ITT: We are all Pokémon Trainers

Mordred: <Eh, magic is just sufficiently advanced technology.>

Artoria: <I have most certainly never seen one before, so.>

All are significantly abnormal in a normal world... All are significantly normal in an abnormal world.

Nimbasa City

Corrin: Well, I have no idea how it works, then. Or why a stranger gave it to me so willingly...

-A moment of realization crosses her face-

Corrin: Oh dear gods, is this armband cursed?

Mason: No, it's not. Chill.

Mordred: <Well, it's possible, if unlikely>

Artoria: <... While possible the only way I know of to curse something is the Ghost move Curse and you do not seem to be rapidly being drained of your vitality.>

All are significantly abnormal in a normal world... All are significantly normal in an abnormal world.

Nimbasa City

-Corrin looks positively horrified-

Corrin: That's a thing?!

Mason: In Xerneas' name, I wish I understood a word you two were saying so I could know what the hell she's reacting to.

edited 18th Dec '17 11:09:53 PM by BittersweetNSour

Mordred: <Wow she's naive. She wasn't - OW> -She is interrupted by a backhanded slap from Artoria-

Artoria: <Be nice.> -She nods- <Usually, ghosts only put enough into the curse to knock one unconscious. Aside from when hunting, I would think.>

edited 18th Dec '17 11:18:46 PM by Izshta

All are significantly abnormal in a normal world... All are significantly normal in an abnormal world.

Nimbasa City

Corrin: Oh. Okay. Normally when we described "rapidly being drained of vitality" in my home world it pertained to either very deadly magic, or being gored and bleeding out in the soil. That seemed... uncharacteristic of what I've seen of this world so far.

Mason: Oh, no, bleeding out still happens. Just not on an everyday basis.

Corrin: ...Pleasant.

Artoria nods. <Yes, it does. Most battles, however, are simply to the first one knocked unconscious, though exceptions do exist, especially when dealing with Shadowed pokemon.>

Mordred: <Now they're exceptionally unpleasant nasties.>

Artoria: -frowns- <Indeed.>

edited 18th Dec '17 11:30:48 PM by Izshta

All are significantly abnormal in a normal world... All are significantly normal in an abnormal world.

Nimbasa City

-Corrin tilts her head-

Corrin: Shadowed Pokemon?

-A look crosses Mason's face.-

Mason: Let's talk about that another time, when you're not still reeling from culture shock.

Corrin: I'm sure I can handle whatever it is just fine!

Mordred: <Basically? Pokemon tortured and brainwashed until they no longer feel emotions except violence and anger.>

Artoria: <Mordred please.>

Mordred: <Hey, she said she could handle it!>

Artoria: <... Also violence is not an emotion>

Mordred: <Shush you.>

All are significantly abnormal in a normal world... All are significantly normal in an abnormal world.

Nimbasa City

-Corrin frowns.-

Corrin: ...I see this world has its fair share of villains and blackguards, then.

Mason: I have never heard the word "blackguard" spoken out loud until now.

Mordred: <Oh, plenty. Team Iron, those Templar dudes the one guy mentioned, that one fruit company ->

Artoria: <...>

Mordred: <Hey, Best Berry is a fruit company. They're shady on principle. And didn't you see the Interpol raid on their HQ?>

Artoria: -smirks-

Mordred: <What?>

Artoria: <Oh, nothing.>

Mordred shrugs. <Anyhow, fruit companies, Team Flare, though they're mostly not around anymore, Team Skull, though they're mostly just punks, Team Aqua used to be, but they're now some sort of anti-pirate organization, Team Rocket, Silph Co, the Illuminati, the [Freemasons] ->

Artoria: <Mordred, now you are just listing conspiracy theories.>

Mordred: <What? The Illuminati totally exist! And Silph Co is totally involved! See,>

Artoria covers Mordred's mouth, leaving her conspiracy rant muffled.

edited 18th Dec '17 11:58:39 PM by Izshta

All are significantly abnormal in a normal world... All are significantly normal in an abnormal world.

