Our avatars are in a room together

(Figures Filbert would like to be given some space and can probably handle it on his own. Goes over to Cloud and peers over his shoulder curiously.)

I lied to you. I toyed with your emotions only to push you into mastering seals. You are not angry with me?

Go for it Spaz. At least, I don't mind. Not sure about everyone else)

(reading still)

Me loves some walls of text, especially done well. Go for it.

   So... What is this place exactly?   

(Observes Cloud.)

(Writes, and hands the note to Ghost Rider.)

"INTERUNIVERSAL CROSSROADS. WELCOME."

ROW ROW WRITE DA LETTER! I don't have a problem with it. :)

edited 30th May '12 8:49:16 AM by MobileLeprechaun

-chucks the juggled energy ball up and catches it, it dissipates around his now clenched fist, he makes a punch in the air, the green energy dissipates when the fist stops moving- Anyone feel like some sparring with Good Ol' Johnny?

I'm upset, for sure. But I guess I'm too relieved to see that you're okay to be too angry.

But you still deserve this much. -slaps Rachel-

edited 30th May '12 8:48:51 AM by DarkConfidant

(Feels like some sparring with good old Johnny. Nods.)

   I see.   

   This room seems to have a... weird feeling attached to it. Like there was something... unspeakably evil here, not long ago.   

(cringes a little in surprise at Nel slapping Rachel)

(closes his book and stands up) I suppose I should work these decayed muscles a little. I will gladly be your sparring partner Mr Cage.

edited 30th May '12 8:51:26 AM by LatverianBadger

-looks absolutely shocked for a moment then places and hand over her cheek and smiles-

(Tilts his head confusedly at Ghost Rider's remark. Ponders for a moment... Who could that possibly be...? Goldbaum? Or the guy from last night?)

-hugs Rachel- You really worried me, you hear! Don't go doing stuff like that again.

   Where did he go?(looks at Gordon) You don't try to hide him, do you?   

(Shakes his head. Is now worried.)

   You speak truth. You have your own bunch of sins tugging at your very soul, but you repented and still try to repent as much as possible(nods)...   

(Stares blankly in shock. If this guy is anything, he's perceptive.)

-hugs her back-

I promise.

Alright, Rachel. How about some breakfast now.

Sorry there Gordon, blanked out for a second, had an idea for a movie. You still up for sparring?

(raises hand at Johnny) Erm....

(Nods, then quickly writes.)

"I THINK THE GENTLEMAN OVER THERE SAID HE FELT LIKE IT TOO. COULD WE BOTH SPAR WITH YOU?"

Yay!

-His handwriting becomes shakier as the letter continues, until by the end it's barely legible at all-

To Tifa,

This is a letter, obviously. I have a lot to say, and I guess it's kind of cowardly that I'm not saying it to your face. But if I did, you'd smash mine in with a fist, so that's kind of not an option by this point. So you get a letter instead, so you have to listen to what I have to say. You can hate me all you want.

I've been doing a lot of thinking lately, about us. Partially about that promise I made to you when we were kids, and why I made it. I promised to protect you, to save you if you were in trouble, stupid sentimental shit like that. It wasn't to me, though. My whole life, I've wanted to become stronger, to be big enough to fight anyone, to protect the things that matter to me. In that regard, I mostly failed. I only really succeeded on that day three years ago, at the Advent. I was so happy that day, you have no idea. Not just to be alive, obviously, and not just because you all were, too. It was because for the first time in my life, I really felt like I succeeded at something, that I had finally stopped being a worthless piece of shit and accomplished something. I could beat anyone now. Nothing really posed a threat to me. I could keep us safe forever, you and Denzel and I, and we'd be a family, a proper one. I promised I'd stop running, too. Tifa, I'm so, so sorry. I think this might be the first time I've intentionally broken a promise, and I'm sorry it had to be one to you.

Then I showed up here, and suddenly there were these people things that could wish people dead by thinking about it. We fought one, even. We won, but just barely. If it weren't for Boris, I'd be dead. Before we got there, though, we went through a room that made us see things. I saw you, Tifa, but you were dead, and I was the one that did it. And I realised how easily I could lose you — all of you. A month after that, when I finally saw you again, we became engaged. Please don't think that I didn't mean it. I did.

