RIP Moira Rose
Johnny accepts flowers that have been delivered and Moira assumes they are from him for her. He says they aren’t. He reads the card, which says sorry for your loss, she was really something. They are confused. Alexis comes in and says thank god, the internet says you are dead. Moira asks if they are still saying it, and David looks at his phone and says that it doesn’t help that Alexis tweeted out “Goodbye to a great actress” with a cool sunglass emoji. Alexis says the sunglasses are because she’s mourning. Moira asks what the source of this falsehood is and what photo are they using. David replies, unclear and a headshot from the 90s. So, she’s fresh and young and permed. Alexis remarks that it isn’t even trending. Moira opens the door for Stevie with pink carnations and says that someone dropped them off and she’s assuming Moira isn’t dead. Moira laments that the camels back is broken: “Who sends pink carnations?”
Johnny goes to the front desk and Roland consoles him with a hug. Johnny says she’s not dead, and Roland says the news hit him hard. He was worried about what would happen to the baby if something happened to him and Jocelyn. He says he wants Johnny to be Roland, jr ’s godfather. Johnny says what? Roland says they are best friends, and Johnny is skeptical.
At the Town Hall, Twyla is crying and being consoled by Ronnie and Jocelyn. She says she just saw Moira, but you know her thing with ghosts. But she didn’t seem angry like the other ones, and she talks about Moira’s Daytime People’s Choice Awards. Moira arrives and they are shocked to see her, and Moira says she was the most projected nominees to never have one. The Jazzagals are happy Moira is allowed, and Moira says the internet is to blame for the rumors of her death. She also reads some of the flattering obituaries. Moira then tries to tease flattery out of the other women. Ronnie offers that Moira always kept things interesting.
David and Alexis are driving in the Rose car, and she is thanking him for taking her out because she needs it with everything that is going on with their mom. He asks if that is it or is it because they are on a buying trip and will get free samples. Alexis is delighted and they banter about the peanut butter treats they have been eating and the cheese they will eat. David says this is a potentially important vendor for him, and she is very picky about her retailers. Alexis figures out that the cheese vendor is Heather Warner, the woman who Ted is dating. David says he can’t have her personal drama interfering with his business, but she refuses to walk home. He tells her to stay in the car, but she doesn’t. Heather greets them.
Johnny and Roland are at the cafe, and Johnny says he’s been thinking about the offer to become the godfather. Roland says it’s an offer he can’t refuse. Roland thinks the quote is from Casino and not The Godfather, and Johnny corrects him. Johnny also assumes the godfather position is honorary. Roland says no, Johnny would have to raise Roland, jr. if something happened to him and Jocelyn. Roland also says he’s thinking of getting Jocelyn his and hers cliff diving lessons for her birthday. Twyla also bring Roland an extremely unhealthy lunch. Johnny tries to say he’s worried about Roland’s lifestyle choices, and Roland almost chokes.
David and Alexis are at a picnic table outside of Heather’s. David says it is quite the spread, and Alexis agrees. Heather apologizes for being hard to pin down and says they are a family run business and there is apprehension about branching out. David says that he is also part of a family run business, and he says Alexis is his sister. Heather says she thought David’s business partner was male. David says yes, but Alexis is an intern. Alexis replies that she is in training to be CEO of executive buying. David pitches partnering to extend Heather’s customer base. Heather says she loves David’s store but she has been approached by a couple of other retailers she has to consider. Alexis replies, “Someone is in demand, isn’t she? Because this cheese is amazing.” Heather brags about her prize winning goats and the fact that she is dating a vet. She also recognizes Alexis’s voice, and Alexis demurs. David compliments the blue cheese, and Heather invites them for lunch. Alexis says no, but David says yes. Heather also says her boyfriend will join them. David then tries to get out of it, but Heather calls for Ted. Ted emerges, and Heather asks him to set the table. Ted sees Alexis and David, and they look awkward.
