PART 1:
Deep under the Groom Lake facility, more commonly known as Area 51, scientists are hard at work at a variety of computers. One scientist is upset that his associate, Jordan Looseman, appears to have overslept, but as he is saying this, Jordan appears, a radiation suit covering his body. With the warning to be careful when connecting a stone to devices, Jordan gets into an elevator that leads to a lab, the computer room an observation lab above him.
Taking a remote, Jordan puts a stasis field around a orange crystal and hooks it up to several wires. He then puts a stasis field around a glittery black stone and beings moving it to the orange crystal. He stops when one of the scientists observing reports strange readings coming from the sample, but the head scientist makes the readings decrease. Jordan moves the sample again, but it freezes in place, the strange reading returning stronger than before, the scientists unable to handle it.
The orange and black samples start sharing energy, the scientists wondering if magic is real as the orange sample cracks and disappears. Jordan sees a single eye and hears a woman's voice say fun won't hurt the past, a white light coming from somewhere. The light disappears, six men in ancient armor now in the lab, three in red and gold, the other three with cloth and leather. One of the latter calls for General Tzu, the light returning and shattering glass as the two sides begin to do battle, Jordan silently watching, wondering what he and his associates have done.
In the small town of Rachel, Nevada, Dipper gives his friends pay-per-minute phones, the posters around town not helping him contain his excitement. Mabel tells her friends one of the things on Dipper bucket list is Area 51, Dipper exploding in theories, gesturing at the alien posters decorating the town. His phone buzzes, Dipper putting Zander on speaker as he confirms he's sending them to the Groom Lake facility.
Zander tells them this one is dangerous and they need to be quick about it, informing them magic is building up fast, and Graupner has disappeared from his radar. He also tells them he thinks Graupner is stocking up on his own stash of Starkissed, and he could literally do anything with that kind of power. Telling Wendy wraiths have hope, he hangs up, and the four of them start the drive to the facility.
As he drives, Dipper contemplates how they will get to the facility unseen, well aware of the amount of security present. He is also aware that the security team most likely doesn't have defenses against magic, and he is more than willing to use the spells in the Journals, despite Zander's insistence that Magic is corruptive. Seeing NO TRESPASSING and other danger signs, the four of them pull over, Dipper hiding the Journals from Mabel as he gets out of the car, knowing she feels the same way Zander does about Magic.
Warning everyone to stay together and stay away from security antennas at any cost, the four and pig begin the hike towards the facility. Soos disappears behind them near the top of a steep hill and Mabel discovers a lizard, naming it Tourniquet on the spot. Soos comes back up, a long piece of metal with a camera on the end in his hands. He and everyone else slowly realize he pulled an antenna out of the ground, and it is more than likely still recording.
Wendy, Dipper and Mabel all take cover, Mabel protecting her pets. Soos stays standing, the antenna in front of him, hoping the security won't risk destroying their tech. Wendy realizes that the camera probably saw them a long time ago, Dipper noting that, if security hasn't shown up yet, it probably never will, meaning something is very wrong at the facility. Whistling reaches their ears, the six of them watching as arrows hit the ground near them.
From the direction of the base, men in leather start rushing at them, two firing arrows as one hollers 'For Wu. Wendy takes one of the arrows in her hand, the other missing as the men arrive. When they are close enough, Mabel hurls Tourniquet at one of the men's faces, the others attempting to remove the lizard from their captain's face. Mabel kicks out at the men, Soos using the antenna as a bat to knock out the archers who almost got a jump on her.
Dipper informs the others the men are ancient Chinese soldiers, the only explanation being time travel. Mabel tells Waddles to head back to the car, the four people continuing to walk towards the base. They arrive at the top of a valley, men doing battle below them. Sneaking down the hill as they get closer, Dipper realizes the Chinese are fighting Roman soldiers. At first thinking this is a good thing, his mind changes when Romans fire a ballista bolt at them, Wendy and Dipper rolling into the middle of the Chinese army during the scatter, Soos and Mabel nowhere in sight. Confirming she trusts him, Dipper pulls out the Journal, telling Wendy to not tell Mabel about what he's about to do.
PART 2:
On the Roman side, Mabel and Soos are fighting, the latter unwillingly. They both take a moment to complain about the pain of punching faces, the Romans taking the chance to surround them. Hands in the air in surrender, a man warns them they will be killed if they resist. As two others tie rope around their hands, none other than Julius Caesar himself steps forward, telling them they will be cleaning armor after the battle. Mabel and Soos tell him slavery is no longer a thing and they have to save the world, but he just laughs and leads the way to a neutral zone. Soos apologizes for distracting Mabel and getting them trapped, but Mabel assures him Dipper has control over everything.
Gilligan Cut to Dipper decidedly not in control of anything, a clothing-torn Wendy defending him while he flips through the Journal. She realizes what he is doing, Dipper insisting that he can't keep up physically and he needs to use magic to defend them. She tells him to do his thing, Dipper reading from the book Aes Appareo, Telum Tutor, Circulus Cingo. A circle of light surrounds him and Wendy, the weapons turning on their masters when the Chinese enter the circle.
Weapons floating around them, Dipper and Wendy watch the Romans and the Chinese form a perimeter around the light circle. The Chinese archers pull back on their bows, one of the Romans ordering to get a ballista bolt ready. Unwilling to risk the ballista breaking through the spell, Dipper does the only logical thing- surrender.
Wendy is confused, but agrees to go along with Dipper's plan as one of the Chinese step forward, asking which side they surrender to. Dipper, recognizing the man as Sun Tzu, starts having a nerdy panic attack, which is not helped by Julius Caesar walking out of the Roman lines. The two leaders encourage Dipper to pick a side, Dipper recording on his phone when the men begin bantering about their battle tactics.