Nimbasa City

-Corrin stares.-

Corrin: ...You lost me at "fruit company".

Mason: Oh my god.

Artoria: -still muffling Mordred- <Apologies, she reads too many conspiracy blogs.>

Mordred: -wriggles free- <YOU CAN'T HIDE THE TRUUUUUUUUTH!>

Artoria: -smacks Mordred upside the head.- <Mordred, please.>

Mordred: <Ow.>

Artoria: <Regardless, yes, this world has plenty of villains in it. Those who would exploit others in their quest for power. Those who would manipulate others to serve them. Those who would kill out of misguided or blatantly false ideals. Those who believe they alone have the world's best interests at heart.>

All are significantly abnormal in a normal world... All are significantly normal in an abnormal world.

Nimbasa City

Corrin: I see... I may not have my memories fully, but every one of those seems to resonate with me. Unfortunately, I am in no state yet to fight to make a difference in that, as much as I would gladly put myself on the battlefield to help. I'm... very out of my element.

Mason: I love losing track of two thirds of the conversation.

Artoria: -smiles warmly- <I am glad you are so willing, but yes, I suppose you would need training to acclimate to an unfamiliar form.>

Mordred: <Artoria could probably teach you a thing or two, she's a pretty good teacher.>

Artoria looks embarrassed. <Um... you think so?>

Mordred: <Well, you seem to have gotten those Fomantis into a reasonably effective fighting force.>

Artoria just goes silent remembering how that happened.

Mordred: <Oh, come on, it wasn't that bad.>

Artoria is laying on the ground looking defeated while a bunch of Fomantis run amok.

There's a bush currently on fire.

Meanwhile, Mordred is laughing her ass off.

Artoria: <MORDRED!>

Artoria: <It really was.>

Mordred: <... Okay the start was rocky and I didn't help things.>

Mordred is conspiring with a few Fomantis, presumably plotting pranks.

Artoria: <Mordred, what are you doing with my Fomantis trainees?>

Mordred: <Ummm, nothing?>

Artoria gives her a disbelieving stare.

Mordred: <Uh... Fomantis, pounce!>

Mordred scrambles off as the four Fomantis jump at Artoria, their combined force knocking her down.

Artoria: <MORDRED!>

Artoria: <You most certainly did not...>

Mordred looks down. <Heh, heh, heh, no. But! You learned something from the experience, right?>

edited 19th Dec '17 12:44:33 AM by Izshta

All are significantly abnormal in a normal world... All are significantly normal in an abnormal world.

Nimbasa City

Corrin: Really? I-I would be honored! Mason's other Dragon has been getting me acquainted with the basics of how the world works, but if you're offering, I would be glad to!

Mason: Okay seriously, what am I missing?

Artoria: <...>

Mordred: <Oh, come on, Artoria.>

Artoria: -nods slowly- <Yes... I... Yes. I will teach you to fight. I will help to teach you the ways of this place, so that you can fight on the battlefield once more against darkness and villainy. I will aid you, Corrin. This I vow.>

Mordred claps.

edited 19th Dec '17 1:10:41 AM by Izshta

All are significantly abnormal in a normal world... All are significantly normal in an abnormal world.

-Phoenix is sitting in a room with a large amount of coffee.-

-He seems to not have slept for a few nights.-

Phoenix: whyamisoworriedit'sFRANKnobodycoulkillhimimeanicouldn'tnomatterhowharditried- okay I need to talk to someone.

-Phoenix exits the room and walks into a corridor. He stops for a moment, thinking. He makes his mind up.-

Phoenix: Saffron, coming up.

Harvey: <Aw, that's my line.>

Trial of my new Lamborghini here

Phaz: ~Oh, hey, fellow coder. Noice~...~

Cynthia blinks and coughs.

Cynthia: "Anyway. How did Jester took the place in control?"

