Quotes / Obsessively Normal

It's in the order of their hedgerows
It's in the way their curtains open and close
It's in the look they give you down their nose
All part of decency's jigsaw, I suppose

— XTC, "Respectable Street"

"I don't trust a man that doesn't have something strange going on about him, 'cause that means he's hiding it from you. If a man's wearing his pants on his head or if he says his words backwards from time to time, you know it's all laid out there for you. But if he's friendly to strangers and keeps his home spick-and-span, more often than not he's done something even his own ma couldn't forgive."

— No-bark Noonan, Fallout: New Vegas

You can call me Yoshikage Kira. I am currently 33 years old. Not that you'd care, but I reside in north-east Morioh's villa district. Also, I've yet to marry. In order to make a living, I work for Kame Yu department stores. After a long day's work, I return home no later than 8 PM. I don't like smoking but I do enjoy the occasional drink. I'm always in bed by 11 PM and I make it a point to get no less than eight hours of sleep each night. Before bed, I drink a warm glass of milk. It's always coupled with twenty minutes of stretching to decompress from a long work day. Sweet dreams are the usual result of this. I then awake as fresh and recharged as a newborn child, ready to take on the day's challenges, and after my last check-up, I was given a clean bill of health. For as long as I can remember, I've done everything in my power to live a productive life, that allows me to pursue a lasting inner peace. This may be a foreign concept, but I choose not to concern myself with winning or losing, life's troubles, or enemies who bring sleepless nights. That is how I cope with this backwards life we find ourselves living. It's what brings me happiness in a world fraught with hardship and misery. Of course, if I were ever to engage in combat, I would win the battle without question.

— Yoshikage Kira, JoJo's Bizarre Adventure: Diamond is Unbreakable

Good lord! The rod up that man's butt must have a rod up its butt!

— Superintendent Chalmers after witnessing Principal Skinner's routine, The Simpsons

In some places, this hair might be odd in like a cool way, but not at Seabrook. People here hate ANYTHING that's different. If anyone outside my family found out I wore a wig, I would never be allowed to cheer. So, I've worn a wig for as long as I can remember.

— Addison Wells, Z-O-M-B-I-E-S (2018)

Discord: I was just trying to act normal.
Fluttershy: Yeah, and now you're disappearing because normal doesn't exist.
Discord: Wait, it doesn't?
Fluttershy: The kind of normal you're trying to pull off, like, not being eccentric or quirky in any way? No, that's not real. I mean, yeah, there are people who make a concerted effort to avoid anything new or unusual or different, but that isn't normal. Those are the weirdest, creepiest people of all and every time I meet someone who likes things quiet and boring all the time, I can't stop wondering how many little kids they have tied up in their basement.
Discord: But, dude, you're like that.
Fluttershy: Did you ever wonder what happened to Twist?

— My Little Pony: Totally Legit Recap, "Discordant Harmony"

I’m so normal, it’s true
much more normal than you
you could stare inside my window and see nothing new.

— Nelward, "Normal"

---