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This is a "Wild Mass Guess" entry, where we pull out all the sanity stops on theorizing. The regular entry on this topic is elsewhere. Please see this programme note.
When In Doubt Obliviate
Lockhart comes to see Harry as his own instead of just a way to get good publicity
  • While not really a “wild” theory, Lockhart could have just hired a nanny to do the raising of Harry. But he actually did the father thing: potty-training him, teaching him, and worrying about him. Also, compared to a lot of other characters, Lockhart is surprisingly honest with him. It’s kind of sad that the gloryhound with ulterior motives is a far better parent then his blood relations. It was already hinted in Chapter 1 as, upon learning how Dumbledore wanted Harry to be raised (isolated from the Wizarding World), Lockhart said that he'd adopt Harry out of sheer altruism.
    • Then again, Lockhart might have been afraid the nanny might have suspected something.
    • A foreign, muggle nanny would suspect their identity?

Who is going to be the DADA professors?
  • With Lockhart already the defense professor in Harry’s first year and Quirrell obliviated that means we are short a professor. Who will Dumbledore hire and what year(s)?
    • Sirius Black in 2nd year [already precedence for him as a professor, see Oh God Not Again]
    • Remus Lupin in 2nd year [and Sirius Black in 3rd year]
    • Snape in second year and somebody to replace him as Potions Master

After his tenure as DADA professor, Lockhart is going to be the History of Magic professor at least one year
  • There are hints to it in the text, like an entire conversation about how boring the course is (while taught by Binns), Lockhart thinking that he’d prefer to teach History to DADA because it wouldn’t require the use of magic, and he has shown an aptitude with historical fact [King Hedwig].
    • Not to mention it'd be another excuse to get students to buy his books.

He'll teach Muggle Studies
  • Muggleborn and famous.
Walking in the Shadow of DreamsWMG/Fan FicWinter War

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