By sword, by pick, by axe, bye bye!

—Tagline of The Mutilator

Kevin: Mom, we're in a hurry! We're gonna go bowling with Anthony.
Eddie: And then to the movies!
Mom: What movie?
Eddie: Garden Tool Massacre. It's your basic slice-and-dice.
Mom: Your basic what?
Eddie: Well, this guy in a hockey mask, he chops up a few teenagers.

Guy in theater: Watch this. He's gonna get the camp counselor with the hedge trimmer.
<Screams and ripping of flesh>
Guy in theater: I'll bet the girl gets away. Watch. She's gonna run in the lodge and hide. But he's gonna get her anyway!

Movie Character: Jamie! Jamie! C'mon, this isn't funny anymore! It's cold and I'm only wearing a very thin old t-shirt and tiny little panties!
Rallo: Don't go out there you hot dummy!
<Girl is killed by a Captain Ersatz of Jason Voorhees>