General All-Purpose Crossover Fiction Thread

By the time Mikoto hesitantly entered the alley, a few minutes later, Juliet had wrapped the prey's head and upper body up tightly in her "webbing". (Nao was vaguely aware that the substance her Child shot out bore no real resemblance to spider webbing, but she wasn't the type to care about such things. Juliet had eight legs and six eyes and shot a sticky substance; therefore, she was a spider-girl.) His legs were free, but Nao had kicked them out from under him. So he rested with his butt on the ground before her, staring up at her with a terrified expression.

"Great, you already got the sword out," Nao said to Mikoto, who did. "Okay, same as last time, right?" She turned back to the prey and smiled winningly. "So here's the deal. I'm going to cut your mouth free, so that you can tell us all about what we want to know. Start screaming, or try and get to your feet, or kick me or something like that, and my good friend here is going to turn you into shishkebab. Right, Mikoto?"

"Uh," said Mikoto. "Well, I guess so."

Ignoring the uncertainty in her tone, Nao continued on. "But first, let's get some information that can't be a lie." Well, probably, she thought as she started fishing in his pants pockets, having put her claws back where they came from. His wallet came out easily enough, as did a surprise. "Oh, you brought some condoms!" Nao cooed. "Isn't that nice, Mikoto? He's out there trolling for girls for his master, but he's sweet enough to bring protection with him. What a great guy, wouldn't you say?"

"What are condoms?" Mikoto asked, looking a bit worried. "Are they some kind of defensive weaponry?"

Nao paused in her efforts to undo the prey's belt buckle, and turned to look back at her "good friend". "Seriously?"

"What?"

"You're in junior high school and you don't know what condoms are? Were you raised by wolves?"

"No," Mikoto said, genuinely baffled by the question. "I was raised by jii."

That probably rated further inquiry, but the truth was, Nao didn't really give much of a shit. "No, they're not a weapon," she said, turning back to her prey as she got his pants down around his hips, exposing his smelly boxers. Nao held up her right hand and called back the bright red claw that fit on it like a glove, so that he could see it.

"This is his weapon," she said then, as she brought the claw down gently on his boxers, and cut a hole in them to expose the weapon she was talking about. The weapon that she wanted to break so badly.

NAO'S FANTASIES OF GENITAL MUTILATION OMITTED

She took a shuddering breath as she forced herself to calm down. It was funny, really. Before she'd had Juliet in her corner, if she'd had a guy in this position and a weapon, say the boxcutter she'd carried around sometimes, she never would have hesitated to do all that and more.

But Juliet, in a strange sort of way, calmed her. She didn't know why. She had never had a pet spider or something like that, but there was something weirdly comforting about the creature's presence. As though what she'd really wanted all this time was someone in her corner.

Of course, that was such bullshit. She wanted lots of other things besides that.

Like bloody satisfaction.

She finally opened the wallet and took a look at the ID within. "Didn't even use your real name, tsk tsk tsk, shame on you, Kakizaki Shuutaro-san," Nao said, putting as much contempt into the honorific as she possibly could. "Oh, and look, Mikoto, he's got pictures of his wife and kid in here! Isn't that sweet? Isn't that the sweetest thing you've ever heard about? And she's so cute, too, just about our age, I think!"

"Uh —" said Mikoto.

"You fuck her, don't you?" Nao asked, still talking in the same cheerful tone. "Your daughter. Can't resist the sweet bird of youth, can you. I bet you love it when she cries, don't you? Love it when she screams. Love the fear and the pain in her voice. Love the power you have. It's so sweet, I bet." Needle-quick, she reached up to cut the strand of webbing around his mouth so he could answer her.

"No!" he shouted. "No, I don't, I'd never ever do such things, please, please, don't hurt me!"

"Oh, don't worry. We're not here to hurt you," Nao lied. "We're here to help you. We're gonna set you free of the sick urge that you've had for a while now. All you've got to do is tell us where it happened."

"What, what?"

"Where did you run into the thing that made you like this? Where is it hiding now?"

"I-I-I don't know what you're talking about!" the prey squealed like the pig it was.

Nao sighed in mock regret, and turned to look at Mikoto. She could tell that the other girl was right on the verge of open rebellion, so it was probably best to end this right now.