What's the use of money if you ain't gonna break the mold? Even at the center of fire, there is cold All that glitters ain't gold

"I am sorry, but reprogramming would not be possible for you. The technology does not work how you know, the language it speaks is... foreign."

Before Colton appeared a complex crystal array, each Crystal glowing and even seeming to... sing a bit, a soft hymn in order and harmony. "We were only capable of forging these thanks to the Jester."

Before Cynthia appeared a Guardian, it stood still, "Our machinery was powered by the black and green ink, we called it Vril, it seemed to respond well to machinery and nature."

Out of the Guardian floated a glass tank with a black liquid that gave off a soft green sheen, the tank floated back.

"We only found out too late that every bit of the Jester... of 724+, was a part of it. Still aware and connected, only until he wanted it not to be."

The Guardian spasmed and took on a hostile stance, it vanished, "He couldn't get them all, but the Jester turned our own machinery against us... though only the machines meant to be independent if needed... for the Divine Beasts, the Jester constructed his own tools to run them."

There were two Golem standing outside the Gates, stonewall and stoic, one spoke up, <Halt! Who goes there!>

The Beedrill lead the group to a clearing outside the forest, a sign up that had a no symbol over a humanoid shape.

<There is no negotiating, no humans allowed!> the Beedrill exclaimed, A Ariados came out, wearing glasses surprisingly.

<I'm sorry for the Guard, but I can explain everything.>

Oron Mountains

Hyp: <Can call Hyp. Or Blowback. Seeing if can help with Grand Palkia.>

"life is just a series of increasingly canon-eluding ao3 tags" ~ everydunsparce "Keep your hellfruit away from me, tempter" ~ also Every

Trial of Knowledge

Colt stared at the crystals and exhaled. He really should have known that a civilization this isolate would have a different system of reprogramming their guardians. Dude shoulda been aware some difference would bite him in butt.

For the third time that day,

Colton facepalmed.

Anyone lingering outside the cave, and roughly within a few miles of them as well would hear what sounded like a detonation from within the cave. The holographic crystals themselves would probably crack or distort from the sonic forces shoved on them, but who wouldn't crack?

A loose, thin layer of ice and sediment above their heads came flaking down and littered their feet.

"Jester worked for ya?" What reference should I use this time? He asked himself before realizing the irrelevance. "And where did that number come from?"

edited 19th Dec '17 8:18:19 AM by AbsentCoder

[Insert Unoriginal Stinger Here]

Trial of the Hollywood Hills

Cynthia: "So that Jester is a sentient material... Intesting."

Then facepalm.

"...How do you even do this."

Dominion Forest

A bolt of dust is settling right under Pent and compagny.

Suddenly, an explodion noise is heard!

Then suddenly...

"Pent you fucker I told you I got no FUCKING BIRD MONS!"

A Spinme fly on Pent and aims an uppercut on him, standing on a block of rock!

What's the use of money if you ain't gonna break the mold? Even at the center of fire, there is cold All that glitters ain't gold

Nimbasa — Last Night

Corrin: I am very grateful for your offer, Artoria. Thank you.

Mason: You may now kiss the bride. Now can you actually tell the guy who can't understand plant bugs what's going on?

Corrin: Oh, yes, of course. Artoria just offered to help me train to return to form, at least figuratively if not literally.

Mason: How many trainers are you trying to have?

Nimbasa, past

Neon: Er, sorry about that, I felt it was the best way but I guess I was wrong...

Poni Shore

Seishirou: Ha! We have GPS programs for that.

Fuuma: ...Let me guess, the Pokemon of your world tried to get rid of the humans or something?

Aspertia Gym

Cheren: Hey, Pidove are normal types!

-The Pidove is knocked back by the kick, but gets up, shakes themself off, and retaliates with another Wing Attack-

Forest

Gina: ...Explain what?

Trial Of Knowledge

-Kass is still writing stuff down-

Kass: <How did you get rid of him the first time?>

edited 19th Dec '17 10:38:02 AM by Umbramatic

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