There were more things, after that. Even stronger ones. They liked to go after me, you know. And there was nothing I could do to stop them. To say I was like a bug to them would be a gross exajir exagerachion. They

I never did tell you about the world the Blind Idiot God made. I saw you there, too. You're everywhere, it seems. Not that I mind.

You had become like me. A Fragment. We even had a son. He was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen, Tifa. He had your eyes, I found out later. He was like us, too, but, Denzel was so happy about having a little brother. Then She popped up. She said she'd make our son like him. That she'd leave him alone if I infected as many people as I could. So I did. But when I realised what I'd done, realised how many people would die because of my selfishness, I went back to the bar to give the world a chance.

I killed you both. You, and our son.

I find it funny that the one time I decide to not be selfish in my life, and that was I like being selfish. It makes me happy. Not gonna lie. But that stops here, too.

You know what happened after that, of course. The fourth Reunion. I killed some boy. I don't even know his name. You saw the aftermath, what I looked like. And you still took me in. You're all far kinder than I ever deserved. But then I did what I did to Junon, and it all went to hell in a handbasket from there. I was the only one who had to hide, but you came with me.

I see Dante, with Lady, and I want to kill him, I'm so jealous. I want to kill him and take everything he has, that I can't ever have myself. It's funny. It's really fucking funny that we're really quite similar, but he's succeeded in nearly every place I've failed. Hell, even Trish isn't rotting at the bottom of a lake. His father was a famous demon knight, or something, who fought a war for humanity itself, instead of some no-account bum who knocked up his mother, ditched her before they were even engaged when he found out, and left to die of alcohol poisoning in a gutter somewhere years later. And his brother... his brother at least died for something of substance. What did mine die for? Me? Pathetic.

And it's kind of sad that the only place I have him beat is my fucking bike.

Of course, I could never kill Dante. He's done everything for me, for us, expecting nothing in return. He's too nice for his own good. I only hope Denzel turns out to be half the man he is. If he does, I think I can die happy. Maybe on a better day, he could have been part of our family as well. I'd be honoured, and I know he's grown on you, too. He does that after a while.

So, why am I writing all of this? Once again, being entirly entier entirely honest here; I'm sick of being weak. I'm sick of being useless, I'm sick of being unable to help myself, and I'm sick to death of dragging you down with my problems. Don't take it the wrong way; I'm not saying you don't understand me, or how to help. You do, and you have no idea how much it means to me. You understand, all of you, and you always know how to fix things, and you've made me a better person for it. But it's taking a toll on you, and it hurts me to see you suffering on my behalf. That's not what I promised, Tifa.

I guess a small part of this is that I spend my entire life becoming stronger, and then I find out it's all for nothing. But that was to be expected, really. After all, you're the one who always winds up saving me. You were the only one that stayed when they found out what I was. I've dreamed of returning the favour, of even surpassing it, but nothing I do will ever come close to equalling what you've done for me. What anyone has done for me, really. There are so many kind people in my life, Tifa. How am I supposed to live up to all of that, surrounded by all of you, and being who I am? You've said it yourself; I'm messed up. I never really knew what that meant until recently, but it's true.

I'm going to stop being selfish now. I'm done being, as an acuantanse aquaintese associate of mine once put it, "needy". I might need you, but it's clear you could do well without me. You can both come out of hiding now. They're only looking for me. Denzel can see his friends again. So can you. The rest of our family will stop hating you, even if they can never forgive me.

Please try to understand this one last time. I won't ask you to forgive me, though. I'm not an idiot, although Cid would definitely say I am.

I love you all dearly. Never forget that. Please, if you have to, forget everything else, but never forget that.

Cloud

And now that I've obviously found my writing muse again, I think I'll work on Chapter 6 a bit.

Oh...well you see some of what I said yesterday was not a lie.

   (acknowledges Gordon's shock with a nod) I can look into your soul and judge if you are evil or not. This comes in handy when dealing with more... problematic cases.   

Gotta go for a dinner. Be back in 15-20 minutes.