Unfortunately, Nao didn't want to do that. "You see how it is," she said, feigning regret. "He won't talk willingly. I really have no choice but to force it out of him. I'm really not enjoying this at all," she added, glorying in the oh so sweet lie. The truth of that spread across her face as she turned back to look right at him. "So I guess we've got to go there, then," she said, and brought her clawed hand down towards his manhood.

"Stop!" came a voice from behind her.

Mai had imagined Mikoto doing any number of things with Nao. Fighting had been prominent among those imagined activities. In wilder moments, she'd imagined them talking about feminine hygeine issues that Mikoto was too embarassed to discuss with her. The fact that she had trouble imagining Mikoto being embarassed about anything was the reason they were wild moments.

And, yes, she had considered the possibility that they would be doing to each other the sorts of things that Nao had done to her that first night they were together. She'd hoped that they wouldn't find them when that was going on. After would have been better. Before would have been ... just as good, Mai told herself. It wasn't as though she had any interest in stopping Mikoto from doing that sort of thing with people other than her.

She'd also expected that it would be a lot harder to find them. As soon as she and Natsuki had gotten into the downtown area, she'd outlined a complicated plan dividing it up into sectors to the more experienced girl, based on some things she'd seen in a movie once.

Natsuki had listened in silence, waiting until Mai ran out of things to say, then interjected, "Or we could do this." And called up Duran, gave him some instructions, and sent him up to start running on roofs. The robotic dog Child returned just a few minutes later, and after a moment of communion between him and Natsuki, the two girls were on their way.

"You can talk to him?" Mai asked as she ran just a few steps behind Natsuki.

"You can't talk to yours?" Natsuki asked back, her voice suggesting that she wasn't really interested in the answer.

Which was good, because Mai wasn't about to admit that she was too terrified of her so-called 'child' to call him up, much less talk to him.

In any event, she hadn't expected to find Mikoto so quickly, and she definitely hadn't expected that she was going to find her doing this sort of thing — standing guard over a man whose upper body was tied up like some sort of mummy, while his lower body was denuded of clothes and his, well, his business was exposed, and Nao leaning over him wearing some sort of clawed gloves. In the shadows, Mai could see some kind of spider-like creature leaning back against the wall and just observing, but for the moment, her attention was completely on Nao as she started to bring down her hand towards the man's genitals.

"Stop!" Mai shouted, panicked.

She saw Mikoto whirl, not pointing her sword at her, but looking back at her with a startled expression that swiftly turned to something else when she realized who it was. "Mai," Mikoto said. Oh, the expression was one of shame, wasn't it?

Mai found herself realizing that she didn't like seeing that expression there. What a strange time to be thinking such things.

"Smooth move, warning them before I could get off a stun shot," Natsuki hissed as she stood beside her, guns already out and pointed at them. She raised her voice as she continued. "Step away from that person, right now."

"Or what?" Nao sneered in response.

Natsuki's tactical sense pinged quite suddenly. She'd been expecting Mikoto to be the problem, here, but the fact that this Nao girl was staring down the barrel of a gun without qualm suggested that was an incomplete assessment. Her gloves and the Child both told her that she was another HiME. Another one that none of my sources had told me about.

"What are you doing, Mikoto," Mai asked, keeping her own attention firmly on her roommate.

Natsuki approved. Getting them talking was a sound tactical — oh, wait, this was Mai. She actually cared about the answers. Shit.

"This man, Nao told me that he was, well, possessed," Mikoto explained hesitantly.

"Possessed?" Mai asked. "Orphans can do that?"

"Never heard of it before," Natsuki supplied, eyes firmly on Nao, who was starting to smirk. That strongly suggested —

"Well, they're demons, right?" Mikoto asked. "Demons can do that."

"Wow, some people really will believe anything, won't they?" Nao said, smirk turning into a wide grin.

"Eh?" Mikoto said, turning to look at Nao.

"She lied to you, Mikoto," Mai shouted. "Okay, enough, why are you doing this? What is the —"

"Because I can!" Nao suddenly roared, all amusement gone from her face as it dissolved into fury. She still didn't know what it was about this girl that put her in such a confused state, but it didn't really matter. "Because I feel like doing it! That's the only reason any of them ever do anything, so why shouldn't I do the same?!"

