Should i give up on being Social?

So ever since I've started my new school, (where the cultural differences are so extremely different I can only have a few friends I can get along with), Ive become extremely less social, going from like sixty coontacts on my phone to only twenty five due to everyone just basically forgettig about me. No one texts me anymore, and when I do text someone they ignore the text, which before a a month or two ago never happened. My facebook posts go ultimately unnoticed, with all 186 of my friends just ignoring them. So, should i just give up and just embrace antisocialism?

edited 22nd Nov '10 5:56:27 PM by cutewithoutthe

No, generally acting like a maladjusted dick isn't going to get you anywhere.

Being asocial, however, might not be so bad.

maladjusted? How can i adjust to it when everyoe does drugs and are like 75% likely to be in a gang? This school is smack dab in the middle fo the ghetto.

Mellon was being pedantic about 'antisocial' being used when the right word for it is 'asocial'.

Oh. True. I still had to make that clear, though, that in this school there is no hope in adjusting.

If you're already convinced that everyone at your school is so terrible then there's nothing I can do for you. Good day.

Adapt or die.

That's how our ancestors did it, that's how my father did it, and its worked out pretty well so far.

Then become gangsta? guess i can try, but i dont believe I have the bling. And sorry, mellonCollie, i didnt mean to snap like that. i do like your username!! :D

edited 22nd Nov '10 6:31:30 PM by cutewithoutthe

Switching schools made me more social, but still I had the experience of meeting lots of new people who already no each other (My group of friends was there though). Honestly, it sucks you go to an intercity school. Did you move far? It's no too late to reach out toyour old friends, is it?

Well, last year i also moved to a different school; I went from Public school to private School. That school went fairly well for me. Then, I switched to this one this year. I havent physically moved, but the work at home usually keeps me from going anywhere on the weekends, so I have to do most my soicialising at school. The ones I usually talked to in private School are basically just "letting me go", as if you HAVE to go to the same school to be able to socialise with them.

If they're that quick to drop you, they probably weren't very good friends to begin with. I know, I know, that doesn't really help.

I notice that you seem to define your social interaction by texts and facebook. Perhaps this is part of the problem.

Also, being asocial is harder than it looks. Everyone needs SOMEONE to talk to.

i know, but Facebook and texts were kind of the last chain i had anchored down to everyone because due to family probelems i never seem to have enough time to actually hang with anyone. But i hear college is pretty social....

You do not actually have to "convert" into something else or whatever. You can simply avoid such people while remaining generally socially available.

I would be surprised if there was no one in the area in a similar position. The difficulty would be in finding them.

If you want to avoid the gangs, the first answer that comes to mind is to find a group that plays tabletop roleplaying games. Comics nerds and anime fans could work, too, but they're not always as easy to locate.

Alternately, look for someone who eats lunch alone, sit down beside her, and ask her about her day.

Tabletop Roleplayying games are.....uncommon here....to say the least.

^ Yeah, but gamers advertise. If you can find a store that sells the games, you can find postings from gaming groups that need a new player. If you can't find such a store, well, there's always Craigslist.

That reminds me, look up "communities" on Craigslist.

edited 24th Nov '10 1:11:07 AM by feotakahari

I, bizarrely enough, sympathize with you, TC. Although, for me it was every school I went to and the "friends" I had turned out to be backstabbing jerks. Between a combination of that and Asperger's Syndrome, I just ended up giving up. Being asocial isn't that bad, really.

If you're serious about being asocial, do you have an idea of how your daily lifestyle would be like?

What would it be like?

While I cannot attest for the topic creator, I can, however, offer you this:

Being asocial is somewhat of an oxymoron. Humans are social beings and as such will seek out interactions with others. No one can fully withdraw themselves from society willingly. There will still be a select few (very few) outside of your immediate family that you'll still interact with on a regular basis that you could possibly call friends. However, how deep this friendship is will very. For normal people, it's hard to say. For people like me who have Asperger's Syndrome or some other form of autism, then these "friendships" are usually formed simple because that person amuses you. Unwittingly or not, you use them simply to distract you from the world.

The repercussions of that is simply them possibly hating you when you have no need for them anymore and generally ignore their text messages/Facebook posts/emails. However, since you no longer care about society nor a majority of those in it and said friendship was superficial anyway, it shouldn't bother you.

An upside to being asocial is that you have no qualms about using someone else to further your goals.

Really, even something like posting on a forum or joining a RP is simply out of boredom. That and to satisfy that part of you that still craves human interaction.

Hope this helps in some way.