Wendy interrupts the banter and requests she and Dipper be set free instead of picking a side to surrender to. Sun Tzu reminds her they are trapped, but Dipper realizes that if the two sides had been able to continue the fight, they would have. With his spell stopping the battle in it's tracks, Dipper requests the two leaders to agree to a day-long ceasefire, threatening to use stronger spells if they refuse.
The two leaders agree and tell Wendy and Dipper to go to a neutral zone as the lines separate. They begin walking to the actual facility, Dipper warning Wendy that odds are good the ceasefire won't hold for very long. They enter the facility, a group of scientists near a half-fixed plane, soldiers on guard. Mabel hug attacks Dipper, she and Soos telling him and Wendy that the scientists refuse to talk to them.
Dipper tells the scientists about the ceasefire, Mabel doubtful that he was able to organize that by just talking to the leaders. Wendy lies that that's what happened, Mabel satisfied but Wendy not entirely thrilled. One of the scientists asks them who they are, Dipper not revealing this but mentioning Starkissed, the scientist's lack of poker face confirming that one is nearby.
The scientist doubts their intentions, unwilling to reveal the secrets of Area 51. Dipper says he and his friends have probably already net half the secrets, telling the group Wendy is undead and they had an alien friend called Yuki. The scientists react at the word Xabvri, Yuki's species, and hold a rushes conversation. Eventually the huddle breaks up, the scientist from before, Doctor Finer, agreeing to work with them.
Finer tells them there are scientists under the surface fighting soldiers from both sides, but if they can get past the guards, they might be able to return them to the proper time. He explains that they were given a sample of Starkissed to study, but everything went wrong when it connected to their equipment. However, if the connection is broken, the soldiers will return to their proper time, paradox-free.
The sounds of fighting starts up again outside, the two armies apparently back at it already. Dipper considers using magic to distract the guards, but Mabel encourages him he can do it without magic. He almost tells her about what he did earlier, but a distraction appears, a radiation-suited man with a crowbar attacking the Chinese men. They take the chance to take out the Romans, the crowbar man walking up after all the guards are dealt with.
Finer introduces Looseman to the group, Looseman confirming that he has a way underground. He leads everyone to a ladder that leads to a service room, Dipper's nerd-joy dying out as he realizes the base isn't as modern or technologically advanced as he had hoped. Finer takes the rest of the scientists to where the power source of the machine the Starkissed is currently hooked up to is, Jordan leading Soos, Wendy and the twins to where the actual sample is located.
Roman soldiers start rushing at them, but they make it into an elevator in time. They take it down to arrive in the computer-filled observation room from the Cold Open, the glass that used to protect it from the lab below shattered. The five look down to see the Starkissed as the elevator heads back up. Jordan points to an elevator leading to the lab, Dipper deciding to go with him and get the Starkissed now rather than help Mabel fight the Romans and wait for Finer to cut the power.
The elevator opens, the room charged with power, a bubble around the Starkissed, Dipper frantically taking notes in the Journal. Jordan tells Dipper they have to wait for the power to cut, both of them looking up through the broken window to the observation room when Mabel asks Dipper for help. Jordan tries to breach the bubble and grab the Starkissed, but he is thrown backwards.
Unwilling to wait for the power to cut while his sister and friends fight Romans, Dipper steps into some shadows and looks through the Journal, eventually finding a protection spell. With the words Aura Alumni, Tueor Tenerior, Scutum Contemtim, he casts it on himself, allowing him to enter the bubble and grab the Starkissed. The power does throw him backwards towards Jordan, but the sound of excitement from above is proof enough of his success in returning Julius Caesar, Sun Tzu, and all their men to the proper time.
Dipper lies to Mabel that Jordan grabbed the Starkissed, unwilling to tell her about his magic use. Not wanting to get locked up, the four of them head back to the cars, Waddles waiting for them. Mabel asks Dipper how it feels having entered the base of Area 51, Dipper admitting that the lack of information about aliens or the more common theories is disappointing as everyone stares behind him in shock. He turns around just in time to see a flying saucer disappear at the speed of light, angrily ranting that he missed his chance, Mabel explaining to her friends that it's just 'Nerd-Rage.'
Deep in the base, Jordan is upset that he was left behind when everyone else evacuated the base, the punishment for letting outsiders in severe. As the flying saucer the others took was the main power source for the base, Jordan is shocked at the discovery of a beeping coming from a still lit screen. He watches as the words The weight of the past shall break the back of the now appear on the screen, then disappear, the screen turning off. Wondering if he imagined it or not, a chill goes down his spine when he hears the echoes of laughter.
Cryptograms:
Bnlancb jan tnyc, onnurwpb unoc rwcjlc, bxxw lxvn lajbqrwp frcq cqn fxaum bnnw cqn ojlc.
Secrets are kept, feelings left intact, soon come crashing with the world seen the fact.
Kzgiloormt gsv Nlqzev zonlhg nzpvh blf drhs uli z Tizergb Uzooh Drmgvi.
Patrolling the Mojave almost makes you wish for a Gravity Falls Winter.
4-5-1-4-12-9-5-19-20 23-1-18-18-9-15-18, 1-14-25-15-14-5? Deadliest Warrior, anyone?
Sezxph fb prjb gzjs ticgy phv siqbo ow kwrru. Acjw, fviedsmf kk crct mfqr ivtokevvj, gcl jemvz fviedsmf kk df kpok phzj bwda ow pmoi. Fujk i tieeeutm iamzelsi. Keyword Weight of past sins crush the backs of today. Also, remember to call your relatives. You never remember to do that this time of year. Just a friendly reminder.