"You ... lied to me?" Mikoto asked, genuinely bewildered now. "Why did you lie to me?"

"Why did you let me?" Nao snapped in response.

Slowly, Mikoto brought her sword around to point it at Nao. "Why did you lie to me?" she repeated, anger starting to become obvious in her voice.

"Because I could."

"Okay, enough of this Nietzchiean bullshit," Natsuki interrupted. "You're outnumbered, so step away from the guy, and —"

"Hostage," Nao interrupted sweetly, as she gently rested the talons of one her hands on his exposed member. "Snip snip. Instant phimosis cure. Unless you step away. Juliet, would you mind coming forward?"

The Child leapt, spider-like, in front of her, blocking Natsuki's line of fire and driving Mikoto tumbling backwards from Juliet's point of impact. Mai promptly ran forward to see if her friend was okay, and so left herself wide open to a strand of webbing directed at her, pinning her to the ground. Mai let out a shriek of disgust.

Okay, thought Natsuki. Serious threat.

"Now where was I?" Nao continued, turning her maniacal grin back to her prey. "Oh, yes. I was right here."

Finding them had been easier than Midori had had any right to expect. She'd been lucky enough to glimpse a mechanical dog bounding around on the rooftops, and, since this wasn't Fahrenheit 451, had concluded that it had to be connected. Getting up to the roofs herself had been fairly easy, given the enhanced strength and speed that came with her Element. That had really been the hard part.

She had watched the confrontation happening below with interest and a bit of dismay. One of the girls had a clear grasp of tactics, but the only one who had any sort of teamwork was the temporary antagonist! How messed up was that? And on top of it, the teamwork seemed to be trumping the tactics. Well, that was meet and right, but it was happening the wrong way!

Clearly, she was going to have to involve herself.

So she called up her axe, letting it burst up from the roof's surface, then gracefully leapt out into space to land just a few steps from where Nao was crouching over her hostage, behind Nao's Child. "I think this little farce has gone on long enough," Midori announced.

"Huh?" gasped Nao, rolling away from the still-bound civilian male. "Who the hell are you?"

Inwardly, Midori exulted. This girl couldn't be all bad, if she gave such wonderful straight lines! Obviously, they were just going to have to defeat her and then she'd be on their side! "Defender of the Town and the Gown!" she proclaimed. "The HiME of the Violent Wind, Sugiura Midori! For Justice, Love and Friendship! I'm gonna kick your ass!"

Nao visibly twitched. "Justice, love and — what are you, a twelve-year old boy?"

Okay, the befriending was obviously going to be a painful process for some of them. "As I was saying, I can no longer permit you to do these things — these things that even you yourself must surely regret on some level!"

"You're brain-damaged. That's it. That explains everything."

Clearly a tough case. "Mai-chan!" Midori called over her shoulder. "Are you all right yet?"

"What? Midori — no, no, I'm not! There's all this sticky gunk all over me and I don't know how to —"

"Have you tried calling up your Element and burning it off?"

Dead silence, then a whoosh that told Midori that she'd done just that.

"Okay, then," Midori said, turning back to Nao, who still hadn't moved. "You're back to being outnumbered. The three of them can certainly deal with your Child, and I have a clear shot at you. Furthermore —"

She threw her axe up into the air, dove into a sommmersault that took her in between Nao and the former hostage. She pushed him further away from Nao, ignoring for the moment his cry of pain as his genitals slammed into the ground in the process. Well, he did come out here looking for a date with a teenager, so he deserves a little karmic pain, she thought as she reached out to grab the axe as it dropped down again.

"— you don't have a hostage, anymore," she continued, and went into a low, defensive stance. "And claws might be very frightening, but if you can't get close enough to use them, you've got problems. So don't you think it might be about time to start talking about what's really going on here?"

Nao just glared at her. If looks could kill, and all that, but the glare was just a glare.

"You didn't really need Mikoto-chan's help for all of this," Midori pressed. "So why drag her into this scam of yours? Did you want a friend that badly?"

