes.

Few things terrify the big folk like the songs of charging gnome cavalry.

No longer allowed to casually kill arachnids in front of superstitious drow. Especially if you know one of them is a drider disguising herself with a polymorph spell.

Of course gnomes don't ride corgis into battle - they're not built for it. They're prone to bad backs, you know.

Also, I see some GM fears the war bagpipe. Or maybe they just feel that if firearms are a no-go, so is the war bagpipe.

Apparently, if I play a necromancer I'm not allowed into any museums of paleontology (or D&D equivalent) and am restricted to only raising human skeletons.

Would paleontology really exist as a discipline given how many random places have dinosaurs? I think it'd just be biology studies all around.

Yeah, Paleontology wouldn't be a thing in a D&D-esque setting. Or at least, not paleontology as it is in real life.

Anyway, that restriction is bullshit. You're not constrained by the size of the creatures, but by their racial HD (no more than 20). Animating a dinosaur is perfectly legal (a Diplodocus is exactly at the limit).