"Lois and Tess decide that the best way to take Lionel down isn’t through a fight that would require expensive special effects or anything remotely interesting, but by examining his paperwork!
THRILL as Lois Lane calls the county records office!
CHILL as Tess Mercer waits for a Freedom of Information Act request to come through!
You Will Believe a man can make an error on his 1099!"
THRILL as Lois Lane calls the county records office!
CHILL as Tess Mercer waits for a Freedom of Information Act request to come through!
You Will Believe a man can make an error on his 1099!"
—Chris Sims and David Uzumeri on
Smallville ("Scion")
Smallville ("Scion")"O. J. Simpson was found guilty Friday on charges of armed robbery, assault, and kidnapping — but really murder."
Sawtooth: They must have committed some crime! They disassembled a robot!
Florence: Nickel has no owner. He was past his scrap date. Technically, no crime.
Sawtooth: Using false transponders.
Florence: Impersonating a truck is not a crime.
Sawtooth: Income tax evasion!
Florence: Only if they're taking money for what they're doing.
Sawtooth: Maybe they missed picking up some parts. We could get them for littering.
Florence: You're reaching.
Florence: Nickel has no owner. He was past his scrap date. Technically, no crime.
Sawtooth: Using false transponders.
Florence: Impersonating a truck is not a crime.
Sawtooth: Income tax evasion!
Florence: Only if they're taking money for what they're doing.
Sawtooth: Maybe they missed picking up some parts. We could get them for littering.
Florence: You're reaching.
Reno Jim Yurian: I've done what you've asked, and I've said what you wanted me to say. Now am I free to go?
Marshal Larsen: Nope. For starters, what you did to this town alone is enough to get you an appointment with the gallows. Then there's Sven Olsen. Oh, I knew him all right. A fine man. Horse thievin' and cattle rustling are both hanging offenses, so's murder of express agents and shotgun guards. No, Reno, it looks like you'll swing, for certain sure.
Reno Jim Yurian: But you promised [me amnesty].
Smoke Jensen: Yes, I did. That only applies to what you did to me and my men. I don't speak for Muddy Gap, or for the territorial attorney.
— Ordeal of the Mountain Man
FBI Agent: Capone, we know you're supplying Chicago with alcohol and you've been involved in countless murders.
Al Capone: Whoooah, look at you with the crazy talk. I ain't done none of that stuff.
FBI Agent: But, you're rich, right?
Capone: You're damn right I am!
FBI Agent: So where'd all the money come from, Capone?
Capone: (Moves closer) Alright, I'll let you in on a little secret, but you gotta promise not to tell anyone, ok? I (lifts hat to reveal stack of money) don't pay my taxes.
(FBI agents cock gun and put handcuffs on him)
Capone: WHOOOOAAAAH-
Al Capone: Whoooah, look at you with the crazy talk. I ain't done none of that stuff.
FBI Agent: But, you're rich, right?
Capone: You're damn right I am!
FBI Agent: So where'd all the money come from, Capone?
Capone: (Moves closer) Alright, I'll let you in on a little secret, but you gotta promise not to tell anyone, ok? I (lifts hat to reveal stack of money) don't pay my taxes.
(FBI agents cock gun and put handcuffs on him)
Capone: WHOOOOAAAAH-
— Oversimplified: Prohibition
Barba: There was no movie, there was never any intention to make a movie, your client traveled to Canada with the primary purpose of having sex with someone under the age of 18. A federal crime.
Brubeck: What's he talking about?
Barba: Sexual Tourism. Section 24, 23c of Title 18: engaging in illicit sexual conduct in foreign places. Punishable by up to 30 years in prison.
Defense Attorney: You can't be serious. That law's intention is to stop pedophiles from flying to Thailand to have sex with 12-year-olds!
Benson: Your client is a pedophile, and a rapist, and a murderer. [to Brubeck] And if this is the only way we can get you? Then this is the way that you're going down!
Brubeck: What's he talking about?
Barba: Sexual Tourism. Section 24, 23c of Title 18: engaging in illicit sexual conduct in foreign places. Punishable by up to 30 years in prison.
Defense Attorney: You can't be serious. That law's intention is to stop pedophiles from flying to Thailand to have sex with 12-year-olds!
Benson: Your client is a pedophile, and a rapist, and a murderer. [to Brubeck] And if this is the only way we can get you? Then this is the way that you're going down!
"Your "fuel of the future" just barbecued the world's most famous painting, you dumbass. Congratulations on the public launch of Klear, and the end of Miles Bron. You're ruined. And you did get your wish. To forever be remembered in the same breath… as the Mona Lisa."
—Helen Brand, Glass Onion