"Friend? Come on!" Nao sneered. "She was just a tool I used to get at that one!" This delivered with a sharp nod in the general direction of Mai, who was hovering in front of Juliet in the standoff that looked likely to continue for some time.

"Huh?" asked Mai. "What did I ever do to —"

"You piss me off!"

Mai started to get a little angry herself. "How did I manage to do that, this is the second time we've ever met!"

"But I had to listen to her whinging about what a wonderful person you are all night, last night, and it made me want to puke! All that rot about how nice you are, how kind you are, how powerful you are — when you're nothing more than a great big phoney!"

"What makes you think I'm a phoney?! We barely even know each other!" Mai shouted, having gone from angry to bewildered in record time. Nothing about this situation was making sense to her.

"I just know!"

"Were you just accusing me of being twelve?" asked Midori, who'd been following this exchange with interest. "Because you sound like you're about ten, right now."

"Fuck you!"

"Very mature."

"Fuck all of you! Juliet, with me!" And with that, she threw up her arm and shot lines from the claw on her hand that wrapped around the railing of a fire escape on the other side of the alley. With a tug, she was catapulted up into the night sky, with her Child following along behind her.

"Well," said Midori after a moment. "That could have gone better."

"Shouldn't you, I don't know, chase her or something?" Mai asked as she settled down to the ground again. She glanced in Mikoto's direction, seeing that she was following Nao's path of escape with her eyes. Her face showed obvious unhappiness.

Midori shrugged. "Why? I know where she lives. So do you, come to that. And anyway, like I said, we really shouldn't be fighting amongst each other. There are enough bad guys out there that the good guys need to work together."

Mai coughed. "I-I'm really not sure whether Nao qualifies as a good guy, so —"

"Eh, she's just the dark, brooding but ultimately ineffectual loner who needs to learn the value of friendship so that she can become part of the team," Midori assured her. "It happens all the time."

Natsuki was staring at her in disbelief. "You do realize that this isn't a magical girls show, right?"

Midori swiveled to meet her gaze. "We are hot chicks with superpowers. What sort of show do you think this is, then?"

"It's not any kind of a show!" Natsuki snapped.

"Then why did you —" Midori started to ask in a perfectly reasonable tone.

"Y'know what, shut up," Natsuki suggested. "I feel like I'm getting stupider every moment I talk to you. Mai, you owe me, and I'm gonna collect later —"

"Right, right," Mai agreed.

"Before you go, though, we really need to talk about teamwork," Midori continued.

"You are brain damaged," Natsuki groaned, having already turned to leave.

"And you're another tough case. Kind of like Nao, that way."

Natsuki froze, then turned to fix an awful glare on Midori. Said recipient accepted it without any visible concern. Without another word, Natsuki stomped away.

"Well, anyway, Natsuki-chan was right about one thing, it was really a bad move to announce yourself before you attacked. On the other hand, she could've warned you that's what she was planning on doing, so there's fault on both sides," Midori began to lecture.

"Um, well, I'm sorry, but is shooting someone in the back really a heroic thing to do?" Mai asked hesitantly.

"A heroic thing to do is what a hero does," Midori explained.

"... right," Mai said, deciding to humor the crazy person. "Um, what about that guy, is he —"

Midori took a moment to check on him. "Well, he's fainted. Which is convenient, because it'll make it easier for the people I call in to cast amnesia spells on him. I'll do that as soon as the two of you are out of the vicinity," she added, turning to look at Mai and Mikoto, who hadn't moved or said a word during any of this.

"You can do that?" Mai asked, not taking the hint.

"Working within the system does have its perks, whatever Natsuki-chan might think," she said. "I'll see you tomorrow, Mai-chan."

This time she got it. "Oh. Yes. C'mon, Mikoto."

The younger girl silently, obediently turned to follow Mai out of the alleyway.

Midori waited until they were both completely out of sight, before turning to look down the alley. "You can come out, now."

Slowly, a girl with hair just about as red as Midori's own poked her head out from behind a garbage disposal bin. "Uh, how long have you known I was —"

"I came from up there, remember. Clear view of the whole battlefield," Midori explained. "You're Asakura, right?"