Moira is at her laptop looking at the comments about her on social media, delighted by the grief. Stevie knocks and comes in. She says a reporter is outside. Moira asks how many reporters and gets nervous. She worries about this not being the right way to emerge, insulting the motel in the process. She is filled with panic.
David is enjoying the lunch spread and thanking Heather. Ted looks pained and Alexis looks glum. David says he didn’t know Heather did prepared foods, and she says she doesn’t, she just made lunch. Ted says her quiche is egg-cellent. Heather asks how Ted and Alexis know each other. Ted stutters that she used to be his receptionist. Heather says that’s how she knows Alexis’s voice. David calls the quiche vivacious. Heather thanks Alexis for passing along all the messages that allowed her to connect with Ted. She says she feels like she owes Alexis. Alexis says David is looking for exclusivity on her products. Heather smiles and says she’s good. She says she’s in. David says she’s one of their finest interns.
Moira is talking to Stevie about what to say to the reporters while talking to Stevie. Stevie encourages her to tell the truth, to tell her own story in her own words.
Johnny is at Roland and Jocelyn’s house, talking to Jocelyn feeling like it might get awkward. Jocelyn says Roland has been asking everyone to be the godfather. Jocelyn says he’s the third person she’s had to talk to today. Johnny is relieved, and Jocelyn says that his first two kids were not a walk in the park. Johnny is hurt and say they were good kids. She replies he had a lot of help. He says he and Moira were capable parents. She offers to move him up the list. He says no.
David and Alexis are driving home. She looks out the window, sad. He says that went well. She agrees. He says she didn’t have to do that. She says she hates how good the cheese is. He thanks her, and he knows it was uncomfortable. She says she’s glad Ted’s found someone so stable and healthy. He says, you’re in love with him, aren’t you. She says, yeah.
Moira, in a wild leather outfit and golden wig, is ready to make her appearence to the reporters, but they are gone. Stevie, who is weepy, says there was another death. Cuppy the kitten. Who got stepped on by her best friend, a Giraffe. Moira claims to be relieved. Stevie says that it was nice how many people had nice things to say about Moira. If she died, she’s be lucky if one person had something nice to say. Moira says Stevie has years ahead of her to collect adoring mourners. In the meantime, they will laugh at you and stab you in the back, but the moment you give up the ghost they will say nothing but nice things. She will, and Stevie thanks her. She also says she’s done trying to impress people, and that she’s heading to the cafe because it’s always nice to dress for dinner.
The Rose family sits in the parents’ room, which is filled with flowers. Alexis looks at her phone and says Moira is alive again. Johnny says it looks like we’re back. Moira says it was fun while it lasted. Johnny wonders if they should return the gifts. Moira says they are perishable, and that it is the first time they have heard from most of the people The gifts are long overdue. Alexis learns that Cuppy the Kitten is dead. David looks at his phone, shocked to discover that “he stepped on her.” Alexis says Kelly Ripa is taking the day off. Johnny asks who? Moira asks what kind of kitten befriends a giraffe.
Tropes that Appear in This Episode
- Big Brother Instinct: David realizes that Alexis is in love with Ted.
- Brother–Sister Team: David and Alexis make a good team in this episode.
- Dead Artists Are Better: Celebrities that didn't give Moira's exile a second thought are singing her praises on social media when they believe she is dead.
- The Fashionista: Moira's outfit planning is a major plot point.
- History with Celebrity: Moira's celebrity friends grieve her, online at least.
- Innocently Insensitive: Jocelyn inadvertently insults Johnny's parenting.
- Reports of My Death Were Greatly Exaggerated: Moira's storyline is this trope.
- Serious Business: Johnny takes Roland's request to be his coming baby's godfather very seriously, including worrying about Roland's health.
- White-Dwarf Starlet: Moira was the person most projected to be nominated for a Daytime People's Choice Award never to win a Daytime People's Choice Award... or to secure a single nomination.
