Help with a Framing Device

So, I am working on a framing device where a man walks into town, gathers everyone around him, and tells a story, which is the main plot.

I have this framing device for reasons relating to foreshadowing, and a bit of a thematic reason. So I do not want to scrap it.

However, many of the people that reviewed it said that it lacked something, and was a bit dragging. Basically, it lacked a 'hook'

Unfortunately, I do not know how to make it interesting. It goes framing device, exposition (not a lot mind you, just a page or two in comic form) and then plot. There is no hook to it, and I need a way to give it that hook.

Help?

What is exactly the main story? It really depends on that. Is it Film Noir, Fantasy, etc?

Also, You could read some of the people who did it before to see how to make it work better: Chaucer, Gaiman and the like.

I'm guessing this character is either the protagonist or, at the very least, realted to the main character, right?

What you should do is to make everyone think this is the A plot in the story, that way you take the "Come on, get started" possibility righ out of the bat. Do you go in and out of the Framing device? Or do you stay with the A plot during the whole story?

edited 18th Jan '11 8:39:21 AM by juancarlos11

It's action/adventure/fantasy. The main story is an action shonen-esque travel story.

What you should do is to make everyone think this is the A plot in the story, that way you take the "Come on, get started" possibility righ out of the bat. Do you go in and out of the Framing device? Or do you stay with the A plot during the whole story?

Things I would do if this was me writing this story (so take 'em or leave 'em):

• Tell the story of the storyteller's approach from the townspeople's perspective. Get the reader interested in the storyteller because the villagers themselves are interested.
• Make sure the storyteller is as interesting visually as the story itself is.
• No Ending: End the story In Medias Res.

"But..." One of the children looked around, wondering why nobody else was saying anything. "But what happens next?"

The storyteller stood, dusting himself off. "I'll tell you," he said, "as soon as it happens."

edited 19th Jan '11 6:18:20 AM by BlackWolfe

Does he say the truth? Why does he say all these anyway? If you manage to make the reader interested to find out the answer to questions like that, you've got a hook.

Also, something interesting would be if there was still something that needs resolving, even if the events of his story are long gone. You could show from the beginning that the storyteller is in a hurry because there's something very important that must be done after this, for example. Or, even better, show that he is just stalling everyone with his story, distracting them while waiting for something to happen/someone to come. Basically, keep some tention even out of his story.

@Juan: It disappears for most of the story, except for a minor cut in the very end, and of course, the ending.

@Wolfe: Well, that would be an interesting idea, but I want a hook for the beginning, so by the ending, I should hope everyone is already 'hooked'

edited 19th Jan '11 8:39:46 AM by MrAHR

In many ways, your storyteller's plight is similar to yours (as in: I want to tell this story.). You could try to draw from that and either go meta (I don't know if you like that kind of thing) or, at the very least, make a point about it.

You have a great advantage, and it's the fact that the Framing Device has an inmediate hook (Who's this guy? And what role did he play in the story he's telling?) Everything else is pretty much execution.

Also, all the other answers have good points.

If you want, I can Beta-read it and comment further.

edited 19th Jan '11 10:31:57 AM by juancarlos11

That's been my goal from the start, actually. That was the entire point, it's a bit complicated, but it's almost an explanation to how plot seems to find characters. It's the thematic thing I mentioned in the original post (I think I mentioned it, at least). If you want to read it, just click the second link on my signature. Be warned, it's in graphic novel format.

edited 19th Jan '11 11:20:16 AM by MrAHR

Oh, great. It's just that seeing how some people around here seem to believe that meta is "The author wanking off on the page" I was scared of making such advice.

Anyway, reading what you have so far, I have to say that I don't see the problem. Then again, it's just my opinion.

Hmmm, OK. I guess it comes down to whose opinion I should trust the most, because for me, I've ran this through me head so many times it's hard for me to tell how good it is.

That'll always be the problem. As much as you plan and think, you cannot really trust your own opinion of your work.

AHR — you seem to have latched on to my favorite part of my list while ignoring the other two parts. Can't blame you. If you don't use that shit, I probably will.

Well ,that's because I already kinda used the other two parts.

Oh, well, then, there ya go.