"Asakura Kazumi," the teenager confirmed, standing the rest of the way up. "I'm with the school paper —"

"— and with Ala Alba. Yes, I know about that," Midori added pre-emptively. "And yes, I will explain what's going on. But it's for you guys' ears only, not the whole school. Konoemon-sensei will back me up on this."

A bit of elan crept back into Asakura's somewhat spooked expression. "Konoemon-sensei? You know the Headmaster that well?"

"Yes," Midori said. "Yes I do."

"— and with Ala Alba. Yes, I know about that," Midori added pre-emptively. "And yes, I will explain what's going on. But it's for you guys' ears only, not the whole school. All right?"

A bit of elan crept back into Asakura's somewhat spooked expression. "You're just going to explain it all? No tricks or evasions? You haven't been doing this very long, have you?"

Midori cocked her head to one side. "Has it occured to you that you might have been doing it just a bit too long?"

---

Halfway back to the dorm, Mai finally got fed up with Mikoto's silence. "Okay, are you going to keep this up forever?" she said, turning to look back at her roommate, who was trailing along behind her. "Am I going to have to drag it out of you?"

"'m sorry," Mikoto muttered.

"I'm not looking for an apology, I'd really prefer an explanation! Why were you going along with that stuff, Mikoto?"

"I thought that Nao liked me," the little girl said. "And ..."

Mai waited for the thought to be concluded. Eventually, she prompted. "And ... what?"

Mikoto was studying the ground with obvious interest. "And I thought we matched better than Mai and I do."

That rocked her. "Huh?" she asked weakly.

Still staring at the sidewalk, Mikoto continued. "Mai doesn't like fighting Orphans. Nao said that she did. So we matched. We liked the same things. I thought we did, at least."

Mai was almost completely floored. She didn't like fighting, period, but she thought that she'd hidden her discomfort with this whole situation. Clearly, she'd underestimated how well Mikoto could read her.

And with that thought came a sudden sense of shame. "I drove you to this, didn't I?" she asked quietly. "I pushed you to make friends, and the first one you made was a liar and a trickster."

Mikoto didn't disagree, any more than she looked up.

Mai let out a long sigh. "Now I'm sorry, Mikoto. You're right, I don't like fighting. But it's a funny thing, you know. I always told myself that I'd have no problem fighting if it was for someone who was important to me. But I'm just now realizing something."

Now Mikoto uneasily peeked up. "What?"

"You're important to me, Mikoto," she told her, smiling.

Now her head came the rest of the way up. "Mai!"

"From now on, when you need someone to come with you on these hunts of yours, I'll do it. Midori is ... well, kind of nuts, but she's right about teamwork. Do you still want to be a team with me, Mikoto?"

All shame banished, Mikoto nodded rapidly and then, well before Mai could brace for the impact, tackled her with a hug that rammed her face into Mai's breasts. "Mai!" she exclaimed again, nuzzling.

Mai struggled to keep her feet, but once she was steady, she gently hugged Mikoto back. Well, she thought. I guess I am a magical girl, after all. Or something.

---

Phonies, Nao sneered from the rooftop, looking down at the pair of phonies hugging each other in public. What a load of crap. You matter to me. Liar. Nobody really gives a damn about anyone else.

With a gesture, she sent Juliet back into the shadows, and easily made her way home, ignoring the other pair of phonies that she found asleep under a blanket on her dorm room's couch. She quickly entered the closet that she'd claimed as her bedroom, closed the door and locked it using the lock she'd bought online.

Security established, she started to settle down to sleep, thinking grim thoughts about what she'd do to all of them if she ever got a chance. (All of them, in this case, was pretty much the population of Japan.)

As she was doing so, her cell phone buzzed. With effort, she got into character and answered it. "Hello?" she asked, sounding like a sickly sweet teenaged girl.

"Ah, Nao-chan. I'm glad that I finally caught you."

Nao groaned. "What do you want?" she said, abandoning the character.

"I'm just calling to let you know that I'll be in Mahora during the festival they have there, on other business, and I might be able to stop in and see you —"

"Don't strain yourself," she said, and hung up.

Asshole, she thought. Looking back on it, half the reason she'd gotten so mad at tonight's victim was that he'd reminded her of him.

Why couldn't he have been there that day, instead of her mother?

---

When the two of them finally got back to their apartment, Mai discovered that there was a message on the landline's voice mail.

"Hello, Mai-chan, it's me," said her father's voice. She groaned, but listened all the same. "I'm sorry that I didn't catch you this evening. I'm just calling to let you know that I'll be in Mahora during the festival that they have there, on other business, and I might be able to stop in and see you and Takumi-kun while I'm there. Let me know when would be a good time for you. Good night." Beep.

Mai considered just erasing the message and forgetting all about it, but something stayed her hand. First of all, spending time with her family would be a good excuse to be with Takumi, as she hadn't had the chance to do in quite a while. Secondly ... well, she still didn't like him, but maybe he did deserve another chance.

Admittedly, she thought she might just be thinking that because of that guy that Nao had mugged this evening. He'd reminded her of her father, just a bit ...

NEXT: Akane.

Like so.

Standard issue disclaimer: Sunrise created and owns Mai-Hime. I am not them. This is a parody, protected speech.

Disturbing Routines
Chapter Four: Akane

June, 2004

The sun shining brightly through the window of her bedroom slowly brought Higurashi Akane awake, and, as teenage girls are wont to do, she started to stretch without opening her eyes. Somewhat atypically, however, she froze before she'd really gotten started doing so, and let the eye that wasn't pressed into her pillow slide open to check her surroundings.

A moment later, she let out a sigh of relief. She was alone in bed. As it happened, that was not always the case when she woke up. Which was somewhat troubling, and not really to her liking, but she liked even less what happened when she woke up and stretched her way into hitting the other body in bed with her.

It was not pleasant to contemplate, let alone experience.

But it hadn't happened today, which was a reason to celebrate. So she did. Just ... quietly, and privately, in her own mind.

She got out of bed, then, and reviewed her desktop calendar. There was another reason to celebrate, actually. Today was the first day of this year's Mahora Fest, held a couple of weeks earlier than usual in response to various events. (The three instances of dangerous strangeness last year, in other words. Akane had only been witness to two of them, but that had been one too many for her school spirit, thank you.)

And she'd made a decision about this year's Mahora Fest a while ago. Today was the day that she was going to tell Kazuya-kun everything. Everything, but most importantly, she was going to tell him that they weren't just good friends who were having good times together.

"I love you, Kazuya-kun," she said, practicing. Maybe just a little too formal? "I love you, Kazuya," she repeated, this time experimenting with yobisute. It would work. She was sure of his feelings for her.

Pleased with herself and confident, she got dressed in her waitress outfit and headed downstairs to have some breakfast before she headed out and —

Her father was sitting at the kitchen table, reading the newspaper. He looked up at her through his glasses as she froze in the entrance to the doorway. The words "Good morning" went conspicuously unsaid.

"Oh," said Akane. "Uh. I thought you were still at work."

"I have a short break," he said at length. "I probably won't be back again for the next few days, though. This festival nonsense is going to be keeping me fairly busy."

"I see," she said. She didn't really, but that was just the sort of thing that you said to statements like that. She honestly had no idea what her father did for a living, except that it must pay very well, for him to be able to afford this house and the two cars in his garage. Not to mention allowing him the influence to see to it that she lived here, with him, instead of at one of the school's dorms.

"Well," Akane said into the silence that followed. "I should probably get going myself, since I have to work, too, and —"

Her father stood up and began to undo his belt buckle. "Bend over," he said.

"But I have to get to school," she said, conscious of how faint her voice sounded.

"I don't care," he told her. "Bend over."

Eventually, she did just that.

NUMEROUS ACTS OF DUBIOUS CONSENT OMITTED

She didn't look up, even when she heard the zipper being pulled up, even when he walked away without saying a word, and even when she heard the door to the garage open and then close. She just stood — well, lay, technically — there for a while.

Idly, she wondered if she'd be late if she took a shower. Well, if that was the case, she was just going to have to be late. She'd been late often enough, over the last four years, that once more really wouldn't make a difference.

Freed from such concerns, Akane let her mind wander a bit, remembering another time that she'd been left lying on the kitchen table like this, and her mother had walked in. For a dizzying few seconds, she'd enjoyed a sensation of hope, that her mother would finally realize what was happening and do something.

And then she'd heard her mother snort and say, "Better you than me."

A year or so later, when her mother had died in what everyone said was a car crash, she'd whispered the same words to her memorial. She'd hoped to feel pleasure in the ironic repetiton. She hadn't. It hadn't been until she met Kazuya that pleasure came back to her.

She couldn't wait to tell him everything.

"Ah, man, I loves me some Mahora Fest," Midori commented happily as she watched the festivities get underway from the main window of Chao Bao Zi. "I hope this year is even crazier than last year."

Mai, who was beginning to get just a tad bit weary of hearing about 'last year's Mahora Fest', was obscurely pleased when Satsuki politely informed Midori that she didn't think that was too likely.

"Dare to dream, Sacchin!"

Satsuki frowned, indicating once more her dislike of that particular nickname.

"Sorry, sorry."

Mai shook her head in annoyance at the antics of the diner's self-proclaimed "best customer" as she tried to keep her focus on the orders she was supposed to be taking from the enormously expanded dining area set up for the festival.

She hadn't been terribly impressed by Midori when she'd found out that the older woman was a 'hime', since she viewed her as possibly the most un-princess-like out of all of the ones that she'd met so far — which was astounding when one considered Mikoto and Nao! And the low opinion had gotten lower in the weeks since she'd shown up as their new history teacher. Okay, so she clearly knew the subject backwards and forwards, but the way that she dressed! The way that she acted! What kind of weird teacher dressed and acted like that!

"Satsuki-saaaan!" called a short boy in glasses and a green suit walking past the diner and waving frantically, accompanied by a bored looking little girl in a frilly dress and a pair of teenagers, one in nekomimi and glasses and the other clearly a robo-cosplayer. "Keep up the good work!"

Okay, so Midori clearly didn't have the market covered on being a weird teacher, but still. All that would have been bad enough, but then she added to it by acting like she wanted to be Mai's best friend-slash-aunt agony. Admittedly, as a former coworker, she supposed that she should be friendly with Midori, but not to the point where she told her everything that was wrong with her life. Or took advice from her on how to be a magical warrior of justice or whatever.

Mai also felt pretty sure that Midori, or the people who employed her, had some sort of agenda. Natsuki had explicitly told her that when they'd met up the day after their introduction, adding that Mai shouldn't trust Midori even a little bit.

"But you have an agenda, too," Mai had pointed out, she thought quite reasonably.

"Yes, and you shouldn't trust me, either," Natsuki had replied.

"... you don't trust me, do you." It hadn't been a question.

"Not even a little bit."

"Who do you trust?"

There'd been such a bizarre expression on Natsuki's face as she answered. "No one."

"How can you live like that?"

"By reflecting on the fact that if I try to live any other way, I won't live very long."

"Well, I can't."

"Eh? Why not? It seems like a pretty simple order," Aoi asked.

Mai blinked, came back to herself, and then laughed nervously. "Sorry, sorry. Got lost in thought for a moment there." Agggggh. I suck so much! "I'll get that order right to our cook."

"Um ... aren't you going to ask me what I want?" Chie asked, sitting on the other side of the table.

"I want Mai's ramen," Mikoto supplied.

Well, at least she could take comfort in the fact that, since that episode, Mikoto had started to warily socialize with Mai's other friends, to the point where she was now comfortable with the idea that they were going to be taking her around the festival while Mai worked and then reunited with her father. She set aside her discomfort about that latter part as she turned to look at her roommate and shook her head. "Sorry, Mikoto, but I haven't graduated to chef here. But the one we have is probably better than me."

Mikoto stared at her. She could almost see the words Mai says weird things sometimes in a thought baloon over her head.

"Trust me," she said, got Chie's order and headed back to counter. Things were so busy today, and it really didn't help matters that Akane had called in to say that she was going to be late for her shift. Fortunately, they did have two temps hired for just today.

"Uniform suits you," she told one of them as they met each other heading up to the counter.

"Shaddap," suggested Yuuichi.

"Maybe I should put in a suggestion about having the student council institute a special uniform for their lackey."

"Shaddap."